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***KaleSalad*** · 06-17-2024, 11:47 AM

*Zerg* · 06-17-2024, 12:02 PM

Option 1: Grzegorz has been turned into a superhuman demigod, the Hercules of hockey. He's still a goalie. So, how to make this interesting for the fans? Simply sitting in the crease and playing good technically sound goalie, while never really leaving the crease or playing the puck, works wonders when you're a regular ball-shaped embodiment of a country that physically doesn't have a five-hole, but if you do that as an enhanced reincarnation of Rostam you're just getting shutouts every game without really trying. That's sure to bore the fans. So, instead of just being the perfect goalie going undefeated every single year, Grzegorz will set a new challenge for himself: every time he gets control of the puck, he is required to skate with it into the neutral zone and take a shot on goal. He still can't cross the red line, because he's still a goalie, but he has to skate up and shoot the puck. With 9001 TPE he'll probably even score a few times. Now that's gonna be fun to watch. Maybe if we got a better sim engine...

Nictox · 06-17-2024, 12:22 PM

Option 2:

Really the only thing you can do if you are outmatched is not give up. Never let the opponent know you are tired and keep pushing to make the play happen. Worse case, you did your best and almost stopped a chance. Best case, you pull off some heroic stuff and are looked at in a positive light. With that said, I consider myself highly skilled offensively, but lacking in the defense department. Though, physically, I am willing and able to play the body if needed. It is still important to really hammer home the point though, never give up. The need to compete should be a huge driving force in all players. I feel like I do a very good job with this. I am always ready to play, and I will play my ass off to try to get the win. As athletes, we must understand that the team is bigger than the players, and I mean that in sense that fans consider the team theirs. Never give up, keep going for the fans.

[176]

RIP Dangel #AD26 | RIP TDZ

Fluw · 06-17-2024, 12:43 PM

PT pass

Bayley · 06-17-2024, 12:48 PM

TPE, what the heck is TPE when you are going to be a Super Hero? Or, are you saying that TPE matters if you are going to be a goalie? Well, that gives me good ideas. I am going to be a super human goalie in which TPE actually matters. I will have the smallest pads ever, but I will be the fastest and quickest reaction goalie that this league has ever seen. I mean, if I can be fast, cut down angles, and also stop every single shot that comes my way, what else do you even need? The program teaches me all of those things. Think of Space Jam where I just drink the water and become crazy good, well that is what will happen. I will be allowed to really just do the mpt and then some other predictions and be the best goalie ever. So, minimum work, but be the best goalie. It teaches me to be lazy, but also good. Who doesn't want that?

Rabidsponge21 · 06-17-2024, 01:00 PM

Mikkel's procedure was a pretty straight forward one. The key to un tapped strength follows the simplest of regimes imaginable to give ones self the undeniable power to concur ones foes. Become the hero you want to be.

100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, 100 squats, and a 10K run - plus eating 2 full banana everyday. Why 2 Bananas? This is something that very few people know to continue this secret enhancement program. MONKEY NEVER CRAMP. How is it that they look like they do? And have strength greater than most humans? The answer has been right there all along. With this method alone Mikkel is hoping to produce a hall of fame career and lead Montreal back to the promised land of the SHL finals with many of those trips ending in their favour. That and the super strength formula which was injected into him - but who cares about those semantics when the real work is done OUT THERE. Out where? THERE. Duh.

Tate · 06-17-2024, 01:06 PM

***bluesfan55*** · 06-17-2024, 01:24 PM

option 1

sebastien regazzoni, through becoming a super hockey player, has become "Captain Switzerland". this involved regazzoni getting roided up to give him 20 strength and 20 shooting power. regazzoni had always seen himself as a very fast skater, and the scientists decided to put little mini rockets in regazzoni's legs that activated every time he accelerated his skating, giving him 20 acceleration and 20 speed. regazzoni was also given the best vision possible, which means 20 passing, 20 getting open, and 20 anticipation. all of this tpe boosting meant that regazzoni came in at a staggering 3000 tpe. yes, that's right. he would become the greatest player ever in the history of the shl when it comes to total tpe. regazzoni might be a shl veteran, but with this tpe boost and major skill increase, regazzoni would become an absolute stallion and arguably the best player in the history of the league. crazy work.

ty to @High Stick King @EvilAllBran and @Ragnar for the sigs

CaptainCamel · 06-17-2024, 01:48 PM

Option 1:

One night while walking home late at night after a hard practice, Paul Bondage is jumped out of nowhere and bitten by a radioactive Wayne Gretzky. Oh no! Should he go to the hospital? Call the cops? No, these things happen, just shake it up and continue getting pucks deep. He has cold sweats all night, horrendous nightmares of old boomers playing hockey and giving their political opinions. But when he wakes up and heads to practice the next morning, he is seeing the matrix on the ice. It seems that if there were a magical stats system which he could quantify his skills, his Defensive Read and Offensive Read have gone absolutely off the scales. He might not have the most accurate shot, he might not throw the biggest hits, but he is absolutely reading every single play that is happening between every single player on the ice. He is now always in the exact right spot at the exact right time.

WC: 163

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