SMJHL S25 Prospect Watch

There has been a flurry of interest in a new SMJHL Prospect coming out of Iceland. Discovered by the same agent who lured <s>superstar</s> <s>star</s> player Riko Muerto out of the tiny northern island nation, defenseman Wyatt Wøllker is attracting a lot of interest from GM Scouts.

He's tall but a bit thin, could use some more flesh on his bones. He has that long blonde Nordic hair. He skates on the ice like a person born to it - which in many ways, he was!


From an early age, Wøllker seemed destined for winter games!

He played his minor hockey in the little-known Westeros Northern league, for the Bjøndthewall Others. He proved to be a cool customer on the ice, with a skating stride which could literally freeze his opponents in their tracks. He seems to always be on the attack, relentless in his desire to dominate every shift. The Others made it all the way to the finals, dispatching of the Craster Wives and the Freeland Wildlings in their first two series, before being shut down in the Finals by the Castle Black Crows.


Wøllker draws a penalty for slashing, but is injured on the play. His team goes to lose the series.

What is Wøllker all about? Some say he has a very frosty demeanor, and can be a little flaky, but those closest to him say he is actually pretty cool, and an ice guy outside the rink. He has been reluctant to speak to the press, but he has a thriving side career as a male model - a master of the Zoolander 'Blue Steel' stare.


Chill, dude

And while he may not give very many interviews, he seems to have quite a few followers already.


Ummm, these are Twitter followers, right?


Wøllker will get his first chance to play against his <s>victims</s> opponents in the Prospect Tourney as a member of the Outlaws. His team will be looking for his ability to seemingly control the play effortlessly to lead to lots of celebrations!


He SCOOOOOOORRRRRRESSSSSS!!!!!

So keep your eyes on this player, my friends, because a Winner is Coming, and that's snow joke!

      S76 SMJHL DRAFT 3RD OVERALL PICK     
                     IIHF TEAM NORWAY                      

*falls off chair laughing*

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I hate puns. But great article.

He's not a true viking like Vilhjalmsson, regardless of how white and walkery he might think he is.