Gonna make this one short - I've got a lot of shit going on and shouldn't be spending my work time doing SHL stuff like I have been.  I caught myself doing this with my last player and said I'd be more casual this time around.  But yesterday I caught myself spending a bunch of time on discord and finding things to do with the SHL and slacking a ton at work and realized I've been doing that for a while now.  I'm going to refocus back on the important things and fake hockey is going to have to take a seat way in the back of that bus.

I'm planning on doing some basic AC + Trainings and easy things (and that may even fall off), but really don't expect much out of Ivan Lacksamus.  Feel free to pick me up late in the draft if you need a roster filler but wanted to publicly set expectations early on that my activity NEEDS to be minimized. 

Feel free to throw me a note if you need anything, but I've pulled discord off of my phone and don't plan to check it much so your best bet to reach me is via PM on here and I'll get back to you when I pop back on in a few days or so.

Good luck all!

 


Sig credit: Ragnar, Carpy48, High Stick King


Ivan Lacksamus || RW || Detroit Falcons
Number: 14
Height: 6ft 1in
Weight: 200 lbs
Birthplace: Switzerland

Bet you still go top 10

KARI KEKKONEN | D | RETIRED
NAME: Kari Kekkonen
BIRTHPLACE: Oulu, Finland
HEIGHT: 6'1"
WEIGHT: 185 lbs
NUMBER: 33
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S19 KEL: GP: 40, G: 10, A: 26, P: 36, +/-: 16, H: 42

SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S19 KEL: GP: 6, G: 0, A: 6, P: 6, +/-: 0, H: 6
------------------------------------------------------------

KAAPO KEKKONEN | C | RETIRED
NAME: Kaapo Kekkonen
BIRTHPLACE: Helsinki, Finland
HEIGHT: 6'3"
WEIGHT: 210 lbs
NUMBER: 19
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S25 LAP: GP: 50, G: 2, A: 3, P: 5, +/-: -4, H: 75
S26 LAP: GP: 50, G: 4, A: 5, P: 9, +/-: -13, H: 94
S27 LAP: GP: 50, G: 6, A: 9, P: 15, +/-: -2, H: 35
S28 LAP: GP: 50, G: 7, A: 10, P: 17, +/-: -2, H: 96
S29 LAP: GP: 50, G: 13, A: 21, P: 34, +/-: -15, H: 85
S30 LAP: GP: 50, G: 23, A: 22, P: 45, +/-: 4, H: 130
S31 LAP: GP: 50, G: 20, A: 18, P: 38, +/-: 5, H: 162
S32 LAP: GP: 50, G: 18, A: 28, P: 46, +/-: 27, H: 183
S33 LAP: GP: 50, G: 17, A: 22, P: 39, +/-: 20, H: 210
S34 LAP: GP: 50, G: 12, A: 25, P: 37, +/-: -2, H: 131
S35 LAP: GP: 50, G: 10, A: 22, P: 32, +/-: -3, H: 115
S36 LAP: GP: 50, G: 11, A: 20, P: 31, +/-: 10, H: 138
S37 LAP: GP: 36, G: 9, A: 17, P: 26, +/-: -1, H: 72
S37 WKP: GP: 14, G: 1, A: 0, P: 1, +/-: -4, H: 19
TOT : GP: 650, G: 153, A: 222, P: 375, +/-: 20, H: 1545
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S25 LAP: DNQ
S26 LAP: DNQ
S27 LAP: DNQ
S28 LAP: DNQ
S29 LAP: DNQ
S30 LAP: DNQ
S31 LAP: DNQ
S32 LAP: GP: 5, G: 1, A: 3, P: 4, +/-: -2, H: 15
S33 LAP: GP: 12, G: 2, A: 3, P: 5, +/-: 0, H: 38
S34 LAP: GP: 7, G: 1, A: 3, P: 4, +/-: 3, H: 23
S35 LAP: GP: 5, G: 1, A: 1, P: 2, +/-: -4, H: 4
S36 LAP: DNQ
S37 WKP: GP: 12, G: 0, A: 2, P: 2, +/-: -2, H: 35
TOT : GP: 41, G: 5, A: 12, P: 17, +/-: -5, H: 115
------------------------------------------------------------

TATU MÄKELÄ | D | RETIRED
NAME: Tatu Mäkelä
BIRTHPLACE: Tampere, Finland
HEIGHT: 5'11"
WEIGHT: 180 lbs
NUMBER: 65
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S40 BUF: GP: 50, G: 5, A: 17, P: 22, +/-: -28, H: 14, SB: 86
S41 BUF: GP: 50, G: 10, A: 21, P: 31, +/-: -3, H: 9, SB: 78
S42 BUF: GP: 50, G: 9, A: 21, P: 30, +/-: 2, H: 13, SB: 65
S43 BUF: GP: 50, G: 6, A: 24, P: 30, +/-: 1, H: 8, SB: 51
S44 BUF: GP: 50, G: 6, A: 28, P: 34, +/-: -6, H: 10, SB: 63
S45 BUF: GP: 50, G: 4, A: 37, P: 41, +/-: 10, H: 130, SB: 71
S46 BUF: GP: 50, G: 6, A: 36, P: 42, +/-: 25, H: 139, SB: 73
S47 BUF: GP: 50, G: 5, A: 23, P: 28, +/-: -4, H: 137, SB: 76
S48 BUF: GP: 50, G: 7, A: 25, P: 32, +/-: 9, H: 151, SB: 70
S49 BUF: GP: 50, G: 6, A: 22, P: 28, +/-: 5, H: 159, SB: 66
S50 BUF: GP: 50, G: 6, A: 20, P: 26, +/-: 14, H: 152, SB: 72
S51 BUF: GP: 50, G: 3, A: 23, P: 26, +/-: 8, H: 143, SB: 50
S52 BUF: GP: 50, G: 9, A: 21, P: 30, +/-: -3, H: 141, SB: 71
S53 BUF: GP: 50, G: 5, A: 14, P: 19, +/-: 23, H: 50, SB: 98
TOT : GP: 700, G: 87, A: 332, P: 419, +/-: 53, H: 1256, SB: 990
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S40 BUF: DNQ
S41 BUF: GP: 7, G: 3, A: 2, P: 5, +/-: -3, H: 0, SB: 10
S42 BUF: GP: 5, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -9, H: 2, SB: 10
S43 BUF: GP: 9, G: 0, A: 5, P: 5, +/-: -1, H: 1, SB: 8
S44 BUF: DNQ
S45 BUF: DNQ
S46 BUF: GP: 17, G: 0, A: 12, P: 12, +/-: 11, H: 59, SB: 28
S47 BUF: GP: 13, G: 0, A: 5, P: 5, +/-: 2, H: 32, SB: 18
S48 BUF: GP: 22, G: 2, A: 10, P: 12, +/-: 2, H: 64, SB: 32
S49 BUF: GP: 5, G: 0, A: 5, P: 5, +/-: 5, H: 15, SB: 8
S50 BUF: GP: 6, G: 0, A: 5, P: 5, +/-: -2, H: 18, SB: 12
S51 BUF: GP: 8, G: 2, A: 5, P: 7, +/-: -3, H: 15, SB: 11
S52 BUF: GP: 15, G: 4, A: 5, P: 9, +/-: 4, H: 47, SB: 26
S53 BUF: GP: 4, G: 0, A: 0, P: 0, +/-: 0, H: 6, SB: 13
TOT : GP: 111, G: 11, A: 55, P: 66, +/-: 6, H: 159, SB: 176
------------------------------------------------------------

KOLJA KEKKONEN | D | RETIRED
NAME: Kolja Kekkonen
BIRTHPLACE: Lappeenranta, Finland
HEIGHT: 6'3"
WEIGHT: 225 lbs
NUMBER: 8
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S53 DET: GP: 3, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -1, H: 2, SB: 0
S54 DET: GP: 50, G: 2, A: 8, P: 10, +/-: -6, H: 15, SB: 37
S55 DET: GP: 50, G: 4, A: 12, P: 16, +/-: -24, H: 32, SB: 24
S56 DET: GP: 50, G: 4, A: 17, P: 21, +/-: -20, H: 52, SB: 71
S57 ANA: GP: 66, G: 6, A: 20, P: 26, +/-: 14, H: 52, SB: 70
TOT : GP: 219, G: 16, A: 58, P: 74, +/-: -37, H: 153, SB: 202
SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S53 DET: DNP
S54 DET: GP: 7, G: 0, A: 0, P: 0, +/-: 0, H: 2, SB: 3
S55 DET: GP: 4, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -2, H: 3, SB: 0
S56 DET: GP: 5, G: 2, A: 2, P: 4, +/-: 0, H: 3, SB: 7
S57 ANA: GP: 21, G: 2, A: 13, P: 15, +/-: 5, H: 13, SB: 34
TOT : GP: 37, G: 4, A: 16, P: 20, +/-: 3, H: 22, SB: 44
------------------------------------------------------------

KEKW KEKKONEN | C | RETIRED
NAME: Karl-Erik-Karl2-Wojtek Kekkonen
BIRTHPLACE: Lohja, Finland
HEIGHT: 6'4"
WEIGHT: 220 lbs
NUMBER: 69
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S61 BUF: GP: 66, G: 10, A: 28, P: 38, +/-: 21, H: 59, SH: 134
S62 BUF: GP: 66, G: 19, A: 36, P: 55, +/-: 9, H: 84, SH: 194
S63 BUF: GP: 66, G: 17, A: 14, P: 31, +/-: -13, H: 91, SH: 148
S64 BUF: GP: 66, G: 16, A: 51, P: 67, +/-: 36, H: 82, SH: 212
S65 BUF: GP: 66, G: 25, A: 41, P: 66, +/-: 33, H: 136, SH: 230
S66 BUF: GP: 66, G: 38, A: 43, P: 81, +/-: 18, H: 64, SH: 222
S67 BUF: GP: 66, G: 40, A: 45, P: 85, +/-: -6, H: 76, SH: 224
S68 BUF: GP: 66, G: 47, A: 46, P: 93, +/-: 45, H: 51, SH: 326
S69 BUF: GP: 66, G: 35, A: 31, P: 66, +/-: 22, H: 43, SH: 269
S70 BUF: GP: 66, G: 33, A: 48, P: 81, +/-: 18, H: 66, SH: 297
S71 BUF: GP: 66, G: 36, A: 41, P: 77, +/-: 37, H: 55, SH: 257
S72 BUF: GP: 66, G: 25, A: 35, P: 60, +/-: -1, H: 58, SH: 281
S73 BUF: GP: 66, G: 31, A: 41, P: 72, +/-: 23, H: 48, SH: 305
S74 BUF/WPG: GP: 66, G: 17, A: 47, P: 64, +/-: 33, H: 101, SH: 164
TOT : GP: 924, G: 389, A: 547, P: 936, +/-: 275, H: 1014, SH: 3263
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S61 BUF: GP: 9, G: 2, A: 6, P: 8, +/-: 4, H: 11, SH: 24
S62 BUF: GP: 9, G: 3, A: 1, P: 4, +/-: 2, H: 5, SH: 25
S63 BUF: GP: 12, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -1, H: 32, SH: 33
S64 BUF: GP: 11, G: 2, A: 2, P: 4, +/-: -6, H: 12, SH: 41
S65 BUF: GP: 18, G: 4, A: 7, P: 11, +/-: 8, H: 34, SH: 62
S66 BUF: GP: 16, G: 11, A: 9, P: 20, +/-: 3, H: 13, SH: 49
S67 BUF: GP: 4, G: 2, A: 2, P: 4, +/-: -3, H: 3, SH: 20
S68 BUF: GP: 17, G: 6, A: 8, P: 14, +/-: -4, H: 11, SH: 75
S69 BUF: GP: 4, G: 1, A: 0, P: 1, +/-: -5, H: 2, SH: 13
S70 BUF: GP: 7, G: 1, A: 3, P: 4, +/-: -8, H: 2, SH: 25
S71 BUF: GP: 21, G: 12, A: 9, P: 21, +/-: 6, H: 24, SH: 97
S72 BUF: GP: 5, G: 0, A: 2, P: 2, +/-: -4, H: 7, SH: 25
S73 BUF: GP: 6, G: 3, A: 0, P: 3, +/-: -3, H: 11, SH: 33
S74 WPG: GP: 22, G: 3, A: 4, P: 7, +/-: -2, H: 15, SH: 37
TOT : GP: 161, G: 51, A: 55, P: 106, +/-: -11, H: 182, SH: 559
------------------------------------------------------------

KAL ÅKAR KEKKONEN | D | SEATTLE ARGONAUTS
NAME: Kal Åkar Kekkonen
BIRTHPLACE: The Wilderness, Gielinor
HEIGHT: 6'6"
WEIGHT: 240 lbs
NUMBER: 75
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S74 DET: GP: 66, G: 6, A: 14, P: 20, +/-: 3, SH: 83, H: 76, SB: 29
S75 DET: GP: 66, G: 8, A: 22, P: 30, +/-: 31, SH: 129, H: 123, SB: 114
S76 DET: GP: 66, G: 17, A: 21, P: 38, +/-: -10, SH: 193, H: 74, SB: 130

SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S74 DET: GP: 17, G: 3, A: 7, P: 10, +/-: 8, SH: 18, H: 16, SB: 5
S75 DET: GP: 14, G: 5, A: 6, P: 11, +/-: 2, SH: 40, H: 26, SB: 27
S76 DET: GP: 4, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -2, SH: 8, H: 8, SB: 8
------------------------------------------------------------

Bet you still go top 10

I can totally see this too.

Bet you still go top 10

We’re not exactly a deep class.

Clarence Worley | LW | Ottawa Highlanders | Montreal Patriotes | 661 TPE
SMJHL Career
S77 - OTT (LD) || GP: 66 || G: 2 || A: 19 || Pts: 21 || PM: -1 || PIM: 34 || H: 88 || BLK: 115
S78 - OTT || GP: 66 || G: 19 || A: 25 || Pts: 44 || PM: -16 || PIM: 31 || H: 149 || BLK: 57
SMJHL Playoffs
S77 - OTT (LD) || GP: 21 || G: 1 || A: 9 || Pts: 10 || PM: 2 || PIM: 6 || H: 27 || BLK: 57
S77 - OTT || GP: 11 || G: 4 || A: 4 || Pts: 8 || PM: -2 || PIM: 0 || H: 19 || BLK: 8
Career Notes
Drafted 19th Overall by OTT in S77 SMJHL Entry Draft
Drafted 22nd Overall by MTL in S78 SHL Entry Draft

Josef Kubinec | LW | Texas Renegades | Retired
SMJHL Career
S46 - HAL || GP: 43 || G: 4 || A: 2 || Pts: 6 || PM: +2 || PIM: 6 || H: 22
S47 - HAL || GP: 50 || G: 10 || A: 10 || Pts: 20 || PM: -7 || PIM: 38 || H: 34
S48 - HAL || GP: 50 || G: 20 || A: 22 || Pts: 42 || PM: +10 || PIM: 10 || H: 24
S49 - HAL || GP: 50 || G: 20 || A: 26 || Pts: 46 || PM: +17 || PIM: 35 || H: 53
SMJHL Playoffs
S46 - HAL || GP: 13 || G: 0 || A: 1 || Pts: 1 || PM: -2 || PIM: 0 || H: 2
S47 - HAL || GP: 4 || G: 2 || A: 0 || Pts: 0 || PM: 0 || PIM: 4 || H: 3
S48 - HAL || GP: 16 || G: 6 || A: 7 || Pts: 13 || PM: 0 || PIM: 10 || H: 5
S49 - HAL || GP: 7 || G: 3 || A: 2 || Pts: 5 || PM: +2 || PIM: 2 || H: 10
SHL Career
S50 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 10 || A: 13 || Pts: 23 || PM: -15 || PIM: 10 || H: 15
S51 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 24 || A: 22 || Pts: 46 || PM: -7 || PIM: 20 || H: 45
S52 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 16 || A: 16 || Pts: 32 || PM: -18 || PIM: 20 || H: 56
S53 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 15 || A: 18 || Pts: 33 || PM: -21 || PIM: 20 || H: 48
S54 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 18 || A: 33 || Pts: 51 || PM: +6 || PIM: 26 || H: 25
S55 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 13 || A: 22 || Pts: 35 || PM: -1|| PIM: 12 || H: 35
S56 - TEX || GP: 50 || G: 21 || A: 41 || Pts: 62 || PM: +22|| PIM: 18 || H: 44
S57 - TEX || GP: 66 || G: 22 || A: 47 || Pts: 69 || PM: +6|| PIM: 10 || H: 48
S58 - TEX || GP: 66 || G: 35 || A: 30 || Pts: 65 || PM: +47|| PIM: 12 || H: 75
S59 - TEX || GP: 66 || G: 14 || A: 33 || Pts: 47 || PM: +31|| PIM: 6 || H: 41
S60 - TEX || GP: 66 || G: 27 || A: 32 || Pts: 59 || PM: +24|| PIM: 21 || H: 54
S61 - TEX || GP: 66 || G: 22 || A: 28 || Pts: 50 || PM: +25|| PIM: 8 || H: 29
Total || GP: 680 || G: 237 || A: 335 || Pts: 572 || PM: +99|| PIM: 183 || H: 515
SHL Playoffs
S55 - TEX || GP: 4 || G: 0 || A: 1 || Pts: 1 || PM: -1|| PIM: 0 || H: 3
S56 - TEX || GP: 4 || G: 0 || A: 0 || Pts: 0 || PM: -7|| PIM: 0 || H: 1
S57 - TEX || GP: 5 || G: 1 || A: 1 || Pts: 2 || PM: -2|| PIM: 0 || H: 5
S58 - TEX || GP: 12 || G: 3 || A: 2 || Pts: 5 || PM: -4|| PIM: 2 || H: 10
S59 - TEX || GP: 16 || G: 3 || A: 12 || Pts: 15 || PM: +13|| PIM: 0 || H: 14
S60 - TEX || GP: 9 || G: 6 || A: 4 || Pts: 10 || PM: +9|| PIM: 0 || H: 10
S61 - TEX || GP: 19 || G: 8 || A: 5 || Pts: 13 || PM: +5|| PIM: 0 || H: 17
Total || GP: 69 || G: 26 || A: 25 || Pts: 51 || PM: +13|| PIM: 2 || H: 60
Career Notes
Signed to Halifax as Free Agent, S46
Drafted 53rd Overall by TEX in S47 Entry Draft
Aidan Richan Award Nominee - S51
Named Alternate Captain for Texas Renegades - S54
Aidan Richan Award Winner - S56
All-Star - 3rd Team - S56
Won S59 Challenge Cup with Texas Renegades
IIHF Bronze Medal With Finland - S61
Retired after S61
4th all time in points for Texas Renegades*
5th all time in goals for Texas Renegades*
(*) At time of retirement

   

That SHL relapse can hit hard. Coming back just to "get a little bump" after being off it for so long can lead to full time usage again and again. Respect for telling everyone else about this now.

Joe Kurczewski ll New Orleans Specters GM ll 1679 TPE

Drafted 12th overall by the Calgary Dragons in the S31 SHL Entry Draft
Drafted 22nd Overall to STL in the SMJHL S30 Entry Draft
Named Assistant Captain of the Scarecrows for S30
Named Captain of the Scarecrows for S31 and S32
Won the IIHF Gold Medal with Team USA in S31
Traded to Montreal at the S32 Trade Deadline
Named STL Scarecrows Co-GM
Won the S32 Challenge Cup with the Calgary Dragons
Won the IIHF Gold Medal with Team USA in S34
Won the S39 Four Star Cup as GM of the St. Louis Scarecrows
Won the S40 Challenge Cup with the Calgary Dragons
Won the S40 Ron Mexico Trophy (League MVP as voted by the awards committee)
Won the S40 Sarmad Khan Trophy (League MVP as voted by the players)
Won the IIHF Gold Medal with Team USA in S40.
Won the S42 Challenge Cup with the Calgary Dragons
Won the S42 Jeff Dar Trophy for Best Two-Way Forward
Won the S42 Anton Razov Trophy for Playoff MVP
Won the S44 Four Star Cup as GM of the St. Louis Scarecrows
Traded in the S44/S45 offseason to the Edmonton Blizzard for an S46 1st Round Pick
Won the S45 Challenge Cup with the Edmonton Blizzard
Won the S45 Four Star Cup as GM of the St. Louis Scarerows
Was awarded one of the two expansion franchises for S46 (New Orleans Specters)
 SHL STATS

Regular Season
------------------------------------------------------------------
S33: 50 GP - 6 G - 9 A - 15 PTS
S34: 50 GP - 14 G - 14 A - 28 PTS
S35: 50 GP - 14 G - 12 A - 26 PTS
S36: 50 GP - 23 G - 29 A - 52 PTS
S37: 50 GP - 28 G - 29 A - 57 PTS
S38: 50 GP - 25 G - 21 A - 46 PTS
S39: 50 GP - 17 G - 30 A - 47 PTS
S40: 50 GP - 29 G - 37 A - 66 PTS
S41: 50 GP - 25 G - 38 A - 63 PTS
S42: 50 GP - 18 G - 35 A - 53 PTS
S43: 50 GP - 17 G - 35 A - 52 PTS
S44: 50 GP - 21 G - 24 A - 45 PTS
S45: 50 GP - 22 G - 37 A - 59 PTS
------------------------------------------------------------------
Career: 650 GP - 259 G - 350 A - 609 PTS

Playoffs:
------------------------------------------------------------------
S32: 2 GP - 0 G - 0 A - 0 PTS (Won Challenge Cup)
S33: 16 GP - 6 G - 3 A - 9 PTS (Lost in Cup Final to NEW 4-2)

S34: Did Not Qualify
S35: 13 GP - 7 G - 4 A - 11 PTS (Lost in 2nd Round to POR 4-3)
S36: 11 GP - 5 G - 7 A - 12 PTS (Lost in 2nd Round to TEX 4-0)
S37: 7 GP - 5 G - 8 A - 13 PTS (Lost in 1st Round to SEA 4-3)
S38: 17 GP - 10 G - 11 A - 21 PTS (Lost in Cup Final to MAN 4-2)
S39: 4 GP - 1 G  - 1 A - 2 PTS (Lost in 1st Round to LAP 4-0)
S40: 19 GP - 6 G - 18 A - 24 PTS (Won Challenge Cup)
S41: 6 GP - 3 G - 3 A - 6 PTS (Lost in 1st Round to WPG 4-2)
S42: 16 GP - 10 G - 15 A - 25 PTS (Won Challenge Cup)
S43: 6 GP - 5 G - 3 A - 8 PTS (Lost in 1st Round to WPG 4-2)
S44: 5 GP - 0 G - 2 A - 2 PTS (Lost in 1st Round to EDM 4-1)
S45: 18 GP - 9 G - 10 A - 19 PTS(Won Challenge Cup)
_________________________________________
Totals: 138 GP - 68 G - 84 A - 152 PTS

SMJHL STATS
Regular Season:

S30: 50 GP - 13 G - 13 A - 26 PTS 
S31: 50 GP - 17 G - 21 A - 38 PTS
S32: STL: 42 GP - 14 G - 7 A - 21 PTS
S32: MTL: 8 GP - 2 G - 2 A - 4 PTS 
S32: TOT: 50 GP - 16 G - 9 A - 25 PTS
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoffs: 
 
S30: 7GP - 3 G - 3 A - 6 PTS
S31: 4GP - 0 G - 0 A - 0 PTS
S32: 4GP - 3 G - 1 A - 4 PTS


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You take things at the pace you need to balance it with life Cheese, just know we're happy to have you here no matter what

 

     

just stay in juniors agabagabagabagaba

"Bring back Pingy Pingu Lunga Gumba esq. And I mean bring him all the way back. I want every thread on this forum that involves even a modicum of salt to get razed to the ground by our most notorious shitposting penguin. I want every thunderdome to drown in ABAGABA spam and a signature that doesn't end. I want the userbase of this fine league to cower in terror, slinking about the forums and making as little noise as possible for fear of attracting the Shitpost Slenderman. When some poor immigrant from the NFL sim blunders into the forum and makes an angry post about how his player slipped to the early second round despite having done ALL the rookie tasks(!), let the veteran survivalists stare in horror and pity while the newbie rages. They will know it is only a matter of time before @Pingy Pingu descends upon his post like a ravening wolf and obliterates his tread, reducing it to a radioactive waste-dump of unintelligible spam. They will not interfere, for Pingy is our immune system. Because he can take it. Our Dark Knight of Shitposting"

Sig credit to @WannabeFinn @JSS @Mordaciious @Mayuu @TommySalami
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