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Muford · 02-15-2021, 07:36 PM

Vladmir, after being called up by the Tampa Bay Barracuda, after winning a title with the Anchorage Armada, and having healed from an undisclosed injury which he was only able to play at about 50% (425 TPE's worth), is now ready to take questions.

“Yes. If you could be any type of tree what would you be and why?”

Ahh, good question my fellow friend, that is a very good question indeed. You see, there are so many trees that I believe I would fit into their narrative, but I think the best tree that describes me is a Pine Tree. You know why? You see, Pine Trees are prickly fuckers that never go away unless cut down. That fits my description to a T, if you get my drift. But yes, A Pine Tree is what I would probably be.

“Why does Vladmir misspelled his name?”

Ahh, So you think I misspelled MY Name? I see, you think that you are correct in the spelling of my name, but you see, it is not I who named me but my Mother. My Mother was quite possibly drunk, after giving birth to me, as you know, there are like 14 of us spread across the world. But either which way, she was super drunk most likely after I came out the womb, and probably when I was in there too, but that’s a story for a different time. And she probably just forgot the first I in Vladimir. Alas, I own my name and my name owns me, so Vladmir it is.

“Wyd?”

Ahh, you see, I am sitting here, ever vigilantly waiting to shower and walk the dog, then go to the rink to get some work in before I take a nice relaxing bubbly bath tonight in which I can smoke a nice fat joint and relax. You know, this skating business and working like a mad man is not good for my health. It’s not really good for anyone’s health.

“Tommy Tuck is an all-time player with some amazing credentials. Challenge Cups, IIHF awards, and glowing statistics were good metrics for your first player. Petrov is in a younger franchise, with a different nationality, and in more competitive statistic categories. -- What will your metrics of success be for Vladmir Petrov? TPE? Goals? Assists? Postseason success?”

You know, that is a great question that I have actually sat down and thought about for a long time. Tommy Tuck’s max TPE was only like 1300 ish, or so, so I know for a fact Vladmir will pass that. Hell, I want Vladmir to get into the 2k club, so that is his goal on TPE. On top of that, I also plan to attempt to make the Hall of Fame with this player, so I guess that is also another goal of Vladmir Petrov. By biggest accomplishment I want with Vladmir though, out of everything, will be to be better then all other Petrovs in the league. I want to be the most scoring Petrov, the Most Assistful Petrov, and I want to be the most remembered Petrov. I know it might not be the best, but its how I continue to stay motivated to continue working on this league.

“What are attributes that you are looking to keep low? excluding fighting, probably? Are there any interesting/new things that you want to try with your build?”

To be honest with you, I do not know as much about hockey as most others here, nor do I know much about a lot of things referencing this engine either. I trust that my General Managers will put me into a position to be the best player I can possibly become with a build. But the attributes I’ll probably keep very low, like you stated, would be Fighting. Outside of Fighting, I would probably keep Faceoffs, Shot Blocking, and maybe Aggression lower then most other things, as I do not see my player after taking faceoffs, barely going down for Shot Blocking, and I assume Aggression will lead to many more penalties. Something, I do not want to lead the category in.

“Who will be the biggest bust in your draft class? who will be the biggest overachiever?”

That’s quite a tough one to answer. Honestly, I hate to say it, but the biggest bust might be Mikhael Petrov, since he has already gone Inactive. So much hype for the Petrov brotherhood, and he disappeared on us already. The Biggest overachiever, while I would like to say myself, it wouldn’t be that. It might be another Petrov brother, Potentially Slava Petrov, as he is a veteran in multiple leagues and while his earning is down, he still will surprise you with how long he can stay around.

“Whats your favorite dad joke you’ve told?”

My son, you must not know me if you do not know which joke is my favorite. All Dad Jokes are my Favorite. I live for dad jokes. I’ll Die for Dad Jokes. Dad Jokes are what make the world go round.

“Tea or coffee? And why is the answer vodka?”

Tea or Coffee. Well, I don’t really drink Coffee, so it would have to be a nice green tea. But yes, throw some vodka on that bitch and let me drink all night please sir.

“Shoes?”
Yes. Shoes. Yes. I do not really understand the question, so therefore yes, Shoes. I wear them and I hope you do to.

“Do you think utilities like power and water should be publicly owned, and if so to what extent do you think this applies to other industries like healthcare, internet, and taco bell?

You see, I do whole heartedly agree that Water and Electricity should be publicly owned. That way if these are publicly owned, then there is more stuff for the people. Honestly, the one thing that should be publicly owned for sure is Taco Bell. God I would live at Taco Bell if it was publicly owned.

“Can I have a job?”

Didn’t you get a job to be the head of Finland? What else do you want? How many jobs do you want to have? This is unfair to think that you should have all the jobs, when poor Vladmir only gets to skate for a living.

“What has been some of your favorite memories so far in your career?”

Honestly, getting drafted along all my brothers was a huge one for me. That really cemented the fact that we are now here stateside and that we are here to dominate the league for years to come. It really will stick with me for the rest of my life.

Another Memory that is by far one of if not the best was last season, winning the SMJHL trophy with my team out in Anchorage. We really showed that even if you think you’re down and out, you just got to stick to your guns and keep trucking on, and that’s how we beat Quebec City. We really pulled together as a team and stuck it out to win it all. I’m so proud of that whole organization.

“How do you like your eggs?”

Most of the time, I love my eggs scrambled, like my brain. It’s just all over the place and its just a mess. Other times, like on burgers and such, I’ll take my egg, what is that called? Sunny Side Up? Or whatever. That’s how I eat my egg when its on other foods.

Jericson · 02-15-2021, 07:39 PM

Yes. If you could be any type of tree what would you be and why?

Wearingabear · 02-15-2021, 07:42 PM

Why does Vladmir misspelled his name?

PremierBromanov · 02-15-2021, 07:42 PM

Wyd?

Julio Tokolosh · 02-15-2021, 09:11 PM

Tommy Tuck is an all-time player with some amazing credentials. Challenge Cups, IIHF awards, and glowing statistics were good metrics for your first player. Petrov is in a younger franchise, with a different nationality, and in more competitive statistic categories. -- What will your metrics of success be for Vladmir Petrov? TPE? Goals? Assists? Postseason success?

What are attributes that you are looking to keep low? excluding fighting, probably? Are there any interesting/new things that you want to try with your build?

Who will be the biggest bust in your draft class? who will be the biggest overachiever?

trella · 02-15-2021, 11:22 PM

Whats your favorite dad joke you’ve told?

Thanks to @karey and @JSS for the sigs!

Former USA Fed Head, Carolina Kraken Co-GM, Tampa Bay Barracuda GM

*Carpy48* · 02-17-2021, 02:29 AM

Tea or coffee? And why is the answer vodka?

Muford · 02-21-2021, 02:35 PM

Answered to here, gib more questions

***golden_apricot*** · 02-21-2021, 02:35 PM

Shoes?

PremierBromanov · 02-21-2021, 02:53 PM

Do you think utilities like power and water should be publically owned, and if so, to what extent do you think this applies to other industries like healthcare, internet, and taco bell?

Fitted2106 · 02-21-2021, 03:35 PM

Can I have a job?

MCP_ · 02-22-2021, 02:08 AM

What has been some of your favorite memories so far in your career?

***hockeyiscool*** · 02-22-2021, 08:06 PM

How do you like your eggs?

Muford · 02-25-2021, 05:48 PM

Done to here.

Pls grade.

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