Written Option 2:

So you're telling me that we live in a day and age where the SHL actively WANTS us to take performance enhancing drugs? Well, in the words of professional wrestler and even more professional racist dirtbag Hulk Hogan, "That doesn't work for me, brother". There is only one drug that Trevor Lopez is willing to put in his body, and that's the edibles that he pops after a long, physicially exhausting and painful Vancouver win. Perhaps he doesn't have the fanciest style of play, or isn't yet playing at a level that has the fans roaring and on the edge of their seats, but he's an honorable man who's true to himself no matter what. He'll tell the director of this Player Enhancement Program to shove it up their blowhole, and play the only method he knows how to play: the Trevor Lopez way.

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