Login

mel24 · 08-01-2017, 02:44 PM

TASK TWO: Pre-Party! Create a drink menu for the arena to sell during the playoff series. Must have four drink specials named after two players each team and have a brief description of each drink! Must be at least 150 words total. If graphic, create a menu that contains four drinks, brief description and price!
Here in Seattle, we’re hosting some finals viewing parties for all of our loyal fans! As an incentive, every fan who actually shows up and buys a ticket gets a voucher for a free, Challenge Cup themed drink. With four options to chose from, there’s something for everyone, except for a playoff victory for the Riot.

Sammee “Slam Me” Iqbal: You’re offered a glass of golden whiskey, but once you’re two rounds into the drink, the bartender takes it from you and absolutely douses it in Curaçao, turning the gold a bright blue - or maybe it’s more of a teal? Definitely teal. For a special bundle deal, you can get the "Glittery Tits", which turns from blue to gold!

Wild Wally: A classic rum and coke, which is very different from the “Happy Haas” offered early in the playoffs, which was a rum and Pepsi.

Kooky Kirkstone: A classy red wine spritzer for the fancier fans among us! For a special request, it can be made with grape soda instead.

Mark “Starter Harter”: This is like, super sweet. Like, uncomfortably sweet? You take like three sips and you want to put it down, but after you let it sit for five games, it’s suddenly the best thing you’ve tasted in your life.
>195 words

TASK THREE: Write a script for the game day preview for Game One of the Finals. Must be at least 150 words.
It’s been a wild playoffs this season, but we’ve finally arrived at the Challenge Cup Finals, and what a series it’s shaping up to be. Both teams undoubtedly have something to prove, with Portland coming off a Finals loss to Manhattan last season, and Toronto trying desperately to break the curse that’s hounded them since they were established. It would be the first Challenge Cup for both teams, so there’s a lot riding on this series, marking it maybe as one of the most memorable finals in recent SHL history.
Both teams have had nearly identical routes through their respective divisions, defeating the number one seed in round two, although the Admirals took it all the way to seven game against the Dragons. It’s unclear if the North Stars getting more rest before the finals start will matter, after taking down New England in only five games, but it could have an impact on the longevity of the series.
>159 words

TASK FOUR: Who is your choice for the S35 Playoff MVP to this point? Must be 150 words.
There were a lot of standout performances from both teams in the finals, as well as from other players throughout the playoffs, but the S35 MVP in my opinion has to be Cynthia Taylor. Although Kyle Wahlgren has played some amazing hockey for Portland, it’s the unsung defendor from Toronto who’s really helped them achieve everything they’ve accomplished. Playing over thirty minutes a game, Taylor was a constant on the North Star’s back end throughout the playoffs, and played just barely under a point-per-game pace. Although she only took a few shots, and none found the back of the net, her physical style of play and her playmaking helped the North Stars dominate these playoffs. She’s stayed at a steady +/- 6, while also recording the highest number of blocked shots on the team. The North Stars have plenty of star defensemen and other star players who will likely get the nod over Taylor, but I think her name is definitely one that should be coming up more often.
>168 words

TASK SEVEN: Create a 'Tale of the Tape' poster between two players of your choice from the finals. Must include renders, player names, team logos, and 5 player statistics.
[Image: mbx295N.png]

JumpierPegasus · 08-01-2017, 03:44 PM

Code:
TASK TWO: Pre-Party! &nbsp;Create a drink menu for the arena to sell during the playoff series. &nbsp;Must have four drink specials named after two players each team and have a brief description of each drink! &nbsp;Must be at least 150 words total. If graphic, create a menu that contains four drinks, brief description and price!

The Portland arena was built in part by Zach Miller and his team way back in Season 25. An extravagant restaurant overlooking the ice where you could have a drink and watch your team play was built. Meant for mainly press box members this restauarant served drinks you wouldn't normally find in the concession stands of the arena. Here you could get some real fancy stuff.

Banananov Boat -- Half part banana liquor, half part light rum, 2 parts vanilla ice cream, half part white cocoa liquor, 1 slice banana. Fill a blender with ice cubes. Add all ingredients. Blend and pour into a chilled wine glass. Garnish with banana. Named after Portland forward Chernika Banananov

Appleveli -- 1 1/2 parts vodka, 2/3 apple liquor, 2/3 part apple juice, 3/4 lemon juice, 1/2 part simple syrup. Fill a shaker with ice cubes. Add all ingredients. Shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Named after Veli KaalinpÃ¤Ã¤ and his favourite drink, the appletini

Beer - Yeah they still serve beer up here. But super fancy craft bullshit because Portland

Caesar - The large Canadian contingent on this team has led them to releasing a caesar into their bars upstairs. Made like a regular caesar and garnished with 5 bacon strips.

Code:
TASK THREE: Write a script for the game day preview for Game One of the Finals. &nbsp;Must be at least 150 words.

This season we will see a new winner. The Toronto North Stars, a team who has been snakebitten their entire time in the SHL. The leagues oldest franchise and one of the most sorrowly storied, they have never been able to pull off the win, and have gone their entire lives not seeing Challenge Cup glory. The Portland Admirals are a team who faced rebuilding for the first 7 years of existence, but now they make the finals for the second year in a row. This is their opportunity, and losing twice is not on their agenda. Both these teams come in with a chip on their shoulder, and we can't imagine anything but a hard fought series between these two. Not powerhouses by any means, these teams banded together when it counted and went on to the finals, ousting some fantastic teams in their wake. The puck will drop for game 1 and all bets are off, one team will be crowned a champion

Code:
TASK FOUR: Who is your choice for the S35 Playoff MVP to this point? Must be 150 words.

Damien Wert both stepped up for Toronto during the season and stepped up in the playoffs. While you can make a case for Eriksson, who had a physical impact, as well as on the scoresheet, Wert played big minutes for Toronto. He was their workhorse in every situation, and ended the playoffs an exellent +11. Without him Toronto would be without a centre who could go out in all situations. A seriously strong playoffs from him, after a fantastic season.

You could also make a case for Kyle Wahlgren in very Brandon Sawyer-esque fashion. We watched as Wahlgren played out of his mind these playoffs, posting up ridiculous save percentage numbers behind an okay team. While solid, Portland relied on Wahlgren all season and playoffs, proving why having a goalie who is in the zone is so important. I could see him winning MVP of the playoffs and going on to have an absolutely stellar career, akin to some greats like McBride, Aittokallio, Jesster, Prikulus and more. Just a phenominal job and reminds me of Brandon Sawyer's S6 performance in Minnesota

Code:
TASK FIVE: &nbsp;Media Day once again! &nbsp;Create three questions, one for three different players in the Challenge Cup and tag them

<a href='index.php?showuser=2236' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Wally</a> - How does it feel to be a rookie goaltender fighting in the Challenge Cup? Such a feat is rarely seen

<a href='index.php?showuser=1117' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>AlwaysGettingHaxed</a> - After bouncing around for so long, trying to find a permanent home and trying to win a Cup, how good would it feel to break the Toronto curse?

<a href='index.php?showuser=19' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Jesster</a> - Many thought you lost out on a huge chance to win a Cup after being traded from Texas to Toronto. Well now you are close and they are out, why do you think people underestimated your team?

Alucard · 08-01-2017, 04:09 PM

Task One
[FAO: <a href='index.php?showuser=1766' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>karlssens</a> ]

Itâ€™s no secret that there is some history between Russia and Germany, but thatâ€™s not to say that the two nations canâ€™t get along. Of course, that too is not to say that those from either nation canâ€™t have a bit of fun with the preexisting enmity between the former Soviet Union and the former Nazi Germany. Ahead of Game One of the S35 Challenge Cup Finals, members of the Edmonton Blizzard arranged to meet up and watch the inaugural game of the S35 spectacle. For Ivan Koroviev, the Russian vodka-swilling extraordinaire, it was an opportunity not to be missed.

Given that everyone in attendance were to make their own way to the party â€“Â group transport had not been arranged â€“Â centre Nikolaus Scholz had, of course, planned on taking his flashy Mercedes SLR to travel to the party. Having awoken and broken his nightly fast on sauerkraut and a dirndl-garbed young German lady, the German international made his way towards his car, only to find that someone had decorated with a large Hitler moustache and a red banner down the side bearing the words BLIZZ HEIL. Tasteless? Perhaps, but that didnâ€™t stop the Finlandia-scented Koroviev from practically wetting himself with laughter when his teammate was forced to drive his girlfriendâ€™s Volkswagen Polo to the viewing party. Russiansâ€¦

Task Two
S35 Challenge Cup Finals Drinks Menu

Admiral Lundberg â€“Â a shot of Udenberg mixed with a dash of liquid cannabis, for that authentic Kelowna, B.C. flavour.
Power Pedro â€“Â mezcal, sotol, and tequila, all mixed together in a Sombrero-shaped hat, because somebody let Koroviev design the menu, and he still thinks Sarantez is Mexican.
Taylor Made â€“Â more of a dish than a drink, this hefty beaut comprises a half-plate of poutine served IN a half-pint of stiff English bitters.

Bonus Blizzard Drinks Menu (because I made two drinks before I realised this was supposed to be about the finalsâ€¦ I think)

Gold-Scholz-Fast â€“Â Gets you hammered fast: two shots of GoldschlÃ¤ger, two shots of JÃ¤germeister, a half-can of Red Bull, and just a splash of man juice provided by Edmontonâ€™s favourite German centre.
Ivan Corona-viev â€“Â Simple but effective, this drink consists of 330ml of pure vodka served in a Corona bottle, because who needs to drink piss when you drink potatoes by the third?

fever95 · 08-01-2017, 04:10 PM

TASK ONE: Decorate your teammates car for the big game! Can be written or graphic. If written, tell us how you plan on "decorating" your teammates ride before leaving for the viewing party and must be 150 words.
[Image: X9oZ6p8.png]

TASK TWO: Pre-Party! Create a drink menu for the arena to sell during the playoff series. Must have four drink specials named after two players each team and have a brief description of each drink! Must be at least 150 words total. If graphic, create a menu that contains four drinks, brief description and price!
[Image: hTzlvUu.png]

TASK SIX: Create a SHL Challenge Cup viewing party invitation! Must include a list of 3 special guest appearances for your fans and a list of 4 events being held at the viewing party (i.e. Poker Tournament, Bean Bag Tournament, etc.)
[Image: gXGqtH6.png]

TASK SEVEN: Create a 'Tale of the Tape' poster between two players of your choice from the finals. Must include renders, player names, team logos, and 5 player statistics.
[Image: iUvDshP.png]

Zombiewolf · 08-01-2017, 04:18 PM

TASK ONE: Decorate your teammates car for the big game! Can be written or graphic. If written, tell us how you plan on "decorating" your teammates ride before leaving for the viewing party and must be 150 words.

I have decided to decorate NICOLAS WINTERS car today because why not. Winter owns a classic Camaro. It truly is a beautiful car and I will pimp his ride out to make it look even better. I have decided to put four Buffalo Stampede flags on his car. One on each of his windows. I will put green dice on his rearview mirror to freshen the car up. His horn, when honked, will sound like a truck horn so that he can let everybody knows he’s the boss. The rims on his wheels will be a nice sea green and a picture of my face will be plastered on the back of the car. To show my support to the all knowing Walrus I will use intriguing Walrus seat covers. I believe the Walrus seat covers will make for a nice touch. The steering wheel will be decked out with green grip.

TASK TWO: Pre-Party! Create a drink menu for the arena to sell during the playoff series. Must have four drink specials named after two players each team and have a brief description of each drink! Must be at least 150 words total. If graphic, create a menu that contains four drinks, brief description and price!

During the Portland Admirals and Calgary Dragons series the names of some of the drinks became extra creative. A few players were lucky enough to have a few drinks named after them. The first two drinks were named after two of the Portland Admirals players Patrick Brumm and Max Weber. Two Calgary Dragon’s players Schnitinfritz Jagr and Hunter Wong
The Patrick Brumm’s cum: This was one of the most popular drinks it was a very sweet whiteish drink. Made with Bacardi, Malibu Rum and pineapple juice. Basically, Caribou Lou but with a few added ingredients to give it the white coloring. This was selling for $12 a glass.
Max Weber’s triple header shandy: This was also an instant hit. This drink included a lodger from a Portland brewery, lemonade and served with a lime. This was sold for $8.
Schnitinfritz Jagr’s Hammer: This was a great choice as a drink. Included a shot of Absolute Vodka, one shot of Fireball and Coca Cola vanilla. This drink was sold for $10
Wong’s Song: This included a shot of whiskey and Heineken as well as a lemon. This was sold for $6.

TASK FOUR: Who is your choice for the S35 Playoff MVP to this point? Must be 150 words.
The Toronto North Stars finally won a challenge up after years of fighting for it. Toronto truly worked hard for this and deserve all of it. This is why I must pick a player from their team and looking though the team Captain Kristen Eriksson makes a strong case. Despite that I will not choose him.

My choice is none other than Damien Wert from the Toronto North Stars. While he had three less goals scored than teammate Kristen Eriksson, his +11 +/- is phenomenal. Not to mention 20 points in 17 games should be enough to give him this award. This shows that Damien Wert worked as hard as he can every time he was on the ice. Damien Wert was a huge part of Toronto’s regular season success and he did not stop producing once playoff started. Damien Wert was even disciplined throughout the entire playoffs recording a grand total of zero penalty minutes. Wert never stopped helping out the Toronto North Stars.

TASK FIVE: Media Day once again! Create three questions, one for three different players in the Challenge Cup and tag them! Playing in the Challenge Cup? Feel free to answer questions for your task or ask three of your own!

<a href='index.php?showuser=9' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-54'>raymond3000</a>: After 14 seasons of fighting how does it feel to finally lead your team to victory and lift the Challenge Cup?

<a href='index.php?showuser=2236' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Wally</a>: You worked hard and built the Admirals from the ground up. Almost winning the Challenge Cup but coming up short by two goals in game seven. With that being said do you think you will have the same success next season?

<a href='index.php?showuser=1263' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-59'>kit</a>: How well do you think you would have done as the 2C? Do you think Buffalo would have won a game if you were on the second line?

Thank you Brandon, Fish, GeckoeyGecko, Karey, Kit, takethehorizon, and Ragnar for the sigs!
[Image: Pw202QP.jpeg]

Player Page || Update page

Jala · 08-01-2017, 05:12 PM

Task 2:
The Reed Laing
A shot glass half filled with salt and half filled with salt water. Just syrupy enough to choke down. When you finally manage to put up with it long enough to empty the glass, then the bartender walks over with your dog and kicks it. No idea why anyone would want it, but people keep ordering it.

The Ol' Reliable Erikkson
It's a cold 6-pack of your favourite beer. Just like Erikkson, you can always rely on it no matter how dire a situation is.

Banananov Daquiri
A banana daquiri with a touch of strawberry and kiwi and vodka instead of rum. Simple but effective, but don't expect a punch to the jaw when you're drinking it.

Lundberg-er
Two halves of a hamburger bun sandwich two shots of Jack Daniels and a pint of beer. Eat the top piece of bread, slam a shot, guzzle the beer, slam the other shot and eat the other piece of bread. The hardest hitting option on the menu.

Task 3:
The Challenge Cup Finals are here again, and this one should be a barn-burner. The Toronto North Stars and Portland Admirals are both chasing their first Cup wins in their respective club histories. Two opposite ends of the spectrum in that regard as well. The North Stars are an original franchise in the league, while the Admirals are an expansion team coming off a Finals appearance last season.

Both side will be hungry to finally win a championship, with Toronto looking to end their cursed drought.

Offense won't be in short supply this series as both teams are packed to the gills with top notch snipers and playmaking defensemen. Watch for Erikkson for Toronto and Lundberg for the Admirals to make an impact.

Goaltending will be a spectacle in it's own right, as Portland's Wahlgren mans the pipes, and the North Stars having a solid tandem in Harter and Kirkstone. While we'll see a lot of shots and pretty passing plays, don't be surprised if the scores are low in this one.

Task 4:
Kristian Erikkson has to be a shoo in for Playoff MVP. The numbers don't lie and Eriksson has a plethora of them to back up why he should win the MVP.

He played fewer minutes on the second line, yet was tied for top points and goals on the North Stars. He also maximized his effectiveness by notching 7 of his 20 points on the man-advantage and 5 of his 10 goals were game-winners. When you have one player who is not only a huge threat on the power play, but timely with when he scores his goals, you really put fear into the oppositions hearts whenever he steps on the ice.

Add in the fact that he only accrued 2 PIMs whilst doling out 37 hits and his ability to remain in play and be physical while doing so really helps free up the puck for his teammates.

The only blemish is his -3 but with all the other stats in his favour I'd be hard pressed to find a reason to not give it to him.

Task 5:
<a href='index.php?showuser=9' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-54'>raymond3000</a> How does it feel as a career North Star to finally help lead them to the promised land?

<a href='index.php?showuser=2236' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Wally</a> You've fallen in the finals for consecutive seasons now. What do you feel is necessary to push Portland over the hump and win the Cup?

<a href='index.php?showuser=1485' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>RaiN</a> What in your opinion clicked this season to finally get you guys the Cup Toronto's been searching for for so long?

~~formx~~ · 08-01-2017, 05:31 PM

TASK ONE:

I don't like Beau Bent because he sucks and he takes all my ice time away from me. He bullies me all the time because of the color of my skin. Now it is my turn to get revenge. Before the big game on Saturday, I decided I will take revenge on Bent by decorating his car with something he doesn't like. He apparently despises anime a lot despite me catching him once watching Naruto yaoi hentai at 3 AM in the morning. He tryna fuck with me so imma mess up his car. I already got his keys so I will be taking his Mazda RX-7 to the body shop and get it customized with his favorite anime waifus. I know he likes Hatsune Miku so there will be a lot of that on his car for sure. Even the interior will be slapped with anime waifu stickers all over. Don't mess with me dawg.

TASK THREE:
Game 1 Challenge Cup preview Dank Memes edition:

Eh yo so I dunno why I'm writing this but the SHL Challenge Cup Finals for S35 is coming up soon, so the post asked me to write a preview. But this isn't any normal preview for game one. This is the dank preview. The most meme filled team will win game 1 in my opinion.

So first off let's start with the Toronto North Stars. Let's start off slow here. Chris York and Zander Rhys, they are nothing special. They have no meme potential whatsoever. Cynthia Taylor has some meme potential considering she is married to that commie bastard Patrikov Bure. But the real meme dogs of the club are Jeff Kirkstone who knows how to leak private information because he is snek hssssssssssssss. Damien Wert who wants to go out in life controversially in the same manner as Chris Benoit did. Zallerras Szlerchek who despite his efforts of trying to not get haxed is always getting haxed. The lead meme dog of the team is Reed Laing. One who knows how to catfish people, sleep with the competition, and knows how to stir shit. She would be key if Toronto were to win game one.

Now the Portland SADmirals. They have a lineup full of memes. One of the first names I see in their lineup is Thong Bonerstorm. With a name like Thong Bonerstorm you know this is a team destined for greatness. Colin Banning who is famously known as Captain Dad is the king of dad jokes. Samee Iqbal which by the way "iq" IN MY LANGUAGE OF MY PEOPLE OF PUNJABI means 1. and with a name like Iqbal you can expect testicular torsion jokes. Lastly we got the GM and goalie himself, Kyle Wahlgren, the MEME DOG himself, the father of Ben Wahlters, and the meme GM himself that is known to trade players just to keep his own meme alive is huge key for Portland to win game 1.

I think Portland will blow Toronto away in terms of meme potential.

TASK FOUR:

The MVP of these playoffs in my opinion has to be Damien "Krispenwah" Wert. The one who is known as "The Crippler" to many is a fine young physical specimen with a body comparable to that of Hercules or Lex Luger. He is the North Stars top playmaker of the playoffs. He scored 7 goals and 13 assists while being plus 11 and having 0 penalty minutes in the playoffs. He is one of the main prime time players on the powerplay and penalty kill. While his points do not show what he can to on the PK or PP, he has good intangibles and knows how to start an attack. On even strength is where he shines the most. Out of his 20 points in the playoffs, 18 of those came from even strength, 6 of those being goals and 12 of those being assists. While Kristian Eriksson is the better offensive player and some might pick him as the MVP, I think Wert's defensive play cannot be ignored and that is why he is my pick for the playoffs MVP.

TASK FIVE:

<a href='index.php?showuser=2236' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Wally</a> : As the meme dog GM, is there any truth to the rumors that Samee Iqbal and Pedro Sarantez have been traded to the Seattle Riot before the Challenge Cup finals have even started?

<a href='index.php?showuser=32' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>GroupMeIsKindOfOkay</a> How does it feel to face against your former team in the Challenge Cup finals after the controversial manner in which you left? Do you feel you want revenge against Portland?

<a href='index.php?showuser=1571' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-62'>damienj10</a> Are the rumors of your crippling depression and wanted to go out the same way as Chris Benoit did are true?

InciteHysteria · 08-01-2017, 05:38 PM

TASK ONE: Decorate your teammates car for the big game! Can be written or graphic. If written, tell us how you plan on "decorating" your teammates ride before leaving for the viewing party and must be 150 words.

Today we're going to be decorating the ride of one Felix Herzog. I have personally gotten the chance to meet his mom, she's one smoking babe by the way, but today I feel like I'm going to spruce up his car with the sexiest picture of his mother that I can find. Most of the pictures will be pretty tame but I happened to snap a very nice cleavage shot during our European trip. I'm going to plaster that right across the hood. I'm also planning on putting in big green and orange letters, "Swiss Miss" on both sides of his car. We all know that Felix also has a taste for the extravagant and prefers to stay at the nicest most posh places when traveling, often times getting his own room at a different hotel than the rest of the team. So I will be setting up a small motorized chandelier inside the car. I think this car will be the envy of the league and especially the locker room. By the way, Felix's mom is smokin' hot.

TASK THREE: Write a script for the game day preview for Game One of the Finals. Must be at least 150 words.

Join us tonight for the game one of the SHL Finals! We have two overrated teams sporting lucky charms that are out of the WOOOOOOOOOOOORLD. Both these teams were able to get into the playoffs through their powerful usage of voodoo magic and you better be here to see it! Prepare yourself for crushing checks, blood rituals, highlight reel goals, the sacrificing of leprechauns, incredible saves, chanting ominously on the bench, nailbiting overtimes, and team jerseys decorated in ritual symbology! You don't need to take your ipecac because you'll already be on the urge of vomiting! Don't you dare miss game one of the Challenge Cup Finals between the Admirals and North Stars. You'll be on the edge of your seat wondering which of these unloveable losers will take home the Challenge Cup!

Portland Admirals --- Toronto North Stars! BE THERE AT 8PM EASTERN. Only availble on FOX! You know you don't wanna!

TASK FOUR: Who is your choice for the S35 Playoff MVP to this point? Must be 150 words.

Well considering that the finals are over. My choice would definitely be Mark Harter. Harter was traded halfway through the season from the Admirals to guess who? The Toronto North Stars. And while Harter only played three games in the entire playoffs, well, he was the reason the North Stars broke the curse. Earlier in his years with Toronto he struggled to really get anywhere in the playoffs with the North Stars and everyone knew he was frustrated with never being able to close it out in the finals and win a cup. Last year he got run over by Manhattan as Portland lost handily to the Rage. This season he got the call as his former team needed his veteran play to make the comeback in the finals while down 3-1 to the Portland Admirals. As a former player of the Admirals, as of now, he was motivated to make his stand and take that cup back for the North Stars. And his elevated play made it possible for Toronto to break the curse and bring home their championship! Hats off to Harter and his spectacular play in the Finals. My pick for Playoff MVP.

TASK FIVE: Media Day once again! Create three questions, one for three different players in the Challenge Cup and tag them! Playing in the Challenge Cup? Feel free to answer questions for your task or ask three of your own!

Who has the worse smelling goalie gear - you or Harter? And how close are you two now? <a href='index.php?showuser=2245' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-10'>Grapehead</a>

What is it like being a lucky fuck to be able to play in the cup finals as a baby player? <a href='index.php?showuser=2458' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-10'>Symmetrik</a>

Who is the most annoying person in the Portland Locker Room? You're not allowed to say Samee. <a href='index.php?showuser=2378' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-66'>MWHazard</a>

ArGarBarGar · 08-01-2017, 05:43 PM

TASK ONE:
I decorated Flackoâ€™s car for the big game. Why, you ask? Because it is in lame black and it is a mini-van! Nobody likes black mini vans! Those are basically rape vans! So I added a bit of a tune up! I put in some team decals of other teams around the league (in case we wanted to sneak around as another teamâ€™s bus or something), then spraypainted a big green circle because it is a subtle reminder that it is a Chiefs bus, go green! The I added red polka dots to add the red that is in the team logo, and then topped it off with a big spoiler that says GO CHIEFS on it. It looks pretty badass, even though it doesnâ€™t really look like it would be another teamâ€™s bus. Just a Chiefs bus with a bunch of other team logos on it for some reason. I didnâ€™t say I was logical!

TASK THREE:
Game one of the Challenge Cup Finals starts tonight, pitting the Toronto North Stars against the Portland Admirals. The crazy thing about these two teams is neither has won a cup, yet! Portland because they are an expansion team that hasnâ€™t been around for terribly long, and Toronto because they are TERRIBLE! Watch as some great names like Cynthia and Pedro square off in a battle of finesse, strength, and all around ability, and wonder why neither of these teams is the favorite to win because neither of them have won a Challenge Cup! Have I mentioned that yet? Either way, with the Admirals coming back after failing in the finals last year, they are probably going to lose again this year due to them being terrible and a bunch of chokers. The North Stars will probably lose because itâ€™s Toronto. Either way, come tune in at 6 and watch the madness.

TASK FOUR:
My choice for the Challenge Cup MVP is Pedro Sarantez. The big thing that I would point to as to him being my MVP is the fact that he is like the only guy that I know on that team. Other than that, he is a veteran, and veterans always win MVP awards because of their leadership, and Sarantez was leading the team in points at one point. Not sure if he is anymore. But he scores a lot as well, and you need to score goals if you want to win games, something he excels at. Also the Admirals donâ€™t really have anyone else who isnâ€™t being propped up by Sarantez, so if you were going to name an MVP out of that team, you would name Sarantez, no doubt. Even if the Admirals lose I think Sarantez should be the MVP, just because of his history as a competitor in the playoffs.

TASK SIX:
Come to the Challenge Cup viewing party! Featuring special guest Hulk Hogan, who will be calling you brother every second of every day, Seal, the greatest singer in the history of ever, and Alonzo Garbanzo, the greatest player to ever play! Featuring great events such as a dart tournament where you literally throw darts at things and a judge guesses a winner, an LAN party where you play Overwatch because that is what the kids are into, a silent auction, because everybody likes snooty auctions, and finally a literal fighting tournament where guests can fight to the death for prizes! With all these fun events happening, why would you not come to this amazing extravaganza!?

Alonzo Garbanzo Final Tallies (Among Defensemen):
2nd in Goals (208), All-Time Assists Leader (765)*, All-Time Points Leader (973), 3rd in Hits (2587), All-Time Blocked Shots Leader (1882)*
*All-Time Leader Among All Skaters
Player Profile | Update Thread
[Image: IeEV7Iv.png]

grimreaper · 08-01-2017, 06:11 PM

TASK TWO: Pre-Party! Create a drink menu for the arena to sell during the playoff series. Must have four drink specials named after two players each team and have a brief description of each drink! Must be at least 150 words total. If graphic, create a menu that contains four drinks, brief description and price!

Code:
150 words

Patrick Brumm and Coke

Named after the recently acquired Patrick Brumm, this take on a rum and coke is rather heavier on the rum. A triple rum fills a highball glass with a splash of coke and a lime wedge to decorate. Not for the faint of heart.

The Bonerstorm

Though Thorn Bonerstorm isn't a key player for the Admirals, his name is deserving of its own drink. The Bonerstorm ia double Jagerbomb served with a viagra.

Mark Harter Better Faster Stronger

Three different types of rum, lime juice, falernum, Angostura bitters, Pernod, grenadine, cinnamon syrup and grapefruit juice. The perfect start or, if you would prefer, end to an evening of debauchery.

Damien Wert Am I?

1 part Absinthe to 3 parts Champagne. A Death in the Afternoon renamed for the dynamic North Stars' winger. A few of these and you will be asking yourself the very same question.

TASK THREE: Write a script for the game day preview for Game One of the Finals. Must be at least 150 words.

Code:
191 words

Game one of the SHL Challenge Cup Finals is just around the corner, and you do not want to miss out. The Toronto North Stars take on the Portland Admirals in what is sure to be an incredibly hard fought and unforgettable series.

Following a second place finish in the Eastern Conference, the North Stars handily saw off the challenge of the West Kendall Platoon and the New England Wolfpack in only five games apiece. Toronto are firing on all cylinders, and look like a team possessed right now. They have 34 seasons of baggage on their back, will they be able to break the curse they have carried since the SHL's inception?

The Admirals also finished second in their conference, and after seeing off the Los Angeles Panthers in fives games, they overcame a 3-2 series deficit to the Presidents' Trophy winning Calgary Dragons to book their place in the Challenge Cup Finals for the second season running. After a heartbreaking loss to the Manhattan Rage in one of the closest Finals in recent history, can the Admirals go one better this year and finally lift the Challenge Cup?

TASK FOUR: Who is your choice for the S35 Playoff MVP to this point? Must be 150 words.

Code:
172 words

My playoff MVP is Kristian Eriksson of the Toronto North Stars. Playing under 22 minutes a game, Eriksson managed 20 points in his 17 playoff appearances, tied for most in the SHL. He scored 10 goals, good for joint 1st, and his 5 game winning goals also led the league, one of which was the Challenge Cup winning goal. He contributed 4 goals and 4 assists in the Finals, helping the North Stars comeback from a 3-1 series deficit. Eriksson's 1.08 points per 20 minutes was the 3rd best mark in the league, and the highest among all players in the Finals. Though there is competition for the award from Damien Wert, Eriksson's teammate who also scored 20 points in the postseason, as well as recording an impressive +11, and Kyle Wahlgren, who continued his tremendous regular season form to lead the league in save percentage and goals against average in the playoffs, Eriksson's outstanding offensive output and contribution in key games makes him my choice for the playoff MVP.

TASK FIVE: Media Day once again! Create three questions, one for three different players in the Challenge Cup and tag them! Playing in the Challenge Cup? Feel free to answer questions for your task or ask three of your own!

<a href='index.php?showuser=1407' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>PeanutButter</a> Do you believe a Challenge Cup win will be necessary to make the HOF on the first ballot, or have you done enough to make it without?

<a href='index.php?showuser=19' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Jesster</a> With your contract expiring soon, will the outcome of the Finals have an impact on your FA decision?

<a href='index.php?showuser=1432' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-63'>Mark H</a> How does it feel to have the chance to win the Challenge Cup against the team that traded you earlier in the year?

Allegiant · 08-01-2017, 06:54 PM

Task One: The Snitch

Beau Bent hasnâ€™t always been known as one to â€˜roll in styleâ€™, so to speak, but when his car was unknowingly decorated by teammate Winston Windsor, thatâ€™s exactly what happened. Kind of. In honour of his criminal acts against head office that still linger in recent memory, Bentâ€™s car was painted with the likenesses of several main head office members. What was once a beautiful used Honda Civic now bears the faces of Jasper Clayton, Chris Crutchfield, andâ€¦ well, thatâ€™s pretty much it.

Atop the hood of Bentâ€™s car is inscribed a lengthy passage detailing the merits of the current head office, and expressing his deep regret over his actions. In addition to this, a stylized licence plate was somehow registered without his consent, reading: â€œ4TH LNEâ€, memorializing his place on the team in the eyes of the law and automotive registration. To top the entire display off was a soundtrack to â€˜that pony showâ€™, to help Bent usher his newfound love of everything head office.

Task Two: Last Call

The Damien Wert Sniper In honour of now-veteran star Damien Wert, this drink pays homage to his previous team in West Kendall mixed with his current team in Toronto by presenting an extremely smooth, fruity taste: strawberry ice-cream mixed with kahlua, vodka, and a healthy scoop of whipped cream, this drink is so sweet you wonâ€™t even taste the alcohol. Great for break-out seasons, star goal scoring, and getting suspended before your draft day.

The Loyal Harter Mark Harter is a man that perhaps defines the Toronto North Stars, and as such, it only makes sense that he would be honoured with a drink. A stiff, but conservative mix, this is your simple dark beer mixed with some Jack Daniels whiskey. Add a twist of lemon and you have something a little strange, but certainly tasteful and not lacking in kick.

The Brummsplosion This drink is just a mess, and weâ€™re not even going to sugarcoat it. Even if the drink is sugarcoated. This monstrosity is what you get when you mix Smirnoff Ice with cranberry juice, Clamatto juice, lime ice-cream, Baileys, and a dash of season salt. It doesnâ€™t taste very good, but it doesnâ€™t need to, because an extra shot or two of vodka in the mix will get you drunk so fast you wonâ€™t even notice the taste.

The Samee Every drink menu needs its non-alcoholic beverage, and for the Portland side of things, itâ€™s the Samee. A simple fruit juice, the Samee is effectively just Kool-Aid with some added sugar and a fancy cup. Guaranteed to keep you happy for one to two seasons before you need to switch flavours again.

Task Three: Game One Preview

The Portland Admirals have been riding a wave of controversy for several seasons now -- formerly the darling of the league, theyâ€™ve found themselves facing more and more ire from fans and peers alike. Success breeds jealousy, and perhaps thatâ€™s exactly what it is. Now, the Admirals are looking to prove that theyâ€™re every bit as good as they pretend, and that starts with winning their first Challenge Cup. Led by returning star Patrick Brumm, veteran Pedro Sarantez, and the talented Kyle Wahlgren, the new-look Admirals hope to make history tonight.

But theyâ€™re not the only ones looking to make history.

The Toronto North Stars are wading against the tides of the past, trying to overcome their own curse. One of the original SHL franchises, the North Stars have never claimed a Challenge Cup. But now, with the return of Mark Harter, the passing of the torch to Jeff Kirkstone, and the all-star performances of Damien Wert, Kristian Eriksson and Andrey Barbashev, not to mention rookie Chris York, the North Stars look poised to seize their first cup. Fans of each team eagerly await, as after old dynasties have fallen, new ones appear ready to make their own mark on the leagueâ€™s history.

Task Four: MVP: Damien Wert

This is partially bias, but all writers are biased in some ways. Damien Wert and I played together in the SMJHL, so naturally Iâ€™m going to lean towards him when it comes to getting an award. But this bias is backed up with statistics. Wert isnâ€™t the sole claimant of top scorer for the North Stars, but heâ€™s got an edge over Kristian Eriksson. While both have 20 points, and Eriksson has more goals, Wert has played a two-way game more effectively and is a +11, compared to Erikssons -3. Wert also played more time overall, and was one of the key forwards for the team.

This is a bit of a toss-up, as Eriksson and Barbashev both have very valid claims to the title, but Wertâ€™s dynamic offense is enough for me to give him the nod for this one. Itâ€™s close, though -- Eriksson's five game winning goals makes him a tantalizing pick as well, and that statistic is more than enough to overlook something as simple as a minus. You really canâ€™t go wrong here.

storm · 08-01-2017, 06:55 PM

Task 1:

Right before the big viewing party for the S35 SMJHL finals I decided to give my New England teammate a little “pimp my ride” esc decoration. I went to my teammate Brett Kennedy’s car and fiddled with the lock for awhile. Eventually with the help of some other teammates and staff I was able to unlock the door. We then get about 100,000 packing peanuts and stuffed it right inside the car. We didn’t stop there - we also went up onto the sun roof and opened it so we could literally fill the car to capacity. After doing the base of the car, we decided we’d stuff the trunk full as well! Just in case he wanted to bring anything to the viewing party. Right after that beautifully orchestrated little stunt, I went back to Vancouver to play in the big game 1 of the SMJHL finals against the Colorado Mammoths while Kennedy would have to watch on from afar, likely late to the party because of a little packing peanut incident.

Task 2: (this one was actually really fun to do)

The Golden Goal: For this drink you’ll need a simple mix of Goldshlager (½ an ounce to be exact) and Red Bull energy drink (½ an ounce). This is a simple shot which is meant to pump the fans up and should their team win, make them feel like a gold medalist in the olympics.

The Spitfire: The Spitfire is a simple mixing of Orange Juice, Maple Syrup, and the key ingredient… Fireball Cinnamon Whisky! Mix these all together and get a delicious drink that’ll knock your socks off!

The Phelps and Odjick One/Two Punch: This drink isn’t so much a mixed drink but rather two different beverages combined. The One/Two punch is a flute of gluten free German lagers with a French wine pairing. Known to some as a “Smorgasvein”, many consider it to be elegantly cultural.

The Four Star: Simple. We’ll give you a massive glass with a fine beer of your choice for you to chug… Just like the cup winner will be doing!

Task 3:

Welcome to Game One of the S35 SMJHL finals! This year we’re terribly excited to see the Vancouver Whalers and the Colorado Mammoths face off in a battle for the Four Star Cup. This finals matchup was almost inconceivable about a year ago, as the Whalers we’re bottom of the basement only beating the Halifax Raiders in the standings. In a year they picked 1st OA, in which they drafted elite defenceman Isaac Odegard, they were still able to climb back from a tough non-playoff season to pull themselves towards the top of the table. The Mammoths on the other hand have had a similar road to that of last season - middle of the pack with a strong playoff performance. They’re looking to do what they couldn’t last year, they’re looking to win it all and take down what some are calling a “juggernaut” of a Whalers team! Make sure to tune in as we begin Game One of the SMJHL Finals!

Task 4:

The S35 SMJHL Playoff Most Valuable Player has to be Shoyu Kikkoman of the Vancouver Whalers. Kikkoman was arguably the most important part of a weak Vancouver defence in the previous season, and now that the Whalers have added the right pieces Kikkoman has been able to be the #1 man for them and dominate. Kikkoman is something of a two-way defense man, he’s very sound in his own end, demonstrated by his +/- of +4 and having thrown 18 hits during the playoffs. However, on the other end of the ice he’s a monster. Kikkoman has put together an incredible playoff run which consists of 5 goals and 10 assists in a meer 9 games played. That’d an incredible point total for a defense man. He’s been an absolute weapon on the Vancouver power play, which has really allowed him to become the “quarterback” of the team. Overall Kikkoman is easily the MVP as he’s been offensively dominate and defensively sound in his playoff run thus far.

Task 5:

<a href='index.php?showuser=2572' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-66'>DrunkenTeddy</a> - How has this playoff run shaped you as a player? Has it shown Hamilton you’re ready for the jump?
<a href='index.php?showuser=2583' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-17'>QuantumCowboy</a> - How does being the captain shift the dynamic of playing the game for you?
<a href='index.php?showuser=1159' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-56'>prettyburn</a> - How does being the 1st OA pick for the Whalers affect you going into the SMJHL Finals? Do you feel you have expectations to live up too?

Jepox · 08-01-2017, 06:58 PM

Code:
TASK EIGHT: Design the Championship Banner for the S35 Challenge Cup. Must include team logo, team name and at least one render.

RIP didn't make it for all of them

bozzz · 08-01-2017, 07:06 PM

- Task 2 -

The China White -- an innocuous looking concoction that has way more bite than bark; sambuca, vodka, in shot of strained ice water, over a cube of burnt sugar.

Lidstrom's Last Stand -- glass of stout poured on top of two fingers of brandy, with two shots of whisky to drop into the glass before drinking; served with a hammer to hit yourself in the foot with after.

The Texas Defense -- a glass of whole milk.

Abes Armpit -- a dirty gin martini with durian puree, which if not consumed within 60 seconds of ordering comes with a $50 surcharge because you're an asshole.

Cody Black Russian -- whisky, coffee liqueur, Malibu, maraschino cherries, in a high ball glass rimmed with salt after being dipped in a pool of your fans' tears.

Snuffalupagus · 08-01-2017, 07:30 PM

TASK ONE: Decorate your teammates car for the big game! Can be written or graphic. If written, tell us how you plan on "decorating" your teammates ride before leaving for the viewing party and must be 150 words.

I always see Banning running around, screaming Rorschach-ish nonsense â€“ something about killing something â€“ and I think Iâ€™ve found the perfect way to get back at him while also hyping up game seven of our Challenge Cup Finals.

Hereâ€™s what Iâ€™m thinking: You know how Banning really likes comics or cartoons or whatever he likes? Well, how about I spray paint Vampirella onto his hood? You know, like that big boob vampire lady? Iâ€™m sure thatâ€™s a thing. Anyway. I think it would really grind his gears to see his precious ride tampered with.

Of course Iâ€™ll throw in some Admiral-related nincompoopery to make sure the fans understand some of the insiders. Like maybe put Wally squished betwixt the two boobs of the â€˜pire. Thatâ€™s what Iâ€™m thinking at least. I just want to see the look on Banningâ€™s face.

And fans love boobs, so win-win, right!? Well, I guess kids might not like it. But fuck kids.

TASK TWO: Pre-Party! Create a drink menu for the arena to sell during the playoff series. Must have four drink specials named after two players each team and have a brief description of each drink! Must be at least 150 words total. If graphic, create a menu that contains four drinks, brief description and price!

Admirals:
Wahlgrening Ear-to-Ear. Kyle Wahlgren will has always had a taste for young blood, so for this drink, weâ€™re gathering a couple pints of Samee Iqballâ€™s hemoglobin and pouring it into a shot that is two-parts A+ and three-parts vodka infused skin.

Veliâ€™s Cabbage Time. Veli Kaalinpaa doesnâ€™t speak much English, and neither does his drink. Itâ€™s some Russian Prince vodka with old, boiled cabbage water mixed in for a perfect combination of failure and failure. Although Veli himself is a godsend and he is no failure. I love you.

Northstars
Zander Rhysonings. Have you wondered why they call it Three Olives Vodka but you donâ€™t usually garnish vodka-ized drinks with three olives? Zander Rhys knows exactly why, but heâ€™ll never let on. Heâ€™s got his rhysonings. Gosh thatâ€™s a stretch pun.

Kristian Erikssonâ€™s Sonâ€™s Son. Itâ€™s no doubt that that Swedish meatball Eriksson has his very own litter of children â€“ probably enough to field a AAA baseball team. If thereâ€™s something children love, itâ€™s milk. So this drink has a little bit of Erikssonâ€™s own personal seed, some unpasteurized milk, and a couple drops of â€“ you guessed it â€“ VODKA.

TASK THREE: Write a script for the game day preview for Game One of the Finals. Must be at least 150 words.

This story has been told many times, but never quite like this. For a combination of 30+ seasons, both teams â€“ the Admirals and the Northstars â€“ have gone their franchise histories without a single cup between them.

The Northstars have been to the dance many times, usually tangling with the Wolfpack or the Blizzard. So far, theyâ€™ve never come out on top. This year, they have many pieces. One of the more recent acquisitions is goalie Mark Harter. While Jeff Kirkstone has backstopped the Northstars through most of the playoffs, Harter has been waiting in the wings.

Portlandâ€™s journey is slightly more fresh. As an S25 expansion team, theyâ€™ve seen little action. Now is their chance as they make a repeat showing at the finals of the Challenge Cup. With the acquisition of Patrick Brumm, a scoring touch is in the hands of the Admirals. Can they capitalize? Letâ€™s find out at Game One of the Challenge Cup Finals!

TASK FOUR: Who is your choice for the S35 Playoff MVP to this point? Must be 150 words.

Itâ€™s a tough choice to make. There have been a lot of important players to their teams and teammates. Although he didnâ€™t play many of the games for his team, I think the MVP for this S35 playoffs should be Mark Harter. The man has worked tirelessly, mercilessly, and vigorously to improve himself and bring his team to the Challenge Cup finals. Down 3-1 after the first four games, Toronto went under a massive line overhaul.

Game 5 saw success. Followed by Game 6 success. And Game 7, as we all know, went to the Northstars.

While Jeff Kirkstone was strong in the season and post-season, the Northstars knew to turn to the veteran Mark Harter.

Harter, a former Admiral himself (one season removed), proved to be too much for the Admirals. And for that reason, I believe Harter should be recognized as playoff MVP! A strong backstop is what creates championships.

Navigation

Extra Menu

About us