S63 mPT #3: CUZ BABY TONIGHT 3
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Thunfish
Registered Posting Freak
I suppose the one that hits me truly the most has to be Jeremy by Pearl Jam.
Clearly I remember Pickin' on the boy Seemed a harmless little fuck But we unleashed the lion Gnashed his teeth and bit the recess lady's breast How could I forget And he hit me with a surprise left My jaw left hurting Dropped wide open Just like the day Oh, like the day I heard Daddy didn't give affection, no And the boy was something that mommy wouldn't wear King Jeremy the wicked Oh ruled his world I was bullied as a little kid for about three years or so. See, when I was the age of reaching primary school, I actually liked going to classes very much, had loads of enthusiasm and happened to be hopeful for the future. The kids in my class really didn't share this outlook, treated me like utter garbage and frequently tried to isolate me. Hell, it got so bad that I didn't even want to go to class. I never had the strength to tell to my father that I felt oppressed and powerless, mostly because the school was expensive but it promised the world once it was all over. Until one day came, the day I got in a fight. First time I ever did resort to violence, too. It felt good, it felt... nice. Like I was able to fight for justice. Obviously, things got worse from there on and I only "recently" managed to get a hold on the concept of trusting people. The school, also rather obviously and unfortunately, chose to back up the rich pricks while I got the flack, while also giving them plenty of excuses to isolate me. I still can kinda tell when people decide to be nice for "reasons", whether to feel better about themselves or not. Still fucking disgusts me - if you want to be friends with folks, show that you give a shit and not just spell sweet nothings on their ears, it's not fucking rocket science. I got a better outlook in life again, eventually, after years and years of growing up, but it still comes in some nights, when the day was just too bad or I got ignored too much. I know I'm rather unique as a person in many ways - tastes, thoughts, opinions, stories, humour, all that - so I guess I'm fine about not being constantly talked to, I might interrupt thoughts, that's not nice and all that but... people still require some interaction in life, y'know. I mean, if I didn't want it, I could've probably just closed myself off from the world, the exception being the useful friend here or there. Nobody would've batted an eye. Nobody ever did back then, doubt it'd be much different these days. I did, however, consider offing myself once like the boy whose story apparently served as the basis for the song but religion and (more important) my father made me not go ahead with it. My parents had me pretty young so they were very inexperienced, but when it came to be, they really helped me out. Last year of primary, they went to the school and, finally, the school did something about it. But by then, I just ignored everyone and went ahead with my days. The place ended up closing, the people who ran it were fucking horrible with money and I've only seen a couple of folks from primary school once or twice after that. I did scare one away on a holiday, though, that was fun. Almost got to punch the fat shit in the face too. Player Page - Update Page Former Players: Yoshimitsu McCloud (LW, #64) - Won a Four Star Cup once, knew ninjutsu, picture editors hated him, never tried free agency Anton Harrier (LW, #90) - Won WJC gold, liked skateboarding a lot, went to the finals with Manhattan, kept his seat glued in LR |
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