The Carolina Kraken Locker Room is, hands down, the coolest place in town full of the coolest, raddest dudes. Everyone supports and looks out for one another, we're all friendly and welcoming when new people arrive. It's the best. I have heard that other locker rooms are very SHL-centric, and more professional. Not here. Probably close to half the messages that get exchanged in the locker room chat channel are just different people saying how sexy everyone is. It's a tropical storm of compliments and support every time I open discord.
When I was going through a tough night at work, borderline mental health crisis, @Jimmysmo27 @GrannyPanPan @natedoeshockey and @sve7en were all immediately calming me down and talking me through it. Where would I be without my team of sexy, supportive studs? I don't know, but somewhere way less cool, and definitely way less fun. In conclusion: Carolina has the best locker room with the coolest dudes and no one will ever convince me otherwise.
The Calgary Dragons locker room is a goddamn throwback to a bygone era, man. Tons of people chatting, sharing music, having a good time. It's really pretty special in the age of Discord to have so much on-site activity, and I absolutely love it. Not a single day goes by without at least a few posts, and there are multiple active threads based on topics. Does it have an app? No. But it's also not at the frenetic and fleeting pace of Discord, so people around the world [and we have a very international team] can participate in the conversation without feeling alienated. So whether it's our Latvian contingent talking about Zemgus Girgensons, old man Slappy drooling over Salma Hayek, or Esa pontificating on his love of Parm, the Dragons locker room feels like a time capsule from when this league was at its most fun.
The Carolina Kraken Locker Room is, hands down, the coolest place in town full of the coolest, raddest dudes. Everyone supports and looks out for one another, we're all friendly and welcoming when new people arrive. It's the best. I have heard that other locker rooms are very SHL-centric, and more professional. Not here. Probably close to half the messages that get exchanged in the locker room chat channel are just different people saying how sexy everyone is. It's a tropical storm of compliments and support every time I open discord.
When I was going through a tough night at work, borderline mental health crisis, @Jimmysmo27 @GrannyPanPan @natedoeshockey and @sve7en were all immediately calming me down and talking me through it. Where would I be without my team of sexy, supportive studs? I don't know, but somewhere way less cool, and definitely way less fun. In conclusion: Carolina has the best locker room with the coolest dudes and no one will ever convince me otherwise.
Also, I can speak to this. Carolina, for my brief time there, was excellent. Cheers to the folks in charge for making it happen.
I was very excited to be tasked with the important job of redesigning our San Francisco Pride locker room. First step was to remove the washroom entirely and install high tech colostomy bags on all players on the team. These bags include technology which actually convert waste product into a liquid form of nutrition, while burning off the remainder as an odourless gas. Not only did this give our Pride mating partners more energy during games, but it freed up space in the lockerroom. With the extra space I decided to install a small laboratory. This laboratory would be used for giving DNA samples after each practice or game that the team played, and with which I could gain extremely helpful data for designing even better stimplants for the future. I have struggled to come up with the perfect stimplant design at this point which has led to some very ... annoying ... side effects, which many of my mating partners do not appreciate.
I also would install a picture of Tom Cruise since he is an alien.
Signature courtesy of sulovilen. May his name be exalted in Sardangian lore.
The locker room here in Minnesota has a nice, laid back environment. We're a group with a solid mix of young and veteran players, and it has really worked out well so far. Every day, we come in the locker room and actively participate in helping each other get better and better. We work together during fitness training, we work together during on-ice drills and even adjust those drills to help players work on specific skills.
There are no serious egos on the team. We all want team success first and foremost, but we're not shy for a little bit of friendly competition. Each line wants to out produce the others and carry the team to victory. The younger players want to show the veterans that they are ready to take the reins, but the veterans want to show the young ones that they've still got it. It's a great mix of personalities in the locker room and it has worked out so far, as we finally brought Minnesota back to the playoffs and improving every day.
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Guy Incognito - D - #24
Texas Renegades Season 76
0-0-0
Regular Season - [G 0] [A 0] [Pts 0] [+/- 0] [PIM 0] [Hits 0] [SB 0]
Well I am going to talk about my junior locker room, aka the most toxic locker room in the league according to the site, any guesses? Did I hear someone say Anchorage from the back? Anchorage is probably the best locker room I have been in, and it is partially due to how many people from different organizations and backgrounds share the discord. When I first joined Anchorage it was under the dictatorship of Ass. Ass ran a very tight ship, things were running smooth and no one was to talk out line, or they would be punished. Shortly after that the reigns were transition over to the worst person, Gabe (fire him) - luckily this timeline included MVP GM bear. However, with Gabe at the top the toxic environment got worse by the day. People were posting gnome dabs, screenshots were being leaked - it was truly the darkest timeline. Luckily for Anchorage, a new GM tandem will be taking over the team shortly.
A Maine Timber locker room revamp is a great opportunity for star Centre Jay Cue to put things more to his taste. Not that he complains a lot about not having an Olympic swimming pool or a casino inside the Timber facilities, but still, if we are doing some construction work, why not improve them FOR REAL?
First, Cue needs his own space, so right beside the common locker room, the team will need to save some space for his quiet place. And what does that space have? First, red led lights. You see where i am going with this? Flashing lights, that follow the music playing on the massive speakers he will install there. In every wall around the room, we will have mirrors, floor to ceiling. Are you getting it now? No? The "pièce de resistance" is the pole, right in the middle of the room. Yeah, it is a strip club. Cue needs his strip club before training and/or games. It is either that or a casino, but the casino licenses are harder to get. So he will settle for a strip joint.
09-06-2021, 09:01 PM(This post was last modified: 09-06-2021, 09:01 PM by zeagle1.)
Well the only uncontrolable shitting going on in the league is what BAP is doing to everyone else on the ice! gnomedab! In light of this, the new BAP locker room would have gold plated toilets in it. In addition, being one of the best teams in the league can be exhausting, so each locker will actually be a door into a private room containing a nap pod and a massage chair. These tools will be a boon to BAP's success this season. The nap pods will allow the players to take a quick nap between periods, and they can sleep at the stadium if they really need to. The massage chairs will actually save the team money, as they no longer need to employ team doctors or PTs, the massage chairs will prevent all injuries and massage the players back to fitness after each practice session and game! Mew Two would've liked a moonbounce in the LR but apparently it wouldn't fit, sadly.
I've gradually decreased the number of sim league LRs I'm in over the last several months due to starting medical residency, but I'm beyond pleased to have kept the Buffalo Stampede LR listed over time. It's a bit frustrating to know that the league views Buffalo as a team relatively negatively for whatever reason - but as a group they're funny, generally well-intentioned, and ridiculously active. It's a lot of what makes the league palatable for me - no one in the LR, on the team or otherwise, is safe from ridicule in the same way that nobody is shielded from praise if it's well-deserved. I get fantasy tips and build recommendations in separate channels from people who follow FHM (or the league in general) much more closely than I do, and we're even able to engage in talks about politics in the appropriate channel as time goes on. In the very limited time I'm able to spend on sim leagues, I do genuinely enjoy chatting about the U.S., users' evolving love lives, or joking about asking WBF/Tomen to trade me along with like ten other users on the team (at the same time).
As a player of Quebec we got a unique dressing room are oldest player Kappa Kappa is on his last season with team too pursue his ice fishing dream over in norway he has some cool converstions with kayden about his hobby. And we got Shane Duffy jr as other older player he his big Irish folk good talented hockey player good for the young forwards. Big Boss from Russia we know hes a Big Boss back home but pursueing his life long goal of ice hockey. Weird Al what a guy funnest guy in whole locker room bonds the team closer together. Ryan Gardner big goon but keeping on his better side and keeping up with his points instead, are captain Cooper what a year baby going for it all the boys going with awards and the teams 100% supporting him in accoplishing that. These are some of the older players that been keeping this team together.
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Gaia Mormont IIHF Federation Head
S18, S34, S38 Challenge Cup Champion
09-06-2021, 11:40 PM(This post was last modified: 09-06-2021, 11:41 PM by Gaia Mormont.)
Task Uno
So my brilliant redesign plans for the locker room were thwarted because someone else got to them managers first and the go ahead was given before I could unveil the greatest locker room plans the entire universe has ever seen. And yes, that is assuming there is life beyond our galaxy. I wandered into Fluw and Geek's office only to realize the entire locker room had been turned into a forest. Like, dirt floors and leaves and trees. Logs. Squirrels. The shower had been modified to turn into a waterfall and a stream now ran through where the benches used to be. Salmon were flopping and leaping everywhere. I suddenly knew who had gotten to the design plans first. Tumovs. If I hadn't been so surprised it actually might have been rather gorgeous.
So now we, like most bears, are resorted to shitting in the forest. I guess that's what we get for having a diet rich in salmon. I'm gonna take my budget and buy a a private island. I don't think the Bosses will mind too much.
09-07-2021, 12:12 AM(This post was last modified: 09-07-2021, 12:13 AM by Kyamprac.)
Prompt 2
The Winnipeg locker room has always been a little quiet, but seems to be even more-so lately compared to when I first joined the team. There is still a great bunch of people in there, but as management takes us into full re-build mode and some of the team's bigger personalities go elsewhere, I admit it can be challenging to get and stay invested in the chat. Folks are a little down that we've lost the guys that we have, but that's the nature of it all I guess. I just hope we can turn all the draft picks we've gotten of late into amazing players who are ready and willing to bring a great locker room presence to the team and revitalize things a bit.
In the meantime, we just do what we can. Shortly before we learned scruff was traded, we got into a fun conversation about our "to read" lists and started a small team book club. Although scruff has gone to NOLA now, he started reading the first book we picked (Dune) and says he'll still pop in from time to time to chat about it which will be nice as we wait for the fresh blood to come in.
Prompt One: If we're gonna talk about the Edmonton Blizzard locker rooms, I think that first we gotta start with the opposing locker room. Bordering on very possible illegality, the away team locker room will have a literal blizzard happening inside it when the away team is present. Dangerously cold temperatures and winds constantly running in there so that it's barely accessible by the opposing side, and as such throws them off before game time. Good luck trying to use the bathrooms in that climate! The only room that is safe to access would be the shower room, however the showers would only dispense ice cold water, and be equally inconvenient as a result. As for our locker room, it would obviously be appropriately heated and extremely cozy inside. It has a constant pleasant scent around it, and the showers and bathrooms would be very much useable and convenient for our players. The league would almost definitely reject this proposed locker room revamp but this would be ideal for giving us a home advantage
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Muerto Registered
S15, S16, S24, S34, S38 Challenge Cup Champion
The Great Falls Grizzlies Locker Room has so far been turning into an interesting place! As an expansion team, every single person is there for the first time - there are no alumni, no long time players - we are essentially all rookies. There is definitely some familiarity with many of the players selected through expansion or trades prior to the Draft - Great Falls selected or traded for 5 players who all played together on the Anaheim Outlaws for the past seasons, so there is that Bad Posse contingent. There's another group of three players who are all prospects for the Calgary Dragons, so that lends itself to a natural bond. In the draft we picked up a super active rookie goaltender who so far is the life of the locker room but also very competitive and wans to do well. When he gets mad we feel bad for him but secretly we kind of wonder when we should tell him that goalie TPE and attributes don't matter! We have also drafted or picked up in free agency a number of players whose users are well known from either the past or current era of SHL. Things are settling down in terms of who will be on the roster as we move into middle frame of the season, but so far everyone is keeping it pretty light and keep working to get better individually and as a team. When we aren't playing on the ice we are either playing hide and seek with Arturs' salmon, or watching some of the rookies play their video games. Overall, the first season of the Great Falls Grizzlies has brought in a good mix of veteran leadership but also strong young developing players who will form the strength of the team going forward!
PROMPT 1- With a very large chunk of the league now shitting uncontrollably every quarter hour, the plumbing in your LRs has gone down the drain (pun intended). The owner has decided to revamp the whole LR, the locker rooms in your arena will be totally demolished and reconstructed. He has tasked you with designing them because he has better things to do (eat grape jelly bean).
Written Task: Describe how you design your LR and what amenities you include for you and your teammates. Quality of life improvements, crazy bougie shit, or just a normal looking LR, the choice is yours. Definitely need new bathrooms though. You also get to design the opponent LR, do you make it nice, bland, or include death traps to try and throw them off their game? Your budget is... let's say $400 million. I like that number. (150+ words)
I like decorating and designing new looks. As a free agent, I have time to think about the small details. You can perhaps guess how surprised I was when I got the call. Certain SHL team wants to hire me to be part of a designing team that designs their new locker room! Right away few ideas popped into my mind. I want the whole room to be white. All the walls, floors, benches - everything. I have seen such rooms online, and I must say - really nice. I think a similar concept works in a locker room. Think about the extra light you get when everything is white.
Another idea that popped into my mind right away is to put showers and bathrooms all in the same room. No walls or anything. Just showers and toilet seats. That might sound extreme to some, but the open design is what most people want in their kitchens, living rooms, etc. Why not take it one step further and do the same in showers and bathrooms? Exactly.
I don't want to give out too much away, but the early talks have been positive. They did not like the fact that everything is white, but open design in showers and bathrooms was seen as a smart idea.
Benpachi![[Image: banes.png]](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/653372971460853786/1187765726476505189/banes.png)
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Muerto![[Image: draft-aa.png?ex=6623d02e&is=66115b2e&hm=...6f7f7fe7e&]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/748193758763548763/1226175777284952185/draft-aa.png?ex=6623d02e&is=66115b2e&hm=ee818b541f551f18b56215d0ecacc06ecd418956774715b00ddb8a36f7f7fe7e&)
S76 SMJHL DRAFT 3RD OVERALL PICK 
IIHF TEAM NORWAY 
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