S74 PT#1: Poindexter Painpoints
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MikeLiut
SMJHL GM Posting Freak
Option 1
Blog of BAPHockeyStatsGod69 <Background looks like a Geocities page from the 90s, it is written in comic sans. A midi file starts, “We Will Rock You”, by Queens> WHY I LOVE EKATERINA VALIEVA SO MUCH <with a series of 17 heart emojis> Valieva is known to be one of the best defense-oriented centers in the world <world emoji>. She’s flanked by two other hockey legends, the well-established Adam Liebold, and the new rookie, his brother Thomas. <7 heart emojis> Many know that line as the Liebold sandwich <12 sandwich emojis>. The Liebold sandwich has the fewest goal scored against in the second period, on Wednesdays. Ekaterina, a playoff specialist, is also the player who won the more faceoffs against players whose family name ends with a vowel. Ekaterina does not have the best traditional advanced stats as those are more focused on offense than defense, but she is leading the team in Goalie Zone Protection Rate (GZPR) – my own creation. My own stat (and I can sell my formula to any SHL team for 1 million <too many cash emojis to count>) calculates the number of players hit in the face in post-goal celebrations after a goal against. We all know Ekaterina does not like to be scored against, and she is leading in broken noses this season, with three so far. And check my other blog: Why the Inferno SUCKKKKKKKS. 231 words. |
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