id fuck the shit out of the goldfish cracker from the television ads

you would too you slut

https://simulationhockey.com/showthread.php?tid=130731

The Minnesota Chiefs are happy to select

Ebenezer Virtanen


Welcome to Minnesota @Zeddez

         

Oh shiiit now that's something to wake up to!!! Woot woooootttt

Either you live in Hawaii or you a lazy fuck. Wake up earlier lol

im a lazy fuck not gonna lie

With the 35th pick the Winnipeg Jets select:

Bjornoson Bjornosonson
Halifax Raiders
Forward

Welcome to the team @HyperboleJoe!

Former Agent of Nick Brain: Center/Right Winger -   

With the 46th overall pick, the Hamilton Steelhawks are proud to select...


Elle Rush @SlothFaceThrilla

Bonjou! welcome to the team!

Ben Waters Jr. || LW || Edmonton Blizzard || 312 TPE
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 225 lbs
Birthplace: Montreal, Canada

Transactions
S64: Drafted by Kelowna Knights with the 24th overall pick in S64 SMJHL Entry Draft

Stats

Awards




Player Page
Update Page

you would too you slut

That's it, young man, I'm taking away your Xbox.

Zach Evans[/b] | Player Page | Update Page
Nikolai Evans | Player Page | Update Page
Zach Evans || Forward || Winnipeg Jets
Name: Zach Evans
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 195 lbs
Number: 18
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Career Statistics:
S32 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 9, A: 5, P: 14, +/-: -1, PIMS: 12, H: 59
S33 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 8, A: 15, P: 23, +/-: 3, PIMS: 49, H: 106
S34 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 14, A: 14, P: 28, +/-: 7, PIMS: 46, H: 96
S35 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 22, A: 26, P: 48, +/-: -4, PIMS: 23, H: 113
S36 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 28, A: 30, P: 58, +/-: 23, PIMS: 51, H: 140
S37 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 24, A: 27, P: 51, +/-: 2, PIMS: 36, H: 220
S38 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 27. A: 38, P: 65, +/-: 12, PIMS: 45, H: 158
S39 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 15, A: 32, P: 47, +/-: 11, PIMS: 43, H: 85
S40 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 22, A: 31, P: 53, +/-: 11, PIMS: 15, H: 49
S41 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 27, A: 35, P: 62, +/-: 26, PIMS: 34, H: 82
S42 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 16, A: 29, P: 45, +/-: -3, PIMS: 15, H: 6
S43 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 16, A: 29, P: 45, +/-: 11, PIMS: 27, H: 15
S44 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 14, A: 31, P: 45, +/-: 3, PIMS: 17, H: 17
S45 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 15, A: 34, P: 49, +/-: 4, PIMS: 2, H: 27
CAREER: GP: 700, G: 257, A: 376, P: 633, +/-: 105, PIMS: 415, H: 1,173
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Playoff Statistics:
S34 (WPG): GP: 5, G: 2, A: 1, P: 3, +/-: 0, PIMS: 4, H: 7
S36 (WPG): GP: 6, G: 0, A: 3, P: 3, +/-: -1, PIMS: 0, H: 16
S37 (WPG): GP: 18, G: 11, A: 14, P: 25, +/-: 19, PIMS: 12, H: 81
S38 (WPG): GP: 13, G: 6, A: 9, P: 15, +/-: 5, PIMS: 4, H: 32
S39 (WPG): GP: 13, G: 5, A: 6, P: 11, +/-: -2, PIMS: 6, H: 31
S40 (WPG): GP: 14, G: 5, A: 4, P: 9, +/-: 1, PIMS: 13, H: 7
S41 (WPG): GP: 13, G: 8, A: 6, P: 14, +/-: 3, PIMS: 9, H: 26
S43 (WPG): GP: 17, G: 4, A: 9, P: 13, +/-: 11, PIMS: 2, H: 4
S44 (WPG): GP: 18, G: 4, A: 15, P: 19, +/-: 7, PIMS: 0, H: 3
S45 (WPG): GP: 4, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -1, PIMS: 0, H: 2
CAREER: GP: 121, G: 46, A: 69, P: 115, +/-: 41, PIMS: 50, H: 209
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Career Statistics:
S30 (DET): GP: 50, G: 16, A: 12, P: 28, +/-: 8, PIMS: 10, H: 44
S31 (DET): GP: 50, G: 15, A: 23, P: 38, +/-: -2, PIMS: 35, H: 84
CAREER: GP: 100, G: 31, A: 35, P: 66, +/-: 6, PIMS: 45, H: 128
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Playoff Statistics:
S30 (DET): GP: 5, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -1, PIMS: 2, H: 0
S31 (DET): GP: 13, G: 5, A: 7, P: 12, +/-: 3, PIMS: 0, H: 9
CAREER: GP: 18, G: 5, A: 8, P: 13, +/-: 2, PIMS: 2, H: 9
------------------------------------------------------------
IIHF Statistics (Russia):
S30: GP: 11, G: 1, A: 0, P: 1, +/-: -1, PIMS: 0, H: 7
S32: GP: 13, G: 1, A: 1, P: 2, +/-: -4, PIMS: 4, H: 17
S33: GP: 11, G: 3, A: 6, P: 9, +/-: 5, PIMS: 4, H: 12
S34: GP: 11, G: 6, A: 2, P: 8, +/-: 2, PIMS: 2, H: 10
S35: GP: 13, G: 5, A: 4, P: 9, +/-: 4, PIMS: 18, H: 22
S36: GP: 11, G: 4, A: 3, P: 7, +/-: -3, PIMS: 2, H: 5
S37: GP: 10, G: 1, A: 1, P: 2, +/-: 0, PIMS: 0, H: 8
S38: GP: 13, G: 3, A: 10, P: 13, +/-: 8, PIMS: 4, H: 5
S39: GP: 10, G: 6, A: 6, P: 12, +/-: 1, PIMS: 2, H: 11
S40: GP: 10, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -6, PIMS: 2, H: 8
S41: GP: 11, G: 4, A: 5, P: 9, +/-: 0, PIMS: 2, H: 7
S42: GP: 10, G: 5, A: 9, P: 14, +/-: 5, PIMS: 0, H: 1
S43: GP: 13, G: 4, A: 7, P: 11, +/-: 6, PIMS: 0, H: 0
S44: GP: 10, G: 4, A: 8, P: 12, +/-: 1, PIMS: 0, H: 0
S45: GP: 10, G: 6, A: 1, P: 7, +/-: -13, PIMS: 0, H: 2
CAREER: GP: 167 G: 54, A: 65, P: 119, +/-: 5, PIMS: 40, H: 105
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions and Awards:
Drafted 25th overall by Detroit, S30 SMJHL Entry Draft
S30 Vyacheslav Onoprienko Trophy Winner
Drafted 5th overall by Winnipeg, S31 SHL Entry Draft
S32 Oriens Trophy Winner (Co-GM, Detroit)
S32 IIHF Bronze Medalist
S36 SHL Second-Team All-Star
S37 Challenge Cup Champion
S38 Sergei Karpotsov Trophy Winner
S38 SHL First-Team All-Star
S38 Sarmad Khan Trophy Winner
S38 Jeff Dar Trophy Winner
S38 Damian Littleton Trophy Winner
S38 IIHF Gold Medalist
S43 IIHF Silver Medalist
S44 Challenge Cup Champion
Inducted into SHL Hall of Fame, S47
------------------------------------------------------------
Two things are infinite.

Nikolai Evans || Defenseman || HAM/TBB/TEX
Name: Nikolai Evans
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 210 lbs
Number: 19
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Career Statistics:
S47 (HAM): GP: 50, G: 1, A: 10, P: 11, +/-: -4, SB: 39, H: 32
S48 (HAM): GP: 50, G: 5, A: 9, P: 14, +/1: 6, SB: 57, H: 37
S49 (TBB): GP: 50, G: 9, A: 14, P: 23, +/-: -22, SB: 78, H: 51
S50 (TBB): GP: 50, G: 7, A: 20, P: 27, +/-: 4, SB: 64, H: 39
CAREER: GP: 200, G: 22, A: 53, P: 75, +/-: -16, SB: 238, H: 159
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Playoff Statistics:
S48 (HAM): GP: 5, G: 1, A: 0, P: 1, +/-: -1, SB: 6, H: 3
S49 (TBB): GP: 12, G: 0, A: 5, P: 5, +/-: 0, SB: 20, H: 8
S50 (TBB): GP: 19, G: 5, A: 7, P: 12, +/-: 1, SB: 29, H: 6
CAREER: GP: 36, G: 6, A: 12, P: 18, +/-: 0, SB: 55, H: 17
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Career Statistics:
S45 (MTL): GP: 50, G: 7, A: 13, P: 20, +/-: -1, SB: 60, H: 25
S46 (MTL/HFX): GP: 50, G: 7, A: 20, P: 27, +/-: -1, SB: 47, H: 68
CAREER: GP: 100, G: 14, A: 33, P: 47, +/-: -2, SB: 107, H: 93
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Playoff Statistics:
S45 (MTL): GP: 6, G: 2, A: 3, P: 5, +/-: -1, SB: 7, H: 4
S46 (HFX): GP: 13, G: 3, A: 2, P: 5, +/-: -4, SB: 18, H: 14
CAREER: GP: 19, G: 5, A: 5, P: 10, +/-: -5, SB: 25, H: 18
------------------------------------------------------------
IIHF Statistics (Russia):
S45: GP: 10, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -5, SB: 12, H: 2
S46: GP: 12, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -2, SB: 11, H: 2
S47: GP: 12, G: 2, A: 7, P: 9, +/-: 2, SB: 17, H: 12
S48: GP: 12, G: 2, A: 4, P: 6, +/-: -6, SB: 22, H: 0
S49: GP: 15, G: 6, A: 6, P: 12, +/-: -6, SB: 25, H: 7
CAREER: GP: 61, G: 10, A: 19, P: 29, +/-: -17, SB: 87, H: 23
------------------------------------------------------------
WJC Statistics:
S44 (World): GP: 15, G: 6, A: 7, P: 13, +/-: 8, SB: 18, H: 13
S45 (Russia): GP: 22, G: 2, A: 10, P: 12, +/-: -13, SB: 33, H: 14
S46 (Russia): GP: 28, G: 9, A: 15, P: 23, +/-: 0, SB: 26, H: 14
CAREER: GP: 55, G: 17, A: 32, P: 48, +/-: -5, SB: 77, H: 41
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions and Awards:
Drafted 1st overall by Montreal, S45 SMJHL Entry Draft
Drafted 1st overall by Hamilton, S46 SHL Entry Draft
Traded to Halifax Raiders during S46 SMJHL season
Traded to Tampa Bay Barracuda prior to S49 SHL season
S48 Fantasy Global Champion
S50 Mathias Chouinard Trophy Winner
I'll finish updating this at some point
------------------------------------------------------------
The Russian Prince

Zdenko Beranek || Winger || Quebec City Citadelles
Name: Zdenko Beranek
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 175 lbs
Number: 27
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Career Statistics:
S55 (QCC): GP: 50, G: 6, A: 15, P: 21, +/-: -22, PIMS: 6
S56 (QCC): GP: 50, G: 10, A: 27, P: 37, +/-: 9, PIMS: 20
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions and Awards:
Drafted 1st overall by Quebec City, S55 SMJHL Entry Draft
Drafted 18th overall by Seattle, S56 SHL Entry Draft
------------------------------------------------------------
Le Petite Chèvre

With the 46th overall pick, the Hamilton Steelhawks are proud to select...


Elle Rush @SlothFaceThrilla

Bonjou! welcome to the team!

We are now a more diverse team!

 ||

NeverBrokeAgain YoungBoy || D || Vancouver Whalers || Hamilton Steelhawks

Drafted 6th overall to the Vancouver Whalers in S59
Drafted 39th overall to the Hamilton Steelhawks in S60
S59 Esa Anrikkanen Trophy winner (best rookie)

S59: GP: 66 | G: 11 | A: 23 | P: 34 | +/-: -11 | PIM: 10 | SB: 33 | Hits: 48 | CF%: 52.7 | CF%R: 11.3
S60: GP: | G: | A: | P: | +/-: | PIM: | SB: | Hits: | CF%: | CF%R:

The Minnesota Chiefs are happy to select

Lando Norris


Welcome to Minnesota @BreDoubleT

         





And Jon Forfeit @Shmurph

With the 51st Overall Pick the Winnipeg Jets select.......

Ville Virta
Detroit Falcons
Forward

Welcoem to the team @CKT !

Former Agent of Nick Brain: Center/Right Winger -   

I'm not even worth a separate post :(

With the 52nd overall pick, the Chicago Syndicate are proud to select...

Biggus Lickus - @6ympathy

Welcome to Chicago!

Käri Bärköv || LW || Calgary Dragons || RETIRED  
Age: 18
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 175 lbs
Number: 93
------------------------------------------------------------
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 175 lbs
>Number: 93
------------------------------------------------------------
Regular Season Statistics:
S10 VAN: GP: 40 G: 29 A: 25 P: 54 +/-: 21 H: 77 PIM: 42
S11 CHI:   GP: 40 G: 16 A: 14 P: 30 +/-: -39 H: 66 PIM: 10
S12 CGY: GP: 50 G: 5 A: 6 P: 11 +/-: -16 H: 57 PIM: 2
S13 CGY: GP: 50 G: 8 A: 13 P: 21 +/-: 20 H: 34 PIM: 24  
S14 CGY: GP: 50 G: 13 A: 13 P: 26 +/-: 5 H: 73 PIM: 32
S15 CGY: GP: 50 G: 10 A: 31 P: 41 +/-: 5 H: 128 PIM: 54
S16 CGY: GP: 50 G: 19 A: 15 P: 34 +/-: 0 H: 97 PIM: 16
S17 CGY: GP: 50 G: 23 A: 25 P: 48 +/-: +6 H: 136 PIM: 17
S18 CGY: GP: 50 G: 14 A: 21 P: 35  +/-: -11 H: 130 PIM: 32
S19 CGY: GP: 50 G: 16 A: 17 P: 33 +/-: +4 H: 143 PIM: 47
S20 CGY: GP: 50 G: 20 A: 26  P: 46 +/-: +14 H: 113 PIM: 32
S21 CGY: GP: 50 G: 12 A: 19 P: 31 +/-: 4 H: 146 PIM: 76
S22 CGY/EDM: GP: 51 G: 10 A: 12 P: 22 +/-: -7 H: 102
PIM: 43

------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Statistics:
S10 VAN: GP: 12 G: 6 A: 9 P: 15 +/-: 6 H: 28 PIM: 25 FO: 50.00%
S11 CHI:  GP: 6 G: 5 A: 4 P: 9 +/-: 2 H: 12 PIM: 2
S12 CGY: GP: 4 G: 0 A: 2 P: 2 +/-: 3 H: 4 PIM: 0  
S13 CGY: GP: 11 G: 2 A: 1 P: 3 +/-: 4 H: 6 PIM: 4  
S14 CGY: GP: 6 G: 1 A: 1 P: 2 +/-: -3 H: 13 PIM: 10
S15 CGY: GP: 14 G: 2 A: 3 P: 5 +/-: -1 H: 28 PIM: 12
S16 CGY: GP: 11 G: 7 A: 7 P: 14 +/-: 5 H: 29 PIM: 2
S17 CGY: GP: 6 : G: 3 A: 3 P: 6 =/-: +0 H: 26
PIM: 0
S18 CGY: GP: 4 G: 3 A: 0 P: 3 +/-: -1 H: 10 PIM: 0
S19 CGY: GP: 7 G: 2 A: 1 P: 3 +/- 0 H: 16 PIM: 8
S22 CGY: GP: 12 G: 0 A: 2 P: 2 +/-: 6 H:19 PIM: 12
------------------------------------------------------------
IHF Statistics:
WJC Finland Season 10: GP: 14 G: 5 A: 2 P: 7 +/-: -13 H: 17 PIM: 4
WJC Finland Season 11: GP:9 G: 5 A: 6 P: 11 +/-: -5 PIM: 2
IHF Finland (career totals): GP: 35 G: 13 A: 19 P: 32 +/-: +4 H: 64  PIM: 8
------------------------------------------------------------
[pbl]Transactions:
Signed with Vancouver Whalers for 2 Million
Named Assistant Captain of the Vancouver Whalers
Drafted 22nd overall by the Calgary Dragons in the S11 SHL Entry Draft
Signed 3 year 11 million ELC with Calgary Dragons
Named Assistant Captain of the Chicago Hitmen
Named CO-GM of the Vancouver Whalers
Named CO-GM of the Calgary Dragons
Named Head GM of the Calgary Dragons
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards:
S10 NWJHL Championship
S10 IHF WJ Bronze Medal
Season 11 Michael Haan trophy winner for most dedicated player
Season 13 IHF Silver Medal
Season 13 JJ Krever award for best GM (shared with Kain Webb)
Season 13 IHF Silver Medal
Season 14 JJ Krever runner up
Season 14 IHF Silver Medal
Season 15 Aidan Richan winner
Season 17 First All-Star Team
Season 17 Aidan Richan winner
Season 18 IHF Bronze Medal
Season 18 Damian Littleton Nominee

------------------------------------------------------------

Parker Smeb || RD || Chicago Syndicate || 1473 TPE
SMJHL Regular Season Statistics:
S45 COL: GP: 50 G: 14 A: 13 P: 27 +/-: 9 H: 68 SB: 5
S46 COL:  GP: 40 G: 22 A: 19 P: 41 +/-: 2 H: 127 SB: 3
SMJHL Play-Off Statistics:
S45 COL: GP: 16 G: 6 A: 4 P: 10 +/-: 8 H: 13 SB: 0
S46 COL: GP: 7 G: 2 A: 0 P: 2  +/-: 1 H: 20 SB: 3
SHL Regular Season Statistics:
S47 CHI: GP: 50 G: 10 A: 18 P: 28 +/-: -12 H: 138 SB: 11
S48 CHI: 50 G: 8 A: 9 P: 17 +/-: -19 H: 119 SB: 8  
S49 CHI: GP: 50 G: 14 A: 20 P: 34 +/-: 5 H: 77 SB: 15
SHL Play-Off Statistics
S47 CHI: GP: 9 G: 1 A: 3 P: 4 +/-: -3 H: 9 SB: 0
International Statistics:
S45 WJ WOR GP: 21 G: 4 A: 5 P: 9 +/-: -1 H: 51 SB: 3
S46 WJ WOR GP: 30 G: 11 A: 7 P: 18 +/-: -5 H: 62 SB: 4
S47 JPN GP: 12 G: 5 A: 2 P: 7 +/-: -4 H: 34 SB: 4
S48 JPN GP: 12 G: 4 A: 3 P: 7 +/-: -9 H: 50 SB: 4
S49 JPN GP: 12 G: 4 A: 1 P: 5 +/-:+2 H: 37 SB: 4
CAREER: GP: 87 G: 28 A: 18 P: 46 +/-: -17 H: 234 SB: 19




------------------------------------------------------------

"“HA HA! THIS GAME WILL NEVER END! I POSSESS THE SOUL OF EVERY GOALIE ON TEAM B!! CREW 4 LIFE!! SIGN WITH EDMONTON FOR THE CUP!!!” cackled Belial as he placed a Fedora on his head."
SMJHL Commisioner S17-S26
Calgary Dragons GM S14-S23

I have a call from the Tampa Bay Barracuda.

With the 63rd pick, Tampa Bay selects Max Davidson @RippleLuck

LW - Rainbow Dash - Updates
[img=0x0]https://i.imgur.com/eM6YKiW.gif[/img]
Rainbow Dash Fan S24-Present
SHL Commissioner S34-S52
New England Wolfpack GM S30-S40
Montreal Milita Co-GM S26-S29

I'm not even worth a separate post :(

Get some more TPE and i might edit

We have a trade to announce!

Receive:

67th Overall

Receive:

69th Overall

Nice.

LW - Rainbow Dash - Updates
[img=0x0]https://i.imgur.com/eM6YKiW.gif[/img]
Rainbow Dash Fan S24-Present
SHL Commissioner S34-S52
New England Wolfpack GM S30-S40
Montreal Milita Co-GM S26-S29

We have a trade to announce!

Receive:

67th Overall

Receive:

69th Overall

Nice.

Chris McZehrl III - Anchorage Armada


Challenge Cup Wins:
S18 - Seattle Riot (with Chris McZehrl)*
S23 - New England Wolfpack (with Chris McZehrl)*
S27 - Calgary Dragons (with VLAD McZehrl)**
S34 - Manhattan Rage (with VLAD McZehrl)
S37 - Winnipeg Jets (with VLAD McZehrl)
S46 - Buffalo Stampede (with GOD McZehrl)*

*first ever Challenge Cup of Franchise History
**first ever Challenge Cup win after 0-3 in Finals Series

Four Star Cup Wins:
S24 - Vancouver Whalers (with VLAD McZehrl)
S39 - St. Louis Scarecrows (with GOD McZehrl)

SHL Hall of Fame Members:
S24 - Chris McZehrl *
(GP: 764 | G: 322 | A: 461 | P: 783 | +/-: +109)
S40 - VLAD McZehrl *
(GP: 653 | G: 333 | A: 361 | P: 694 | +/-: +141)

*1st Ballot Hall of Famer

small note: GOD McZehrl played at first as Defender and later as Forward!