I am not sure if JPB would give this answer but I like to think he would be an Arctic Fox or something. Im like 98% sure I say that because of that one scene in the Magicians (TV Show), so let me look over their wiki article.

Quote:In the wild, most individuals do not live past their first year but some exceptional ones survive up to 11 years.[9] Its body length ranges from 46 to 68 cm (18 to 27 in), with a generally rounded body shape to minimize the escape of body heat.

The Arctic fox preys on many small creatures such as lemmings, voles, ringed seal pups, fish, waterfowl, and seabirds. It also eats carrion, berries, seaweed, and insects and other small invertebrates. Arctic foxes form monogamous pairs during the breeding season and they stay together to raise their young in complex underground dens. Occasionally, other family members may assist in raising their young. Natural predators of the Arctic fox are golden eagles,[10] polar bears,[11] wolverines, red foxes, wolves, and grizzly bears.[12][13]

Yea that feels like JPB. I mean let's be honest, new players on this site are lucky to live past a year, and JPB is currently monogamous. He also has very intricate designs for his new home that's currently being built. Actual architects are confused by it because all of JPB's plans are done in crayon and say things like "Bitchin Jacuzzi here." Now it doesn't mention that Artic Foxes eat Poutine, but thats ok. JPB will get over that.