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S76 PT #5: Push it to the limit Due: Sunday, May 12th @ 11:59 PM PST

Option 2

Playoff hockey is another beast, and it really separates good teams from great teams. What makes great teams? Well its when players can elevate their game to the next level for the playoffs. Playoff hockey becomes faster, tighter, and a lot more disciplined. To make my game to the next level I need to play quicker, and harder on the puck. It truly becomes much more of a two way game, you need to back check and play more positional hockey then the regular season as goals are often harder to come by. I would have a focus on my defensive game, trying to grind down the opposing team with a more physical style of play. Which will hopefully lead to more puck possession in the offensive zone to try and tire out the other team. Trying to get more pucks to the net and get that eventual go ahead goal. When having the lead it is important to not sit on it and still focus on playing offensive hockey.

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Injuries have devastated teams across all sports and all leagues, and even if no one wants to admit it, injuries have been the central cause in various teams championship runs. Would the Bucks have won in 2021 if Kyrie didn't get injured? Could the '09 Penguins really have overcome Detroit if Datsyuk and Lidstrom were healthy? The '08 Patriots went 11-5 and missed the playoffs... after losing Tom Brady for the season in week 1. The fact is, many seasons champions are determined by which team managed to stay the healthiest, rather than which team assembled the best group of players. Injuries can truly be the great equalizer, there is no preparing for it and it can strike anyone at any time. Except in the SHL of course, where for the 76th consecutive season, no player has missed a game due to injury. Which begs the question, why don't other leagues simply follow suit? Why should Flyers fans have to wonder what if Lindros never had injury and concussion problems? No one can ever complain an SHL team won the cup only because the other team got injured. It's incredulous that other league don't also do this!

Citadelles  S68 - Jarrod Lakemore - C Stampede

A simulation? What a crazy idea. The thought that these hockey players, and their lives are dictated by forces outside of their control is absolutely insane. At least, that's what we're conditioned to think. Andrade La Sombra would be lying if he said he felt normal on the ice. The high speed and fast-paced adrenaline of crashing into other players, shooting the puck and even being slammed into the windows... it's all shaken off the next day. It feels like La Sombra could do anything and not feel his own body's repercussions as a result. But La Sombra's a superstitious fellow; this sort of experiment can only be done on the ice, and nowhere else. After all, getting hurt outside the arena... he might not be able to recover if that happened!

That being said, La Sombra can't seem to put images in his head of the last time he wasn't on the ice. Sure, there's plenty of articles written about it, and words can come to mind very easily... but graphically? There's nothing there. Something to think about that leaves his mind as soon as the timer starts in the arena... and he plans on playing with no fear of long-lasting injuries.

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1) I don't know how they're doing it, but I know that I don't like it. You'd think it'd be nice to not get injured, but it gets a little scary after a while. Like the other day in practice I was going full speed into the corner for a drill, caught an edge weird and went neck first into the boards. It didn't even hurt! I swear I heard a snap but when I stood up it was like nothing happened. I had a teammate take a swing at my face in the locker room with their stick later that day and they knocked a bunch of teeth onto the floor, but then when I looked in the mirror they were all back in my mouth. I tried to find the ones they knocked out but there was nothing. It's like we're all immortal. I mean it's good in a way but... I don't know. What happenes when everyone that I know and love dies? Then what?

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So why hasn't the SHL had injuries in 70something seasons of play (idk i'm bad at counting)? Well, the reason is simple. We got Nurse Joy in all the locker rooms, going around with that healing machine but tailored towards humans, instantly recovering them free of charge. It's a good thing they're free of charge too because these card packs won't buy themselves. After every game, every player is put in that machine; while cosmetic evidence of any injuries such as missing teeth or bruises remain, every joint is repaired, every bone mended, every muscle relaxed. True, we could have actual injuries that require weeks and months of rehab, but the fans paid to see these players and by god those players are going to play whether the health gods agree or not. Hell, we have simply become the health gods ourselves. Deicide is fun! Especially when it means better hockey can be played!

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Thanks to @Ragnar, @Symmetrik, @Merica, @enigmatic, and @sulovilen for the sigs! 
Avi courtesy of @MN_Moosey
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Citadelles Switzerland Stars Blizzard 
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It's definitely a simulation. Never have you seen a league - or a team - in any sport period that has not had a single injury over the course of the season, or a player be held out of a match due to illness, or a player needing a rest break because they've played 50 games in a row. The simulation aspect of the league is the part that makes it viable for us to use and to remove the potential for injuries, but it also is what makes it so that half our players are absolutely ass for no reason. It's why a team that's been rude and condescending to everyone else is outplaying their TPE levels while playing a 900 TPE goalie and beating a team with, on average, 300 more TPE per player and a goalie that is incredible. It's why each season, goalies get fucked and nobody likes being a goalie. Because since we have injuries off, the sim has to compensate somehow.

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Thanks to EAB and sulovien for the sigs!

I like to believe that the advanced medical achievements that this universe has come up with plays a big role in the health and recovery of the SHL players. You do not see players taking games off for injuries because the doctors and scientists of the world were able to create vitamins that build strength and quicken recovery times. Break a finger, that is a 2 hour heal time with today's modern medicine. I believe that we live in a universe where things are generally better for everyone. So why can't the medicine also be better? Of course there are those that believe we all live in a simulation where literally everything is fake and the health of people is of no concern. That could be true, I just have not seen the evidence of that. I have taken a red pill or two to heal a bruise or fracture from the aftermath of a hockey game. The medicine is there. The cures are there. We're all lucky enough to have access to these video game like health potions.

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RIP Dangel #AD26  |  RIP TDZ

OPTION 1

It is not all just a simulation, even though the league name and some other things may suggest something else. The key to the non-existent injuries is the league's secret medical program. It is based on some very advanced scientific technologies. All teams actually have access to a device called FBBuS (Full Body Back-up System). This means that every day the players give a blood sample that's then uploaded to a database. The blood sample is then analyzed and generated into a full back-up of the person's body at that moment. Once the device has processed this data, it's possible to extract a pill that, once swallowed, fully restores the body to the back-up version in 5 minutes. This means that even if a player breaks bones or loses consciousness, if they can get the pill down the player's throat, in 5 minutes they will be as good as new. Now you might think that this would mean that the players would never get any worse, because their body wouldn't age. But the system actually has built-in regression mechanism, that after certain age, decreases the functionality of the body, resulting as the players getting worse by age.

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Prompt 2, go BAP

Keeping the play at the same level into the playoffs is a high bar for M’Baku Olubori. He was already playing at a potential league MVP level, smashing his career previous high in goals (previously 41, now 56) and matching his career best 109 points. That being said, he has some history of elevating his play with the games are most important. Since the S73 postseason, Baku has scored 17 goals and 49 points in 31 playoff games. With the Platoon’s lethal balanced attack this season, there’s hope that Baku will continue his scoring pace. Even if he doesn’t, and opposing teams key on shutting him down, it’s likely that opens up opportunities for one of Baltimore’s other lines to feast on mismatches. For much of the season, the top 2 scorers for the Platoon were separated, making it harder for teams to shut down the potent Bergmark-Baku pairing. The addition of another all league player in Matsmith Soderberg-Tremblay and the continued growth of the Green Line (the Liebold brothers centered by Ekaterina Valieva, named as all played for green-dominant J teams, Kelowna x2 and Vancouver) paints a tough picture for any team trying to lock BAP down defensively.

In summary, Baku may not always have the big scoring game, but if he’s not, someone else probably will.

Platoon Elk Elk Platoon
Argonauts Argonauts
PlatoonGermanyRaptors

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Thank you karey, OrbitingDeath Ragnar, and sköldpaddor for sigs! 
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Prompt Two

Inge Baardsen could very well be said to be made for playoff hockey. Everyone knows the game gets even more physical in the playoffs, and who better to have on your team than the overwhelming Hits leader from the regular season? Baardsen is not a big, hulking enforcer, he is just a very enthusiastic forechecker, and backchecker. Just everything checker. He is not afraid to throw his weight around with players much bigger than himself, and it got him into a couple of fights (should probably work on that fighting….). He’s combative, abrasive, but he is not a goon, he can really play hockey! He has great hands on the stick and a superb eye for a pass. He can also score enough to be a viable threat. His specialty seems to be forechecking hard and dispossessing opposing players in their own zone and scoring unassisted, has happened a few times this season. If he can keep that up, then who knows how far Regina can go?

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Option 2

I love how Baltimore and Ekaterina are playing their best hockey right now. It’s also fun to see how teams are trying to counter our lines because all three have amazing players. Valieva is usually an okay tournament or playoff player. She has never played for a point per game in the playoffs, displaying a rather weak defensive game even though that is her specialty. Now, Ekaterina is playing a role that she is not used to. After a season where she contributed to the defensive aspects of the game, the Liebold sandwich line is playing a much more offensive role. Valieva is scoring a lot. She’s third in goals and second in points, without playing on the power play. She’s used a lot on the penalty kill, and BAP’s stats are weaker than usual, but still able to contribute on the 5v5. Will she be able to keep up the level of play throughout all of the playoffs? I have no idea, but it’s fun to see Ekaterina making the difference in important games right now.

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Ekaterina Valieva - Baltimore Platoon

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Thanks @Lazyeye for the sig!

The Newfoundland Berserkers are ready to push their game into another gear this postseason. Already dominating Yukon in their first series, we have primed ourselves to play our best hockey at the right time. I give credit to our playoff experience last year and then keeping our core in tact. Our players were ready for this playoffs and hope to bring it home this year. We didn’t expend too much energy in the regular season so we are ready to put it all on the line in the postseason. A huge plus is that our GMs give us the good smelling salts before postseason games. Patty said he makes them in his garage. Overall, the locker room stays the same. A very cool, calm, and collected group that isn’t afraid of the moment. We don’t want to win it all, we expect to. The postseason is just another business trip for this star studded team.

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I like to think that the SHL is like that off crazy league that allows anyone in, and thats what makes it so entertaining. We have steroids, we have some crazy names, some ex-cons maybe, some fugitives on the run that decide to play hockey under some sort of alias.
Once you start thinking like that, it really makes you wonder how wild this league really is and how many characters there are in here. It would be a cross between like the movie Death Race and the WWE, but in hockey format. You have the wild teams and the crazy idea that is Death Race, but then you have the personality aspect and the entertainment aspect of WWE, put that on ice with some skates, gloves, and some vulcanized rubber and what do you get? The SHL. It would even be cool to have those hallway interactions like in WWE, those scripted dialogues would make for funny media days in the world of hockey, in my honest opinion.

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Thanks to @enigmatic , @Ragnar and @sulovilen for the sexy Signature

Prompt 1

The obvious answer to how none of our players end up inured is that we are all athletes at the top of our game who train day in and day out and know our bodies so intimately that we can prevent any injury before it happens. We have complete control over our minds and bodies and are able to prevent things that would injure or incapacitate a normal human being. It's the reason that we can play for 30+ minutes a night week in and week out and have no fatigue or injuries. We are the peak, the pinnacle, the paramount of human athleticism. We know exactly what to do to avoid injury. Exactly how to train. Exactly what our limits are. There is nothing that could physically harm us on that ice and we know it. The SHL is the best league in the world because of our superhuman abilities.

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