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ec06aaj · 11-23-2023, 06:06 PM

1.

Sunday. The day after the draft, when the lives of another wave of rookies took another turn. Some would be happier than others how the chips had fallen.

2.

Simo rises before the sun does today. Before the junior league draft brought him Detroit, almost dead on a year to the day, Simo had come up with an idea - more accurately, his twin brother Ilmari had come up with the idea and dared Simo into doing it, knowing just how susceptible Simo was to dares or challenges. He'd done it last year; he was going to do it this year, and every year until his playing days were over.

3.

He sets his stopwatch. One hour, twenty four minutes, twenty one seconds. At his normal running pace, somewhere between seven and eight miles an hour, he would expect to cover about ten miles, and he's planned the route ahead of time.

4.

After the season, after the brutalising by the Timber, the Falcons dispersed for the offseason. Simo knew a lot of them were choosing to stay in the States regardless of where they came from but he'd demurred. He'd been staying in a small and fairly crappy apartment the team owned and used as a flophouse, for players to crash at for a day or so at a time - not months - to save as much money as he could. There had been invitations, very kind gestures of spare rooms, but Simo was intent on going home.

5.

It is freezing. The sun isn't going to rise for another hour, at minimum, and winter has come hard to Tampere this year. It hasn't snowed for a couple of days and the conditions are reasonable for running, but the ground is frozen solid. Every step Simo takes on the grass comes with a satisfying crunching of ice and a deep footprint left behind, glistening under the white light of the lampposts.

6.

The first day or two of home was a wonderful trap, a deep pit lined with nostalgia and creature comforts almost designed to suck him in and keep him snared in the motherland. Both sides of the family came together to celebrate having their big American superstar back - a rare and precious gem, to see both his mother and stepfather and his father and fiancee in the same room without screaming - and Simo spent a night in his old bedroom, surrounded by mementos and reasons to stay. He ate like a king for a day, a single delightful cheat day of hamburgers and ice cream, forgetting about hockey entirely for 24 hours, and decompressing.

7.

The lake looks like it's frozen solid and been frozen for weeks as Simo turns a corner. The morning mist doesn't feel as cloying as when he stepped out of the house, now he's got some momentum going. The muscles are warming up and it feels good.

8.

Timezones and their respective schedules meant finding time to speak to his brother was often an exercise in futility but, with Simo back on the right side of the ocean and Ilmari the golden boy of the Bundesliga, the boys were back in town together. Ilmari had to leave training, get changed immediately and drive straight to the airport to make his flight thanks to a particularly tough session - naturally, the first thing he suggested to Simo on landing was the sauna.

9.

Simo hits the first hill. He's a mile in and feeling the groove and, when you feel comfortable in a routine, you have to make sure you don't get complacent. He sets his jaw and leans forward.

10.

Simo actively refused to get drawn into it: he knew most of his teammates are keen to sound the big league out and find out where they might be heading, and wanted no part of it. He told all of the scouts who reached out the same thing, often literally - he was not interested in flaming out, he wanted to have a long career, to put in the miles, and truly did not have a problem with any scenario a team throws at him. Four years in the junior leagues? Fine. Immediate call-up to the top pairing? Bring it on. Bounce between the minors and the majors? If the team will cover his travel, feel free to load him up with air miles. Ilmari, meanwhile, did the research.

11.

Thighs burning, quads engaged, Simo powers up the hill and enjoys the descent. Early Sunday morning the road is quiet, but not silent, but Simo isn't here to enjoy the ambience. He's listening to what he has playing through the headphones, to an extent. The voices are both white noise and not actually important yet - they won't be important until he hits the end of the run.

12.

The mock drafts were promising. First round, going to Buffalo. First round, going to the Calgary Dragons. First round, taken by the Forge; be it good analysis, rumours and hearsay or just plain guesswork, Simo would be getting his name called in the first twenty picks.

13.

Simo's hitting his stride when his phone vibrates; he knows the way well enough to take a look and not slow down. It's funny - just as he hears "Emil Karlsson" in his ears, Emil Karlsson messages him in the Falcons' rookie group chat. One of the biggest positives Simo has cited about landing in Detroit has been the locker room, but especially the bond between the rookie class. Probably there was some fancy psychological reason to be had but, whatever the reasons, the young Falcons are a tight-knit group. A tight-knit and unexpectedly bohemian group, as well. Tomlander and Karlsson both hail from Sweden, even if Karlsson was about three times closer to Simo than his countryman, and the language barrier is minimal. The same can't be said for where Emil is going to spend his time in the big leagues, though. A Swede speaking Quebecoise is going to be a delight to see.

14.

Simo tried to prepare. The rest of the Falcons still in the States were going to connect up to find their fates and promised to keep him informed of how it all shook down - to his family's dismay, Simo wanted to exile himself. No parties, no celebrations, nothing until the decision had been made and he could react to it properly. He wanted to stay clear-handed about it...but his damn brother had had to intervene. "First-round pick" sounded so good, so tempting, and why would you not want to celebrate right there and then when somebody recognised your talent and potential for what it was?

15.

The phone keeps vibrating. Simo doesn't look at it this time. Detroit to Tampere is eight hours difference - he's awake before Sunday dawn to run and purge himself while his teammates are enjoying a Saturday night. To think the talking heads made comments about his work ethic when he first turned up.

16.

Nice as the idea was, something about the little party felt off to the guest of honour; Simo had a feeling of awful trepidation watching his brother set up the stream and his family mingle. it was one thing to be confident and to bet on yourself but the word rattling around his head was overconfidence. He felt exposed.

17.

More than half his course is done and Simo turns for home, breathing not hard but steadily and evenly. Everything is stamina in sport these days, even in a sport played in minute-long shifts like hockey, and doubly so for the unloved blueliners. Last season Simo averaged 21 minutes a game, almost a full day spent on the ice, and towards the end of the year he felt it in his bones. The rigours of the season are punishing enough by themselves, before you ever place skate to ice against another team.

18.

The picks started to flow. Simo flicked a couple of congratulatory messages in the Falcons group chat after three to Tomlander, in between the genial abuse being sent his way for having to live in Seattle and Marek's friendly "cant believe u werent even first loser". The Argonauts had 3 players with more than 20 goals. Will was going to have his work already cut out for him.

19.

A bead of sweat trickles past his eye. This is where Simo knew things were going to start to get properly tough - if he remembers the map right, he should be at or passing the 10 kilometre mark, and that's the normal length of his workout runs. None of it is uncharted territory, but now he isn't going to be able to run it on auto-pilot.

20.

Emil went next. He got none of the insults they'd thrown at Tomlander - none of them had called him going this high at all - and the tone was elated. Nobody had expected Simo to be up here either, but that wasn't stopping the tiny little feeling of sickness and nerves.

21.

The wall is approaching. It comes for every runner when they go long-distance, the only questions are how long it takes to arrive and whether you have the willpower to punch through it. Or, in some cases, the ability to shut your brain down and stop thinking long enough to get past it.

22.

Into the teens. The pit in Simo's stomach started to widen. Defensive players were going off the board and the names were not promising; Enevoldsen was where the alarm bells began to ring. He played for a better team and scored more points than Simo, but the underlying numbers Simo knew he had the edge on. He'd been reassured that the big league staff were smart, not people to get dazzled by the boxscores if the analytics didn't work, and this...this worried him.

23.

If your mind wanders while on the road - the track, the park, wherever - it can lead you into some awful places. Nothing kills a run dead quicker than daydreaming about what you'll do at the end of it: a hot shower, something decent to eat, even just getting your shoes off, all of it has to be ignored because all of it will shred your focus in a heartbeat.

24.

Marek Carda, first-round pick for the Philadelphia Forge, at #19. Karlsson was a surprise; maybe Marek should not have been. He'd been the Falcons' top rookie scorer, he'd beaten Tomlander to that title, but he'd been totally ignored by the analysts. God only knew why. But the Forge had back-to-back picks - they didn't have a weak spot up and down the roster and maybe, having just picked up an impact forward, they'd look for defense? The logic was sound, the logic was fine, but then Leonard Wood's name came out of the Forge representative's mouth. Without his family noticing, Simo slid into the second round and out of the door.

25.

The home stretch. Once more, Simo comes face to face with the hill; it appears to have doubled in size and tripled in slope over the last hour, but this was all part of the plan. He bites down and digs in, remembering the embarrassment and the shame of yesterday and using the curdling emotions to push him up harder and harder. Nobody else would beat themselves up like this - Simo knows this isn't a healthy mindset - but it isn't anybody else's business how he motivates himself. Some people need positivity, some need negativity. Carrot and stick.

26.

"With the seventh pick of the second round, pick number 27 overall, the Minnesota Monarchs are proud to select defenseman Simo Jaaskelainen." But he was long gone. Simo wanted congratulations even less than he wanted pity or comfort. Just like every setback on his path, when things went wrong for Simo he wanted solitude and snow.

27.

"With the seventh pick of the second round, pick number 27 overall, the Minnesota Monarchs are proud to select defenseman Simo Jaaskelainen." One hour, twenty four minutes, twenty one seconds from the first pick of the draft to hearing his name, Simo finally lets himself slow up and leans against a tree. He plucks out his headphones and lets the wires dangle. There are lessons to be learned from this debacle - believe in nothing but what you can do and what you can affect, because you can't rely on anybody else. Don't plan and don't pin your hopes on anything that isn't in your hands. Don't ever put yourself in a position to be embarrassed like this again. Simo thinks of them all as the sweat dries. Grey fingers of light are starting to leak over the horizon but save his breathing, everything is silent. There's nothing but solitude and snow as the sun rises on Simo and the rest of his life.

[2316 words. Any suggestion I am instilling my own worldview in my character will be treated with contempt even though it's completely correct.]

spidey · 11-23-2023, 07:01 PM

I love this! I remember my first draft and watching name after name being called. Falling into the second round and still waiting wondering where and when I would be called. This article brought back so many memories. In the end, ending up in the perfect place for me.

I hope this ends up the same for yourself. Fantastic article.

*roastpuff* · 11-24-2023, 05:11 AM

Don’t worry. You’ll prove the doubters wrong.

ibuprofenaddict · 11-24-2023, 10:30 AM

This is so good. Fredrick Backman-esque. A sure fire steal at 27.

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