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Nobody · 10-12-2018, 08:54 AM

10-12-2018, 04:37 AMSnussu Wrote: @Nobody

Contract Clause

Every time i score a goal, i will get pay raise of 100$, unless it was assisted by goaltender in wich case the pay raise should be 1,000$

Sweet. I'm happy to provide a pay rise of $0

10-12-2018, 07:57 AMCptSquall Wrote: @Nobody

Contract Clause:
*If Physt's contract is deemed too expensive as to inhibit the ability to acquire higher paid players, you may remove up to 1.5 Million from this contract in order to assist in improving the team.

Who do you think I am! @Wally?

10-12-2018, 08:52 AMNobody Wrote: @Nobody

Bob Bergen requires a Kettle to be supplied in the locker room during every game and training session. It must be freshly boiling for the start of the intermission. In addition to this Bergen must be supplied weekly with a box of Yorkshire Tea Gold.

Deal! Easiest contract negotiations ever.

***bluesfan55*** · 10-12-2018, 09:01 AM

Clause #1
If Lombardi has less than 10 penalty minutes and finishes the season without a fight, he is given the nickname “Weak-Ass Loser” due to his short stature, clean play, and lack of pugnaciousness.

ty to @High Stick King @EvilAllBran and @Ragnar for the sigs

*Flowseidon* · 10-12-2018, 09:02 AM

Having spent my junior career in Montreal, there are some things that have come very near and dear to my heart. Now, being that San Fransisco is far away, it will be very hard for me to access my favourite meal. Steamies and Poutine from La Belle Province.

The San Francisco Pride will have to furnish me with the needed hot dogs so that I can go on to be a successful SHL player otherwise I don't know if I'll be able to adapt to the San Francisco lifestyle.

goilers · 10-12-2018, 09:26 AM

My second contract I signed with the Panthers had a few clauses, such as if I were to win an award I would get a bonus and Wasty had to make me a new signature. Well my next contract will include whenever I score a goal with the Los Angeles Panthers, they will feature a dog on the jumbo tron that needs to be adopted at the game.The person who adopts the dog will get a meet and great with Reflieux, Watcher and Bennett.

BarnabasCollins · 10-12-2018, 09:28 AM

@Steelhead77

Kata Vilde is one of the rare hockey players who is a 2 sport star. The first clause that needs to be entered is that :Vilde is free to pursue to pursue a career in professional wrestling during the offseasons without affecting his status as a Calgary Dragon.

The 2nd clause that must be entered is an unlimited supply of Slim Jims must be available in the locker room at all times.

Rabidsponge21 · 10-12-2018, 09:29 AM

@.bojo

I know your not GM anymore, but I would still require at least 1 new WKP gif per season I sign to add to the fantastic collection we already have. Without that, it's a no deal. That and BOJO BOX UPDATED!

Raven · 10-12-2018, 09:39 AM

Rafe Ulrch new contract clause will include that his father is given, a job within the staff (helping where he can) of any club he is currently contracted too.

Thank you Fever, sköldpaddor and OD for the amazing sigs!

Montreal Impact/Militia Militia-Old

|Player Page| Stars

|Update Page| Japan

***Ace*** · 10-12-2018, 09:40 AM

Tigole Bitties gets uninhibited access to every minifridge in his teammates' hotel rooms on roadie games. This is mandatory and not negotiable. Every. Road. Trip. No exeptions.

mstuk41 · 10-12-2018, 09:49 AM

*From the time the season ends, until the beginning of training camp - DO NOT CONTACT ME - I am on Phish Tour, slinging veggie burritos, and indulging in all things Phish. During the season I'm on your time. The OFFSEASON is MY Time.

**.bojo** · 10-12-2018, 09:55 AM

When contract clause comes to down we set out cookies with pen and paper by the chimney. We have a list of possible clauses I'd like to include, and overnight he's allowed to eat one cookie for each clause he includes. It's the only way I'll get my wish to replace my helmet with a raccoon hat.

hewasajazzman · 10-12-2018, 09:59 AM

“beer.”
...beer?
“yes, beer.”
that... thats all you want us to write? just.. “beer”? nothing else?
“...”
alright mr. kastrba, here is your contact with the very DEMANDING clause of “beer”. please just initial here, here, and... here. sign here.

jesus christ.

caltroit_red_flames · 10-12-2018, 10:00 AM

The short answer...
Brady would have asked for Oreos a long time ago, but now he'd demand that at least 2 people from the team create a player in a new hockey league that heard is going to be announced publicly very soon. Brady heard that his cousin is going to be joining the league and wanted to have friends to watch the games with, so if other Edmonton players have friends or family in it he'll have someone to watch it with!

The long answer...
My oh my, do I have a story about this... Ladies and gentlemen let me start by saying that I know for a fact Brady McIntyre loves Oreos. They've been the bane of his existence since becoming a professional hockey player, and it all started with his general manager who was doing Brady a favor when he didn't even know it.

Flash back to the draft and Brady is taken 5th overall in the S39 SHL entry draft by the Edmonton Blizzard. General managers @karlssens and @Ace are ecstatic that their guy has fallen to them and want to iron out a deal as soon as they can. Being new to the world of professional hockey, Brady had believed he could ask for anything in his contract, monetary compensation or otherwise. So he comes to the table and sits down. Ace, who is negotiating the contract wants to get straight to business. He offers a 2 year deal with an AAV of 2.5 million. To counter Brady asks for a modified NTC and 3 years instead of 2. Ace states that he wants to keep Brady as an RFA but is happy to add the NTC. So the deal is nearly agreed upon. Then this:

[Image: xJgOvjk.png]

One would generally expect this to mean that the new term was agreed upon and everything was in order, correct? Well, apparently it wasn't seen that way. Brady came back to the Blizzard front office the next day to find a contract without any Oreo clause. It had to be a mistake, right? They had just agreed to the contract yesterday.

Brady McIntyre: "Ace what is this? Where's my Oreo clause?"

Ace: "Oh that was serious? Brady this is a legitimate business, we can't just go around adding silly clauses to our contracts. We're giving you 5 million dollars, I'm sure you can buy all the Oreos you want with that."

Brady McIntyre: "That may be so, but we agreed to it. It's a simple request, have someone mail me a box of Oreos once a month and I'll sign."

Ace: "And what am I supposed to tell the guys upstairs? 'Hey @Allegiant I need you to sign off on this expense report, it's that time of the month again...'. Look kid you're a great prospect, but I'm not letting you bully us into giving you some goofy clause that could cause your contract to be void because we forgot send you a box of cookies on accident. Sign the deal."

Brady walked out of the office feeling pretty annoyed, why was it such a big deal. He called him mom to talk about it and essentially she told him that Ace was doing him a favor by getting him off the sugary clumps of processed creme sandwiches. Brady swallowed his pride and walked back into the room where Ace was stuck facepalming and wondering why he had to deal with this crap. Brady signed the deal and looked at Ace then said "I know for a fact I could have gotten more money. It would've been so easy to give me what I wanted."

Brady left the room begrudgingly. But now he can't stand Oreos. He's lost a lot of fat that he got from eating them and gained muscle by replacing that part of his diet with chicken, so it looks like it all worked out in the end.

GeckoeyGecko · 10-12-2018, 10:00 AM

Tokek Takshak has a clause in his contract where Jax Aittokallio has to carry him to any house parties held by any players on the team.

Jax is also forbidden from mentioning the Ottawa Senators. Ever.

caltroit_red_flames · 10-12-2018, 10:01 AM

10-12-2018, 09:59 AMhewasajazzman Wrote: “beer.”
...beer?
“yes, beer.”
that... thats all you want us to write? just.. “beer”? nothing else?
“...”
alright mr. kastrba, here is your contact with the very DEMANDING clause of “beer”. please just initial here, here, and... here. sign here.

jesus christ.

Brett?

[Image: addiction-recovery-ebulletin-kavanaugh-l...59x350.jpg]

hewasajazzman · 10-12-2018, 10:06 AM

10-12-2018, 10:01 AMcaltroit_red_flames Wrote:
10-12-2018, 09:59 AMhewasajazzman Wrote: “beer.”
...beer?
“yes, beer.”
that... thats all you want us to write? just.. “beer”? nothing else?
“...”
alright mr. kastrba, here is your contact with the very DEMANDING clause of “beer”. please just initial here, here, and... here. sign here.

jesus christ.

Brett?

hey. we like beer just like everyone else, dont you know?

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