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NJBadApple · 08-11-2023, 04:27 PM

First thing; right away I'm ordering an even more giant, oversized mascot head. That thing is already unearthly, and now it's going to be absurd. Having to jam it through doorways, knocking over children and adults alike as the mascot passes them. It's going to be a major inconvenience for the poor soul. Second, itching powder. The stuff works. Don't ask me how I know - it's a long story - but I know this stuff is going to make it a living hell for the duration of being in that costume. Unable to remove it, and the cartoon oversized head that I've ordered won't be so easy to remove to get to those itchy areas. Even if you get it off, where are you going to put it? It will take up an entire hallway if you lay it down, no one can get over that. Social media chaos won't stop me from exacting my revenge. Even if I need to play down to this childish level. If they want family friendly pranks and entertainment, they're going to get it ten fold.

Code:
Words: 150+

LordBallGag · 08-11-2023, 05:24 PM

ISFL affiliate
ISFL Affiliate +3

Andy · 08-11-2023, 05:59 PM

In order to get back on the mascot I start a campaign about unmasking the renegade. Due to our team being in Texas and cowboys have been popular throughout history in Texas. I think having an unmasking of the Renegade would be cool. I think it would be fun for it to culminate in either one the coach being part of the unmasking or a player. The plan would be a social media post of my equipment duct taped and say that the mascot has gone too far. It is time to reveal who the Renegade really is. This would then be followed by hints planned by the social media team. There would be hints also dropped at games as well as misdirection. The Renegade would come out with goalie gear one time and a suit another. The final game would then culminate in someone being the Renegade or having multiple people being the Renegade. This would then symbolize that everyone makes up the Renegades. Both players, coaches and fans

Z-Whiz · 08-11-2023, 06:56 PM

ISFL Affimasdwfilate: https://forums.sim-football.com/showthre...#pid722652

chefhuggles · 08-11-2023, 08:39 PM

Player Prompt: Morning Mayhem

Seeing as how the duct tape is kept in the medical closet of the Buffalo Stampede (for medical reasons), I know that coach will be in too much of a giggle fit to remember to lock the door. So, after I sneak into the medical closet, I'd grab myself some Nyquil. Maybe just a couple bottles of the REALLY drowsy stuff. I'm sure that what I assume is a buffalo costume must get, very, very hot, and the poor critter will need to rehydrate somehow, so maybe I put JUST enough Nyquil in their water! Just to make them a little sleepy. What people don't realize is that the costume is actually a female buffalo. A beautiful, single, female buffalo. Once our friend has gone down for a nap, I slap the buffalo outfit back on them, take them to the nearest local buffalo watering hole, and deposit them in the midst of the hot and bothered male buffalo looking for a spouse.

(163 words)

***Caleb*** · 08-12-2023, 12:20 AM

PT Pass

jj2416 · 08-12-2023, 12:29 AM

Written Task: The aliens have learned the game thanks to your tutelage, but have now been challenged to a playoff series by General-Khagan Kul'Garath of the Sarris Star Empire. Your team will, perhaps obviously, be at a size disadvantage, but you're very sure the Sarris players have never had a real coach and just watched the movie Goon several hundred times. How will you coach your plucky undersized extraterrestrial friends to victory?

The only way a coach could help us here is by using their size to their disadvantage. While they are on offense it will be a problem, but our offense should be able to beat them. If we can stay on offense a lot more we can hold them off to less points than we got. Having a game of of 11-10, but we will have to be the 11. What I can do is distribute to my friends as well as possible and get them to where they need to be with nods and motions if I have to. Using non verbal cues or marks that the opposition will not understand from a foreign area. Being able to have the chemistry advantage and being able to communicate better then them will be the only way that we an win it. Being stupidly aggressive and doing it with perfect teamwork is what we will have to do. Hopefully barely being able to pull it out in the end.
(169 words)

juniped · 08-12-2023, 12:45 AM

This is simple, it’s like they don’t even know who I am. They’ve seen Goon several hundred times? I am GOON. I live Goon I breathe Goon i am the Goon above all Goons. Sure size and strength help, but when you’re gooning around it’s also about precision and technique. If you hit the guys right, then you can be any size and knock them down. If you’re smaller than the other guy, you’re probably going to faster and harder to hit. As an expert goon I also know something they never will. I know what the true weaknesses of a goon are. I’ll be honest the weakness of a true goon is probably just pure skating and the basics. If I can teach them that then we are home free. Here’s the final nail in the coffin for my friends in the Sarris Star Empire. I can just teach my goalie to never give any goals, ever. Then we can never lose obviously.

*thiefofcheese* · 08-12-2023, 08:55 AM

So who said my aliens are small? Were their average sizes posted somewhere that I missed? But let us go ahead and assume that we will be at a size disadvantage as the PT claims. Hopefully with smaller size means we get greater speed and can simply dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge these large goons on the ice. Depending on how large the size difference is we may be able to skate between their legs (tentacles? arms?) and be quite zippy. Though it does worry me that they may have the full net blocked like that walrus from the commercial. Not 100% sure how we'd handle that. Or if they are "normal" and we are just "small" then how are we going to properly defend our net? Either way I think this may be a significant challenge that we will need to be able to overcome. And why exactly is hockey the intergalactic sport of choice? Seems like an odd choice to me, but I guess we just have to roll with it.

Raven · 08-12-2023, 09:32 AM

ISFL PT

Thank you Fever, sköldpaddor and OD for the amazing sigs!

Montreal Impact/Militia Militia-Old

|Player Page| Stars

|Update Page| Japan

Tesla · 08-12-2023, 12:46 PM

Affiliate PBE PT

***TheGreatToeJam*** · 08-12-2023, 12:52 PM

Player Prompt:

Egli likes to get to arena early. He's always the first guy in the room and he loves his routine. He has every game day mapped out the minute - he gets changed, has a stretch, rides the bike, has a snack, morning skate, nap, lunch, video review, afternoon skate, dinner, game time. You get the idea.

Imagine his pure rage and absolute ire when he opens up his bag after meeting with the video coach for his afternoon skate and all of his equipment is covered in ducts tape. Do you have any idea how long it took to peel all that shit off? After the skate Egli was still fuming, as he was taking his pads off the noticed his phone ping, the team feed tagged him in a post. Much to Egli's surprise it was that mangey fuck Eddy - the teams Arctic Fox mascot taping all his shit up. Yeah? Two can play that game.

After warm ups Egli attached a bit of fishing line to the stanchion and pulled it across the ice to the bench as he was skating off. He tied it right and headed back to the locker room where he intently watched the home feed. As Eddy took the ice to hype up the crowd and shoot some tee-shirts from a cannon into the crowd, he started skating full speed toward the home ice blue line - the fishing line caught Eddy right in the neck. A perfect clothes line. Eddy flipped head over heels, as he was rotating in the air the tee-shirt cannon went off, hitting a small disabled child whose make-a-wish was to watch the team warm up from the bench.

erikvm · 08-12-2023, 02:25 PM

After a few weeks of waiting and planning, making sure that the Steelhawk mascot’s guard is down, my plan comes to fruition. I will rig a tripwire trap hooked up to a paint can filled with blue paint hooked up right outside the mascot’s “office” but I am going to need to get a few members of the social media team to help me out. They need to trick the mascot into thinking they are filming some new segments for the team, and they are starting with a “day in the life” of the Hamilton Steelhawks mascot, and then when he begins the tour he will open the door, pulling the tripwire and then when the paint drops on him I will run from around the corner with a feather gun and blast him with it. All in the name of revenge, plus the social media team will have a field day with the beginning of a prank war between the mascot and one of the star players on the team.

***bluesfan55*** · 08-12-2023, 03:07 PM

pp

sebastien regazzoni is always early to practice, and he prefers to keep his stuff at the rink because he is lazy when it comes to his gear. so you could imagine his surprise when he arrived at the rink one day to find out that his rink was all duct taped by the steelhawks' beloved mascot steely the steelbird. so sebastien got to scheming. he wanted to get back at the team's lazy ass mascot which did nothing besides shoot a stupid t-shirt cannon. so he decided to do a 2-prong prank. the first was to put fondue in the mascot's uniform. it's not warm fondue either. it's just fondue. he let it sit in the costume as long as he could to make it all smelly and disgusting. but that's not all. he also replaced the mascot's t-shirt cannon with a water gun, which he filled with pedialyte (which no one likes). take that steely you lame fuck

ty to @High Stick King @EvilAllBran and @Ragnar for the sigs

KlusteR · 08-12-2023, 03:33 PM

Code:
Player Prompt: Morning Mayhem

Written Task: You enter your stall one morning before an early practice and find your gear all wrapped in unholy amounts of duct tape. Nothing was actually damaged, and your coach doesn't acknowledge your lateness in getting on the ice, beyond trying not to smile. A brief investigation of your team's Xitter feed reveals the mascot as the culprit.

How do you get back at your mascot? Remember, this is a prank duel to drive social media engagement! Don't hurt your mascot or permanently prevent them from doing their job!

It is an unfortunately widespread fact that Cokey the Bear, the Grizzlies' mascot, does like to indulge himself with pranking the players left and right, but Levin thought he would be able to escape those shenanigans now that he's been selected as the team's captain... Alas! Cokey was very thorough, as well - not even his cell phone escaped the torment of being wrapped in duct tape.

To get back at him, Levin decided to have a little fun. He went to the local grocery store and purchased a bottle of a hot sauce that is graded in the 5 million on the Scoville scale, and then passed by a prank shop, and purchased some itching powder. He mixed the two - very carefully, and while wearing a mask and goggle... safety first - and then packed up the concoction for his next trip to the arena. He then waited for a moment where Cokey was out of his mascot outfit, and lathered the inside of the costume (not the head, Levin's not a complete psychopath) with the incredibly villainous mixture. Within minutes of the next home game, Cokey was surrounded by giggling kids, all the while the mascot's actor was screeching in horror, as every part of his body was itching, but should he scratch, the searing pain of the hot sauce would take over him.

Levin's hockey equipment was left as is from this day forward.

(240 words)

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