galatix Registered
Respected Galactic Princess
ZINAIDA TITOVA: PREGGERS????
Tramp hockey player pregnant, father unknown
Deadspin has an exclusive story to bring to you and it turns out that the Russian mobster queen is expecting! A photo revealed her pregnancy and revealed to us why her rookie year was such a bust. How does a mighty SMJHL captain fall so far? Why was there an entire thing on retiring and unretiring? We have those answers for you!
Deadspin has reached out to see what this almost teenage mother is doing and how she could be that irresponsible. There was nothing at first other than some curses in Russian that made everyone who understood blush. Eventually, after being rudely hung up on, Titova's agent called us back and we were given a press release about the situation. It reads as follows:
Zina's pregnancy is nobody's business but her own at this time. She has been in full contact with the Riot management during this time and has been focused on what is best for her and her future children. She is not naming a father at this time because she has yet to put a ring on him and is still convincing him otherwise. She would like to remind everyone that no, it is not Slava Orlov. There is no way in hell and she'd appreciate it if you would all kindly go away.
Anyone who does not obey this are subject to lawsuits and damages since this has been a medically difficult pregnancy and she is not screwing around.
Of course, we at Deadspin feel like insistence on it not being Orlov's will point him as the obvious choice. Good luck to the expecting parents and we wish everyone at home luck in your gambling pools for who this mystery father is.
...Wait, did she say children?
Maxim Poulin || D || Winnipeg Jets || Kelowna Knights
Age: 19
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 205 lbs
Number: 52
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
S38 GP 50, G 6, A 15, +8, PIM 32, HIT 52, SB 27
S39
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Statistics:
S37 GP 6, A 1, -2, PIM 2, HIT 4, SB 4
S38 GP 6, G 2, +1, PIM 0, HIT 5, SB 11
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions/Achievements
S37 Free Agent Signed to Mammoths
S38 8th Overall to the Kelowna Knights
S38 Gold Medal Winner as a Rookie - Russia
S39 23rd Overall to the Winnipeg Jets
S40 Win Four Star Cup
S41 Win Four Star Cup
S42 Called up to Winnipeg Jets
l
Zinaida "Zina" Titova || ex-SFP Co || LW
Age: 20
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 150 lbs
Number: 16
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL
S34 Made Captain of the Mammoths
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
S31 Signed with Montreal Militia
S32 Drafted 10th to Colorado Mammoths
S33 Drafted 17th to Seattle Riot
S35 Traded to Portland
S36 MIA with Mob, Retired
Jersey retired with Mammoths S38
crutch Registered
i was wrong about sea of thieves 2018
Gambling odds:
mpc: 2/1
Viatcheslav Orlov: 4/1
Sylvester Stallone: 8/1
Zach Evans: 10/1
Cameron Urbowitz: 25/1
Patrick Brumm: 50/1
Chris Crutchfield: 100/1
RiFF RAFF: 250/1
CARTER CRUTCHFIELD || RD || ARMADA || 242 TPE
NAME: Carter Crutchfield
BIRTHPLACE: Los Angeles, California
HEIGHT: 6'1"
WEIGHT: 195 lbs
NUMBER: 2
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S65 ANC : GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S65 STL: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
TRANSACTIONS
S65 - SMJHL - Drafted Pick 34, Round 3 by the Anchorage Armada
------------------------------------------------------------
CONTRACTS
S65 - ANC: $3,000,000
------------------------------------------------------------
AWARDS / TROPHY CASE
------------------------------------------------------------
MWHazard Registered
S37 Challenge Cup Champion
Quote: Originally posted by CRUTCHFIELD @Jul 25 2017, 12:21 PM
Gambling odds:
mpc: 2/1
Viatcheslav Orlov: 4/1
Sylvester Stallone: 8/1
Zach Evans: 10/1
Cameron Urbowitz: 25/1
Patrick Brumm: 50/1
Chris Crutchfield: 100/1
RiFF RAFF: 250/1
*shoves money forward*
PUT IT ALL ON RiFF RAFF
#GOJETSGO
S32 SHL Draft No. 1 Overall
Max Weber || D#39 || Portland Admirals/Winnipeg Jets ||
crutch Registered
i was wrong about sea of thieves 2018
Quote: Originally posted by MWHazard @Jul 25 2017, 01:23 PM
*shoves money forward*
PUT IT ALL ON RiFF RAFF
It's a solid bet imo
Never rule him out
CARTER CRUTCHFIELD || RD || ARMADA || 242 TPE
NAME: Carter Crutchfield
BIRTHPLACE: Los Angeles, California
HEIGHT: 6'1"
WEIGHT: 195 lbs
NUMBER: 2
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S65 ANC : GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S65 STL: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
TRANSACTIONS
S65 - SMJHL - Drafted Pick 34, Round 3 by the Anchorage Armada
------------------------------------------------------------
CONTRACTS
S65 - ANC: $3,000,000
------------------------------------------------------------
AWARDS / TROPHY CASE
------------------------------------------------------------
Quote: Originally posted by CRUTCHFIELD @Jul 25 2017, 12:26 PM
It's a solid bet imo
Never rule him out
I would like to do a 3 leg parlay of Brumm, Crutchfield, and Riff Raff
galatix Registered
Respected Galactic Princess
To clarify: Zina will be good to go for the next season because the twins will be born by then and offseason takes forever.
Maxim Poulin || D || Winnipeg Jets || Kelowna Knights
Age: 19
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 205 lbs
Number: 52
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
S38 GP 50, G 6, A 15, +8, PIM 32, HIT 52, SB 27
S39
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Statistics:
S37 GP 6, A 1, -2, PIM 2, HIT 4, SB 4
S38 GP 6, G 2, +1, PIM 0, HIT 5, SB 11
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions/Achievements
S37 Free Agent Signed to Mammoths
S38 8th Overall to the Kelowna Knights
S38 Gold Medal Winner as a Rookie - Russia
S39 23rd Overall to the Winnipeg Jets
S40 Win Four Star Cup
S41 Win Four Star Cup
S42 Called up to Winnipeg Jets
l
Zinaida "Zina" Titova || ex-SFP Co || LW
Age: 20
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 150 lbs
Number: 16
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL
S34 Made Captain of the Mammoths
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
S31 Signed with Montreal Militia
S32 Drafted 10th to Colorado Mammoths
S33 Drafted 17th to Seattle Riot
S35 Traded to Portland
S36 MIA with Mob, Retired
Jersey retired with Mammoths S38
crutch Registered
i was wrong about sea of thieves 2018
I'm putting my entire life savings on mpc at 2/1
Let's get that $$$$
CARTER CRUTCHFIELD || RD || ARMADA || 242 TPE
NAME: Carter Crutchfield
BIRTHPLACE: Los Angeles, California
HEIGHT: 6'1"
WEIGHT: 195 lbs
NUMBER: 2
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S65 ANC : GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S65 STL: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
TRANSACTIONS
S65 - SMJHL - Drafted Pick 34, Round 3 by the Anchorage Armada
------------------------------------------------------------
CONTRACTS
S65 - ANC: $3,000,000
------------------------------------------------------------
AWARDS / TROPHY CASE
------------------------------------------------------------
galatix Registered
Respected Galactic Princess
Quote: Originally posted by CRUTCHFIELD @Jul 25 2017, 03:32 PM
I'm putting my entire life savings on mpc at 2/1
Let's get that $$$$
Don't you read
Maxim Poulin || D || Winnipeg Jets || Kelowna Knights
Age: 19
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 205 lbs
Number: 52
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
S38 GP 50, G 6, A 15, +8, PIM 32, HIT 52, SB 27
S39
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Statistics:
S37 GP 6, A 1, -2, PIM 2, HIT 4, SB 4
S38 GP 6, G 2, +1, PIM 0, HIT 5, SB 11
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions/Achievements
S37 Free Agent Signed to Mammoths
S38 8th Overall to the Kelowna Knights
S38 Gold Medal Winner as a Rookie - Russia
S39 23rd Overall to the Winnipeg Jets
S40 Win Four Star Cup
S41 Win Four Star Cup
S42 Called up to Winnipeg Jets
l
Zinaida "Zina" Titova || ex-SFP Co || LW
Age: 20
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 150 lbs
Number: 16
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL
S34 Made Captain of the Mammoths
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
S31 Signed with Montreal Militia
S32 Drafted 10th to Colorado Mammoths
S33 Drafted 17th to Seattle Riot
S35 Traded to Portland
S36 MIA with Mob, Retired
Jersey retired with Mammoths S38
fgh Registered
Somehow was a GM
Posts: 10,158
Threads: 420
Joined: Aug 2014
Reputation:
0
Pronouns: Undisclosed
Quote: Originally posted by galatix @Jul 25 2017, 03:30 PM
To clarify: Zina will be good to go for the next season because the twins will be born by then and offseason takes forever.
The math checks out:
Announces at the end of the playoffs (mid-May)
Probably announces at the 5 week - 2 month mark
Offseason lasts an eternity
Kids are born ready to start S42
Geronimo Otto || C || SFP || GER || S31-S43
Drafted 49th by Kelowna Knights
Drafted 20th by Portland Admirals
Co-GM of POR/SFP S35, S41-S50
Traded to Edmonton Blizzard S43
Ray Bork || D || HAM || GBR || S44-S58
Drafted 7th by Halifax Raiders
Auto-Drafted 2nd Round (Co-GM) by SFP
Traded to Hamilton Steelhawks S55
Gonzo Gobbledygook || W || COL || NOR || S60-Present
Drafted 7th by Colorado Raptors
Drafted 4th by Winnipeg Aurora
crutch Registered
i was wrong about sea of thieves 2018
Quote: Originally posted by galatix @Jul 25 2017, 01:37 PM
Don't you read
Yea but I'm a sucker for a good odds on favorite
CARTER CRUTCHFIELD || RD || ARMADA || 242 TPE
NAME: Carter Crutchfield
BIRTHPLACE: Los Angeles, California
HEIGHT: 6'1"
WEIGHT: 195 lbs
NUMBER: 2
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S65 ANC : GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S65 STL: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
TRANSACTIONS
S65 - SMJHL - Drafted Pick 34, Round 3 by the Anchorage Armada
------------------------------------------------------------
CONTRACTS
S65 - ANC: $3,000,000
------------------------------------------------------------
AWARDS / TROPHY CASE
------------------------------------------------------------
crutch Registered
i was wrong about sea of thieves 2018
Quote: Originally posted by mpc @Jul 25 2017, 01:37 PM
The math checks out:
Announces at the end of the playoffs (mid-May)
Probably announces at the 5 week - 2 month mark
Offseason lasts an eternity
Kids are born ready to start S42
It's weird u know so much about the pregnancy and you aren't the father allegedly I don't buy it
Everyone slam money on c
CARTER CRUTCHFIELD || RD || ARMADA || 242 TPE
NAME: Carter Crutchfield
BIRTHPLACE: Los Angeles, California
HEIGHT: 6'1"
WEIGHT: 195 lbs
NUMBER: 2
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL CAREER STATS
S65 ANC : GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL PLAYOFF STATS
S65 STL: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL CAREER STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL PLAYOFF STATS
S6X ???: GP: , G: , A: , P: , +/-:
------------------------------------------------------------
TRANSACTIONS
S65 - SMJHL - Drafted Pick 34, Round 3 by the Anchorage Armada
------------------------------------------------------------
CONTRACTS
S65 - ANC: $3,000,000
------------------------------------------------------------
AWARDS / TROPHY CASE
------------------------------------------------------------
galatix Registered
Respected Galactic Princess
Quote: Originally posted by tweedledunn @Jul 25 2017, 03:37 PM
This is beautiful.
Maxim Poulin || D || Winnipeg Jets || Kelowna Knights
Age: 19
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 205 lbs
Number: 52
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
S38 GP 50, G 6, A 15, +8, PIM 32, HIT 52, SB 27
S39
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Statistics:
S37 GP 6, A 1, -2, PIM 2, HIT 4, SB 4
S38 GP 6, G 2, +1, PIM 0, HIT 5, SB 11
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions/Achievements
S37 Free Agent Signed to Mammoths
S38 8th Overall to the Kelowna Knights
S38 Gold Medal Winner as a Rookie - Russia
S39 23rd Overall to the Winnipeg Jets
S40 Win Four Star Cup
S41 Win Four Star Cup
S42 Called up to Winnipeg Jets
l
Zinaida "Zina" Titova || ex-SFP Co || LW
Age: 20
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 150 lbs
Number: 16
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL
S34 Made Captain of the Mammoths
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
S31 Signed with Montreal Militia
S32 Drafted 10th to Colorado Mammoths
S33 Drafted 17th to Seattle Riot
S35 Traded to Portland
S36 MIA with Mob, Retired
Jersey retired with Mammoths S38
Wally Head Office
El Dumbo - Big Spoon - Both Handed
Stallone as Rocky? Or Stallone as Stallone?
Kyle Wahlters || Former General Manager
------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
SHL
Portland Admirals AGM - S31 | 21-27-2 |
Portland Admirals GM - S32 | 7-40-3 |
Portland Admirals GM - S33 | 20-24-6 |
Portland Admirals GM - S34 | 30-16-4 | Western Conference Champion
Portland Admirals GM - S35 | 29-18-3 | Western Conference Champion
Calgary Dragons HC - S59 | 42-20-4 | Lost in Quarterfinals
Calgary Dragons HC - S60 | 38-21-7 | Lost in Western Conference Finals
Calgary Dragons HC - S61 | 34-26-6 | Lost in Quarterfinals
Calgary Dragons AGM - S62 | 36-23-7 | Lost in First Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S63 | 36-22-8 | Lost in First Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S64 | 19-43-4 | Lost in First Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S65 | 38-23-5 | Lost in First Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S66 | 38-26-2 | Lost in Second Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S67 | 47-16-3 | Lost in Second Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S68 | 46-16-4 | Lost in Second Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S69 | 13-50-3 | DNQ
Toronto North Stars GM - S70 | 6-57-3 | DNQ
Toronto North Stars GM - S71 | 10-56-0 | DNQ
Toronto North Stars GM - S72 | 14-48-4 | DNQ
Toronto North Stars GM - S73 | 22-39-5 | Lost in First Round
Toronto North Stars GM - S74 | 30-33-3 | Lost in First Round
SMJHL
Montreal Militia AGM - S45 | 29-19-2 | Lost in Quarterfinals
Montreal Militia AGM - S46 | 24-21-5 | Lost in Semi-Finals
IIHF
Austria GM - S57 | 3-8-1
Austria GM - S58 | 2-9-1
Austria GM - S59 | 1-9-2
Austria GM - S60 | 3-9-0
Austria GM - S61 | 5-7-0
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards:
S34 Lance Uppercut Award
S60 Coach of the Year Award
S61 Coach of the Year Award
Oleksander Olli O'Koivu || C || Regina Elk || Rookie
Name: Oleksander Olli O'Koivu
Age: 17
Birthplace: Netherlands
------------------------------------------------------------
Cale Amundsen || G || Calgary/Seattle || 1,298 TPE
Name: Cale Amundsen
Age: 21
Birthplace: Netherlands
IIHF Affiliation: Austria
------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
SHL Regular Season Totals:
S55 - 5 GP | 4-0-1 | 3 SO | .958 SV% | 0.59 GAA | 79 GR
S56 - 5 GP | 3-2-0 | 1 SO | .914 SV% | 1.81 GAA | 70 GR
S57 - 20 GP | 15-2-0 | 3 SO | .924 SV% | 1.51 GAA | 67 GR
S58 - 18 GP | 15-2-0 | 1 SO | .927 SV% | 1.72 GAA | 74 GR
S59 - 24 GP | 18-5-1 | 1 SO | .906 SV% | 2.61 GAA | 69 GR
S60 - 29 GP | 15-10-3 | 2 SO | .921 SV% | 2.81 GAA | 79 GR
S61 - 50 GP | 26-19-4 | 2 SO | .919 SV% | 2.86 GAA | 77 GR
S62 - 47 GP | 24-15-5 | 2 SO | .918 SV% | 3.26 GAA | 76 GR
SHL Playoff Totals:
S60 - 11 GP | 5-4-1 | 1 SO | .930 SV% | 2.75 GAA | 81 GR
S61 - 10 GP | 5-3-2 | 1 SO | .931 SV% | 2.38 GAA | 82 GR
S62 - 7 GP | 3-3-1 | 0 SO | .911 SV% | 3.78 GAA | 78 GR
SMJHL Regular Season Totals:
S53 - 43 GP | 21-17-4 | 5 SO | .919 SV% | 2.68 GAA | 74 GR
S54 - 41 GP | 28-10-3 | 5 SO | .911 SV% | 2.31 GAA | 69 GR
S55 - 40 GP | 26-8-5 | 6 SO | .917 SV% | 2.06 GAA | 69 GR
S56 - 42 GP | 25-14-3 | 7 SO | .914 SV% | 2.45 GAA | 70 GR
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards:
S53 SMJHL 1st Team
S53 SMJHL All-Rookie Team
S53 SMJHL Esa Anrikkanen Trophy
S53 SMJHL Tom Corcoran Trophy
S54 SMJHL East All-Star
S54 SMJHL Tom Corcoran Nominee
S55 SMJHL East All-Star
S55 SMJHL King-Kurczewski Gauntlet
S55 Four Star Cup Championship
S56 SMJHL East All-Star
S56 SMJHL 2nd Team
S56 SMJHL King-Kurczewski Gauntlet
S56 Playoff MVP Nominee
S56 SMJHL Tom Corcoran Trophey
S60 Newfoundland Berserker Hall of Fame Inductee
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
S53 Drafted #13 OA by the Newfoundland Berserkers
S54 Drafted #23 OA by the Chicago Syndacite
S54 Traded to the Calgary Dragons
S54 Signed a 3yr/$7.5m contract
S56 Signed a 3 yr/$9m contract extension
Olli O'Koivu || G || POR/MIN Retired || S39 Cup Champion
Name: Olli O'Koivu
Age: 31
Birthplace: Finland (Played for Ireland)
------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics:
SHL Regular Season Totals:
269 GP | 146-89-34 | 20 SO | .910 SV% | 2.75 GAA
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards:
S33 All-Rookie Team
S34 Cole Reinhart Trophy
S35 Mike Honcho Trophy
S35 John McBride Trophy
S35 Aiden Richan Trophy
S35 1st Team All-Star
S35 Cole Reinhart Trophy
S37 IIHF Silver Medal
S38 2nd Team All-Star
S38 John McBride Nominee
S38 Ron Mexico Nominee
S39 2nd Team All-Star
S39 John McBride Nominee
S39 Mathias Chouinard Trophy
S39 Challenge Cup
S39 IIHF Bronze Medal
S39 IIHF Top Goalie
S40 Mathias Chouinard Trophy
S41 IIHF Bronze Medal
S41 IIHF Top Goalie
S42 Damian Littleton Nominee
Aleksi O'Koivu-Volkova || G || HAM/CAL Retired || S50 Cup Champion
Name: Aleksi O'Koivu-Volkova
Age: 17
Birthplace: Russia
------------------------------------------------------------
S50 Challenge Cup
S51 Bronze IIHF
fgh Registered
Somehow was a GM
Posts: 10,158
Threads: 420
Joined: Aug 2014
Reputation:
0
Pronouns: Undisclosed
Quote: Originally posted by CRUTCHFIELD+Jul 25 2017, 03:39 PM--><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1' id='QUOTE-WRAP'><tr><td>QUOTE (CRUTCHFIELD @ Jul 25 2017, 03:39 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->
It's weird u know so much about the pregnancy and you aren't the father allegedly I don't buy it
Everyone slam money on c[/b]
Quote: Originally posted by mpc@Jul 25 2017, 03:37 PM<br />
The math checks out:
Announces at the end of the playoffs (mid-May)
[b]Probably announces at the 5 week - 2 month mark
Offseason lasts an eternity
Kids are born ready to start S42[/b]
<!--QuoteBegin-galatix@Jul 25 2017, 03:37 PM
Don't you read[/quote]