Rules are rules?

First order of business in my reign as Head of the Rules Committee: All players are now required to wear skates on their hands and only wear a maximum of two skates. What does this mean for the future of hockey? Well, it means kids are going to have to start learning how to hold handstands and walk/skate with their hands and arms. Perhaps they will learn to hold a stick with their feet. Will it be bare feet? Will there be gloves made for feet? Will players opt to try and use their upper legs? It's completely open for discovery. General managers will now conduct tests on which prospects skate the best on their hands. And, for the short term, that may be the only thing that matters. Merely getting around will be the advantage while the old heads of the leagues will be incapacitated. Even if they don't accurately swing the stick with their feet, they're bound to get lucky sooner or later.