Of course Shadow Fenix accepts the chance to commentate a sport he knows nothing about. If he’s being offered a large sum of money, he would be willing to do anything because if there’s anything more important than constructing additional pylons, it’s acquiring more minerals (read: money). He would probably tap into the Xel’Naga to acquire ancient knowledge about the sport, and hopefully that would allow him to commentate at least at a competent level. I think from there, his silky echoey protoss voice, combined with his experience channeling his fellow Protoss forces to glory, he would be able to get the job done. He might even ask to bring on some guest stars of his own, either fellow Protoss, or maybe even some of his teammates from the Argos. If there’s anything more fun about watching a cast where the commentator doesn’t know anything, it’s watching a cast where the commentator is with his friends.
Written Option 2:
Juan absolutely accepts the gig.He spent 4 years in Quebec being a third wheel translator for Leo Roze and Celeste Desjardins, there is no way this is harder than that. Juan would put zero effort into preparing for the gig and instead wing it. Obviously there would be a few awkward momebts but he would just use the english is my second language excuse to get through those. The rest he would just use typical sport speak like " They just dont have the heart tonight" and " Player X is very underrated/overrated in the league " type phrases. Mix those with some jokes and thats juan easy pay day. Obviously Juan would also take time to promote all of Winnipegs star prospects that are join the club this offseason and plug all the charities he supports as well. He would end the broadcast by chirping the shit out of the Kelowna Knights GM as that guy is a total bum and needs to be roasted publically more.
Otrebor13 Graphic Graders
S11 Challenge Cup Champion
Posts:5,350 Threads: 184 Joined: Dec 2011 Reputation:54
Pronouns: Male
Player: Axel Kirby
Axel is normally a pretty reserved guy and doesn’t put himself in the spotlight very often. That being said, he does have a good understanding of the sport and he does enjoy analyzing and the film portion of the sport to get better, so he would definitely feel comfortable. I think he’s going to be a little light hearted, make some jokes and try to keep things light while also providing good insight.
When it comes to the playoffs, I am writing this after the first round has ended so we know the outcome. Assuming it’s before the first round, Axel would definitely say that Los Angeles going up against Calgary is probably the worst first round matchup they could have received. Calgary is a solid team that for whatever reason always has LA’s number. They struggle to play against them, and it’s something that needs to be looked out for. If they want to win the series they’re going to have to play hard and put constant pressure because Calgary will make them pay for mistakes. Los Angeles also has to overcome the mental hurdle of losing to Calgary during the season, and start a brand new season in the series.
When I got the call to guest star as a commentator, of course I said yes. Me? pass up a fat paycheck? in this economy? what the hell are you talking about. I didn’t know a single thing about the sport, but come on—it’s me, Grindle. I could make reading a grocery list entertaining. I had 12 hours to prep, so I watched a few highlight reels, picked up some buzzwords, and decided that was more than enough. Why stress when you have as much charisma as me?
When I hit the booth, I owned it. Sure, I might have butchered a term or two, but not only were those terms stupid, I still turned those into gold with my charm and quick wit. Fans loved me, the league loved me, and honestly, I probably outshone the players on the field. By the end, they weren’t talking about the game—they were talking about Grindle’s commentary. I’m basically a natural at everything I do.
The Anchorage Armada are now in the semi final rounds and getting ready to square off against the top seeded Quebec City Citadells. One of the hottest players on the ice in these playoffs for the Armada, Zeus Storm, was asked to comment on the upcoming match up with Quebec City and how they can win the series. Zeus was quoted as to saying that Anchorage needs to play fast and confident without hesitation on the ice. The stakes are high but if they play like the stake are high it will cause them to overthink and not want to make a mistake. If they can play as natural as possible and believe in their abilities they can without a doubt take the series from Quebec City. Zeus has been playing fast and loose all playoffs and is second on the team in scoring only trailing his line mate Hughes Incorporated. As long as the top line can continue to put up heavy offensive numbers and the secondary lines play complimentary hockey then Anchorage will have a chance to move onto the finals.
Oh wow, what an absolutely wonderful honor this is to be invited to watch...sports ball! Sincerely, he wouldn't panic at all. Cadmael is one of those dudes who can't stop smiling even when everything is going to absolute hell all around him. So basically he would just wing it completely on the day of. He would do his best to certainly not try to disrespect the sport, whatever it was, by making a joke that would come off in bad taste, so he'll certainly do maybe a little research beforehand to make sure he misses accidentally referencing any scandals that might kill the vibe. After that though, he's just gonna be the gooft color commentator that just completely overexplains everything that's going on in the game. Stuff like: "Oh wow! The man takes the long stick and hits the rubber black disc into the basket!" Using hockey as an example.
Alexi Piastri is a fan of all types of different racing. His father was heavily involved with the Ferrari formula one team after all, but this is now what he expected when his agent told him that he got him his commentating at the races.. Piastri will be the special guest track announcer for a day at the Del Mar Fairgrounds calling the horse races. Although Piastri has never as much as attended a day at the horse track, let alone been involved with horse racing in anyway, this really shouldn't end up being too big of a deal. Racing is pretty self explanatory, go fast and turn left may never have been a more fitting slogan than when it's used for horse racing. While Piastri assumed this would be indycar, formula one, imsa, or even nascar, a day at the horse races should end up being a blast and Piastri is going to make the best of it.
Anthique SHL GM
Quebecer trying to make goalie TPE matter in Texas
We are currently in the Conference Final, and our opponent is a well know team that made it far in the last couple of season like us. The San Francisco Pride are a good team that was also in the top 3 like us this season. So we know it's gonna be a hard battle and we gonna have to give our best every game. MY player so far is having a great playoffs performance so far. He's 3rd in GAA, 4th in GSAA and also 4th in Save%. Only played 9 games while having a shutout, but it's way better than what I did during the regular season. Not that hard to beat you would say? Yeah I know, I was not proud of my performance during the season, but the playoffs is habitually where I stand out the most, so it's fun to see that I'm in my element. Goalies are strange, but I love being in the front of a camera and talk to people about our team. As a veteran of the team and the starting goalie since my first year in the league, I know a lot about the league and our team, I'm more mature than some of my teammates and I put enough pressure on myself during games that doing a interview like this is nothing compare to it.
P1: Tony Soprano steps onto the analyst desk with confidence and charisma, quickly winning over the room with his sharp wit and easygoing demeanor. Dressed sharply and exuding the swagger of a seasoned pro, he kicks things off with a few jokes, quipping about how the team needs to win this series or "the gabagool just won’t taste as sweet." Once the cameras roll, Tony dives into the upcoming playoff matchup with a mix of humor and expert analysis. He emphasizes the importance of discipline and execution, noting that while the opponent is fast, they play a loose game that leaves them vulnerable to turnovers. Tony highlights his team’s strong power play and explains how they’ve worked to exploit weaknesses in the opposing penalty kill. Confident yet grounded, he sums it up with, “If we stick to our game, play smart, and keep our composure, we’re walking out of this series.”
I feel like Dunkler could make due commentating on another league with no prior knowledge so long as he sticks to those god awful nothing sandwich player post game interview quotes they always give. You know the ones Im talking about, but maybe coaches are guilty of it as well.
“They gotta be able to execute, there’s no excuses out there if we don’t do our jobs.”
I think that same logic can be dropped into any sport. Darts? Handball? Bike Polo? You just gotta execute dummy!
If Dunkler has time to study though, it wouldn’t hurt. Find a couple players on each team that he can go into their background on. Everyone loves to hear about where they learned the game or what famous person they road the bus with in high school. If this network can rely on Dunkler for a couple of those nuggets, Im sure he would fit right in.
If he wanted to be a real asshole, Dunkler could just one-up and devil’s advocate everything the other panelists say. This strategy would likely not earn him a return invite though.
Of course I would do it! Opportunity of a lifetime!
If the pay is good, it's worth the risk. But doing the play by play of a sport I don't know at all is a risky move. So I will study at least the rulebook of the sport to know at least what the players can/should do and what they cannot.
I don't have to learn the players names, will go with their jersey numbers or will find a way to describe the player without "cancelling" myself. Some sports have a list of the players names with their jersey numbers so that will help and by the time the game will be over, I will surely have remembered them.
Twelve hours is not a lot, but during the flight I will be able to watch some highlights of yesterday games to get a feel of what the sport look like.
Will try to not make a fool of myself, but should be a cool experience!
2: Zedward was unexpectedly invited to be the color commentator for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, despite knowing nothing about American football. Doubly unfortunately, Zedward wasn't even told which football it was. So Zedward decided to do zero research, and just purely be a commentator to offer notes or criticisms about the MLS, as well as good old fashioned banter with his main commentator he was assigned to. So when Zedward showed up, he tried to cancel. But the execs said he had no choice, he had already signed up. Plus they secretly wanted to watch Zedward crash and burn.
In the end, it was in fact pretty brutal. Zedward knew none of the players or coaches or positions so it was really difficult for him to chime in. And when he did, it was often incorrect information. Secondly, he couldn't even really offer any color commentary, and the banter with his American co-host fell flat, as they often took his dry humor for hostility.
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Allegiant Historian
S3, S28, S36, S38, S41, S43, S47 Challenge Cup Champion
At some point throughout the season, Weston was invited to do play-by-play for a local basketball team as Atlantic Canada tries to re-establish itself as being able to handle a solid C or D-tier basketball league. In the process of this, he managed to make a bit of a fool out of himself. Sure, he knows the basics: what a two-pointer, a three-pointer, and what it means to 'block' something, but other than that, he knew nothing.
He spent about half an hour playing a basketball game before hopping on the air. Boom goes the dynamite? Well, not quite. But, he did refer to screens as 'body checks', lay ups as 'soft dunks', and alley-oops as 'hey, isn't that cheating?' On top of that, when the rules of 'traveling' were explained to him, he went on to assume that nearly every other play was traveling. That wound up going viral, as some basketball fans found it a breath of relief -- given professional players get unusual leeway with that.
Other people just found it annoying.
By the time he went off the air, he was complaining about players throwing off their aim by jumping during shots, and claiming slam dunks seemed like 'showboating.' Needless to say, he was not invited back.
Nathangus McExplosion of tha atlanta inferno ice hockey team, in the simulation hockey league, is invited to Le Réseau des Sports to talk about their future playoff matchup in the round three of the playoffs versus the Philadelphia Forge.
Hello everyone, it is I, Nathangus, and I will tell you what is our key to success against Philadelhpia. The forge has been a juggernaut of the division for the last decade and the inferno has stuggle their fair share against them in the regular season but also over the last few playoffs. However, the FOrge is not invincible. The key to win will be to ride the red hot stun gun and his goalie performances the best we can. He has shut down our former opponents and gives us the degree of confidence to play a very intense style of hockey. The team will also need big performances from Jae-Ik Barron, Bongo, Billy Herrington, Jiggl. e Puff and Phillipe Eko Eel. These guys gotta carry the youth and lead the way into an intense game. Finally, I think we need surprise heroes everygame, be it myself, or my other young fellows such as the Lavoies and Violet or Seppannen and johnston. With everything lining up, we could cause a surprise and go to the ultimate serie for the first time since we won the only cup in frnachise history.
Written Option 1: "I honestly never expected us to do this well right off the bat," Gwendolyn said in response to the analyst's question. She had been brought on for an interview about Edmonton's performance throughout the season. "We're rebuilding, we're rookies. No one expected us to do well. Granted... if a couple more things went our way we probably could have maybe made the playoffs... but I'm really happy with our team's performance. I should specify I'm really happy with Alexa and Ólafur's performance. Alexa breaking the record for rookie scoring was a moment we were all delighted to share and Olafur almost reaching 80 points was honestly something that made me hopeful for Edmonton's future. I hope the fans out there are as well. I know I haven't done as well as they have, but mark my words. These next few seasons, with friendly competition like this, I won't be outdone."
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