(830 Word Count = 5:35 Video/Audio)
I wrote the script and interlaced it with video and audio.
A complete rip off of UrinatingTree Videos.


What is this garbage? Don't get me wrong, he had a great run 15 to 20 years ago but...
when I say goodbye to Hollywood I think of the original white boy rapper!

That's better! This guy is irrelevant these days but back in the day he had more hits than the 
Anaheim Outlaws in the '47 Playoffs!

Wait a second... what video is this? Oh it's the Militia! Yeah this is the Boston Militia Womens Football Leauge.
A full contact football league for women. Perhaps you should of scouted these girls.
They aren't afraid of hitting or getting hit and I bet you would of actually won the Cup with a few of them on the team.

Remember this game Montreal? This was the last game of the season that you actually won!
A 5-2 final score that took a commanding lead in the series and put you up 3-2.
All you had to do was win one more stupid game!
You go into Anheim and get 9 Power Plays but could not convert on any of them!?
Talk about wanting to go to my laundry room to open a new bottle of bleach and chug it down!

You know what?? Screw Billy Joel! Let's change this to Joan Jett and the Blackhearts!
Cause I really do hate myself for loving you!

So let's forget about game 6 for now and just concentrate on your "Special" teams play!?
Did you know that you went 1 for 7 in game 5 on the power play?
How in the world did you end up winning that game 5-2?
So you go into game 6 and decide to top that with OH for 9!?
I don't like to use the F Word because of the kiddies but Fuck That Montreal.
You Mother Fuckers go 1 for 16 in those two games. Just Shoot Me now and get it over with!
Alright, I will admit that you did go 6 for 31 in the Four Star Cup Finals on the man advantage but
I just can't get over how you went 0 for 9 in game 6!
A game where you should have turned the lights out on these no good Outlaws!
And when you look back at it you went 2 for 20 in the last 3 games??
That is unacceptable as it translates to a 10% conversion rate.
Yes I have the internet and let it do the math for me.

By the way Montreal... I wish you would make up your minds already!
Are you the Impact or the Militia. You have the blue and white now with the Impact Soccer Logo.
What a Jip! Maybe you should go back to Impact Red and forget this Militia Idea.
It certainly didn't work this year and I don't want to hear about how you got to the Finals.
Like Ricky Bobby says... If you Ain't First You're Last!

This was your year Montreal. A perfect set up as the Outlaws upset the 3 time Champions handing you the cup
on a platter of ice!

So instead of hating myself for loving you I am going to play you the audio of the game 6 goal in Anaheim.
You know the one you gave up not being able to convert on 9 Power Plays!
I will harp on that stat till the day I die!

So let's recap what happened exactly...

You tried to blow it going down 2-1 in the series but you fought back like the Militia of old, never giving up and 
never surrendering. I guess it wouldn't hurt so bad but you came back to home ice with the rabid fan base.
You got the early lead and held onto it till midway into the third period and all of a sudden in less than two minutes
you go and choke away 2 goals and I am supposed to be happy about this.
I am supposed to give you a standing ovation because you achieved a better season and playoffs than the 
analysts projected?? Well screw that and screw you and screw those analysts. This was your year and in
the end all that matters is hoisting the cup! I'm glad the Outlaws got to hoist the cup in your hometown and arena.
If you are going to break my heart I want the pain to be real and I can't think of anything more painful than watching
a 5th seeded team beat you in game 7 while they lift the cup in front of you and your fans!

I guess you had a strong '48 Entry Draft and on Paper you look like the team to beat in this upcoming season but
I don't want to hear about this next year bullshit. You had it and you blew it. Case Closed!
I hope you all hit your balls in the woods and into the lakes and out of bounds on your favorite golf course!
Congrats Militia!