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***JaytheGreat*** · 08-23-2019, 06:21 PM

Hot Potato Trophy - SHL S49 Sim 16

SHL S49 Game 250 - LAP @ SFP

SHL Game 250 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Steven Moyer @CanadianDuck
Team: San Francisco Pride
Victim: Maurice Picard @academydropout
Team: Los Angeles Panthers
Time: 6:56 of 2nd period
Total possession time: 26:56
Hot po-take-to: As the head coach for the Pride had to Moyer's wallet from him, Moyer was seen handing out pepperoni pizza's to fans in during the 1st intermission. About 7 minutes into the 2nd period Moyer laid a hit on the Panther's Maurice Picard, Moyer regains his clarity and starts to get his head back into the game.

SHL Game 250 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Maurice Picard @academydropout
Team: Los Angeles Panthers
Victim: Joseph Lombardi @bluesfan55
Team: San Francisco Pride
Time: 9:42 of 2nd period
Total possession time: 2:46
Hot po-take-to: Picard doesn't have the potato long enough for it's special brain powers to take affect. Picard sees Joseph Lombardi with his head down skating across the ice and levels him. Lombardi gets up and sees stars in his eyes, and like any jukebox hero after every stoppage in play he starts using his stick as an air guitar. While the crowd loves his antics, his coach does not and threatens to bench him for the rest of the game.

SHL Game 250 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Joseph Lombardi @bluesfan55
Team: San Francisco Pride
Victim: N/A
Team: Los Angeles Panthers
Time: N/A
Total possession time: 30:18
Hot po-take-to: Lombardi keeps the potato for the rest of the game, and when the stadium plays Dancing Queen, Lombardi is the first person on the ice to show his skills. The potato clearly is in a musical mood tonight, as soon as Lombardi gets off this headphones go on and he starts dancing all the way to the plane.

SHL S49 Game 261 - MIN @ SFP

SHL Game 261 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Joseph Lombardi @bluesfan55
Team: San Francisco Pride
Victim: Igor Volkov @TheHockeyist
Team: Minnesota Chiefs
Time: 15:53 of 1st period
Total possession time: 15:53
Hot po-take-to: As Lombardi moon walks his way around the ice he accidentally bumps into Igor Volkov and the potato gets passed to him. Volkov thoughts are filled with the usual Russian thoughts vodka, bears, hammers , the cold, and planets. Volkov continues to play like nothing is effecting.

SHL Game 261 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Igor Volkov @TheHockeyist
Team: Minnesota Chiefs
Victim: Knute Knurtsson @Ason94
Team: San Francisco Pride
Time: 6:52 of 3rd period
Total possession time: 30:59
Hot po-take-to: As Volkov thinks about planets and moons are made up of, he still has enough sanity to destroy Knute Knurtsson. Knurtsson's mind suddenly fills up with images of nuts. He can smell roasted nuts around the stadium so he skates off and jumps over boards and into the crowd. He quickly finds a vendor and buys all of the nuts they have, as he stuffs his cheeks he's got a look of pure joy on his face.

SHL Game 261 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Knute Knurtsson @Ason94
Team: San Francisco Pride
Victim: N/A
Team: Minnesota Chiefs
Time: N/A
Total possession time: 13:08
Hot po-take-to: Knurtsson keeps the potato for the rest of the game and by the end of it he has fully become a squirrel. He continues to nibble on his nuts and starts making squeaking noises. At the end of the game the Pride have to figure out if they are going to simply drag him off the ice or will they need to call in animal control.

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Rest In Peace Dangel

1st SHL Goal - S52 Game 1 vs Tampa 3. New England Wolfpack , Jakub Bruchevski 1 (Eko Van Otter 1, Delver Fudgeson 2) at 8:10

Scarecrows

TheHockeyist · 08-23-2019, 06:25 PM

Hydrogen and helium and hydrogen and helium and hydrogen and helium and hydr- wait, what?

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