During one of the last games of the season, Grzegorz Brzeczyszczykiewicz achieves something truly remarkable, and something that leaves him somewhat conflicted. Goalies scoring goals goes against nature, let alone the entire shebang that went down this game.

In the first period, for the first goal of the game, Grzegorz did something he almost never does: pass the puck. He typically just buries the puck as soon as he makes contact with it, then lets his team worry about establishing control on the faceoff. It's simple, clean, and lets his team know what to expect. This time, some defenseman on the Pride chose to try to ice the puck by sending it right at Grzegorz from deep in his own zone. After all, if Grzegorz covers the puck there, it's a faceoff in HIS end. Having both the game sense to recognize this and the professional pride to take offense, Grzegorz did not cover the puck as usual. Instead, he rifled it to Derek Martin, who deeked a defender and buried it. Grzegorz Brzeczyszczykiewicz had recorded his first career assist.

At the end of the second period, a line brawl erupted. Grzegorz and Justin, seeing their respective chances, snuck to center ice while the officials were distracted and dropped their gloves. The likes of the goalie fight that ensued have never been seen in the league before, and will never be seen again until we get a real sim engine. Grzegorz kicked Justin's ass, obviously. When has the reverse ever happened? That's what I thought.

To wrap up the night, as the third period ticked down and the Panthers lead 1-0, the Pride pulled their goalie. Grzegorz got the puck on his stick, and fired it into the air. He was actually aiming for the backboards; aiming for the net never occurred to him as something he had the option of doing. However, a Pride skater got their stick on the puck, just enough to deflect it, and watch it roll on its side down the ice and into his goal. Because own-goals don't exist in hockey, Grzegorz Brzeczyszczykiewicz had just scored a goalie goal, and in the process had completed a goalie Gordie Howe hat trick.

(374 words)