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Tilting is the best
#1
(This post was last modified: 01-07-2019, 02:50 AM by Tomasnz. Edit Reason: Additional quotes added )

This is the realworld, hockey edition. This week we followed Peter Larson and Maxime Bouchard team mates on the Anchorage Amarda in the SMJHL. This week they have just lost twice to title rivals the Montreal Militia. And they seem to be a little tilted by the experience. 

Now during one of their rare breaks they have decided to walk around anchorage talking shit about the militia, with their fans. After several enjoyable hours these were some of the highlights. 

Lance Freiburg who used to be a goalie in a rival league enjoyed ripping into the Militia goalie Petr Vrana. " In my day we used to only play two seasons of the junior's! This is outrageous they should pack that him off to the team that drafted him! We also used to eat cereal with two pucks in it for flavouring everyday, I bet no militia player does that!"

Tiny Tim also had this to say about Petr Vrana. "I used to really like the guy, I actually bought the jersey and everything when he got drafted. But now.. it's four years later and I haven't even got to wear it once. I don't even fit it anymore" at that point it became clear they had hit on an emotional nerve and both players made excuses to head back to the training complex. 

At the complex they continue the conversation with the rest of the locker room. The realworld caught the following conversations. 
"Although grok, Cain and vrana are still hanging around from my class, they should get out of the way for rookies"
"I suck at being mean so let’s see what I can think of"
"A blind guy can stop more pucks than their goalie"
"Montreal's uniforms looked like garbage bins"
"My brother is going to run Vrana when he finally finds the bollocks to make the step up to the shl"
“The only reason he’s still down in the minors is because he knows he’ll be leakier than a faucet against the SHL”
“He’s like the high school dropout hanging out with the 5th graders cause they think he’s cool”
“If the SHL has a clue they’ll stop letting these older players jam up quality ice time against youngsters”
"I fucking love it"
“That damn scrub rode his horseshoe so hard today I think it’s now buried somewhere in his upper intestine”
"The next time we play those Red Bull cans I’m going to show them some fucking Monster Energy you can bet your life on that”
"Hulksmash"
“I swear to god if he isn’t putting pillows underneath his jersey to make his size bigger my name is ArGarBarGar”
“With all the blood that rushed to his head after he stood on it for so long today you have to wonder if he has any brain cells left”
"bring the mtl hate back"

Great stuff from what was clearly an inebriated locker room, fresh off two harsh loses. 

The realworld crew also caught on filmfilm P Larson having a cry in his hotel room after the two game series, "I just wanted to be great, *sob*, how could anyone start me again after those third period, *sob* disasters, Petr didn't even let one though! I am the worst goalie in the universe" it went on for much much longer rants about Hank and other names the Realworld team couldn't descipher. But that's all we had time for today, tune in next week to find out what defensive star Leopold Lockhart has brewing in his garage.

Ready for grading word count 620ish split with @Weretarantula who had the idea for this story that I ran with .

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#2

#vranaisascrub

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Maxime Bouchard
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Richard Dickbutt McFudderdudder II
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#3

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Credit to Ml002, King, Wasty, Carpy, Bruins10, Rum_Ham, Turd Ferguson, Ragnar and Enigmatic for the sigs.
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#4

OOH IM DOING MY FACE WITH MAGIC MARKER,
IM IN MY RIGHT PLACE, DON'T BE A DOWNER
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#5

01-06-2019, 08:31 PMWhite Cornerback Wrote: OOH IM DOING MY FACE WITH MAGIC MARKER,
IM IN MY RIGHT PLACE, DON'T BE A DOWNER

What on earth

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Maxime Bouchard
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Richard Dickbutt McFudderdudder II
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#6

Cry

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Renegades  raiders  Finland
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#7

01-06-2019, 08:55 PMWeretarantula Wrote:
01-06-2019, 08:31 PMWhite Cornerback Wrote: OOH IM DOING MY FACE WITH MAGIC MARKER,
IM IN MY RIGHT PLACE, DON'T BE A DOWNER

What on earth

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RBzsjga73s
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#8

01-06-2019, 09:51 PMMarc Bradford Wrote: Cry

Awww I wanted bants not sadness

<3

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Maxime Bouchard
Armada Dragons Info - Updates  Dragons Armada
Richard Dickbutt McFudderdudder II
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