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*slothfacekilla* · 09-30-2019, 12:46 PM

Code:
E: Describe the red carpet scene leading up to the event - who's making the biggest splash? Who's wearing the wildest outfit?

Honestly, I think it is way too obvious who is making the biggest splash on the red carpet... your reigning and undisputed S49 SHL Rookie of the Year Olivier Cloutier! Olivier is not wearing the WILDEST outfit out there (that probably would go to the dude dressed up in some sort of Flamingos gear screaming about an expansion SMJHL team) but he definitely would be the most handsome and dapper person on the red carpet. Everyone would want Olivier to stop and take a picture with him because he is just so hot right now (and really, always is hot if we are being real). We are talking a super classy suit for Olivier here (probably something like a classic black one but he could pull anything off), he is looking like a real secret agent (except so much better looking and smoother than James Bond). In some of the fans' pictures with Olivier you could see Jimmy Slothface standing in the background holding Olivier's things and smiling, very proud of the superstar that Olivier has turned into. Cloutier is definitely the star of the Season 50 Anniversary Gala and we are all better for having witnessed his brilliance.

jtwilson1214 · 09-30-2019, 12:48 PM

1. I've dreamed about this moment for my entire life, the chance to be around so many SHL greats and finally meet my childhood heroes. But from the time I got the invite and saw who else was on the guest list, I knew there was one person I had to talk to. A person who had been my childhood hero since back when I was just a kid watching pirated streams of SHL games because Irish TV did not carry the games, Jasper Clayton. I spent the first 30 minutes looking for him with no luck only to realize I was going about searching all wrong. The whole time I had been looking for someone in a full-body cast saying "Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms...", I what else could be the result of blocking 1882 shots in his career. Then I realized these are hockey players we are talking about, the kind of guys who spit their teeth out and ask the trainer how fast they can be back on the bench. When I realized this it was quick to find the well-dressed man in the back of the room telling stories about the good old days in his cup runs in the early S30's. And it was then I remembered why he was the reason I started to play hockey.

ACapitalChicago · 09-30-2019, 12:50 PM

Written Task: Option A

Upon first arriving to the Gala, Weston already had his short list of people to seek out for conversation. Always trying to get advice and tips for what to do, Weston wanted to do his usual shtick of plugging his player page and update page into some people he had heard great things about. First on the list was Dani Forsberg, recommended by CFJ on the Dragons. The name was given without hesitation and Dani clearly was a successful player. Their accomplishments and awards stretched down a long list of successful time on the ice, featuring such great things as multiple All-Star team plays, three Challenge Cups, both Jeff Dar and Jay McDonald trophies, and plenty of SMJHL trophies. Hoping to learn more about how to always be producing on the ice, Weston had his first person to talk to in mind.

From there, came the next person on the list, legendary Alex Mack. A few legendary Dragons were recommended as people to look for, but holy hell did that not even begin to describe Alex Mack. As a new member of the Dragons it was up to Weston to learn their history, and no lesson would be complete without learning about Alex Mack. As Izzy himself put it, 20 seasons, 650 points, and 5 Challenge Cups. If anyone knew how to be a great player, it was Mack. Weston was certainly hoping to talk more about Calgary, both in past and its future with this all time great. While Weston had a few more names on the list, those two were of the utmost priority to find.

S66 Damian Littleton

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Mika_Kandinsky · 09-30-2019, 01:25 PM

Code:
B: What are you doing throughout the night? Who are you seated with? What's going on at your table throughout the night's events? How's the food and drink?

It's a pretty exciting night when you can get most of the SHL all out at once for an event. First thing is first, and that's hitting the open bar for some Vodka drinks. A couple shots, a few vodka soda's and maybe even a Moscow Mule for good measure. I'm hanging with the boys, so I'm there to mingle with my old teammates from the Scarecrows and also with my new teammates in Toronto. I eventually find my way to my seat where I'm sitting with the boys from Toronto and a few guys I knew in juniors. I notice that I'm sitting next to @Rublic at the event so Atlas and I are able to catch up and talk. It's been a while since we played in the prospect showcase, so it was nice to catch up. Overall, the speeches were kind of boring. The food was great though. We got a bit of surf and turf. Steak and lobster. Really nice to see the SHL shelling out and treating the players on a night such as this. Overall it was a pretty fun evening and I'm glad I got to spend some time with the boys and not worry too much about hockey for a little bit.

Slowpoke · 09-30-2019, 02:23 PM

B: What are you doing throughout the night? Who are you seated with? What's going on at your table throughout the night's events? How's the food and drink?

Piotr has the benefit of being related to one of those notable players, I wouldn’t go as far as calling him a legend, but definitely a player. Another benefit he has going for him, is playing for the same team now that his brother played for. Sitting at a table with his brother and other notable members of the Renegades roster in years past is definitely an experience worth writing home about. Vasily Horvat, Conklin Owen, Jack Durden, Geoffrey Allen, and Vladimir Lidstrom are all there. With the drinks starting to add up the old stories are starting to come out. Tales of lost opportunities and victories are both being told. All of this while looking angrily at old opponents. This is a reminder of what could be if the Renegades can get back to their old ways, and a refreshing break of from the offseason training. Being a guest has its perks sometimes.

Tate · 09-30-2019, 02:23 PM

PBE Welfare

ErM · 09-30-2019, 03:03 PM

Tor Tuck has been slamming them down with his brother Tommy since they walked in the door. They were told by their general manager that this was an event with an open bar, there may have been some other words of caution and about them behaving themselves but their attention was lost after they heard free booze. In order to fully take advantage of the situation before they found their seats or checked their coats they were at the bar ordering their second round of doubles bringing some liveliness to the affair. It was a bit of an insult to the two veterans that the younger players in the league thought the older players like the Tucks were no the true party animals. Tor and Tommy have been playing a fun game where they finish a 30 rack at every practice. For away games they make Wade Boggs look like a 80 pound girl when they’re putting back 100 beers on flight from Edmonton to Winnipeg. Needless to say, at the end of the night, Tor and Tommy were still getting their liquid bonus salary while most of the rookies in the league were in their rooms praying to the porcelain god.

@Muford

Narconis · 09-30-2019, 03:04 PM

C: As the night turns into morning and the drinks have been flowing, things start to get a bit unruly. Describe what's happening by the end of the night, once the older folks have gone home and the true party animals are in charge.

Once the older folks head back to the hotel and the real party animals take over the night will start off “slow” with rounds of drinking games typical of the “college” crown. There will be beer pong, flip cup, and various other excuses to drink copious amounts of alcohol. Then, once everyone is REALLY good and lubricated, the mood changes to sex, as it always does. Except, in this case, the boys gather round the biggest TVs they can and watch porn with the sound off, replacing it instead of Disney music. Gay porn with “Gaston”. Porn filmed in pools to the soundtrack of Little Mermaid. Nordic bitches to the sound track of Frozen. Everyone will find this hilarious until someone points out that a bunch of grown men watching porn together is “kinda gay”. This will cause a lot of discomfort and the party quickly breaks up as dozens of SHL young go back to their hotels with confused boners.

Words: 161

Lunatyck · 09-30-2019, 04:02 PM

Quote:C: As the night turns into morning and the drinks have been flowing, things start to get a bit unruly. Describe what's happening by the end of the night, once the older folks have gone home and the true party animals are in charge.

Oh boy, this one is too easy for our boy PB. Here is his story from the night.

HALO HALO. Kurwa my head hurting pretty back from hangover - FAK. Man I must saying, the gala was a time to remembering. FIrst we had to go proper formality and eating dinner, saying pledge of allegience, singing Canada and Amerika anthem, and hearing speeches. But honest I could not waiting until diskotek dj coming on for after party because I having flask of pure polska vodka in my suit that was much eager to drink. After formality over, I am sitting with teammate @hotdog , @Ace and others. They know I liking party very much so many were already expecting riot from me, and let me telling you, managerski not very happy with me but party definitely was. I will going more in detail some other time but here is quick recap.

10PM: Diskotek DJ beginning party - I bring out flask of vodka and start pouring many drinks to our table
12PM: We drink flask, and we buy 3 more bottle vodka from bartenders (they saying they no sell bottle but I give them enough money that they give me HA HA)
1AM: @Ace falling asleep in table I think he pissing himself. Hotdog barely standing. This is no good because I wanting to party more so I call my reliable friend @Wibbly McButternutz
1:15AM: Wibbly arriving with much needed kokaina - I mean allergy nose medicine - and beautiful prostytutki
2AM: I no remember wibbly leaving or why I having no shirt on, but we are all dancing. @Julio Tokolosh squirting milk from nipples on everyone around and we having good time but DJ saying time to go.
4AM: I am in middle of dark night club with 9 girl and @hotdog and @Julio Tokolosh . White powder, absynth, and girls everywhere. Cannot discuss further.
7AM: I waking up in my apartament with bow tie, santa boxers, and timberland boots. Faking killer hangover but lucky no losing wallet or phone. Also 3 sexy girl with me - luckily no dirty ruski.
10AM: Discover "kielbasa kok #1 rock" tattoo on my shoulder. Oh shit Papa mirek no going to be very happy with me but I mean.. tattoo no lying either Wink

That's ail I sharing for now but be on the lookout for me attending next gala. Who know, I may no be inviting anymore

***DrunkenTeddy*** · 09-30-2019, 05:46 PM

Code:
A: Many of the notable retired players from SHL lore are in attendance at the event. What legend from the SHL past are you seeking out at the event and what will you talk about with them? Describe who you're looking for and how you go about meeting them.

I'd be seeking out Esa if he wasn't already too busy in conversation. The guy played a massively long career and only recently retired. He's definitely a guy that I'd want to chat with and shake his hand. I'd be lucky to be able to play anywhere near as long as he did.

Code:
B: What are you doing throughout the night? Who are you seated with? What's going on at your table throughout the night's events? How's the food and drink?

Being seated beside a couple great friends was a treat as I ended up sitting beside former teammate and now retired player Finn Kruger on my right and a former teammate from juniors in Sophia Bennett on my left. Kruger and I have seen each other a lot through our careers so we were fairly caught up, we mostly just talked about his retirement and plans. Bennett was great to catch up with, we won a couple four star cups together in juniors so it was great to chat about the juniors days.

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Mavfatha · 09-30-2019, 06:44 PM

PBE PT

uhh · 09-30-2019, 08:56 PM

Quote:D: You are one of the honored few asked to make a speech at the event. They give you total freedom in what you talk about - a moment in SHL history, a vision for the future of the league, anything you want. Give us an excerpt of your speech.

Later through the night, when the alcohol is flowing and inhibitions are lowered, Hariken Urawa finds himself at the podium. He has been called to the microphone -- by destiny. He gives the mic a few taps to confirm that it's on. TAP TAP TAP echoes through the speakers, followed by a, "Good, it's on."

"Hi everyone. Hariken here," he begins, assuming that everyone is on a first-name basis with him by now.

"I have a confession to make. This is something that I have struggled with for a while, because of the stigma, but I feel like this league is quickly becoming a family to me, and so I want to share something very deep and very personal.

"I like pineapple on pizza. I have for a long time, ever since I knew what pizza was. I kept it hidden because I didn't want to face the stigma associated with such a lifestyle, but to be honest, I think the stigma is misplaced. Pineapple is a perfectly delicious addition to any pizza when paired with appropriate other toppings - namely ham/bacon and some kind of spice.

"In conclusion, I'd like to invite everyone to try for yourselves." As if on cue (because it is), the staff re-enter the ballroom, carrying boxes and boxes of pineapple, ham, and jalapeno pizza."

The room erupts into applause as everyone eagerly tries the delicious pizza. Jean-Pierre Gay @"JumpierPancakes" has a slice, and as he does, his heart grows three sizes, and he becomes tearful at all he has missed out on to this point.

RaginCajun · 09-30-2019, 09:31 PM

Code:
B: What are you doing throughout the night? Who are you seated with? What's going on at your table throughout the night's events? How's the food and drink?

Alexei mostly spent the evening with his parents especially trying to keep his father Vasily from talking everyone’s ear off about how proud he is and why Soviet hockey was the pinnacle of the sport. Alexei spent the rest of his time seated with the Calgary contingent and spending a lot of time sampling various types of alcohol and food trying to expand his palate. At the table it is mostly discussions of the upcoming season and Alexei discussing playing in Carolina for the first time and how that will affect the team and the fanbase. The biggest thing about the evening is that Alexei has discovered his new obsession chicken parms and has smuggled a large bag into the venue and keeps passing them around pushing for me people to try this new delicacy he has discovered. With having nothing like this back in Russia he has become a new disciple of the food trying to proselytize and get others to engage in eating parms. He can’t be stopped and eventually security confiscates the bag of mostly eaten parms due to there being no outside food. Alexei weeps. Fin.

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