Yes, the incredibly complicated Russian name "Nikolai."

Zach Evans || Forward || Winnipeg Jets
Name: Zach Evans
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 195 lbs
Number: 18
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SHL Career Statistics:
S32 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 9, A: 5, P: 14, +/-: -1, PIMS: 12, H: 59
S33 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 8, A: 15, P: 23, +/-: 3, PIMS: 49, H: 106
S34 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 14, A: 14, P: 28, +/-: 7, PIMS: 46, H: 96
S35 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 22, A: 26, P: 48, +/-: -4, PIMS: 23, H: 113
S36 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 28, A: 30, P: 58, +/-: 23, PIMS: 51, H: 140
S37 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 24, A: 27, P: 51, +/-: 2, PIMS: 36, H: 220
S38 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 27. A: 38, P: 65, +/-: 12, PIMS: 45, H: 158
S39 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 15, A: 32, P: 47, +/-: 11, PIMS: 43, H: 85
S40 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 22, A: 31, P: 53, +/-: 11, PIMS: 15, H: 49
S41 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 27, A: 35, P: 62, +/-: 26, PIMS: 34, H: 82
S42 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 16, A: 29, P: 45, +/-: -3, PIMS: 15, H: 6
S43 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 16, A: 29, P: 45, +/-: 11, PIMS: 27, H: 15
S44 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 14, A: 31, P: 45, +/-: 3, PIMS: 17, H: 17
S45 (WPG): GP: 50, G: 15, A: 34, P: 49, +/-: 4, PIMS: 2, H: 27
CAREER: GP: 700, G: 257, A: 376, P: 633, +/-: 105, PIMS: 415, H: 1,173
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SHL Playoff Statistics:
S34 (WPG): GP: 5, G: 2, A: 1, P: 3, +/-: 0, PIMS: 4, H: 7
S36 (WPG): GP: 6, G: 0, A: 3, P: 3, +/-: -1, PIMS: 0, H: 16
S37 (WPG): GP: 18, G: 11, A: 14, P: 25, +/-: 19, PIMS: 12, H: 81
S38 (WPG): GP: 13, G: 6, A: 9, P: 15, +/-: 5, PIMS: 4, H: 32
S39 (WPG): GP: 13, G: 5, A: 6, P: 11, +/-: -2, PIMS: 6, H: 31
S40 (WPG): GP: 14, G: 5, A: 4, P: 9, +/-: 1, PIMS: 13, H: 7
S41 (WPG): GP: 13, G: 8, A: 6, P: 14, +/-: 3, PIMS: 9, H: 26
S43 (WPG): GP: 17, G: 4, A: 9, P: 13, +/-: 11, PIMS: 2, H: 4
S44 (WPG): GP: 18, G: 4, A: 15, P: 19, +/-: 7, PIMS: 0, H: 3
S45 (WPG): GP: 4, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -1, PIMS: 0, H: 2
CAREER: GP: 121, G: 46, A: 69, P: 115, +/-: 41, PIMS: 50, H: 209
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SMJHL Career Statistics:
S30 (DET): GP: 50, G: 16, A: 12, P: 28, +/-: 8, PIMS: 10, H: 44
S31 (DET): GP: 50, G: 15, A: 23, P: 38, +/-: -2, PIMS: 35, H: 84
CAREER: GP: 100, G: 31, A: 35, P: 66, +/-: 6, PIMS: 45, H: 128
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SMJHL Playoff Statistics:
S30 (DET): GP: 5, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -1, PIMS: 2, H: 0
S31 (DET): GP: 13, G: 5, A: 7, P: 12, +/-: 3, PIMS: 0, H: 9
CAREER: GP: 18, G: 5, A: 8, P: 13, +/-: 2, PIMS: 2, H: 9
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IIHF Statistics (Russia):
S30: GP: 11, G: 1, A: 0, P: 1, +/-: -1, PIMS: 0, H: 7
S32: GP: 13, G: 1, A: 1, P: 2, +/-: -4, PIMS: 4, H: 17
S33: GP: 11, G: 3, A: 6, P: 9, +/-: 5, PIMS: 4, H: 12
S34: GP: 11, G: 6, A: 2, P: 8, +/-: 2, PIMS: 2, H: 10
S35: GP: 13, G: 5, A: 4, P: 9, +/-: 4, PIMS: 18, H: 22
S36: GP: 11, G: 4, A: 3, P: 7, +/-: -3, PIMS: 2, H: 5
S37: GP: 10, G: 1, A: 1, P: 2, +/-: 0, PIMS: 0, H: 8
S38: GP: 13, G: 3, A: 10, P: 13, +/-: 8, PIMS: 4, H: 5
S39: GP: 10, G: 6, A: 6, P: 12, +/-: 1, PIMS: 2, H: 11
S40: GP: 10, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -6, PIMS: 2, H: 8
S41: GP: 11, G: 4, A: 5, P: 9, +/-: 0, PIMS: 2, H: 7
S42: GP: 10, G: 5, A: 9, P: 14, +/-: 5, PIMS: 0, H: 1
S43: GP: 13, G: 4, A: 7, P: 11, +/-: 6, PIMS: 0, H: 0
S44: GP: 10, G: 4, A: 8, P: 12, +/-: 1, PIMS: 0, H: 0
S45: GP: 10, G: 6, A: 1, P: 7, +/-: -13, PIMS: 0, H: 2
CAREER: GP: 167 G: 54, A: 65, P: 119, +/-: 5, PIMS: 40, H: 105
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Transactions and Awards:
Drafted 25th overall by Detroit, S30 SMJHL Entry Draft
S30 Vyacheslav Onoprienko Trophy Winner
Drafted 5th overall by Winnipeg, S31 SHL Entry Draft
S32 Oriens Trophy Winner (Co-GM, Detroit)
S32 IIHF Bronze Medalist
S36 SHL Second-Team All-Star
S37 Challenge Cup Champion
S38 Sergei Karpotsov Trophy Winner
S38 SHL First-Team All-Star
S38 Sarmad Khan Trophy Winner
S38 Jeff Dar Trophy Winner
S38 Damian Littleton Trophy Winner
S38 IIHF Gold Medalist
S43 IIHF Silver Medalist
S44 Challenge Cup Champion
Inducted into SHL Hall of Fame, S47
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Two things are infinite.

Nikolai Evans || Defenseman || HAM/TBB/TEX
Name: Nikolai Evans
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 210 lbs
Number: 19
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SHL Career Statistics:
S47 (HAM): GP: 50, G: 1, A: 10, P: 11, +/-: -4, SB: 39, H: 32
S48 (HAM): GP: 50, G: 5, A: 9, P: 14, +/1: 6, SB: 57, H: 37
S49 (TBB): GP: 50, G: 9, A: 14, P: 23, +/-: -22, SB: 78, H: 51
S50 (TBB): GP: 50, G: 7, A: 20, P: 27, +/-: 4, SB: 64, H: 39
CAREER: GP: 200, G: 22, A: 53, P: 75, +/-: -16, SB: 238, H: 159
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SHL Playoff Statistics:
S48 (HAM): GP: 5, G: 1, A: 0, P: 1, +/-: -1, SB: 6, H: 3
S49 (TBB): GP: 12, G: 0, A: 5, P: 5, +/-: 0, SB: 20, H: 8
S50 (TBB): GP: 19, G: 5, A: 7, P: 12, +/-: 1, SB: 29, H: 6
CAREER: GP: 36, G: 6, A: 12, P: 18, +/-: 0, SB: 55, H: 17
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SMJHL Career Statistics:
S45 (MTL): GP: 50, G: 7, A: 13, P: 20, +/-: -1, SB: 60, H: 25
S46 (MTL/HFX): GP: 50, G: 7, A: 20, P: 27, +/-: -1, SB: 47, H: 68
CAREER: GP: 100, G: 14, A: 33, P: 47, +/-: -2, SB: 107, H: 93
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SMJHL Playoff Statistics:
S45 (MTL): GP: 6, G: 2, A: 3, P: 5, +/-: -1, SB: 7, H: 4
S46 (HFX): GP: 13, G: 3, A: 2, P: 5, +/-: -4, SB: 18, H: 14
CAREER: GP: 19, G: 5, A: 5, P: 10, +/-: -5, SB: 25, H: 18
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IIHF Statistics (Russia):
S45: GP: 10, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -5, SB: 12, H: 2
S46: GP: 12, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -2, SB: 11, H: 2
S47: GP: 12, G: 2, A: 7, P: 9, +/-: 2, SB: 17, H: 12
S48: GP: 12, G: 2, A: 4, P: 6, +/-: -6, SB: 22, H: 0
S49: GP: 15, G: 6, A: 6, P: 12, +/-: -6, SB: 25, H: 7
CAREER: GP: 61, G: 10, A: 19, P: 29, +/-: -17, SB: 87, H: 23
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WJC Statistics:
S44 (World): GP: 15, G: 6, A: 7, P: 13, +/-: 8, SB: 18, H: 13
S45 (Russia): GP: 22, G: 2, A: 10, P: 12, +/-: -13, SB: 33, H: 14
S46 (Russia): GP: 28, G: 9, A: 15, P: 23, +/-: 0, SB: 26, H: 14
CAREER: GP: 55, G: 17, A: 32, P: 48, +/-: -5, SB: 77, H: 41
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Transactions and Awards:
Drafted 1st overall by Montreal, S45 SMJHL Entry Draft
Drafted 1st overall by Hamilton, S46 SHL Entry Draft
Traded to Halifax Raiders during S46 SMJHL season
Traded to Tampa Bay Barracuda prior to S49 SHL season
S48 Fantasy Global Champion
S50 Mathias Chouinard Trophy Winner
I'll finish updating this at some point
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The Russian Prince

Zdenko Beranek || Winger || Quebec City Citadelles
Name: Zdenko Beranek
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 175 lbs
Number: 27
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SMJHL Career Statistics:
S55 (QCC): GP: 50, G: 6, A: 15, P: 21, +/-: -22, PIMS: 6
S56 (QCC): GP: 50, G: 10, A: 27, P: 37, +/-: 9, PIMS: 20
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Transactions and Awards:
Drafted 1st overall by Quebec City, S55 SMJHL Entry Draft
Drafted 18th overall by Seattle, S56 SHL Entry Draft
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Le Petite Chèvre

Yes, the incredibly complicated Russian name "Nikolai."

Listen, you pinko commie bastarf, you should have a solid American name like Nicky Boombots or Tom Cruise or Bob Seger. Like a rock!