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DeletedAtUserRequest · 03-03-2019, 07:48 AM

THIS PT IS FOR SHL PLAYERS AND SEND DOWNS. IT IS NOT FOR SMJHL ROOKIES.

SHL Cribs is back! And it's still your one-stop shop for living vicariously through others! In fact, it's the only place where you can get a tour of your favorite hockey players pad and be jealous of everything they have! Yes, get ready for another sizzling season of boom-boom bedrooms, tricked out rides and refrigerator raids. Spend your time daydreaming about how the other half lives. This season, no SHL player is safe from our prying eyes, as we'll be snooping on everyone from SMJHL rookies making the league minimum to SHL superstars with an unlimited bank roll! You'll get to learn everything you ever wanted to know about your favorite players, and maybe a few things you wish you didnt.

Task: in 150 words or more, give SHL Cribs a tour of your place! Where is it? How big is it? what's in it? does it have amenities or special features? how about the cars?? and of course most importantly.. what's in your fridge!

Graphic: Show us a graphic of your crib or your favorite part of your crib.. which should include a title, your players name, the location and 5 bullet points of information about your crib that we should know about it.

You will receive 3 capped TPE for fulfilling all requirements.
This PT will close Sunday March 10 at 10 PM EST.

Welfare claims are accepted! *if you’re claiming welfare and have a different username on the affiliates site then you need to state that in your post to get credit.*

Any questions/concerns, please PM me.
Note: Tasks with malicious intent will not be graded.

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Baelor Swift · 03-03-2019, 09:32 AM

Who lives in a piece of turd on the side of the street? POOP - ITT - Y - SCOOP!
Amazing defenseman and goat like is he? POOP - ITT - Y - SCOOP!

From the outside, Poopity Scoop's house just looks like a giant turd with a door and some windows. However, one step into his fecal abode and you'll see his house is truly the shit! Upon entrance, you'll be shocked a well well-lit glimmering hallway filled with jewels from the nooks and crannies of the earth, a hall fit for royalty. And then you will see a door at the end of the hallway. When you try to open it and you are unexpected, poop will fall on your face. So you best get an invitation from Poopity Scoop before coming!

Enter and you will be greeted by a staircase going down. And wow oh wow. This is where the magic happens. You are met by a majestic living area with a giant projector, beautiful couches, and clear bowls full of shelled pistachios. And you sit down for just a second but then... Then you will fall asleeppppppp.

gordieboom · 03-03-2019, 09:59 AM

My beautiful crib is located in Ballwin, a southwestern suburb of St.Louis. It is located next to a spectacular golf course where i like spending out some time with my golf friends in my free time. It has a brickstone construction and a traditional architectural style. The house size is pretty big with approx. 4500 square feet. It has four bedrooms, three bathrooms, a large indoor swim spa room, a separate dining room and a state of the art kitchen. But my favorite room is my private cinema that has a capacity for 10 people. Furthermore the house has 3 garages, but i have used only one at the moment. As it is widely known i am owning a nissan micra N-sport. In my american fridge there is only room for very healthy products. A couple of products that are not missing are some fresh sandwich-spread and offcource the delicious cumin cheese from Gouda.

dizzyDC · 03-03-2019, 10:28 AM

Hey what's up, I'm Louie Garrett forward for the Texas Renegades and welcome to my crib. I live downtown in a high rise apartment building right near the rink so it's super convenient to get to our games. It's pretty nice that I have a balcony in which I get a really nice view of the city. Nothing quite like chilling out there after a game with a cold beer. In terms of the inside of my apartment, I honestly don't have anything too fancy going on. It's really not that big, but it's enough space to be comfortable in. Just got the basics in the kitchen and nothing too exciting because we always have the team nutritionist breathing down our necks although I do like to sneak some nice fatty bacon up here every now and then. I guess the coolest thing I have is my collection of guitars signed by Pearl Jam and the Foo Fighters from my time playing in Seattle. I own a Tesla down in the garage, but I hardly ever drive to be totally honest just because everywhere I really need to go is so close by.

Carbine · 03-03-2019, 10:40 AM

You would assume that Alex Andani has a ballin' crib - especially given the fat contract he's had the past few seasons - but no. He has a compulsive partying problem which has left his living allowance at a fraction of what other players typically have and it definitely shows. While most of the New Orleans Specters roster live in high-rise condos just blocks from the arena and the higher paid stars in private residences in the nice part of town, Andani lives among the fans in a rental unit - just a one bedroom flat. The unit isn't anything special: stainless steel appliances, new carpets, and underground parking to boot. Being a rental property, Andani just has the one car - an original Tesla Roadster. He bought it when he first entered the league - a taste of prestige - before he discovered thumping techno and copious amounts of alcohol. The fridge isn't anything much, just Gatorade and beer. A true bachelor pad and AA is content with the simple life he's currently living as a professional hockey player.

179 words

efiug · 03-03-2019, 12:12 PM

Petr Mikulak stays in an apartment in Vancouver. It's not the largest place but it has everything he needs. He doesn't keep a lot of stuff around but he definitely has the essentials. Here are some of Petr's favourite objects around his house.

1.) Fridge: Every young bachelor wants a fridge, in fact I'd be as bold to say that they need a fridge. Why? You may ask? because a fridge not only stores you food but it keeps it cool. And everyone knows Petr is a cool guy, that's why he has a fridge.

2.) Table and Chairs: Now don't listen to those haters who don't think chairs and table are useless because obviously they serve the great and amazing purpose of sitting around and not doing that much while you put stuff on it and sometimes you use it for food but that is besides the point.

3.) Towels: Good large towels keep you dry in situations where you become wet. For Example taking a shower is really hard if you have no towel with which to dry yourself then you would be wet. Nobody wants to be wet.

StadiumGambler · 03-03-2019, 01:39 PM

Hey guys, this is Nick Brain, and welcome to my billet's crib!

*crappy dubstep plays*

We're in a neighborhood that probably doesn't exist in Denver, with a nice scenic mountain view over a lot of the city. Hey look, we can see the rink from here! InGen Arena, home of the Colorado Raptors!

My billets are very successful people, they work in warehousing, and they're regular season ticket holders and billets for the Raptors. They take care of me cause my parents are in Calgary and I needed a place to stay, and boy, is this place awesome or what?

https://images.adsttc.com/media/images/5...1410479267

You might see the sedan poking around the wall over here but thats not my car, my car is right here. Nice weird little SUV slash van slash station wagon hybrid thingy. Doesn't get the best gas mileage, but it seats the population of a small town, so I can use it to bring a bunch of the boys over to practise.

Now lets take a tour of the house shall we?

*quick tour ensues, nice bedrooms and bathrooms are shown off, balcony with a great view of wildlife, etc*

And here, we got my own personal mini-fridge, very important. Here we have the leftovers from a roast beef dinner I cooked for the rookies last night. We got the beast, some roast potatoes, honeyed carrots. Over here I've got some chicken parm sliders that I'm gonna heat up in the oven soon, that'll be the snack for the guys I'm driving to practise. Figured I do chicken parm sliders as a tribute to the legend Esa Anrikkanen. We got the sports drinks in the side, and theres some ground beef in the small freezer compartment, I'm using that to make some burgers on the balcony grill later. I'm quite the cook, it just feels right to be making my own food whenever I can.

And now we have my room, pretty basic, just the essentials. Bed, comfy chair, desk, TV, video game consoles, Winnipeg Jets poster, two pictures of me holding the draft jerseys, and of course, the piece de resistance......Qanba fightstick video game controller. Don't try to beat scrubs in Street Fighter without it.

*Action shot of Nick's Dan Koryuken-ing the holy hell out of a cameraman's Ryu ensues, followed by Nick doing the traditional victory dance before putting the cameraman in a headlock and giving him the pain in real life too.*

Alright well thats my crib, now I have to keep with the Cribs tradition and tell you as meanly as possible to get the hell off my property.......... before I unleash the hounds.

*Cameraman laughs, then the shot cuts to him being chased by the hounds and nom nom nommed on as the Cribs logo flashes over the bloody carnage that enuses.*

Trautner · 03-03-2019, 01:57 PM

Michael Scarn's crib is super awesome. He lives in a nice apartment in Denver with his wife Holly and his many, many kids. Michael Scarn always keeps his Dundie awards in plain sight for all the guests to see. He also has a huge flatscreen plasma TV bolted onto the wall. Sometimes he will just stand there and watch TV for hours. Michael Scarn also has many plaques and newspaper articles framed on his wall. The newspaper clippings describe Michael Scarn's huge number of accomplishments as both an agent and as a regional manager of Dunder Mifflin. Scarn saved the NBA All Star Game, the MLB All Star Game, and of course most famously the NHL All Star Game from terrorist plots by the nefarious villain Goldenface. Scarn also has a nice certificate that certifies him as the proud owner of an authentic Seyko timepiece. Scarn also has a nice neon sign he got that he hangs in the dining room above the dinner table. Michael Scarn's mug, "World's Best Boss" is always broadly on display on the kitchen counter of his crib.

**JamesT** · 03-03-2019, 02:44 PM

Hey SHL cribs thanks for stopping by my condo in downtown Montreal!

It is a one bedroom apartment with a single washroom, a living room, a kitchen, one bedroom and a balcony to see beautiful montreal. My condo apartment is 800 square feet which fits around the average size for condo's. I don't need that much space for living and the space is suffice for me. There is a gaming computer which i got a few months in the off season and it helps me unwind after a long day of practice or if i want to hangout with friends online. With the season in full swing i don't spend too much time on it anymore.

Now onto what is in my fridge and to nobody's surprise it is full of asian food such as fried rice, dumplings, vietnamese sandwiches and other asian food! This is the sort of food i grew up with so it only makes sense i continue eating it, since it helps me remind of home. I currently drive a 2018 Mazda 3 which i use to drive to practice, to the game, or to hangout with friends.

So that pretty much wraps up my SHL cribs tour so thank you again for stopping by! Now get out of here (as in tradition with the Cribs TV shows)

GeckoeyGecko · 03-03-2019, 03:06 PM

Tokek Takshak has made leaps and strides since his days in Vancouver. He no longer lives in a party room under the Whalers stadium, no, now he has a party room under the Rage stadium. Don't be mean, he's pretty proud of it. Inside, there are such amenities such as a positively ancient computer, a sizeable fridge, and a large terrarium full of sneks and gecks. Tokek is quite happy with his sneks and gecks, they're probably his most prized possession.

Cars? Tokek doesn't actually own one. He has one of those razer scooters, you know, the ones that hurt like hell when they smash into your ankle. I mean, he doesn't need to drive anywhere, he just sorta walks up the stairs and bam he's in the arena. The airport is, apparently, well within scooter distance.

Inside the fridge there are a lot of frozen mice for his sneks, as well as leftover pot roast.

ImShiny · 03-03-2019, 03:13 PM

David Vent lives in a very quiet neighborhood by himself in Kelowna. His two-story blue house is accented to a very small family-owned restaurant that he visits frequently. Walking into the house you are greeted by a staircase going to the second floor and to the left is the living room and to the right is Vent's game room. Inside Vent's game room he has all his video game needs. In the living room, is a nice 64-inch television and nice leather seats and a couch for Vent to relax and watch movies with his friends when they come over. Connected to the living room is a kitchen. The fridge is packed with all kinds of food. From various fruits and veggies to turkey and chicken. Going through a door you will walk into a small weight room with a bench press, multiple small weights, and a squat bar that Vent frequents often. Going upstairs to the right is Vent's bedroom which is painted blue and has many posters on the walls. From movies to bands the walls are covered. Going left from the staircase you will walk into a bathroom with a huge tub and also a walk in shower. There is a banister that you can overlook that looks into the kitchen that also has a fireman pole to slide down for quick access. Outback of the house Vent has an inground pool and a small hockey rink for Vent to practice shooting (doesn't seem to be working). Exciting the house you will see Vent's prized Tesla Model 3. Thank you coming out to check out Vent's Crib.

Nerio · 03-03-2019, 03:51 PM

Bobby Sharp lives with his brother Fred Sharp and their two friends Pete Smith and Jack Olsen, in a quiet neighborhood in the outskirts of Minneapolis Minnesota. The house was the Sharp's parents, who decided to move away from the cold once Bobby graduated high school and sold it to Fred on the cheap. Immediately when walking in, you'll likely notice the projector TV screen shining on the wall, and the wide variety of game systems hooked up to it. Upstairs and down the hall to the right, you'll find the master suite where Bobby Sharp calls home. He used to have a bedroom on the first floor but bribed his brother for a swap after signing his big contract with Buffalo. His room has a computer where he battles with his Apex addiction a bit. The most prominent feature about the entire house though is in the backyard if you happen to stop by during the winter. Bobby and Fred's dad built an outdoor rink in their backyard when Bobby and Fred were young, and they continue to maintain it. Bobby is where he is today in part because of that rink.

[Image: se3o7UC.jpg]

LarksTongue · 03-03-2019, 03:55 PM

Commander Shepard's crib is his one and only; Normandy SR-2. After going through the wormhole that sent Shepard back in time, he landed in Manitoba in the middle of nowhere, somewhere close to the Nunavut territory. Shepard flies the SR-2 directly to arenas. The SR-2 is quite large but it doesn’t fit the mold of a conventional crib. The SR-2 has 5 decks and a built in AI for ship and everyday assistance. Shepard’s room is at the top of the ship. It has a giant aquarium filled with alien fish. Shepard also retrofitted a hockey rink into the hanger allowing him to practice at any point. Shepard does not have many cars but has his trusty all terrain Mako. Terrible at handling but it gets Shepard where he needs to go. Shepard also has a smaller transport ship to fly anywhere he wants. The Normandy SR-2 has its very own chef and kitchen. It is supplied with anything from Turian food all the way to a good ol burger. Shepard has also taken a keen interest in Beaver Tails, and Poutine as he parks the Normandy north of Montreal during the season.

Thanks to @FlappyGiraffe and @ToeDragon84 for the making these sick sigs!

Quote: First Goal (3rd Game): Commander Shepard 1 (Nick Brain 1, Noah Gallagher 2) at 8:48

Kalakar · 03-03-2019, 03:59 PM

With his newly acquired 5M contract from the SHL, Matt Kholin purchased his first ever home. A beautiful contemporary villa 10 minutes away from the Barracuda arena. The luxurious villa boasts an amazing open plan living area, abundance of natural light thanks to floor to ceiling windows. The house is eco-friendly, built with energy efficient heating and cooling systems, solar panels, and underfloor heating. The modern style design continues outside where Matt and his guests will be able to enjoy a pre-heated infinity swimming pool that borders a relaxing area with couches and a fireplace. The villa is already purchased and paid for, but unfortunately Kholin will have to wait before enjoying his new place in the sun. Indeed, he still has at least one season to spend in the cold in Halifax, where he's been living in a 3 stars hotel facing the Raiders arena. The sun will definitely do him some good once he moves up to the big league.

CanadianDuck · 03-03-2019, 05:02 PM

When you think of the home of a hockey player, you imagine large houses, big windows, fancy cars, and a lot of other crazy expensive things. This is not the way San Francisco Pride rookie Steven Moyer lives. Steven rents a nice looking home outside of San Francisco. Inside you will find the typical items you would find in a young players living area. A big screen TV, an impressive gaming setup for streaming in the offseason, an elaborate bed and bathroom, and a kitchen that would blow many away. The home looks over the vast Pacific Ocean where Steven enjoys watching the sunset with his dog Spike, a young pug puppy Steven adopted when he first arrived in California. The quiet location fits the laid back demeanor the young player exhibits in his own life. "I enjoy spending my time away from the glitz and glamour that hockey brings, having my family and friends over and enjoying life away from all the craziness is very relaxing."

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