An unexpected surprise that happened this past season to Sekai Wollker of the Anaheim Outlaws was discovering the true meaning of Christmas. Apparently it's not about the toys and gifts and delicious food presented lovingly on a table set up to feed a small kingdom of people who look like you or are near and dear to your heart, and some trucker named Bruce who your sister found at the truck stop on her way to your house... but it's about the birth of Santa Clause. We must respect and honour the birth of this great jolly benevolent man because if he ever decides to get pissed off at us, he's got an entire legion of super-trained elves who never sleep and always know what you're up to through his highly advanced superstructured spy network that can see all and know all. Also it's rumoured that elves may have already feasted upon human flesh, though not proven. Just suspected because no ones seen Charlie in a few days don't you know.

Also Sekai Wollker needs to stop talking to homeless crazy people at the beach.