1. +3 tpe

This is an easy one. I’d be on the Detroit falcons. Why? A few reasons. One, they won. They are the champions, so if I was on the falcons i would be a champion too. Two, I am a homer. Love the falcons. Always a falcon. No ring for me personally this season, but being in the locker room for so many years I get to live vicariously through the current team. Three, they won. Did I say that? I am a goalie, and there is no room for goalies in Detroit so I guess i would be up in the press box, eating hot dogs or whatever. So I do not think I would have much of an effect on the outcome of the series. Really have my fingers crossed right that neither goalie gets injured. More of a coat tail kind of ride. Not a full participation kind of thing. But who knows.

3. +2 tpe

Make your way down to Prospera Place in downtown Kelowna this Thursday night. Where your Kelowna Knights will take on rivals the Vancouver Whalers. All children and the first one thousand adults will receive a “we aren’t as shitty as you!” T shirt and commemorative cup. What’s that? What did you say? The first TWO THOUSAND adults will receive the “we aren’t as shitty as you!” Memorabilia?! What?! And a free hotdog? What?! We’ll make sure to get your hands on this once in a lifetime deal! And maybe, if we are lucky, the knights will win!
GO KNIGHTS GO
GO KNIGHTS GO
GO KNIGHTS GO

5. +3 tpe

So kelowna is not a very big place. So some of the charities we have the opportunity to work with are some times very niche. One time I was asked to appear at a save the squirrels rally at waterfront park. Something about teens and adolescents shooting paint balls or air soft guns at squirrels in parks around the city. A few weeks ago they closed some of downtown to run a benefit for one of the local brewery owners, who claims, not me him, that squatch took their dog. Whatever. I get free beer. Keep an eye out kelowna! The next dog may be yours! Last night we had a bowl a thon with the elks club womens auxiliary. Those ladies can drink. Holy shit. I am still drunk I think. I was doing shots off old ladies, it was crazy. They tried to get some of us back to their club house for an after party. But it was already too much. And Edna keeps blowing up my phone.

12. +3 tpe

Casey Fantobens - Goalie - Kelowna Knights
She is a top tier prospect with the pedigree and attitude to make it in the Simulation Hockey League.
Fantastic positioning. Always a square to the puck. Any time the opposition has a high quality shot they are looking at the knights logo on her sweater.
Unparalleled lateral movement for a goalie her size at eighteen years old. Post to post in the blink of an eye.
Closes up the five hole quickly. Able to get to the ice extremely quick on low shots.
Short only 5’6” doesn’t take up much of the net, but positioning and reflexes make up for it.
Above average glove and blocker. Had an easy time with high shots but was definitely less successful.
Extreme mental fortitude. Facing a rediculous amount of shots behind a rebuilding defense made game more difficult they they should have been.
In summation, top tier talent. High end potential. High ceiling. Very high floor.

13. +2 tpe

A. Best name hands down Bnana NWaffles. They way it disrespects the banana while lifting up the waffle is a thing to behold. I don’t know. Hodor is pretty cool. Hodor. I’m sure you are going to get a lot of bubba trees and bnana. I’m sorry. What do you think the rest of his family are called? Buebrry? Cocolatecip?

C. My key player is Sam azjha for the Detroit falcons. No team will be successful without secondary scoring. And he scored so much Detroit had two first lines. Along with seider and patey on the back end. It’s are to nail down one thing. They were a train that chugged through the whole season. Almost got derailed right at the end but dared to stay on track.

16. +3 tpe

S65 milestones