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S77 PT #2: Bigger, Better, Faster, Stronger
Due: Sunday, June 23rd @ 11:59 PM PST
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enigmaticTrading Card Team currently with big titles
This new SHL steroids player enhancement program is entirely based on luck. You can't decide what ability you're gonna get. You can get something cool like super strength or super speed but you can also get lame stuff like being able to smell whenever someone ate french fries in the last 30 minutes. With my luck, I would get such a crappy power that would not help me in any way. You'd get the hulk and quicksilver playing around me and I'd get something like Big Bertha's powers. I'm pretty sure with these abilities I'd actually get TPE removed from my build. Anyway, I have to disagree with SHL execs that this would make the league more entertaining because it would suck having someone much faster than anyone else for example. You wouldn't be able to even follow them and their team would win 420-0 every game.
![[Image: Oqsvuu4.png]](https://i.imgur.com/Oqsvuu4.png)    
BaronRegistered Member
gurbsBank Manager Posting Freak
1: Tony Soprano's transformation into the SHL’s next big thing is like something straight out of a movie. First, he gets injected with a serum that turns him from a regular hockey player into a superhuman powerhouse. Think Captain America, but on ice. Then, he goes through some crazy training with top-notch coaches and former NHL legends, making him a beast in every aspect of the game. With genetic tweaks, Tony's stamina gets turbocharged, so he's skating circles around everyone else, even in the third period. He’s rocking some high-tech gear that makes him even more unstoppable. Picture him delivering bone-crushing checks, zipping around the ice with lightning speed, and reacting to plays like he’s got a sixth sense. On top of all that, his brain gets a boost too. He can read the game like a book and make passes so precise it’s like he’s got a hockey GPS. With a peak TPE being infinite, Tony is basically a hockey superhero, turning every game into a highlight reel and making fans go wild. The SHL better watch out because Tony Soprano is here to dominate and entertain like never before
![[Image: gurbs.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/gurbs.gif) SHL Career Stats / Achievements S67 PHI | 66GP | 23G | 32A | 55P | +11 | 163sog | 14.11sh% | 1 ppp | 63 hit | 44 blk | 12 pim
S68 PHI | 66GP | 7 G | 29A | 36P | +12 | 113sog | 6.19 sh% | 0 ppp | 141hit | 26 blk | 20 pim
S69 PHI | 48GP | 3 G | 27A | 30P | +9 | 53 sog | 5.66 sh% | 0 ppp | 91 hit | 21 blk | 14 pim
Career Totals | 1040GP | 258G | 476A | 734P | 2507sog | 10.29sh% | 100pp | 1082hit | 673blk S63 PHI | 6 GP | 5 G | 1 A | 6 P | 0 | 19 sog | 26.32sh% | 0 ppp | 6 hit | 11 blk
[align=center]S64 PHI | 4 GP | 0 G | 2 A | 2 P | -2 | 2 sog | 0.00 sh% | 0 ppp | 6 hit | 2 blk S65 PHI | 7 GP | 3 G | 4 A | 7 P | +2 | 19 sog | 15.79sh% | 0 ppp | 11 hit | 3 blk S66 PHI | 7 GP | 1 G | 3 A | 4 P | -2 | 12 sog | 8.33 sh% | 0 ppp | 8 hit | 5 blk
CybershadeEDMRegistered Senior Member
Written Option 1
Bishop Van Apeldoorn goes to take the procedure after being curious on how it will impact him. After a few hours, the process is complete. He can feel rocks in his body. When he closes his eyes, his entire body turns into stone. With his new powers, he finds it much easier to block shots and stop rebounds. However, this power limits his agility and speed but he is no longer required to wear the extra weight of his gloves and blockers due to his new tough exterior. He can now use his bare hands to block and snatch pucks out of the air while feeling as little as a light sting. His new strength allows him to slap the puck down the ice at an incredible speed which can help send his teammates on breakaways or score into the empty net himself. Although his new powers massively improve his play, he knows that he shouldn't abuse them. (158)
kareyRegistered Fun Guy.
JustAnotherHockeyFanSimmer ask me about my love for steamed hotdogs
CrazytomatoSHL GM SHL GM
When playing against more offensively skilled players crazy Tomato II plays alot more physical but without risking break aways, as a defender his whole job is to get the puck away from the player, he also has to work with his teammates because you don't want to go for a hit and miss then let him be on a breakaway, when your playing a more physically skilled player you just have to be ready at all times especially if your defending him, some of the ways Crazy Tomato II would defend these physical players would be staying near the boards,passing alot, if Crazy Tomato II was attacking vs a physical player he would pass the puck around, the player can't be everywhere at once. And if there was a player that was skilled in both ways you'd just play really cautious around them at all times especially in the neutral zone
![[Image: 9x1vcNx.png]](https://i.imgur.com/9x1vcNx.png)
goldenglutesSHL GM binko
written prompt the second one
so binko of the koivus which consist of his family matches up quite well against the other players one on one but i would like to talk about his match up with a very specific player on another team which is the atlanta inferno. that specific player is a former team mate of binko's and it is none other than mr pee himself @hotdog well binko matches up quite well against mr eel but it is likely not because of the reasons that you are thinking about! now you may want to ask what the reasons are and you would be totally justified in wanting to ask those sorts of questions so i will indulge you and answer that specific question. so binko matches up well against the eel because he absolutely loves mr eel's slime. binko has practically played his entire career all gooped up in mr pee's slime because pee tends to enjoy slithering into the sleeves of his teammates and binko thrives in that high goop environment. so whenever binko plays the eel he will try to hit and check him as much as possible just so he can get some of that sweet slime rubbed off on him to make binko feel right at home. is binko the only one who enjoys the slime? @micool132 @Jepox ![[Image: glutes2.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/glutes2.gif) Signatures by Vulfzilla, Jepox, Jess, rum_ham, Ragnar, and myself ![[Image: 9vAsr7c.png]](https://i.imgur.com/9vAsr7c.png) ![[Image: tkMQzhf.png]](https://i.imgur.com/tkMQzhf.png) ![[Image: tdKmZA0.png]](https://i.imgur.com/tdKmZA0.png)
jj2416Registered Member
HalkoholRegistered Posting Freak Code: Written Option 1: Your player has been chosen to undergo a player enhancement program à la Captain America in order to create the next super SHL player to make the league more entertaining for fans.I think that in fact this super enhancement program is not genetic engineer in universe but actually reality hacking. Or as we would understand it, someone fiddling with the database of the players. As such, I imagine myself doing several rule breaks to justify this but somehow it gets through HO, owners and everything and is accepted. What I do? Well, I decide to set a completely new (and very unrealistic) record for my player. I decide to give Niclas Sundqvist a TPE of 3000. This would not only make him completely unbeatable as well as strongly regression immune but also be the first player in SHL history to reach the insane amount of 3000 TPE. As for superhuman abilities, I do not think there are any (except him being pure bullshit overpowered in the sim). In some sense of it all, if we see it in SHL universe, the superpower would be how long he would be able to stay at the absolute top in terms of player ability. [170 words] ![[Image: kO5aAZV.png]](https://i.imgur.com/kO5aAZV.png) ![[Image: 8NuVFvj.png]](https://i.imgur.com/8NuVFvj.png)
AceSHL GM Chief Chicken Officer
Written Option 2 - If a player outmatches Pohler Beargeron, it will not be done physically. You simply cannot outmuscle a fully grown adult male polar bear, unless the opposing player is a larger animal. I doubt that to be possible though. What is much more possible, is the other player outsmarting Pohler Beargeron. When that occurs on the ice, Beargeron enrages, and tries to throw paws with the closest opposing player. Knights coaches are working with Beargeron on getting him to tone down his aggression, but it’s hard to teach an old bear new tricks. Beargeron continues to work on his emotional awareness, and identifying when he’s about to lose his cool so he can chant “Goosefraba” in Polar Bear. Repeating this phrase brings him back down to zen, and allows him to play hockey at a high level. He still probably will not be as cerebral as the smartest humans out there, but they won’t be as strong as he is.
 ![[Image: 1n0REYx.png]](https://i.imgur.com/1n0REYx.png) RIP Dangel. See you on the other side, brother
AephinoSMJHL GM "king" of the SHL
One day Zedward is walking down the streets of Hamilton when suddenly 4 black SUVs pull up next to him. A group of men step out of one of the cars and ask "Are you Zedward Zilliams?" Before Zedward even has time to answer, two men are grabbing Zedward and blindfolding him. Suddenly, one man rips off Zedward's mustache. He is kicking and screaming but it's too late. He feels a sharp hit to the head.
Two hours later Zedward wakes up, foggy, as two doctors are inserting giant needles full of purple and blue liquids into his arms and legs. Zedward feels an extreme amount of warmth and pain and is knocked out again. Two days later Zedward wakes up again. This time something feels... different. More powerful. Zedward looks around and there's no one in the room. Zedward stands up, feeling slightly woozy, but definitely feeling an undeniable surge of strength in his body like never before. He flexes his muscles, trying to understand the new abilities he has gained. Then Zedward gaps. He slowly reaches his right arm up to his face. "no tape..." he thinks to himself. Zedward frantically looks around and finds a mirror. Zedward finally has his own giant mustache. ![[Image: 5yBVV1C.jpeg]](https://i.imgur.com/5yBVV1C.jpeg)
NikeSHL GM S22, S28, S40, S42 Challenge Cup Champion & Merica Lover
There’s something special about being chosen for the superhockey treatment. In fact, I never would have expected a call from the league as they were looking to implement a new super player on each team to see how it would improve ratings, but here we are. As I walk through the doorway of the research facility, I am impressed to find an entirely sterile looking office with bright white lighting. The aesthetic is super futuristic but also brings with it a sense of discomfort. As I make my way to the office, I am called immediately into exam room 4 by an overhead speaker voice that certainly feels like it doesn’t belong to a human being. I step into exam room 4, where I am met by a young male nurse. He simply slides up my shirt sleeve, gives me a quick and painless chip injection and seconds later I am on my way out the door. With this mew chip, I am purportedly going to have a +1000 TPE leg up on other players in my draft class. We’ll see what the real cost of this experiment is in just a season or two…
![[Image: ho-lee-smokes-iihf.png]](https://i.ibb.co/vjFwF57/ho-lee-smokes-iihf.png) Thanks Jove for my sig
trellaRegistered ambacas
With rival leagues popping up all over the world, the SHL commissioner Wannabefinn decided the league needed to start a superplayer program in order to make sure the SHL stays ahead and is never surpassed by another sim league. Behind the scenes, he had developers like Drunkenteddy, Caltroit red flames, and esilverm work on creating a way to juice up players and give them superhuman abilities, so that the SHL’s product will be so much more exciting and explosive than any other league. While the technology for a super soldier machine did not yet exist, the developers saw an opportunity to harness some latent power within the league. Ever since the closing of the thunderdome, all of the energy within that section of the forum has laid dormant, ready to be harnessed for another use. By beaming the best thunderdome threads directly into the cells of a player, the developers discovered that this would charge a player with immense strength and power. Of course, RIP THUNDERDOME 2013-2023 would be the first subject for Project TD. The experiment was a success and RIP TD became the first super player. Many more are to come.
st4rfaceRegistered Posting Freak
WRITTEN OPTION 2
Hockey has actually a lot of mind games. I think that it's more important to be a step ahead of you opponent IQ wise than faster, stronger or better in any other physical aspect. Aumy Junior II is an alive example of it. He has a good accuracy, but his strengths ends almost there. However, he is a survivor who is fighting for each inch of the ice. Exactly this mentality is his key to the success. There are many players who are better in SHL, but he can keep up with them just because of the work he is putting in. Sometimes you have to want something much more than others. Hard work will help it to actuallt make it done. That has been his moto since junior season in SMJHL. Everything is possible if you play like a dog or like the rent is due. Keep that in your mind forever and you will see the results for sure! 161 words  |
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