Ladies and Gentlemen, glorps and borks! I am extremely excited and happy to announce that the San Francisco Pride will be arranging their first every fantasy camp! This is a full two-day experience for you or your entire family. A single ticket to the event will set you back a very affordable $1000 dollars while a family package, which includes tickets for two adults and two children, costs $2500 dollars. Season ticket holders will receive a 10% discount on these prices. Included in this package is one night at the Hyatt Place hotel, a jersey, a lunch event where you will get to meet the players and prospects of the San Francisco Pride. You will also get to watch the players during a practice on the first day as well as a full-length scrimmage after which the players will be available to sign autographs and answer questions. The second day will include a breakfast as well as a presentation by management that will go over some of the future plans for the team as well as other interesting titbits. Your experience will finish with a 90 minute lunch event where you will enjoy the company of players and staff from the team where you will be able to ask questions in a more familial setting.
The Anchorage Armada are happy to announce their brand new off season life skills camp! Instead of a regular old boring hockey camp you'll be exposed to the king shit of fuck mountain experience. For the entirely reasonable price of $20,000 per head (we have gambling debts to pay) you'll be treated to:
6 nights in the back of Chad Johnson's @DaftRainclouds van
A once in a lifetime basket weaving course with Peter Larson @Tomasnz
All finished off with a ted talk on winning mentality with Mikhail Lokitonov @ml002
Act quickly to secure your place as we expect it to sell out more or less instantly and it is highly likely that this is the one and only chance you'll have to be involved in this incredible experience.
Credit to Ml002, King, Wasty, Carpy, Bruins10, Rum_Ham, Turd Ferguson, Ragnar and Enigmatic for the sigs.
If Dragons would make such a Fantasy Camp then I think most if not even all our alumni would go to this amazing event. Nathan D’Angelo, Tony Falone, Waldo Cezar, Ryan Jesster is always close to team events so he must absolutely arrive, Trevor Smith, Aidan Richan, Reggie Williams, Erik Chisling would be chrushing to arrive, Ron Bolt, Kain Webb is very supportive for team events so he must be too, Kari Barkov I think never leaves Big Parm, he msut be living somewhere in section C, Vlad Smirnov would never miss a drinking party, Sachimo Zoidberg is now more socially active after his relative is playing SMJHL, Wong probably won’t arrive because he must be somewhere in middle of Pacific Ocean with his best goalie awards and Playboy chicks, Michael Boychuk is around in town, he must say a hi atleast, Nicholas Pedersen and Junior must arrive on this particular event, Mack will go if there will be a poker night, Schnitinfritz Jagr won’t be going because he is working in Czech Republic streets with camera and money, Randy Randleman will go if Esa Anrikkanen will go but since Esa has chicken-parm Friday they both won’t be, Labsvards is in Latvia in retirement home and saying that alien kidnapped him so we probably don’t want him anyway. There will be chicken parm. Oh wait… Arikkanen texted that he will come. There will be poker… Now Mack approved he is going too. There will be barely legal hookers… Ohh wait. Schnitinfritz texted that he is going too. BBQ……. I’m sorry looks like all active roster send messeges that they are coming. Atendees will get personal dragons jersey which they can use in game with alumnis. And we have a secret. Secret guest Giorgio Tsoukalos…. Oh wait…. Labsvards texted he bought a tickets to Calgary!
Welcome to the first annual Calgary Dragons fantasy camp. For the low low price of 2499 you can become a part of the most esteemed franchise in the SHL. Meet famous GM Esa Anrikkannen, past Dragons greats such as Mike Izzy, Joe K, Randy Randleman and many others. Play and practice against current Dragons members. Go out for a night on the town with Otis B. Driftwood and some of his many women "friends", have a drink or 40 with Maxime Bouchard and Barry Batsbak, enjoy a nice meal cooked by goaltender Kata Vilde. Be amazed by the size when you see the Parm Pigeon up close and personal. See firsthand the legendary Izzy Couch. All this and more can be experienced at the Dragons fantasy camp, dont be late, spots are filling up fast so make sure that you secure yours as this is an experience that can not be missed.
The Toronto North Stars are hosting a fantasy camp featuring the following players:
Axel Meszaros, Harry Carpet, Rhys Pritchard, Ryosuke Sato and Russlan Zaporozhet
Axel meszaros is showing the players how to be a good bender and suck at scoring.
Harry Carpet is showing them how to carry a team on your own and get addicted to coffee.
Rhys Pritchard is showing the players how to be an old fart. In this he shows em how to sleep the whole day, be a boomer and wear white socks with sandals. As this is a really hard thing to learn Ryosuke Sato will give the attendees a start into this course because he was teached well by Rhys Pritchard.
Last but not least is Russlan Zaporozhet, he will hit the bars with all the attendees to get them drunk after a hard day so they can cool off accordingly.
This whole expirience will cost the attendees 1000 dollars without the hotel and the drinks.
The Calgary Dragons are having a unique fantasy camp this year. Unique in the fact it has nothing to do with hockey. For a donation to the local food pantry, fans will be given:
A goody bag with the following:
A chicken parmesan dinner for 8 at Calgary's best Italian restaurant Cucina Market Bistro
4 bottles of Belvedere Bloody Mary Vodka
A signed copy of Kata Vilde's cookbook Cooking with Kata
But the greatest aspect of the fantasy camp is chicken parm cooking lessons. Kata Vilde and Esa Parmborg will be on hand to share their recipes but amazingly Kata Vilde has called in some favors from some celebrity chefs. Emeril Lagasse, Mario Battali, Bobby Flay and Gordom Ramsay will all be there to help the campers learn how to create the most amazing chicken parmesan. Each camper will be able to choose one of these 6 chefs if you can call Vilde and Parmborg chefs and work one on one with them to create their most delectable chicken parms. Each camper's apron will be signed by their chosen chef for a lifetime momento of this special edition fantasy camp. And there will be a chicken parm eating contest for one lucky camper who will go head to head with Esa Parmborg in a competitive eating contest. If they can beat the Parmborg they will receive a lifetime pass to the Big Parm for every singlr Dragon's home game. Ciao for now.
The half-Everest Colorado Raptors Fantasy Camp offers a unique experience right atop of Colorado's highest peak: Mount Elbert. The highest North American summit of the Rocky Mountains stands tall with an elevation of 4401 meters (14 440 feet), which is almost exactly half that of the Mount Everest (8848 meters). The beautiful view will compensate for the crippling lack of oxygen every morning when you get to do your morning training routine with famous Colorado Raptors alumni like Cassius Darrow, Sven Svenson, Simothy Drunkbird, and many more! Training and playing outdoor hockey on the second-highest non-alaskan mountain in the United States will be hard, but well worth the 10 000$ (taxes included) you'll spend. Furthermore, you will get to choose one of the recent Colorado Raptors who made it to the SHL (JURT, Mack Daddy, Lord Raiden, Aumy Jr. or Gudmundur Kristjansson) and accompany them on a whole trip to one of their SHL team's games.
A one-off opportunity to participate in Fantasy Camp with the Seattle Hockey League. You'll have an opportunity to participate in team training, as well as play games with the team's best bets. Briefly on what is intended within this camp: 1. Chance to stay in one of the best hotels in town; 2. Get a superstar-worthy service; 3. Take training as a team for superstar; 4. Finally, a 3 vs3 match with the team's offensive leaders and a surprise gift with autographs.
The team's offensive forces will participate in this camp: Bo Kane, Frederick Wanesly, Thomas Vanice, Anastasia O'Koivu and Krišs Dārziņš These champions will also end up with a friendly game where two camp players will be assigned to each of them to play games. (In the case of a large number of participants, the format will be changed)
The camp's membership fee will be $700, which will be directed to charity.
In conclusion, the opportunity to bleed with the team's players, get their shirts, and a variety of other gifts from the team.
The Calgary dragons have teamed up with Boris to run fantasy camp this year! It will be focused around mixing the Calgary Dragons alumni and current players together for a holistic hockey experience that any fan wouldn't want to miss out on. The main stars of the camp will be alumni Esa Anrikkanen, Boris Poroshenko and Mike Izzy. In terms of the young up and coming current members of the Dragons who will be in attendance you will have Mack Daddy and Mats Marner. These two players are all a big part of the Dragons future as they are the future of the middle men for Calgary. The fantasy hockey camp will be four days long spanning from Friday until Monday for a fee of five hundred dollars with meals and activities included. On Friday there will be dry land training with the Dragons players and alumni and in the afternoon on ice skills training. On Saturday attendees will get to participate in the Dragons morning skate and watch the Dragons game live. On Sunday there will be a day of exploring the winter wonderland that is Calgary with the players. Lastly on monday you will participate in a 4v4 scrimmage with a shootout at the very end
First ever Yukon Malamute draft pick (1st overall S65)
12-12-2020, 02:39 PM(This post was last modified: 12-12-2020, 02:39 PM by Julio Tokolosh.)
Edmonton is giving back [Keygan's salary after not regressing Eddie Ask Jr.]!
The BEdmonton Blizzard front office has set up a fantasy camp for dedicated fans. For two thousand and five hundred dollar [wordcount!], guest are invited to participate in the experience of a lifetime.
In addition to box seats for the next battle of Alberta, the Blizzard are hosting the honored guests in the local 4 seasons with the following itinerary:
8-9: Breakfast with the Pros - Enjoy waffles, bacon, and bloody marys with the current roster and noted alumni
9-12: Practice - Watch Keygan and Tommy sim the shit out of scenarios.
12-1: Sim - Sim yourself! Plug yourself into your dream lines.
1-7: Lunch and Lectures - Enjoy cured meats and juice while listening to some of the active roster and alumni give lectures on:
- Tor Tuck: Bee Keeping and Me. Keeping the Boys Buzzing
- Tony Pepperoni: Spreadsheet Management. Clean Sheet of Ice
- Teddy Cuddles: Screenplay analysis of "The Town".
- Connor Tanner: How to be a hoot. Heroes of the Storm tutorial.
- Jean Paul Boivin: Art lessons. Happy little sigs.
7-midnight: Game and open bar
The Atlanta Inferno are offering the special Inferno experience, part of which will be highlighting those members of the Atlanta organization who have since moved on - it's a whopping 4 players on this list and all are featured extensively. Geoff Moore, Nolan Sawchunk, Guy O'Shea, and Keith Lee. This group of Atlanta legends will regale the crowd with tales about their time on the team. There may be a surprise visit from a current team member as well. In fact, the surprise was to the organizers as well, as Guy Zheng thought that he was the Guy who was supposed to show up to the camp and didn't realize it was supposed to be Guy O'Shea. But this will lead to fun times for the attendees as they can watch the Battle of the Guys where those two and any attendees who happen to be named Guy can participate in a suite of events to see who is the top Guy. All of this will run attendees about $3,000, half of which is donated to charity and half of which gets wired directly to Nolan Sawchunk's retirement fund.
The St. Louis Scarecrows are pleased to announce the first ever Scarecrow Fantasy Camp. Many teams in all different sports leagues have off season fantasy camps for their most dedicated fans to enjoy and now St. Louis has joined the fun. The camp, which is being run (and funded) by former player and GM Joe Kurczewski, will feature 3 fun filled weeks of practices, games, and skills learning. Campers who attend will be drafted into one of eight teams coached by former players Nicholas Williams, DeMaricus Smyth, Tigole Bitties, Mika Kandinsky, Brady McIntyre, Steven Moyer, Crossfit Jesus, and Aleister Cain. The eight teams will compete in different challenges which will determine the rankings for the tournament at the end of the camp, where the winning team will drop the puck at the home opener of the upcoming season. All attendees will receive autographed jersey, hats, pucks, and sticks. All of this, plus many exciting surprises all for the low low price of $5200 per person.
The Vancouver Whalers are excited to announce their first Fantasy Camp this season. Open to anyone and everyone, the Whalers Fantasy Camp is an unforgettable experience. This action packed weekend starts at the luxurious Rosewood Hotel Georgia located near the West End of Vancouver. Here you will spend 3 nights and enjoy the amenities such as a pool, spa and bar. The Pacific Colesium is where you will spend the most of your days at Fantasy Camp. Get the chance to meet Vancouver Alumnis like Robert Phelps, Jason Desrouleaux, Rotticus Scott and Jean-Paul Boivin. You’ll have access to pre-season training to watch as well as 2 home games to watch! What a weekend! At the end of the weekend everyone who participated receives a custom Vancouver Whalers jersey with a name and number of your choice. Whether you want a jersey of your favourite player or one with your own name the possibilities are endless.
Well, first of all, the Hamilton Steelhawks fantasy camp is your chance to tell Gabriel Johnson that he sucks and how much you hate him. Or maybe you're dreaming of becoming an SHL superstar but feel like you don't have the talent or work ethic? Then you're in luck because you can ask Tig Murphy how he won the Stevens and got multiple nominations throughout his career despite, frankly, being a pretty bad hockey player. Is Theo Morgan killing your fantasy team? We know the pain. Well, instead of yelling at your computer screen, you can yell at Theo in person! Maybe he will start playing better after that, you never know. Do you know any good short people jokes? Dale Miller would love to hear them, even if he tells you otherwise, we know he loves those. You will also get to meet budding superstars Rotticus Scott, Bork Lazer, Rikard Hammarberg, A Jobin and Guy O'Shea, plus alumni Ben Dover, Flacko Lagerfield and the recently retired fan-favorite Robert Phelps!
Muford![[Image: JvI8fTp.png]](https://i.imgur.com/JvI8fTp.png)
![[Image: 9tINabI.png]](https://i.imgur.com/9tINabI.png)
![[Image: c97iD9R.png]](https://i.imgur.com/c97iD9R.png)
![[Image: uDjThoa.png]](https://i.imgur.com/uDjThoa.png)
![[Image: 66624_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/66624_s.gif)
![[Image: 56096_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/56096_s.gif)
![[Image: wMGKypg.png]](https://i.imgur.com/wMGKypg.png)
![[Image: Bk1689.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/Bk1689.gif)
![[Image: iUd7IJE.png]](https://i.imgur.com/iUd7IJE.png)
![[Image: rhodes.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/694020619620188191/997234193056665711/rhodes.png)
![[Image: lespoils.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/lespoils.gif)
![[Image: zcOwSzN.png]](https://i.imgur.com/zcOwSzN.png)
![[Image: b1AwZLU.png]](https://i.imgur.com/b1AwZLU.png)
![[Image: ezgif-3-597e9990a5.png]](https://im3.ezgif.com/tmp/ezgif-3-597e9990a5.png)
![[Image: VGl3CB4.png]](https://i.imgur.com/VGl3CB4.png)
![[Image: petrov2.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/671882832578084866/871230208970215494/petrov2.png)
![[Image: muford_hof_sig.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/733472731638661202/765420902346522664/muford_hof_sig.png)
![[Image: Bananabread.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/Bananabread.gif)
![[Image: ekovanotter.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/ekovanotter.gif)
![[Image: connors.png]](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/694020619620188191/978699207168917504/connors.png)
![[Image: aawil.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/aawil.gif)
