Halifax Gazette -

Super agent Michael Scarn packed his bags and made the move to Halifax yesterday night, only hours before the SMJHL trade deadline. The former Dunder Mifflin regional manager leaves the Denver, Colorado branch with high hopes and dreams. While he was collecting his belongings in a small cardboard box crate, the manager stated, "May your hats fly as high as your dreams!" Although no one in the Colorado office threw their caps into the air, for after all they were not at a college graduation, Michael Scarn said this proudly and noted that it would've been really awesome if it was a graduation.

On the move to Halifax, Michael Scarn reflected on his time in Colorado. When he moved with his fiancee Holly to Colorado, he left the Scranton branch in the good hands of DeAngelo Vickers. However, Vickers' tenure in Scranton was cut short after only days when he was tragically involved in a basketball injury. Michael Scarn then took to managing the Scranton branch remotely, calling in everyday to help out the team. While in Colorado, Michael Scarn took up a second job in a call center, selling Lipephedrine pills to others. Michael Scarn was a star in the Raptors Call Center, all of his teammates were great salesmen and they enjoyed listening to Scarn talking about his most recent biopic he was working on, Threat Level Midnight. Most notably, Knute Knurtsson, Nick Brain, Parker Smeb, and Cassius Darrow were his favorites at the call center. Michael Scarn truly felt at home in Colorado while working his two jobs. He truly lived the American dream of having two jobs. Scarn said, "I tried to live the dream. I tried to have a job, a girlfriend, another job, and I succeeded. And the good thing about the American dream is that you can go to sleep and do it all again the next night."

Although Scarn was very satisfied with his life in Colorado, he felt the urge and need to continue to improve himself. The Raptors Call Center was fine and all but Scarn had ambitions of true glory. And taking up a third job simply wasn't an option. And so Michael Scarn thought long and hard about what he had to do. Scarn wrote down all of the names of the possible companies he could work for on a note pad. 



Scarn truly felt lost at this stage of his life. He knew he couldn't work at Prince Paper after being a shark and making that beautiful little small family business go out of business by taking all their clients and their leads. So Scarn kept thinking. Suddenly, it hit him. After Holly Flax was sent away to Nashua, New Hampshire by Dunder Mifflin CFO David Wallace, Michael Scarn went on a business trip to Winnipeg, Canada. There, Michael Scarn got in touch with the Winnipeg Jets who promised to draft him in the SHL draft upon his entry to the league. Scarn really enjoyed his trip to Canada. He even brought plenty of maple syrup to give to his Winnipeg business associates to show them respect, as is the Canadian custom. Scarn felt ingrained into the Canadian culture. Everyone in Canada was so nice to him. So Scarn turned his eyes to Canada.

Scarn liked Canada a lot but he wasn't sure what part of Canada he preferred. The Vancouver Whalers, the Kelowna Knights, the Lethbridge Lions, the Halifax Raiders, and the Montreal Militia were all located in Canada. In fact, Scarn didn't realize it but he was spending the majority of his time in Canada playing away games. Scarn loved playing in Canada and had some experience playing in different cities. But he could not decide which city he liked best. So he put it up to the fate of others to inquire about his availability. Michael Scarn would let the others come to him.

The Halifax Raiders were the first team to approach Michael Scarn. Not only as the first team to inquire about trading for him, but also the first team to contact him prior to the SMJHL S45 Draft. Michael Scarn enjoyed talking to @King and really envisioned himself wearing a Halifax Raiders uniform shortly. However, his name wasn't called on draft night by the Halifax management and instead he moved on to Colorado with Holly. Now, the Halifax Raiders were back interested in Scarn and making sure he landed in their colors this time around. The Halifax Raiders have made several bold and forthright decisions this trade deadline. They acquired the 1st overall pick of the SHL S46 Draft in Nikolai Evans. And now they have added the #1 TPE S46 prospect in Agent Michael Scarn. Scarn looks forward to the fight in the playoffs and joining his Halifax brothers on the ice.