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bilbo · 10-27-2019, 09:24 PM

Quote:Ready for grading! 2,288 words

Bilbo Guesses Things About SHLers, Part 2

By: bilbo

Part 1

It’s been more than a week, so now that no one is expecting me to update this on a regular basis, here we go.

A little over two weeks ago, I posted a survey on Discord asking SHLers to fill out a survey that asked them fun questions like “what do enjoy cooking?” and “how do you say “I love you” in your first language?” all with the thought in mind that these questions would help me identify these key things: how old this SHLer is, what country they’re from, and then also how well I think we’d get along in real life based off JUST the answers to these questions, real friendship cast aside.

There are now 30 responses, so to make sure I get through everyone before I get lazier, I’m cutting off responses for now. Stay tuned next time when the Bilbo Needs Season Equipment Fund needs some support.

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PART 2

I am now going to attempt to guess the following: how old these SHLers are, what country they're from, how well I think we'd get along in real life based off just the answers to these questions, and maybe some other things just because.*

*Disclaimer: I’m sorry in advance if any of my guesses and assumptions offend you. This is meant to be kind of a joke and only taken seriously if it turns out I am SO good at guessing (I won’t be).

SHLer #1: @Fantobens
I literally know nothing about you, Fantobens, besides what I’ve just learned from your player page - David Fantobens is on the Tampa Bay Barracuda, you joined SHL last June, and were recruited via r/hockey. Since you made the United States David’s birthplace, I am already thinking you’re from the U.S., but that also means nothing.

Favorite NHL team and why (without saying "I grew up in *insert city*")?

Code:
Rangers why not

HMMM. Very interesting. The Rangers are an Original Six team, so maybe you’re old school and that’s why you like a team I’m indifferent toward? (Sorry not sorry, WiC, if you’re reading this.) I have no preconceived notions about people who like the Rangers, other than maybe they’re from New York. Also, your lack of punctuation with this answer makes me think you may be younger, but younger to what extent? We shall see in the answers below.

What bands or musical artists would you recommend me?

Code:
Tool pantera fitz and the tantrums

Okay, I think I got this. I now think you must be 30-33 years old, because my sister is 30 and she went through a short Tool phase (if I’m being honest with you, Fantobens, I don’t think she really liked them, she was just trying to be cool). I don’t remember what Tool sounds like, but I bet you have a band T-shirt of them or Pantera. Pretty sure this one guy I know likes Pantera still and he’s cool, so you and I could at least talk hockey at a party and nod at each other like him and I do. I think I like Fitz and the Tantrums, and I don’t categorize them with the other two, so that is throwing me off a little on your age for no particular reason.

What TV shows did you grow up watching? If you didn't watch TV, movies or books?

Code:
Simpsons

I said this last times for bluesfan55, I throw Simpsons into either like mid-30s or teens. Either you’re an angsty teen or someone in their late 20s to early 30s who likes the music from their youth enough to recommend it to me. I also just discovered that Tool is still touring, so good for them.

Do you cook? If yes, what's your favorite thing to make? If no, what's your favorite thing to order?

Code:
Yes breakfast

These lack of long answers are killing me, Fantobens. But you were the third person to fill out this survey, so I appreciate you for that. Breakfast isn’t my favorite meal of the day, but food is my favorite, so as long as you understand that eating is important, our friendship can probably survive the rest of this survey. Unfortunately, this tells me nothing about where you live, so I’m still assuming good ole’ USA.

We're already best buds in real life. We've got the night free to do anything. What are we doing?

Code:
Getting baked and jumping in the pool

I’m so sad. That sounds so fun right now if it wasn’t cold outside for me. You’d be fun to hang out with in summer, I think. I wouldn’t even mind Pantera blasting if we had a baked breakfast by the pool. BUT I am afraid of jumping in pools, because I am still slightly afraid of water after failing the diving portion of swimming lessons when I was a wee lad. So I will calmly get into the pool, you can jump. Saying “baked” makes you still seem like the age range I am putting you in, but who is to say, really.

How do you say, "I love you," in your first language?

Code:
Meh

I see. I’m sorry if some people have done you wrong in life, Fantobens, to gain this response. This tells me, and maybe just me, you might not be open to talking about feelings on a regular day basis. If you were to look at my group of close friends, we say “I love you” quite a lot, and I’m sure you show your love in other ways - perhaps by making your friends a hearty breakfast - but if you and I can’t have a heart-to-heart in the pool on our days off, I don’t know how deep this friendship can go.

Rank these social media sites in order of which one you use the most (1 being the most, 5 being the least, 0 being you don't use it): Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, LinkedIn, Tik Tok

Code:
0 0 0 0 0 0

I don’t know if anyone from Generation Z has none of these (even if they don’t use them often), so you’re definitely not a youngling. Discord is in fact my preferred communication method, but I will say, having a Facebook makes it a lot easier for me to invite you to events, so not sure how great our communication would be, especially because your responses are so short. Maybe you are different one-on-one, we don’t know.

Give the image url of a meme you'd send me.
[Image: XKuPWC0.png]

This is cute. I agree with the baseball cap guy on August still being summer, but I’m a big fall fan. Not sure if you chose this meme to make fun of pumpkin spice lattes or because you relate to the handlebar mustache man (I’ve seen this meme, but I still don’t know what this is actually from), but I like to think you’re also a fan of fall, so that’s fun.

SHLer #1 Guessing
Bilbo’s Guesses:
How old is Fantobens? 31
Where is Fantobens from? United States
How well would we get along in real life? Our music tastes are pretty different and I feel like you’re not as into talking about emotions as I am based on your short responses and lack of wanting to type the phrase “I love you,” but like I said, if you’re down to get or make breakfast and go in the pool, that sounds like a fun day to me. Sign me up.

Real Answers
This is the part where I asked Fantobens. My answers have not been altered.
How old is Fantobens? 30s
Where is Fantobens from? United States

Bilbo’s Final Thoughts:
I’m an amazing guesser and heck you to anyone who doubted me.
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SHLer #2: @5ympathies
One of the best decisions I ever made was to listen to 5ympathies and @goldenglutes podcast during work, because now literally any time I see 5ympathies say anything, or apparently even his username, I just start laughing, thinking back to the podcast and the messes you seemingly get yourself into (that I’ve forgotten pretty much, but I still laugh idk).

Favorite NHL team and why (without saying "I grew up in *insert city*")?

Code:
Canucks because I've slipped into insanity

So yeah, this one is a lot easier to guess where you’re from, because I know you live in or near Vancouver. I’m a little biased about the Canucks, because my son, Dom Montgomery, is wearing one of your star player’s faces, but rip you, I guess. If I didn’t know you lived where you do, I’d either think you were from Canada or the UK because it what it be.

What bands or musical artists would you recommend me?

Code:
drake

Sigh. I guess every cool DJ needs to know Drake’s songs, right? Your alter ego DJ, anyway.

What TV shows did you grow up watching? If you didn't watch TV, movies or books?

Code:
spongebob, fairly odd parents

I would think you’re a little older than the age I’m pretty sure you are - 23? - but that’s just because I don’t go around asking people what TV shows they grew up on a lot and I don’t know when the cut off was of people closer to my age watching those two amazing shows.

Do you cook? If yes, what's your favorite thing to make? If no, what's your favorite thing to order?

Code:
sushi

My opinion on you changes here depending on whether you make or just order sushi. If you know how to make it, let’s have a party. But I guess if you know a better sushi place than I do, we could also go there. But tbh, I’m not big into most sushi rolls I’ve met. I’m pretty basic with my sushi.

We're already best buds in real life. We've got the night free to do anything. What are we doing?

Code:
drinking

You’re really painting a beautiful picture of yourself here, 5ym. I appreciate you. I’m a big light weight though, so as long as there’s food and water involved, I could entertain the idea. It would be annoying though if you didn’t get a hangover in the morning but I did.

How do you say, "I love you," in your first language?

Code:
ma tehnu pyaar karda ha

I knew you spoke Punjabi before this, but thanks for flexing your ability to be fluent in two languages ig. And nothing new to see here, 5ym, blame Google tysm. This doesn’t really tell me where you’re from (which is Canada, because I remember some things, or at least you live there now).

Rank these social media sites in order of which one you use the most (1 being the most, 5 being the least, 0 being you don't use it): Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, LinkedIn, Tik Tok

Code:
snapchat, insagram, facebook, twitter, linkedin, tik tok

I’d assume you were a little on the younger 20s side from this answer based on your placement of Snapchat and Facebook mostly. (Having Facebook at #3 indicates you’re most likely out of teen years for me.) And I would be correct in your case, yes.

Give the image url of a meme you'd send me.
[Image: 8zs12ntfpilz.jpg]

This made me chuckle. Do u stay up-to-date with all the iPhones? I do not, but it would tell me something about if you did. Speaking of “XO Tour Llif3,” when YouTube recommended that song for me, I think I listened to it for like four hours on repeat. Since you like Drake, I assume you don’t hate it either. I haven’t listened to it in a while but I am listening to it right now. I didn’t realize the Weeknd was in the music video. Why he here, 5ym? Anyway, this makes me think you’re younger but idk man.

SHLer #2 Guessing
Bilbo’s Guesses:
How old is 5ympathies? 23
Where is 5ympathies from? Canada
How well would we get along in real life? Based off just these answers, I guess if we’re out drinking and listening to mainstream music and eating sushi, that’s a Mood night for me, so as long as I’m prepared to socialize, it would probably be a lot of fun. Plus, we could talk about the Canucks, since they’re a team I know a little more about than let’s say Fantobens’ Rangers above, so that’d be fun to drunk talk about. If we’re inside and drinking, we could watch Fairly Odd Parents, because that’s also what I want to be doing exactly at this moment. If you severely like Drake and drink all the time, I don’t know how best of buds we’d be because I don’t really listen to Drake or drink much, but I’d still be your friend, 5ym. Moving away from just the survey answers, I would be so curious to just watch you be yourself. Ty for always brightening up my days with your online personality.

Real Answers
How old is 5ympathies? 21
Where is 5ympathies from? Canada

Bilbo’s Final Thoughts:
I’m so mad. I think I would have normally guessed that you were younger based off just your answers, but AS WE ALL KNOW, once I have an idea in my head about someone’s age, it’s probably not going to change, regardless of Cold Hard Evidence, like liking Drake and sushi and drinking. Whatever, I’m out of here. Done with myself.

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I have 26 more of these to do, and like I said, I’m not accepting responses at the moment, but thank you for anyone who’s already filled it out/says they’re interested! These are already getting shorter, so that’s a plus. Stay tuned for part 3 and thanks for reading!

*5ympathies* · 10-27-2019, 11:15 PM

Love the energy and however many more of these you do, I’m here for it.

Thanks to JSS for the signature

Grapehead · 10-28-2019, 08:15 AM

The sequel we've all been waiting for

***HoltzFan10*** · 10-28-2019, 08:40 AM

I would love to be an shler on this

***bluesfan55*** · 10-28-2019, 10:48 AM

maaaaaake iiiiiiiit LOOOOOOONGER

ty to @High Stick King @EvilAllBran and @Ragnar for the sigs

bilbo · 10-28-2019, 11:10 AM

10-28-2019, 08:40 AMBoucherFan12 Wrote: I would love to be an shler on this

Thanks for your interest! I'm sure I'll need to do it in the future haha, so stay tuuuned! Cheers

10-28-2019, 10:48 AMbluesfan55 Wrote: maaaaaake iiiiiiiit LOOOOOOONGER

If bloos says, ig I have to do it, right?

Fantobens · 10-28-2019, 03:39 PM

@bilbo I love you

bilbo · 10-28-2019, 04:40 PM

10-28-2019, 03:39 PMFantobens Wrote: @bilbo I love you

**OrbitingDeath** · 10-29-2019, 10:21 AM

You know things about me already, but I wish I noticed this when you asked for it :(

bilbo · 10-29-2019, 03:41 PM

10-29-2019, 10:21 AMOrbitingDeath Wrote: You know things about me already, but I wish I noticed this when you asked for it :(

Yes, sorry! :( It'll come back after I'm caught up!

*Otrebor13* · 10-30-2019, 03:45 PM

Why is this the first I'm seeing of this? I absolutely love this idea and the creativity and uniqueness of it. Great work.

Wonder how accurate you'd be without knowing anything about me Hmm

bilbo · 10-31-2019, 05:41 PM

10-30-2019, 03:45 PMOtrebor13 Wrote: Why is this the first I'm seeing of this? I absolutely love this idea and the creativity and uniqueness of it. Great work.

Wonder how accurate you'd be without knowing anything about me

Tyvm <3

And I guess we'll find out how good I get at this after the first 30 responses!! haha. Stay tuunned and thanks for reading!

TheHockeyist · 11-01-2019, 08:50 AM

@bilbo I'd like to participate in the next one.

bilbo · 11-01-2019, 07:39 PM

11-01-2019, 08:50 AMTheHockeyist Wrote: @bilbo I'd like to participate in the next one.

Awesome! I'll try to crank out the other ones soon so it opens again (my soon is like a month or more lol). Thanks for being interested!

*Leppish* · 11-01-2019, 07:44 PM

I'm in as well.

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