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Michael Scarn Presser
#16

09-15-2020, 09:11 PMbluesfan55 Wrote: Why did you choose to move your agency overseas, agent scarn?
Do you think the SHL All-Star game will need to be saved from that dastardly evil Goldenface?

secret agent michael scarn has been on the run ever since it turned out that he blew up a clone of Goldenface rather than the real Goldenface, as documented in the famed Sundance Film Festival award-winning and Oscar-nominated true documentary "Threat Level Midnight".

scarn has been in hiding for several years, and first began to hide in colorado. while in colorado, he found that his urge to skate became overwhelming and he ended up signing to play for the colorado raptors in the smjhl. after beginning to play well, scarn attracted too much heat and Goldenface sent his associates to colorado to pay him a visit so scarn fled to halifax in canada where he played for a while.

scarn became a canadian citizen during his time there and ended up moving to winnipeg, where he had previously gone on an international business trip while he was employed with dunder mifflin before he became a secret agent. after playing there for a while scarn heard a tip that the real Goldenface was prowling around just south of the border, so scarn made the jump over to buffalo to play hockey there for a while while searching for Goldenface. but then it turned out that he got his map flipped upside down so now scarn has had to make the jump back across the border to Hamilton.

while Goldenface is still out there, there will always be a threat to the people of the world, including the SHL. we can only hope and pray that Goldenface does not try to repeat his despicable plan to blow up the all-star game, this time in the SHL.

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#17

Same question from your contract signing thread

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#18

Also just to go more in depth yes I am pissed and I feel betrayed but I know it's not malicious and I appreciate that you stick to your guns.

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#19

09-15-2020, 10:00 PMNhamlet Wrote: What's something you're hoping to have as a legacy by the time that Scarn's peak has passed? Individual records, team success, maybe starting a movement of UFA activity?

I certainly hope that Scarn will be able to secure a couple more nominations for awards by the time his peak has passed. If that doesn't happen, I'll definitely be disappointed, having earned so much TPE with this player to not get that payoff that I, along with any max earner in this league, hopes for. Winning the cup last season with Buffalo checked off a bucket list item and I'm very glad to have a cup to my name because it takes some pressure off for the rest of my career. That's not to say I'm no longer invested in winning, as I very much hope Hamilton can compete with the best of them this season, but it at least takes some stress out of watching the playoffs, knowing that each passing season means one less season where I'm missing the big one.

The first thing that I heard about the SHL, besides the fact that it was the far bigger, and older league than PBE, was that the free agency system sucked. And so far in the SHL I have somewhat seen that stereotype upheld. More than a handful of teams and users treat testing free agency as a sign of disloyalty and distrust, rather than embracing it as part of the experience of pretending to be a hockey player. I've always made it known to other GMs, pretty much from the start during my pre-draft interviews, that my intent with this player would be to chase some big contract payments. Consider that goal largely accomplished, having secured a salary at or over $6M per season for nearly my entire career thus far. Alongside myself, several other players earned large contract payments, including Piotr Czerkawski, Bo Kane, and Karlstrabe Scholz. Hopefully the stigma against free agency and moving between teams is eroding here in the SHL, and if I can be a part of that larger movement I'd love that to be the case. It's always fun to meet new people rather than corner yourself into one locker room for like over a year irl.

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#20

09-15-2020, 11:59 PMFrick_Nasty Wrote: 1, Why are you so cute?

2. Who would win in a fight @Gwdjohnson or @Hallsy ?

3. How do i get Scarn money?

We keep on teaming up these days, between the DSFL and now SHL, huh? Anyways, Scarn's dashing looks are of course that of a hearty Scranton man, born and raised in the paper industry. There was actually a rumor that Michael Scarn was a J Crew model circulating around the office for a while.

I'm going to base my answer purely based off their profile pictures on Discord because quite honestly I don't know either of them too too well yet. Hallsy is evidently some kind of bird, I can't really tell how large it is but its beak looks really powerful and can be used to poke a hole into almost anything that breathes. The power of flight is also pretty underrated, but I also can't tell if this is a bird that can fly since I can't see any wings in the picture itself, or if it's a dumb bird like a a penguin or ostrich. Meanwhile, Gabe is a gif of an otter which are very fast swimmers and also pretty cute creatures. If the fight is taking place in an aquatic environment, I'm taking the otter no question. Otters eat lots of fish and clams. Also they generally are together in groups. So if the Hallsy bird is fighting the Gabe otter chances are that Gabe has a whole crew of otters behind him, ready to back him up in a fight. Because of this, I have to go with Gabe.

To get Scarn money you gotta hold all the negotiating power. You gotta make those other GMs simp for you. It's tough to get that level of power until you get up there in TPE, but if you're also a good personality around the site who can attract other free agents it could be easier.

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#21

09-14-2020, 03:03 PMTnlAstatine Wrote: Interview how does it feel going to your old teams strict rival after years of service on buffalo.

I don't harbor any hate for Buffalo. The GMs made some overpromises that they couldn't, and didn't, keep, and I didn't want to be in that awkward situation any longer where I couldn't trust the team's management to keep their word with my player specifically. I'm sure they'll keep chugging along, since they're well ran aside from this one incident. I still like a ton of people back in Buffalo, yourself included, and I'm really happy we got a cup at least out of last season, plus a great individual season from yourself.

Going into free agency, my mind was free and I didn't zero in on Hamilton, or any other Eastern Conference team, specifically. But Hamilton, along with Manhattan and Atlanta, all made great offers and it quickly became apparent that I was likely going to stay in-conference at the very minimum. Both Manhattan and Atlanta had given me $8.5M offers with Hamilton at $7.5M, but then they made a sudden jump up to $9.5M and it was all over pretty soon thereafter. Unfortunately, I was never going to limit myself by ruling out all division rivals of Buffalo, and this is where I ended up. Looking forward to competing.

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