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Weekend Funtime: The GOAT List
#61
(This post was last modified: 02-03-2019, 01:46 AM by StamkosFan.)

The GOAT List

1. -ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
2. -Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
3. -Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
4. -Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
5.-Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
6..-Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
7.. -Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
8. -Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)

Explanation: The most TPE at 2285 has to be the most impressive because you only have 10 seasons before regression, so that’s 228.5 TPE per season; you only get 40 from PTs, so the rest had to be equipment and training. Of course there’s training camp, predictions, and fantasy, but he literally had to do everything, including probably the brutal stuff like PBP. That man is the hero of all us TPE whores.

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#62

-ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
-Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
-Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
-Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
-Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
-Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
-Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
-Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.


ToeDragon has to go at the top. I feel like I do plenty every week in terms of TPE, but I will never reach that mark. It's just so impressive. The blocks are also impressive, because Garbanzo is just so far ahead of anyone else, I think it could last forever. Calgary is also extremely impressive. We are having trouble making the playoffs once, so for a team to be that successful for so long is just inspiring.

                     
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#63

The GOAT list

1. Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
2. Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
3. Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
4. ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
5. Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
6. Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
7. Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards
8. Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.

Explanation: Tried to balance out how I value achievements based largely on luck and achievements based largely on hard work. Calgary making the playoffs 20 out of 21 seasons is just ridiculous and a model of success everyone should be trying to copy.

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#64

-ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
-Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
-Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
-Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
-Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
-Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
-Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
-Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.

Maybe I'm biased since I also made that push to be one of the top TPE earners in SHL history, but I know the kind of effort and long-term commitment that goes into trying to get above 2k TPE, let alone above 2.2k. It's something I truly never want to do again because of how much effort it took, and how exhausting it really was. It's one of the only ones here you can't really get lucky for.

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#65

1. Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
2. Ireland's 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
3.ToeDragon's 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history) 
Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place) 
4. Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons. 
5. Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
6. -Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net. 
7. Dan Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards. 

Explanation: as we all know, STHS is a fickle mistress, so I highly valued repeated and sustained team success in the sim over individual longevity or things a user would have more control over. At the bottom of the list are a flukey trivia stat and a penalty machine, which while receiving award, isn't exactly the most useful award to team success

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#66

-ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
-Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
-Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
-Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
-Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
-Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
-Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
-Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.

The most TPE in league history is the only individual stat I put above any team stat because there are a lot of crazy folks who put a LOT of time and effort into the league to eek out as much TPE as possible. To do that better than anyone in league history takes dedication, time, and a bit of luck as I am assuming at least some of the TPE is from correctly guessing draft orders and winners.

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#67

- Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
- Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
- Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
- Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
- Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
- ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
- Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
- Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.

In a sim that can be as random as STHS, I find team accomplishments to be somewhat more impressive than individual accomplishments, especially when they are about consistency. And making the playoffs in 20 out of 21 seasons is the biggest one for me because of that, with Ireland's and Kelowna's success being in a slightly lower but still very impressive tier.
#68

1. Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
2. Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons. 
3. Ireland's 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
4.ToeDragon's 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history) 
5.Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place) 
6. Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
7. -Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net. 
8. Dan Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards. 

Explanation: Kelownas runs are pretty cool since I was sadly a part of some of it. Monsters. 
Calgary uses voodoo, let's see them miss 20 in a row now pls.
Ireland is cool I guess. Mostly cause iihf is such a crap shoot. Toedragon is a pretty cool one since its unprecedented  The rest I just picked at random.



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#69

The GOAT list

1. Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
2. Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
3. ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
4. Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
5. Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers
6. Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
7. Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
8. Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)

Winning 7 Turdy's is amazing. Even Bono isn't that much of a Turd.

Calgary is a magical team. Esa pretty much is the old guy from Gran Torino at this point. He still refuses to quit, and will play until someone kills him.

Toe has stuck with the same player long enough to earn almost 2300 tpe. That's fucking insane.

ArGar was a monster with his last player. This would be the top one if they didn't prop his corpse up in front of the net for the last couple of seasons.

Wasty has been on the same team for 31 seasons. That's a really, really long time. Even longer in sim league time. It's ridiculous that he's been the GM of the team for so long. It'll be a sad day when that changes.

Thadeus Prince's last name is Prince. I would say it should be King with that kind or record, but King has a bit of a stigma attached now.

Ireland. This probably should be the top one, actually. They're not drunk enough if they can skate.

Kelowna is pretty impressive in its own right. But they would need 4 to be really impressive.

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#70

1. ToeDragon's 2285 TPE
2. Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons
3. Ireland's 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42 - present)
4. Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40 - S43)
5. Alonzo Garbonzo's 1738 blocks (438 more than 2nd place)
6. Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers
7. Danny Foster's 7 Turd Ferguson Awards
8. Thaddeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net

Explanation:
Being consistent enough and driven enough to accrue so much TPE to top everybody else, ever, is a ridiculous feat. That has to be the most incredible statistic. Following is Calgary's playoff streak. Logically they have to stumble at some point, and yet they haven't. Ireland is surprising in some ways, Kelowna was lucky and skilled. After that, this list loses a lot of value. Garbonzo's number is impressive, but when you've played for so much longer than anybody else ever did, no wonder you're going to be ahead. Wasty's 31 seasons is impressive as being a GM is difficult, but he became GM in S15, won the Cup in S17 on a lucky run by a back-up goaltender and has since struggled mightily and never won again. The Turd Ferguson is difficult to win consistently, but it's also a hindrance to your team. Prince is a back-up goalie, getting lucky is just part of it. And also, it's not like it's rare. A lot of goalies started out super hot or back-ups had super fantastic numbers like Blowjob Jesus who went like 18-0 or so in one stretch. Back-ups are just wild and stupid because of a small sample size and being personally played only against the weakest competition possible. There's nothing impressive here, this isn't a "GOAT" moment and no one should care about it.

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#71

The GOAT list

1.Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
2. Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
3. Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
4. ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
5.Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
6.Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
7.Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
8.Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.

Explanation: Being a GM for that long is really impressive, years and years in real life time. I put Foster to second, because I don´t think tough guys get the love they deserve in these leagues. Alonzo being able to play that kind of game even at the young age of 50 something is crazy. ToeDragon´s TPE total could have been higher in the list, but I feel like some kind of statistic like Alonzo´s blocks would be even more fun to look at. After the top-4, got the three team related, all great achievements, Calgary´s playoff run first on the board. Finally, Prince - off to great start!
#72

-Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
-Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
-Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
-ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
-Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
-Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
-Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.
-Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)


Calgary's run is pretty much the most impressive with the randomness of the sim. Kelowna winning the cups was awesome since I was goaltender on all 3 of those teams. Much of the other stuff is longevity based which we all know never gets rewarded in the SHL.

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#73

3 -Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
5 -Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
2 -ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
1 -Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
8 -Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
7 -Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
6 -Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
4 -Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.

Threepeats are epic achievements, unless it's international hockey that allows people to choose their nationality. The top 15 players in the league could all play for Ireland for all I know. Calgary? San Antonio Spurs like never miss the playoffs. Winning 29 of 34 games? What a pitifully short career. What even is a Turd Furgesson?

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#74

1 - ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
2 - Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
3 - Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
4 - Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
5 - Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
6 - Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
7 - Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
8 - Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.

As amazing as some of the in game stats are, and they should be honored accordingly, the top 4 are the people behind these great achievements that will be extremely difficult to beat. I mean the amount of time and energy you need to get your player to that level of TPE is incredible in my opinion because I can barely get three to 1000 each.

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#75

Sebastien Primeau's GOAT list

1. Calgary making the playoffs in 20 of 21 seasons.
2. Alonzo Garbanzo's 1738 blocks (438 more then 2nd place)
3. Kelowna winning 3 straight 4 star cup championships (S40-43)
4. Irelands 3 straight IIHF gold medals (S42-Present)
5. Danny Foster's 7 Turd Fergeson Awards.
6. ToeDragons 2285 TPE (most TPE in league history)
7. Thadeus Prince has a 29-4-1 lifetime SHL record in net.
8. Wasty's 31 seasons as the GM of the Panthers.

Explanation:
I tried to balance individual and team accomplishments and thus the results is there for you all to see. My focus was on what has been done on the ice more than accomplishments done in the office so I apologize to Wasty's but he must keep in mind that he is still part of an elite list, the top eight great of all time accomplishments. That is something!

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