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AssPancakes · 03-25-2018, 01:27 PM

word count 2581
Ready to be graded

14. Texas Renegades
Edit: take this with a grain of salt. Im canadian.

For me Texas is known as a very sketchy state in general. Mainly people who are ultra protective of guns and are super racist. Not as racist as other states (looks at Alabama) but fairly racist. I am not really sure if it is true, I am assuming that the city parts are somewhat reasonable so I turned to other sources. So for states like Texas I found a ranking system that USNews put out because I do not know the quality of the state as I am a Canadian who has never lived in the US. For Texas, they were ranked 36th out of 50. Funny enough the one thing I thought would be the worst was actually not. Their crime rate is around the middle of the pack (27th out of 50) which I found quite shocking and interesting. Their infrastructure is also quite solid although I do not know if it is anymore since Harvey but I am sure the relief effort is underway and made great progress. That may be a bit lower right now because of that but overall Im going to take USNews’s word that they actually have nice things. This is where things go VERY downhill. Quality of life is some of the worst at 46th in the country. That is despite their economy being one of the best at 8th. The death warrant was signed when their healthcare was 38th and education was 37th in the country. The US healthcare and education system are already quite awful… Imagine being among the worst in the country. They are last because of those and a very poor quality of life. Did learn some things about Texas though!
13. West Kendall Platoon
West Kendall is has all the bad parts about living in Miami like the crime and drug problems without any of the benefits. Per the national average of 100k people which crime rate is usually calculated, there are usually are 2800 violent crimes in a population consisting of 100k people. You can take that however you will that is the national average and keep in mind that is not violent crimes like assault and murder. In West fucking Kendall, there is around 3600 crimes per 100k people. That is awful. Not to mention is isn’t as developed as a city and from my understanding protected by the national guard (correct me if I am wrong) Which is awful. Their population is less than 200k people and you have a huge crime rate. Not a great place to live especially when you have that many issues.

12. Buffalo Stampede
So on most places I tried to find hard stats for, generally most major cities in the US are on them. Buffalo is apparently so bad, it isn’t. According to Forbes, it is the 10th worst cities to live in safety wise. No joke. It is also actually quite a small city. Admittedly I didn’t expect it to be that small considering how many things they have. They got an NFL and NHL team (and an SHL team) but have less than 500k population. Was quite shocking, but I am learning. Yeah tbh them being the 10th least safe city is pretty shit. Probably don’t want to live there. Also not really worth my time to roast hard but you get the jist.
11. Hamilton Steelhawks
So here is the first Canadian city on my list. I am going to have a bit more bias because of the general lower crime rate and the better universal healthcare and higher overall quality of life. Keep in mind this is because of the federal government being one of the best in the world for a lot of these things. So it is not bias as much as it is just Canada being a “better country to live in” although there are infinitely better cities to live in because Hamilton is a hell hole. SO you know how 3600 is pretty bad for crime rate? Yeahhhhhhhh there are just under 4600 crimes reported per 100k people… What the actual shit. I knew it was bad, but that is actually the worst on the list. AND WE HAVE BUFFALO. It is also a very bad place to live in general, the cons very much outweigh the benefits of living in Hamilton and the only good thing there is a Football team who haven’t won fuck all since 1999 in a league with 9 teams (8 back then if you want to rub salt in the wound). Somehow someway people in Hamilton do earn a quite respectable wage (around 70k USD per year average) which is quite good for a population of 500k people. I want to put this city last but they do have benefits.
10. New England Wolfpack
I am going to be honest, I thought this place was a state. Today I learned it is a rough area between like 4 states. I don’t really know how it originated but the important thing is that it includes Boston. Boston as a city isn’t actually bad. The only issue is that when I was trying to find good things about New England I found the same bullshit and lies and nothing that actually makes New England a good place. Boston has a somewhat mediocre quality of life and it also contains some of the worst fans in sports. Crime rate is slightly better than Buffalo and West Kendall and that is a driving factor, although being better than the 10th worst and West fucking Kendell is not a good thing to be proud of. Compared to West Kendell, New England’s crime rate is around 3300 mark. Compared to the 3600 mark that West Kendall has.

9. Los Angeles Panthers
When I was making a rough list based off my opinion I thought this team would be one of the worst. I have heard some very bad things about certain areas of Los Angeles. Imagine “west side phili but bigger” is what I was told about south side Los Angeles (I think south side is sketch part right). None the less they somehow have a really high quality of life. But this is where I am quite confident that a list I used was somewhat biased. Even though LA was 29th, I felt that they should been lower. Especially considering they ranked LA’s quality of life 2nd in the country. Im not buying that when you got a massive area with the poverty that they are at. I agree that there is a massive part of the population who is quite wealthy and well off (I mean it’s LA) but there is a very poor population as well and I am under the belief that a city needs to be able to help and support someone who is unable to support themselves. Los Angeles seems to do the opposite. From my understanding they are put in a situation that they cannot come out from unless they ‘strike gold’ in some way or another.

8. Calgary Dragons
As much as I want to shit talk Calgary, a level of respect is there. They do have a lot to offer as a city. Between world renound events like the Calgary stampede and other smaller festivals they are quite a solid city. My bias will come to play here, as well as my knowledge of the city. So to start out, it isn’t bad. All things considered, Calgary is a fine city. Their healthcare is huge and most Alberta based oil companies are based in Calgary compared to Edmonton. While the wealth goes a long ways, the rest of Calgary does not shape up too well. Crime rate and poverty is considerably worse but not anything like those before them on this list. Calgary is an OK city on this list. Their ranking pretty well reflects that, despite somehow them being ranked really low on the list. Not to mention their crime worse is slightly worse than those below them. Which as you know by now, I value a lot.

7. San Francisco Pride
Clint is on this team. Usually I would rank this last. Yet, San Fran has lot of wealth in it. Depending who you ask, San Francisco is a really nice city or absolute shit hole. The shit hole argument seems to come from on industry and one industry only, that being the service industry. I have heard of some very poor things like security is one of the worse in the country among major cities, but their education and healthcare are 5th best according to Wallethub. Their economy isn’t to shabby ranking in at 5th in the country. The good thing is that they rank 1st in quality of life in the United states. From Wallethub’s perspective, it is very clear they the “quality of life” perspective Is from a wealthy perspective. Granted that is how you should really think of San Francisco, a really good city if you have money. I want to look from all perspectives. Hence why they are 7th.

6. Winnipeg Jets
Usually Winnipeg upsets once again. Although in 5 years you can easily seem then replacing Calgary on this list, Winnipeg is a decent hockey city. Their support of both jets teams says a lot. Their murder rate is very high, despite overall crime being quite low. Winnipeg is the only major city In Manitoba and is not the worst place by far. While this is a boarderlie city in a lot of aspects, I would say it is OK. The cities behind them are awful and the cities infront of them are good. Winnipeg is the most fringe city I can think of. Every city ranked better than this is a solid city that I would recommend raising a child in for various reasons.
4. Manhattan Rage
Manhattan was also a really neat place to learn about. So New York is essentially like multiple towns or cities combined. Manhattan is the super rich wealthy part of New York. Most of the towers and big buisnesses are here. While the slums are in the other areas. You may be asking, hold on why is Manhattan 4th? It is a super rich and wealthy area with a metric fuckton of wealth! Yes but this list is where is the best place to live. Manhattan is often an popular target for terrorism or bombings, meaning that there is always a threat. Plus there is a high amount of people per square foot unlike the other cities. The infrastructure is also dated and the healthcare centers are often overwhelmed. Mental health is also very bad in Manhattan so violent crime to non-violent crime ratio is quite high. None the less, there are a significant amount of benefits of living in Manhattan if you are rich, and SHL players meet that qualification so it is a great place to live for any SHL player.
4. Edmonton Blizzard
Disclaimer, I live in Edmonton so I kind of have a bias. While their sports teams have been historically a joke, Edmonton has been a quite solid city to live in. While the weather is probably the worst on the list, there aren’t many bad things to say about Edmonton. Yeah the transit is shit, but it is better than some other cities in Canada and certainly better than some in the US. Healthcare and education are very good and we have some of the cleanest water in the world! All the festivals that go on year round like K-Days and the Fringe are great for people to visit and not be too touristy. Generally it is a nice city, big enough to be comfortable but not too big so Edmonton is pretty high for that reason.
3.Toronto North Stars
People often think Toronto of the “New York” of Canada and to an extent that is true. If their mayor isn’t doing coke in the back, Toronto is a great place to live and visit. Crime rate is actually surprisingly low for a city that big but the police there are regarded quite highly. Toronto has some really big landmarks and tourist destinations like the CN Tower and the CN Tower… But don’t forget to see the CN Tower. Seriously. Toronto has all the good things of living in a big American city, but without living in an American city. Also the rich hockey culture of hockey fans runs deep in the sewers of the Toronto downtown core, and they support their team with all of their heart. In all reality, Toronto is a great city and if you love to be in a city, then Toronto is a great place to live!
2. Seattle Riot
According to Wallethub, Seattle is the 2nd best city to live in. It uses economy as it’s most important measurement for their ranking. So even though the number 1 on their list isn’t an SHL franchise (Virgina Beach for whatever reason) I feel that economy is less important than poverty and crime rates which can make any city look terrible. All things considered their safety rank is ranked 34th in the country. While 34th is not bad by any means (this includes smaller towns and stuffs) I cannot give it 1st place. Poverty rates is also slightly higher because Seattle is an expensive city in general; Both to visit and to live. Wallethub gives them the affordability rank of 50th in the country. Although for an SHL player who makes millions, you will be just fine. This is where things become very good and why they are 2nd. Their economy is ranked 1st in the United States and so does their Education and Health care. Which is huge! The best cherry on top is that their quality of life in the country is the 4th best.
1. Minnesota Chiefs
Woah! Minnesota 1st??? What the hell? So hear me out here. I find Wallethub biased. When I look at their rankings (I will link below) Everything is super skewed for cities who are economic powerhouses. You know how I mentioned that Seattle was 4th in quality of life? Well the three cities ranked above them are San Francisco, New York, and Las Vegas. I can agree if you are wealthy, all three cities are great! But for the general population that is terrible. When I look at USNews, I know they aren’t as biased in that aspect. While Minnesota’s economy isn’t by any means the best, they make up for it in every other aspect. And not to mention their economy is slightly above average (for a US state) with economy being ranked 20th and fiscal stability at 24th. Both out of 50. On top of that, Health Care is 7th, and education is 13th. Their opportunity is ranked 3rd best in the country while their infrastructure ranks 6th. Minnesota’s crime is 11th best which is pretty respectful. And the quality of life is ranked 2nd in the country. Only North fucking Dakota is ranked higher. I don’t know why but I am sure it isn’t absurd. This makes the Minnesota Chiefs the best place to move to in order to play hockey in the SHL. Take notes FA and Upcomming draftees!

Hope you enjoyed my ranking! Hope it gives you some food for thought about your current SHL team and why you should maybe not live in Texas. Hope you enjoyed and have a great debate in chat!

Sources:
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/rankings
https://wallethub.com/edu/best-worst-large-...-live-in/14358/
http://www.moneysense.ca/canadas-best-plac...ur-own-ranking/

.bojo · 03-25-2018, 01:30 PM

At least our pancakes don't taste like ass

AssPancakes · 03-25-2018, 01:33 PM

Quote:Originally posted by .bojo@Mar 25 2018, 10:30 AM
At least our pancakes don't taste like ass

No just your city :D

CFJ · 03-25-2018, 01:43 PM

Jets should be #1 or #2 to Toronna, #WhiteOut

Thanks to prettyburn, TML, Carpy, JNH, Jepox, Engi, Karey, Flappy, Skolpadder, Mook, DollarAndADream, Smirnov and Toe for the sigs.

Code:
Crossfit's First Career SHL Goal, 4. Manhattan Rage , Crossfit Jesus 1 (Pedro Sarantez, Nucky Toohoots) at 5:51

Code:
Devitt's First Career SHL Goal, 5. Calgary Dragons , Prince Devitt 1 (Barry Batsbak 21, Mike Izzy 14) at 10:43

AssPancakes · 03-25-2018, 01:46 PM

Quote:Originally posted by CFJ@Mar 25 2018, 10:43 AM
Jets should be #1 or #2 to Toronna, #WhiteOut

You were the only Canadian city other than hamilton to have an Increase in murder from 2016 to 2017. tbh I could have argued them to be a lot lower lol

CFJ · 03-25-2018, 01:56 PM

Quote:Originally posted by AssPancakes@Mar 25 2018, 12:46 PM

You were the only Canadian city other than hamilton to have an Increase in murder from 2016 to 2017. tbh I could have argued them to be a lot lower lol

Well most of the players live in gated or the rich areas, away from the shithole areas.

Thanks to prettyburn, TML, Carpy, JNH, Jepox, Engi, Karey, Flappy, Skolpadder, Mook, DollarAndADream, Smirnov and Toe for the sigs.

Code:
Crossfit's First Career SHL Goal, 4. Manhattan Rage , Crossfit Jesus 1 (Pedro Sarantez, Nucky Toohoots) at 5:51

Code:
Devitt's First Career SHL Goal, 5. Calgary Dragons , Prince Devitt 1 (Barry Batsbak 21, Mike Izzy 14) at 10:43

.bojo · 03-25-2018, 01:58 PM

Quote:Originally posted by AssPancakes@Mar 25 2018, 12:33 PM

No just your city :D

That's only when <a href='index.php?showuser=1546' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Slappydoodle</a> was around. Now it's more of a faint pee smell

AssPancakes · 03-25-2018, 01:59 PM

Quote:Originally posted by CFJ@Mar 25 2018, 10:56 AM

Well most of the players live in gated or the rich areas, away from the shithole areas.

Every place here has a rich gated areas. Players sometimes have to interact with the peasants to make themselves look relateable

Muerto · 03-25-2018, 02:10 PM

I live in Edmonton IRL and there's no way it is ranked higher than NYC or Los Angeles tbh

Cool article tho!

AssPancakes · 03-25-2018, 02:14 PM

Quote:Originally posted by Muerto@Mar 25 2018, 11:10 AM
I live in Edmonton IRL and there's no way it is ranked higher than NYC or Los Angeles tbh

Cool article tho!

Same :D It is a lot safer than NYC or LA. Safety was a very big factor in this. Size of the city did play a role in that too.

iamslm22 · 03-25-2018, 02:25 PM

That is the worst description of New York City I've ever read in my entire life.

***WannabeFinn*** · 03-25-2018, 02:28 PM

Quote:Originally posted by AssPancakes@Mar 25 2018, 12:27 PM

For me Texas is known as a very sketchy state in general. Mainly people who are ultra protective of guns and are super racist. Not as racist as other states (looks at Alabama) but fairly racist. I am not really sure if it is true, I am assuming that the city parts are somewhat reasonable so I turned to other sources. So for states like Texas I found a ranking system that USNews put out because I do not know the quality of the state as I am a Canadian who has never lived in the US. For Texas, they were ranked 36th out of 50. Funny enough the one thing I thought would be the worst was actually not. Their crime rate is around the middle of the pack (27th out of 50) which I found quite shocking and interesting. Their infrastructure is also quite solid although I do not know if it is anymore since Harvey but I am sure the relief effort is underway and made great progress. That may be a bit lower right now because of that but overall Im going to take USNewsâ€™s word that they actually have nice things. This is where things go VERY downhill. Quality of life is some of the worst at 46th in the country. That is despite their economy being one of the best at 8th. The death warrant was signed when their healthcare was 38th and education was 37th in the country. The US healthcare and education system are already quite awfulâ€¦ Imagine being among the worst in the country. They are last because of those and a very poor quality of life. Did learn some things about Texas though!

This is so wrong lol

storm · 03-25-2018, 02:53 PM

Quote:Originally posted by WannabeFinn@Mar 25 2018, 01:28 PM

This is so wrong lol

Havenâ€™t you heard? Texas is easily the sketchiest state in the US.

Rolleyes

AssPancakes · 03-25-2018, 03:23 PM

Quote:Originally posted by iamslm22+Mar 25 2018, 11:25 AM--><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1' id='QUOTE-WRAP'><tr><td>QUOTE (iamslm22 @ Mar 25 2018, 11:25 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>That is the worst description of New York City I've ever read in my entire life.[/b]

Its only from what I read. It is also Manhattan not New York because the team is Manhattan... I don't know if that helps me in this case but I had to look at a lot of cities

<!--QuoteBegin-WannabeFinn@Mar 25 2018, 11:28 AM

This is so wrong lol[/quote]
Yeah looks like my subtle hate against Texas showed. I think I should have swapped them and West Kendall

drodger91 · 03-25-2018, 03:58 PM

I come here for hockey, I leave with knowledge. Great article, although any region around the GTA is a shit hole :lol:

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