11-04-2016, 09:23 PM
Code:
Sure, go ahead and grade - 4,669 wordsI feel dirty just writing that title, but I'm bored at work. Ask me questions and I will start answering them when I get off. We'll probably keep this running throughout the weekend. Have fun!
<a href='index.php?showuser=1959' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-10'>dankoa</a>: Good feeling to be Detroit's top boy this season?
For the most part, it was a good feeling. I must admit, I was hoping to at least match my goal production from S30 and failed to do that, but there were enough positives in other aspects of my game to help me feel a little better. It was still pretty cool to be considered one of the top dogs on the team.
Which of our rooks is your bet to be the best candidate to fill the ztevans shaped hole our roster's gonna have next year?
If I had to pick one, I’d probably take Kyle Kylrad. He was just unbelievably good at times this season, and almost broke my team record for goals in a rookie season. There’s lots of talent in that rookie crop, though. Detroit is going to be a hell of a team in S32, even if it’s possible (likely?) that I’m not part of it.
Looking back, how successful an impact do you feel Detroit's S30 draft class had on the team's fortunes?
You can’t say enough about the role the S30 SMJHL draft class had on this team. Obviously, you had me and Metzler leading the charge. Alexis led the team in scoring for most of the season until I realized what I’m actually supposed to be aiming for with my 200+ shots. Even though he wasn’t “our” draft pick, bringing in Joey Ryan really helped spur the first line. And people will shit on MayTee for going inactive as our first-rounder, but he’s a damn good 250 TPE defenseman who still had 27 points this season. Really, the only thing that would have made it better would have been to have at least one more season with Cikgnar Konstantinov, but I guess that wasn’t meant to be.
<a href='index.php?showuser=1157' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Bojo</a>: Does stormy frown upon you when you eat those hot dogs
Stormy never frowns. Seriously, look at his face. Even when the Carolina Hurricanes are blowing three-goal leads, he’s just always smiling like a maniac. The smile hasn’t left his face despite the Canes missing the playoffs for almost the entirety of the Obama administration. No ice hog should smile that much about anything. It actually creeps me out a little bit.
And speaking of creepy, why is Stormy watching me eat hot dogs? What the hell is up with that? Shouldn’t he be sounding the hurricane siren? Or banging against the boards and leading fans in a “Let’s Go Canes” chant? Snapping photos with little kids? I’d even settle for him trying to replace Cam Ward in net. Just please stop watching me eat hot dogs, you weirdo.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2285' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-17'>Tomen</a>: Do you think you will have good chances of winning ROTY next season?
Hell no. Assuming I’m called up - which seems to be the case at this point - I’ll probably be a third or fourth liner with limited ice time. The Rookie of the Year is probably going to be somebody like Conklin Owen, Jean-Luc Reflieux, Steven Stamkos, Jr. or Kelly Rivet.
Against which team would you like to score your first SHL career goal?
Eh, I don’t think I have a preference in this. I could make an argument for several teams. Obviously, Calgary comes to mind with our rivalry. Toronto would be neat, since that likely means I’d be scoring on my Russian comrade - and one of the league’s best - in Mark Harter. If it comes against a team starting a fellow S31 draftee, that would also be pretty cool. Like, maybe Hamilton? So we’ll see. I could come up with an argument for any of them.
When will the make
the playoffs again?I don’t think the Jets are that far off. The top forwards are still pretty young, and we drafted a bunch of forwards to build depth in the last draft. Our defensemen may be hitting regression, but guys like Manious still have a couple of quality seasons in them. And Lukas Berger has probably been overshadowed by some of the other younger goalies in the league after a down season, but he’s still going to be our top goalie for many seasons to come and will only improve.
So ... S34? That might seem optimistic to some, especially considering how this season went, but I think S33 might even be possible. We’ll see.
Will you score for team
again?Hopefully! My goal scoring has taken a bit of a dip this season since I’m playing a more all-around game, and I think Russia will be looking for more of that complete game from me than pushing me to contribute by scoring. If it happens, it happens, but it’s not going to be a priority. Just doing what it takes to help Russia bring home the gold.
Will Volkova score for team
?Yes. I give Volks shit all the time, but she’s breaking through in this tournament. Bank on it.
How many points do you think will you get(SHL)?
I think an attainable target will be 10 points. I know some other rookies had more productive seasons in S31, and that, oh, 15 or so would be possible, even 20 if I have a stellar season. But I think 10 is a realistic target I can aim for.
How far can the
go in the playoffs this season?We can win it all, honestly. I mean, look at Prince George last season. Anything is possible. With that said, in order to win the Four Star Cup, I’m going to have to score more goals. So I guess it’s up to me, huh? Especially after not scoring in last season’s playoffs, I’m very hungry for my first postseason goal. Hopefully I’ll get a lot more than just that one.
Which team will win the west?(SHL and SMJHL)
I think Calgary wins the West in the SHL. I know it’s a chalk pick, but they’ve just got such a great team, with great goaltending. I can’t bet against them, as much as I’d like to do so. As far as the SMJHL ... like, what do I care? Either I’m going to have to beat them or I’ll be out of the playoffs by the time we see them. I’ll pick Colorado for, uh, sentimental reasons, but in reality I’ve got other shit to take care of, you know?
Which team is your favorite for the Cup?(SHL & SMJHL)
Calgary and Detroit. YOLO.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2274' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-17'>Rabidsponge21</a>: How do you feel always playing in your brother Jach's Shadow?
Poor <a href='index.php?showuser=2045' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>SabresFan</a> makes one typo and now I’m going to be Jach Evans forever. At least y’all are talking about my long-lost brother now, instead of my sister.
Do you find yourself feeling more or less Deplorable now that the season is over?
On one hand, I feel less deplorable because the Deplorables haven’t been remotely deplorable in the locker room. Nobody believes me when I say that, but it’s really almost been false advertising. Outside of the time when Merica said he didn’t know who I was in a press conference, it’s been a pleasant experience. And I can’t say enough about what a gem <a href='index.php?showuser=5' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>sarmo</a> is. Really.
On the other hand, I’d be lying if I said I haven’t enjoyed wearing the black hat a little this season. So I guess in that sense, I am more deplorable. I’m a bit amazed that it’s still got some people as upset as it does. Y’all need religion or hugs or something.
How was it to repeat as preseason champions?
How does it feel to keep losing the President’s Trophy to Kelowna? At least that’s something people care about, especially the people in Kelowna apparently.
Name your top 3 female actress or singer crushes.
I can’t answer this! We all know who my true crush is.
(Anne Hathaway is pretty fine, though).
SHL next year or bust? Or 1 last shot for SMJHL glory?
I don’t have a preference, but it’s looking like SHL next season. The Winnipeg folks are very high on me. Also, perhaps, very high, but that’s neither here nor there. So I think I’ll be going up next season to help bolster their forward depth, but we’ll see.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2297' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-54'>InciteHysteria</a>: Are you still seriously considering a name change? I know you've been a bit resistant to the idea but are you starting to soften on the matter?
I mean, I wouldn’t say I’m seriously considering it. I’m really not sure how I got singled out on this. There’s several other North Americans with very not-Russian names on the Russian team, and only one of the other S31 prospects to transfer nations last season made a matchng name change. And that guy did it as a dick joke.
I might be softening a little bit, but honestly the big hang-up for me is continuity. It would be weird to go back and look for Zach Evans in the S31 indexes and look for something else in future seasons. I can embrace Russia fully with my recreate down the road. Why rush?
With that said, I’m sure this won’t be the last word on the matter.
When do you expect to make your Winnipeg debut? Do you feel like you'll be in Detroit for another season?
I think at this point it is a foregone conclusion I will debut in Winnipeg to start S32. Obviously, that could change, but it certainly feels that way.
What are your REALISTIC playoff goals this season?
What’s realistic in the SMJHL postseason? Prince George swept Kelowna last season. My goals for this season are to score my first playoff goal, then score more goals and get Detroit a Four Star Cup. Tell me with a straight face that’s unrealistic after last season. Try it. You can’t do it. So that’s my realistic playoff goal.
If you swap places with any other sniper in the SMJHL, who would it be?
The only answer here is Alex Light. I was second in the league in shots, and he had more. So obviously I’d go somewhere that would give me more shots, although I probably wouldn’t actually score more goals.
What's the greatest pizza topping of all time?
If we’re talking specific topping? That would be the diced chicken on a barbecue chicken pizza. That combines two of the greatest things in the world - chicken and pizza. What more do you want? You want me to put fruit on my pizza? Hell no.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2238' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-54'>Pris</a>: Who do you think the top prospects for the SHL draft will be?
Ooooh, good question. Out of centers, you’re looking at Teodors Cukurs, Samee Iqbal, and Derrick Glover. For wingers, Cory Knouse is a sneaky good prospect who performed well on a good team, but guys like Taro Tsujimoto, Luke Atmey, and Kyle Kylrad will garner more attention. Your defensemen are probably Max Weber, Noctis Caelum, and Ted McDonald. Goalies, well, there’s Dean Melanson and Charlotte Caspari. Radisk Rodders was a late signee, but he’ll also be in the draft and shows plenty of promise.
Why is Russia bae? No, you can't use Ekaterina Rudnikova as a reason.
Because Ekater - oh, you said I can’t use that? Hmm. Well.
In seriousness, I love that pretty much everyone is Russia is at least a little bit insane. And everyone is all-in on the team concept. There’s zero ego in that locker room. I love it.
If you had an NTC, which teams would be your exception(s)? SHL or SMJHL.
I mean, as far as an SMJHL NTC goes, it doesn’t really matter at this point, I guess? The trade deadline has passed and I’m probably going up. I suppose I’d be okay with a trade to Prince George if I could suffocate Selich with a pillow in his sleep, or to Kelowna to steal all of Alex Light’s sticks. But otherwise, meh.
In terms of SHL, I really can’t think of a place I’d rather be right now than Winnipeg. I love the guys in that locker room, and it’s a great place to get away whenever SHL life gets a little too crazy or weird. I can’t imagine playing for anyone else right now. It’s a cop out answer, but it’s the truth.
Favorite verbal typo you've made over the course of your podcasting career so far?
“Prince Borge” from episode 11 was a Hall of Fame caliber verbal typo. That probably gets my vote. There are plenty to choose from, though. I’m really not sure why I suck so much at speaking out loud. Words are hard.
If you could have dinner with one current SHL player, one current SMJHL player (through the end of season 30), and one current NHL player, who would each of those be and why? Where would you take them, and what do you think you'd talk about?
The players invited would be Cikgnar Konstantinov, Ekaterina Rudnikova, and Alexander Ovechkin. We’d eat at someplace Ovie would recommend back in Mother Russia, enjoying some of the nation’s finest cuisine, and talk about how much Pietra Volkova would wish she could be here while sending her selfies on our phones. I’d probably also bring up the 2006 Stanley Cup Finals.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2262' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Kaisonious</a>: How did you first season post SHL draft go?
It went okay, I guess? I’m pretty disappointed with my goal-scoring, but I made enough gains as an all-around player to mask that. With another season under my belt, I have a better idea of the direction to take with my development in the offseason, especially if I do indeed get called up and my TPE cap is lifted.
Which S31 or S32 player has the most potential to become the next superstar?
For S31, I couldn’t possibly pick anyone out of my class. There’s just too many to choose from.
As for S32, obviously I am a huge fan of some of my teammates, like Luke Atmey and Kyle Kylrad. If forced to pick someone from the other seven teams, Max Weber in St. Louis has caught my eye as somebody who could be a top-tier prospect. He’s been overshadowed a bit, both by being a defenseman and by being on a bad team. But he’s legit.
How's your favorite NHL team doing so far this season?
Oh, buddy. So let me tell you about the Carolina Hurricanes. We score enough goals, but our defense hasn’t been great and behind that defense is Cam Ward and Eddie Lack. I repeat, CAM WARD AND EDDIE LACK. So when we outscore teams, a la the S30 Detroit Falcons, everything is lovely and peachy. When we don’t - and more often than not this season, we haven’t - it’s a tire fire. But the team’s young and developing, so I just try to be patient and shield my eyes when the kids do dumb things.
Let's beat an old dead horse. What’re your thoughts on the past two SHL controversies and how they were handled? (Quinn and The Deplorables)
I love beating old, dead horses!
I don’t know much about Carson’s “past lives,” so to speak. Every interaction I’ve had with him has been a positive one, and I hope he can utilize this extra opportunity he’s been given to do things the right way. Certainly, there are going to be skeptics, and he has 100 percent earned that skepticism. But I’m rooting for him, as long as he doesn’t fuck up.
As for my teammates, again, I’ve enjoyed having them in Detroit. I’m a bit surprised there weren’t any rule changes put in place to prevent similar efforts in the future, but I really don’t think we’ll see it attempted again any time soon, if at all. The guys wanted a reaction, they got it. It hasn’t stopped people like Tanner, Dion, or Smirnov Light from re-creating “the old fashioned way” for the upcoming season. Please refer to Shakespeare’s Macbeth. Act 5, Scene 5, lines 26-28.
<a href='index.php?showuser=1722' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Nereus</a>: Who do you think you'd have most chemistry with on the Jets roster?
It’s hard to say. Visser and I have bonded a lot, as fellow first rounders, so much so that he ducked fighting me during a line brawl in a Falcons-Scarecrows game this season. My fellow Russian Vasily Horvat basically showed me how to be a physical forward this season, I’m really looking forwardto spending more time working with him in IIHF this season. It would probably be one of those two.
Describe your playing style.
Defensively, I put myself in good position to win the puck and throw my body around when necessary. Once I have the puck, I bust my ass to get it through the neutral zone and generate offense - a lot of my assists came directly off turnovers leading to odd man rushes this season. Now, if we get set up in the offensive zone? FIRE AT WILL, SON. Fire at will.
What are some weaknesses that you need to work on?
I, uh, need to score more. I’m a sniper who scored 15 goals this season despite playing 23 minutes per game. I’m the water pistol that shoots jelly on the Island of Misfit Toys. I can’t believe this is the answer to this question, but here we are.
Do you see yourself as a future top line forward in the SHL?
Eh, I think it’s an eventual possibility. If I can continue to round out my game, I think I am putting in the effort necessary to reach that point. That’s obviously the goal. I won’t say that I’m aiming to be, you know, a first-round fantasy pick by the prime of my career, but I do want to be a centerpiece of the Jets franchise for seasons to come.
What is one of your favorite pre game meals?
Really, anything that gets you a little gassy so that you can unnerve opponents. It’s a legitimate strategy.
Who do you most enjoy playing with on the Detroit Falcons?
Alexis Metzler. It’s crazy to think about, but in a sense we’re the OG Detroit Falcons now going into this playoff run, with so many rookies on the team. He’s more of an intuitive guy playing a thinking man’s game, always studying the sport and coming up with ways to improve off the ice. It’s fun to watch the wheels turn with him, honestly. And he’s a damn good hockey player, to boot.
Who is the best personality in the Falcons LR?
Hands down, Terrance Nova. He calls me “Captain Zach,” but he’s the locker room leader of the team, not me. Even-keeled, steady as a rock, never too high, never too low, always encouraging.
What did you spend your first SHL paycheck on?
This house. I needed a place to stay in Winnipeg when the call comes, but I have a life to live, you know? Can’t spend it all at one time, I have to plan for the future.
<a href='index.php?showuser=5' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>sarmo</a>: Jets have a rich history from the start of SHL. How long do u think it'll take to revive that once you're called up?
I think, if you give us two or three seasons, the Jets will be back to playoff contention. And if we keep putting the pieces in place, we could be “Jets of old” another season or two after that. I’m really looking forward to being a part of that process.
How do u think you'll do in your first year in the SHL?
There will be some struggles, for sure. I’ve learned a lot this season, and I have a good idea what direction I want to go in with my development for that stage of my career, but I understand - and have seen firsthand from IIHF competition - how steep the jump is to that platform. I’ll have some highs, but I’ll probably have a lot more lows. And that’s fine, it’s just a matter of working through them and continuing to grow and develop.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2338' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>CBear</a>: Which player on the Current Jets Roster are you looking forward to play with?
Big Manious. I’ve heard the stories, I’ve seen the highlights. It’s time to experience the real thing. And he helped me finish third in fantasy this season.
Which line on the Jets are you going to start the season on?
It’s funny you ask that! I just finished listening to the latest Dank Tank, and it’s hardly set in stone. There’s always the possibility of folks signing to join us in free agency, and that would naturally move me down the list. We’ll see!
What role are you looking to play once you reach the Jets?
Early on, I just want to be a reliable and responsible two-way player. Yeah, I’ll shoot when we’re on the right side of the ice, but I don’t want to get burned and give up any silly goals. I prided myself on not being on ice for a lot of goals allowed with Team Russia last IIHF, and that’s something I hope will extend to my SHL career.
When did you master the shot/pass of the pads technique to set up your teammates for goals?
Probably around shot 124 of my season. I got lots of practice this season.
Which Jets Prospect are you looking forward to playing with?
Probably Visser, only to see what on Earth he puts in his Gatorade bottles. Because there’s no way in hell it’s Gatorade.
Which Jets prospects do you think are going to be called up next season, why? which ones are staying down, why?
First of all, TOTALLY NOT MY CALL. But I’d guess it’ll be Visser and I going up next season. The rest of the S31 draft class still have a little bit more development in them, and that will give them the chance to get some quality SMJHL minutes next season. Visser and I have probably done about all the damage we’re going to do in the juniors. And I’m totally talking damage to physical property. Detroit and St. Louis are probably just begging to get rid of us at this point.
<a href='index.php?showuser=1920' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Atlas</a>: Why should you be called up to the big club this coming season? Why shouldn't you?
I’ll argue against the call-up first. I SUCK. I’m 1-6 in playoff matchups. I have zero career postseason goals. My scoring actually declined this season. I’ve developed a bad temper from being around such deplorable teammates. And I have bad hygiene from growing up in North Carolina.
Arguing for the call-up? Hey, boys, you took me fifth overall for a reason. You saw something in me, even if I didn’t prove it at times this season. I will do whatever it takes to help the Jets improve. Let’s get this show on the road, eh?
Which Winnipeg GM do you imagine has better facial hair?
If I had to base it solely on podcast voice, Atlas. If I based it on render, Nereus. Leaning Atlas.
Who was phone?
Phone shot J.R.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2310' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-14'>JKortesi81</a>: Fuck, Marry, Kill: Pris, Mel, Boz. Explain why.
So, alright, first of all, I have to ask if you’re trying to get me killed?
I marry Mel, obviously. I don’t think I have to spell that one out.
After that, I’m really using process of elimination. Not so much which one to fuck, but which one am I actually able to kill? And I got NO SHOT in a scrap with Boz. So we’re fucking her and killing Pris. It’s my only shot at survival.
(And Pris could probably take me, too, but that’s not the point)
When you get called up to the SHL, how are you going to start building Evans? Proceed to continue with CK and killing people? Is there a plan yet?
We’ll see how much banked TPE first. Ideally, I’d like to round out my offensive decision-making stats some and boost my defense. If I have some more to play with, I might try to get checking a little higher, but not much. I should probably also work on my penalty shots at least a little bit, because I have been straight-up dog shit at those. I know they’re not a frequent occurrence, but damn.
If the Falcons come close to a Four Star Cup, will you lobby WPG to let you stay down another year? I mean, with the deplorables gaining TPE, DET's window to win the cup is HUGE next season.
Probably not. I had my chance at riding the coattails of last season’s veterans to a Cup, and I got a chance to lead the team this season. If it happens, it happens, but otherwise I’ve had my shot and I’m looking forward to the next chapter of my career.
Is the worst thing about playing in Winnipeg having to live in Winnipeg?
I mean ... if you go to the hockey game to warm up, something has gone terribly wrong.
I know that the answer to the last question is yes, so if WPG management came to you and said "Zach, you're the face of our franchise for years to come (they'd pick Visser, but chances are he's dying early and/or getting arrested at some point) we need to relocate, pick anywhere in North America for us to move to." Where's your Top 3 places to move to?
Before I move forward, I joke about how unbelievably and stupidly cold it is in Winnipeg, but I can't imagine a better place for the team. It's a great hockey town with great history, and I'm glad I will get the chance to be a part of this storied franchise. But hell, if you're going to force me to move them, here's my list.
1. Durham, North Carolina - Homer pick here. I’m obviously bringing the team to my old stomping grounds. Yeah, Chapel Hill would be “closer to home,” but at its essence it is a college town. Durham would be a much better fit ... and give you better naming options anyways. Downside, of course, is that this would require a move to the Eastern Conference, which is very gross and inconvenient and not worth the trouble.
2. Las Vegas, Nevada - Bring back the :kings. Need I say more? The only downside is this dramatically increases the chances of Visser dying of a coke overdose, but no need to prolong the inevitable.
3. Denver, Colorado - This one is complicated, because obviously they already have the Mammoths so there’d probably have to be some agreement or alteration. But damn, Denver is a great hockey town in the Western United States that loves all of its teams, from the major leagues to the Pioneers. They deserve an SHL team, but it’s probably not going to happen.
<a href='index.php?showuser=2271' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Avakael</a>: What's your impressions of the city of Winnipeg itself thus far?
Did I mention it’s a great hockey town? I love the history here, it’s going to be a huge honor to dress for them when the time comes.
What are you looking forward to the most for next season?
If I’m in Winnipeg - which, again, seems to be the case but not set in stone - then I’ll most looking forward to playing against the absolute best of the best and seeing how I stack up.
If I’m in Detroit, it’s probably safe to assume we didn’t win the Four Star Cup, so then it should be pretty obvious why I’m there and what I’m trying to do.
Do you think you will have good chances of winning ROTY next season?