This is incredibly tricky--Darrow's at the top of his game still, and is a consummate competitor. He would likely try to kill me if I sold off part of his talents for something else. Alas, I shall do it anyway.

I would trade 250 TPE to redeem a serving of the best french fries from every US state. That's 50 things of fries, one for every 5 TPE. I can redeem them at any time, and get them hot and fresh as intended. A life's goal of mine is to try the best french fry in the world, and this would be a decent next step.