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platanocat · 06-18-2021, 10:42 AM

Hi. I’m Wing Wang, the left wing wurmple. You may have heard of me. I play for the Nevada Battleborn in the SMJHL.

I’m here to talk to you about a rather personal problem. Sure, being a pro athlete definitely has it’s perks, but I suffer from chronic dry wurmple skin. For myself and many others, this condition can not only effect your love life, but your underlying confidence in day to day activities. That is, until now.

Now introducing Wurmple Wax from Wing Wang Enterprises. Wurmple Wax is an all natural, pharmacy grade wurmple moisturizer used to treat chronic dry wurmple. When applied directly to the wurmple, Wurmple Wax works it’s way into the pores, releasing soothing moisturizing particles and creating a protective layer all day. Wurmple Wax can be found in most major retailers or on the world wide web.

Wurmple Wax is an over the counter topical treatment for dry wurmple. Please seek medical attention if rash or hives appear. Not intended for pregnant or nursing wurmple. Wurmple Wax is intended to treat symptoms of dry wurmple, not cure it entirely.

Wurmple Wax by Wing Wang Enterprises. Isn’t it time you stopped living with chronic dry wurmple and just got back to living?

***sköldpaddor*** · 06-18-2021, 10:46 AM

i'm deeply intrigued by the implication here that wurmples are mammals

platanocat · 06-18-2021, 10:57 AM

06-18-2021, 10:46 AMsköldpaddor Wrote: i'm deeply intrigued by the implication here that wurmples are mammals

Oh, so only mammals get to feel the soothing relief of not having to suffer from chronic dry wurmple?

Alright.

***sköldpaddor*** · 06-18-2021, 11:43 AM

06-18-2021, 10:57 AMplatanocat Wrote:
06-18-2021, 10:46 AMsköldpaddor Wrote: i'm deeply intrigued by the implication here that wurmples are mammals
Oh, so only mammals get to feel the soothing relief of not having to suffer from chronic dry wurmple?

Alright.

I'm referring to the "Not for pregnant or nursing wurmple" warning, please do not insinuate that I am prejudiced against non-mammals. The Nevada Battleborn are an equal opportunity employer, rest assured.

Accka · 06-18-2021, 02:50 PM

Has Wurmple Wax by Wing Wang Enterprises been tested on animals? What about being cruelty free? What's the country of origin?

/

Big thanks to Pythonic(first sig evah), Sloth(first LAP sig<3) and Ragnar for their sigs<3

Three time playoffs MVP and two time nominee

Triple gold club

Discord: asska

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