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Lunatyck · 03-11-2019, 01:40 PM

Halo.

Przemek back here giving latest update on Polski superstar here in new liga. Is been a little time since I giving an update but I have here many news to share. First and foremost, is important to say that I have finally finding points in new liga. After taking coaching advice very serious, I giving up smoking so many papierosy aka ciggarette, my endurance is finally no longer equal to that of ruski dog. I still no top performance shape in endurance but since last update, I have upping my endurance levels significant. I also practice very much in passing, puck handling, and very most important defense. After playing now 26 games in new liga, I feel more comforting in new ice and no longer feeling very lost in small rink compared to europe ice (i still no understanding why amerikanski prefer small rink but is not my decision). So where are we now? Well I am having okay start to season with 2 goal and 3 assist so far, but I need to improving this. I am fakking Polski rocket'a so 5 points in 26 game is something that papa Mirek no happy about. He calling me the other day saying "kurwa Przemek you skating like little girl out there. One pussy guy hit you and you losing puck. Keep playing like this and you losing kielbasa kontrakt then mama and me starving because potato season no good this year!" I cannot having mama and papa starving so I need to really focusing more on second half of season.

Anyway, lets talking more about life here in Amerika and other things. I finally buying my own car here and renting my own apartament, and I finding Polski deli in Troy, MI. Selection is good and I am happy I can finally buy real Kosciuszko musztarda unlike this yellow piss that amerikanski use. Who fakking use this? Taste like bleach yellow paint. Next, I am happy to say that new kontrakt here in liga plus kielbasa kontrakt allowing me to buy my dream piece of clothing, a excellent top tier leather jacketa. I have dreaming very much back in Polska to owning such fancy jacket but Mama i Papa no affording such luxury things. I even having detroiyt logo engraving so show my respekt for my amazing team.
http://simulationhockey.com/showthread.php?tid=94419

Now lets talk some highlights from last few games, most importantly my fight that happen versus Montreal pussies. If you no know, we having huge fighting in that game because Montreal team is made up of inbred dogs and midget pussy. Here I am scoring magnificent goalski, my best friend Wibbly celebrating with me, and these pussy Montreal be crying on bench. I tell them, "go fuck mother you homeless dogs". They then saying to me "Go back to Siberia you fucking communist rat." I am very quickly anger. I say "YOU FUCKING CALL ME RUSKI YOU FUCKING STUPID IDIOT I NO FUCKING RUSKI YOU FUCKING BITCH". Then Pavel coming by and say "Polish Russian is same shit. Both poor communists rat." Then I can no longer take this bullshit. I grab Pussy Pavel Pivonka (@Schultzy) and show him why my team call me Pussy Blaster. I fakking take 18 punches right into his bitch czech mouth. I saying to him "You fucking bitch whore. You are fakking garbage and your country only good for cheap prostytutki and throwing garbage in street." Here is picture of Pavel after game:
[Image: Zach-Werenski-is-the-face-of-NHL-playoff...y.jpg?lg=5]

[Image: Zach-Werenski-is-the-face-of-NHL-playoff...y.jpg?lg=5]

I thinking I teach stupid dog lesson and send message to liga that Polski Superstar Przemysław Brzeszczyczkiewicz is here to play, not to being a bitch in this liga. The last thing I wanting to do is allow other people thinking they can talking shit to me because I no amerikanski or my english is no good. I may no speaking best english but my fists can do proper talking - just asking stupid Pavel. He tell you whatever he can remembering which I am guess is not much because I beat his head pretty bad.

Anyway, I need to go now because I no wanting to be late to practice. I looking forward to next update and until then - looking for me in scoreboard. Over and out.

-Przemek.

705 words my dudes

Snussu · 03-11-2019, 01:53 PM

amazing

*Zoone16* · 03-11-2019, 11:35 PM

This is simply amazing. Had me laughing from start to finish Smile

*Carpy48* · 03-12-2019, 04:05 PM

More of this please!

Lunatyck · 03-12-2019, 08:50 PM

03-12-2019, 04:05 PMCarpy48 Wrote: More of this please!

Thanks for the comments. It motivates me more so hopefully we will get przemeks thoughts every week. PS I hope he gets into more fights so I can do more posts like this

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