I explained it in my first SMJHL Media briefly, but here goes:

I'm originally from the Northeast, where Long Johns are just a type of thermal underwear. In the midwest, "Long Johns" are underwear too, but they're also a kind of donut. It's pretty much an eclair without any filling. Stupid as fuck.

So one time I'm with my buddies just chillin and my one friend goes "Went to the gas station, grabbed two long johns and a water" and I'm like "Uh, what? You buy underwear at the gas station?"

Then this long conversation ensues about what the fuck a Long John is.

So the name's sort of a double entendre and a puzzle. "Long" John Donair is tall, so he's long. But his teammates called him "Donut" because a Long John is a donut but Donair also sounds like a donut. However, as most Canadians know, a Donair is savory and not sweet. I want to make Donair to be a problem to the opposing offense while still screening people and putting up goals. I always name my player with a pun, but with a player build in mind.

"Buzz" Killington - killed the buzz of many speedy forwards with checks, and disrupted the flow of play with goals
"Bananas" Foster - fucking crazy lol
Jerry "The Snake" Mander - jerrymandering, not choosing a side of the ice to operate on but serviceable everywhere (esp after the switch to defender)
"Negative" Ned Sommers - i knew he'd have a negative +/- as a DFD in GOMHL, but he still plugged along, and he's my only sim league HOF player to date.
Richard "The Transporter" Shaw - assists-first forward, rickshaw like the little cart
Farley "Sweetness" Sathers - supposed to be a smooth, sweet point guard in SBA but I never got into it really -- Farley-Sathers is a brand of penny candy
Frederick "Iron" Ferrous - the iron man heavyweight of the simFC

So yeah, I'll get more into this on my Buzzkill post, but figured you'd like the explanation here.