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***FuzzSHL*** · 05-21-2020, 07:45 PM

It’s been a while since I’ve allowed myself to be present in the media. The last time the media heard from me, I was still down in St Louis, still not quite done celebrating our recent Four Star Cup victory. Things were different then. I was young and eager to make an impact on the league, to make my name as feared as the greats that came before me. I had been given a letter for one of the SMJHL’s most storied franchises as a player with zero prior ties to the league. Everything was looking up, and then...radio silence.

It’s time to break that silence.

Life in the SHL hasn’t been as much of a fairy tale as they made it out to be. It was hard work even just to crack the lineup as a rookie and it was even harder to stay there. No one tells you about the pressure to succeed, the pressure to live up to expectations. Some players have the luxury of not having many expectations to live up to. One of the benefits you get of getting drafted late is that there is none of that pressure to succeed. If you do, you’re looked at as a steal. If you burn out, they say “Well at least they got to where they did, pretty good for someone who went so late.” If you never make it past draft day, well, there really wasn’t much lost. If you’re a first round pick? A second? The pressure is immense. There’s pressure to make your team not regret drafting someone else, there’s pressure to stay ahead of the people behind you. It’s all too easy to push yourself to your breaking point mentally, physically, emotionally.

And when you inch close to that point, the cycle begins.

At first it’s small things: missing some training, a team meeting here and there. It’s not a big deal, right? Then your play starts taking a hit. Your shooting percentage dips, you’re making more turnovers than normal, your progression stalls and suddenly you’re not on the path you once were. The game you once loved and found easy suddenly became work. You begin to ask yourself, is this even worth it? What am I even doing?

The offseasons since getting called up have been rough. I questioned my future in hockey and at one point almost made the call to hang up the skates. The media kept calling, kept asking..

“Is this next season the one where you finally break out?”

“What are your plans to bounce back?”

It was too much. I wasn’t too far gone, thankfully I still knew that despite the struggles to take that next step. To a large group of people it probably seems as if I let the pressure of the draft and the media and the expectations get to me too easily. They’re probably right. Regardless of whether its true or not, though, it happened. I stalled, and the results showed. I needed a break from it all. I needed radio silence.

Since then, I’ve found my footing once again. I’ve rediscovered that drive, that passion, that desire to keep pushing forward. I’ve since led the league in +/- and set new career highs in goals and assists. I had the best shooting season I had this last season since my time in juniors. I made the USA international roster and have won two Gold Medals. I’m finally finding my groove on the ice, finding the role that truly feels right.

I may not be the same bright-eyed rookie that wanted to take the league by storm anymore. The person that I have grown to become, though, is a much better version of myself than I ever thought to be possible. I have so many people to thank for that, but that’s a subject for another day.

For now, the silence has been broken.

Aleksi Kettu

**_Blitz_** · 05-21-2020, 07:53 PM

USA Gold Medal Game Hero, Michael Fox!

Usa

Huck24 · 05-22-2020, 12:46 AM

*CementHands* · 05-22-2020, 01:17 AM

Well this is a wholesome read, thank you Fuzz Smile

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