Login

Pythonic · 09-16-2020, 09:35 PM

x2 draft media
Note: I am so very sorry, graders. Had to get one more article in.

----

From the absolute mogul of writing media, Pythonic, who has brought you such great gems such as 'Kauppinen and the SHL Draft' as well as the 'Whalers News Network', we are proud to introduce you to the:

BARRACUDA NEWS NETWORK

Once more, another great draft has come and gone. As opposed to this article being centered around the Simulation Major Junior Hockey League draft, it is now about the Simulation Hockey League's latest draft, and boy was it a deep one. All of the great rookies who played in the fifty fifth season in the SMJHL are now moving up to the big leagues, or at least getting drafted to an SHL team. This time, we're taking a look my favorite team, which is totally the Tampa Bay Barracuda, and I'm not sure why anyone would think that I'm lying about that. I'm a very honest person, and I have a great relationship with the Tampa Bay Barracuda. I have great respect for them. I love them, and they love me. Anyway, let's get into the draft review, starting with a big one, literally:

FIRST ROUND, FIRST OVERALL
Alexander Kozlov - 402 TPE
With the first overall pick in the first round, the head staff in Tampa Bay elected to choose a forward in 6 foot 2 inch tall centerman Alexander Kozlov, native of St. Petersburg, Russia. Flappy, to me, seems like the kind of guy you can rely on to be active in the locker room. As of writing this article, he has 402 TPE, and that's before the regular season even begins. Kozlov seems to be the type of player you can rely on to be competent at both ends of the ice, while also being relatively speedy in trying to get to either side. Flappy has a bank account of well over $105,000,000 so his monetary needs are definitely not a concern as he can afford weekly training and coaching all the same. Staples of Kozlov's game are definitely his puck handling efforts. He seems to be a pass first kind of guy, with both 12 in getting open and passing. His shot is definitely not anything to write home about, however he may be able to score a good numbers of goals over the season. It seems to me his build is that of a pass-first two way forward at this point in time. Of course, I could be absolutely wrong about this, as Flappy could end up going down the route of a more playmaking style. All in all, Kozlov was definitely the right guy to pick with the first pick in the season fifty six draft. On a scale of 1 to 10, this pick is a solid 10, easily.

FIRST ROUND, SIXTH OVERALL
Vladmir Petrov - 406 TPE
Another Russian! I guess the 'Russian Factor' in the Simulation Hockey League is 'if you're Russian, you're going to go in the first round.' This time, at sixth overall, the Barracuda picked up the first member of the Petrov dynasty in this draft, Vladmir Petrov, hometown of Nizhny Novgorod, Russia. Sitting at 406 TPE at the time of writing, Vladdy here is nothing to scoff at. He seems to be at least decent at everything, but what he really excels with is his passing and puck handling skills. Petrov doesn't really have any specific weaknesses that can be talked about, besides his defensive positioning, which can be much improved on in the future. Muford sits currently at nearly $9,000,000 in his bank, and having already purchased the max coaching for this season. The only thing that separates first overall and sixth overall TPE-wise is a few mock draft picks, or a pair of activity checks. I'm surprised Petrov didn't go earlier in the draft, honestly, he's a second or third overall talent. On a scale of 1 to 10, this pick is a good 8.5, pretty great stuff.

FIRST ROUND, TWELFTH OVERALL
KnockedOut ByOvechkin - 358 TPE
Once again, we have a Russian up in the first round - this time, none other than my teammate on the Vancouver Whalers, KnockedOut ByOvechkin! Making his home in Barnaul, Russia, KOBO bears an entirely striking resemblance to a guy who got knocked out by Alex Ovechkin... huh. Weird. Anyway, KOBO clocks in at a solid 358 TPE, just over the cap for his sophomore year in the major junior league. KOBO is definitely an all-around decent player, with no true weaknesses to speak of. KnockedOut's user, ddrector, has seriously gone for a truly average build for his player. He's good at both ends of the ice, and doesn't really excel at anything in particular. Of course, this isn't at all a bad thing. Hockey teams need all-around good players to win. You can't plan on playing a bunch of pure offensive players and expecting to win, or vice versa with defensive players. Ddrector is also a pretty cool guy on top of all of this. From 1-10, this pick is a 9.

FIRST ROUND, SEVENTEENTH OVERALL
Philip Weaver - 377 TPE
He may not be Russian, but he's a goalie... which is kind of exactly what Tampa needs. Weaver is another all-around good player, this time though he's just an all-around good goalie as opposed to a skater. He excels in a lot of areas, and his stamina is admirable for a guy just coming out of the major juniors. His passing could use some work, but we don't see him play the puck very often in the first place. Where he truly is incredible is on rebound shots as well as with his reflexes. His reflexes on top of his positioning are just insane, and the combo alone makes him such a great pick for the Barracuda. Reviewing his highlights, I can't believe he didn't get drafted earlier by a team that needed a solid backup with starter potential in a few seasons. W19eaver is also a fresh user himself, if I'm right, which makes this all the more surprising. Definitely a 10 on the 'how good is this pick' scale.

SECOND ROUND, NINETEENTH OVERALL
Valtterri Kauppinen - 349 TPE
Oh, hey, look. It's my player. Wait, what? My player? What am I talking about? I feel like I just broke some kind of fourth wall I shouldn't have... well, if I disappear within 48 hours, don't look for me. I'm probably long gone into the cyber land of people who broke the fourth wall. Anyway, Oulu, Finland, native Valtterri Kauppinen is a player who exceeds on the offense - even if his defensive game is questionable at best. Kauppinen's game at the back end of the ice certainly isn't terrible, but it isn't anything to write home about and celebrate. However, from what I've seen at the Barracuda training rink, it's definitely improving. Of course, what we all probably know Kauppinen is best at is how speedy he is. Speaking of my recent visit to the rink, he set the rink lap speed record out of all current members of the Barracuda. He completed two laps in just twenty six seconds. His edgework and agility are also a great combination, and if he can translate his 11.11 shooting percentage into bigger minutes on the Whalers lineup he can definitely be a mean scorer for goalies to watch out for, as well as for when he makes it up to the Simulation Hockey League. I may be a bit biased, but a solid 9 out of 10 on this pick.

SECOND ROUND, THIRTY SIXTH OVERALL
Boris Petrov - 340 TPE
Hey, wasn't the big defense draft for Tampa Bay last season? Oh well, Petrov wasn't old enough back then to make it into that draft... wait, which Petrov am I talking about? Boris, right? Yeah, this one is Boris. You're telling me there's how many members of the Petrov family in this draft? Good lord... Anyway, Boris Petrov is another defenseman picked up by the Barracuda. Boris has been earning his TPE at a steady rate, and has enough money in his bank account to pay for three full weeks of +5 training. I expect that we're going to see some media or other money-earning from him soon, so it's nothing the Cuda should be too worried about. He does lack in TPE a small bit, but again, nothing to be too entirely worried about. 7 out of 10 on the pick scale.

I say it's about time we call this article here. It was a good write, but there's really nothing special past the second round. Who did we pick up again? Supernaw and Lemme Smash? Pair of weirdos those guys are...

----

And that just about ends this article on the Barracuda News Network. This draft was probably the best one in the past few season, maybe second to last season's draft. The Barracuda are definitely going to be a team that the Simulation Hockey League is going to want to watch out for maybe four, five seasons in the future as their depth chart is deep. Deeper than the National Hockey League's Colorado Avalanche or Buffalo Sabres. And, unlike either team, the management here in Tampa Bay doesn't suck toad! Imagine that? The Barracuda are absolutely going to be a serious championship caliber team six seasons from now at the worst. This draft brought them a bunch of active earners all around. This is Barracuda News Network, shutting down... for now. We wish you a good night, and a good end to the double media earning craze.

Rangerjase · 09-16-2020, 09:41 PM

peej2189 · 09-16-2020, 09:47 PM

YEEEEAAAAAH LETS GO CUDA

rum_ham · 09-16-2020, 10:10 PM

Navigation

Extra Menu

About us