There are certain cultural norms and taboos that surround the locker room in practically any team sport that, unless authority figures work to stamp out, will swirl in like the mist and settle: veterans get first choice of lockers and seats if changes come about; rookies and youngsters do the menial work; nobody touches the stereo without expressed permission from the captain, and so on, so forth.

Many of these cultural traditions are, unfortunately, North American in origin. And Finland is not North American.

So it came to be that when the doors to the Detroit Falcons complex were formally opened at seven a.m, the early birds of the team walked into the locker room to find a severely jet-lagged Simo Jaaskelainen snarling along to what he'd later explain was famed Finnish death metallers Children of Bodom, having parked his bags squarely in Wayne Holloway's spot. Second impressions are just as important as the first, right?

Right?