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S51 Championship Week
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ZachRegistered Senior Member Code: 1. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)Since Anthony Archer went to Edmonton for his VIP trip in last year's playoffs, this time he's decided to change it up and go see the playoffs from Hamilton's perspective. Anthony really enjoys seeing the stadium environments the playoffs and championship games can bring from various team's perspectives. This past season in his rookie year he was fortunate enough to make the playoffs in Tampa Bay and that was thrilling. Archer takes an uber to all of his destinations throughout his stay. His destinations range from the local theater to watch an expensive play to dining at some of the finest steak houses the city has to offer. And of course, he selects the best reviewed hotel in the city as his choice of shelter. To top it all off, Archer makes sure to fly first class on AirCanada, both ways to make sure Eggie is proud. Code: 4. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)The time has come -- Anthony Archer has become so physical that he's lost control and has missed a lot of big hits lately and taken out his own players. More particularly his defense men, in a sad attempt at back checking. After the 3rd Dman bites the dust, they have no more healthy scratches or depth to pull from and Anthony is called into the coach's office the next day. He briefly explained to him that not only is this a punishment for taking out half of their defensive line, but it's also the only choice they have, which is to put Archer on defense. The coach is aware Archer isn't exactly the strongest skater when it comes to skating backwards. He basically explains to him that he doesn't really have to cover people, he should just hit everyone he can, as long as he doesn't kill the forwards. Anthony Archer smiles and nods in approval. Code: 5. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)Code: 7. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)Code: 8. Written, 4 TPEViolets are blue I just wrote about the SHL being dead And what we can do The ratings are down The fans are watching football It makes the players frown When they hear Tom Brady down the hall Things just aren't the same So gather up all your cash And please come to a game Or our jobs will be gone in a flash We won't overcharge by a cent Please come fast, we can't pay rent Anthony Archer - S49 12th Overall
1x IIHF Silver Medalist (S51) 2x WJC Gold Medalist (S48, S49) 2x Four Star Cup Finalist (S48, S50) SMJHL: 42G 40A 82P 304HIT // SHL: 17G 17A 34P 326HIT ![[Image: AA42.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/524595115767889943/606612124646637578/AA42.png)
Julio TokoloshRegistered Posting Freak Code: 3. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)The Blizzard and Steelhawks have teamed up in an effort to help the youth of their cities. A child’s upbringing is incredibly important and plays an incredible role in the type of person they will grow into. The two teams started in Hamilton, where they went door to door and offered a laptop trade-in program, where the children from Aaron Wilson’s number-crunching sweatshop were allowed to trade their calculators and laptops for hockey equipment (sticks, pucks, pads, goals, pass trainers, etc.). These gifts will enable the children to explore the game of hockey for themselves and truly get to enjoy the wonder of [simulated] hockey, without having to look at it as an algorithm to be cracked. The children of Edmonton were given the laptops of the Hamilton children. They were given a hard reset and made so that they could only be used artistically. Harry Carpet came out and said some nice words, before having Julio Tokolosh and Hugh Jazz give some hands-on teaching and signature coaching. (168) Code: 4. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)It’s been a decade since the avian flu swept through North America. Old man Knouse left his lucky skate laces in the rafters and told the boys to get them down and harness their luck to defeat Hamilton. In doing this, Tor Tuck caught a teensy bit of the virus and needed to miss a game. The coaches and GM’s called upon Julio to switch to defense for this time. This was an easy decision for the brass, as Julio previously had endurance as a strength, which would help him with those long defensive shifts. Positionally, Julio is very sound with a rating of 99 and should be able to keep up. As a pass-first player, Julio is able to easily snap it tape to tape and jump-start the offense. The double red line passes are going to tear up the league for that one game. Julio’s volume is the size of a cow, so theoretically, he should be able to block plenty of shots, although his body weight and strength are very low (like a balloon animal cow), so he might struggle in the crease a little. (188) Code: 6. Written, 2 TPE (100 words min)Based on how the statistics ended up, i would bet on Tony Pepperoni to win the Sarmad Khan Award. The Sarmad Khan award is voted upon by peers, players, coaches, etc, and is a very safe choice for Pepperoni to win, as he has been the highest-flying player opposing the unpopular Steelhawks. He is a safer choice for this than the Ron Mexico Award. The Ron Mexico Award is given to the regular season most valuable player, as selected by a committee. Although both are regular-season awards, Pepperoni is likely to gain from some postseason biases. Tor Tuck and Tommy Tuck are also very eligible to win defensive and goalie awards respectively. (112) Code: 8. Written, 4 TPEWhen I think of how my time is spent, To evening, from when I wake up in the morning, I think of what my wife would resent And if she’d find my work ethic boring. - A nine-to-five is not too odd Plying my day away at a desk, But my priorities are flawed I find myself focused on the rest. - Spend an hour on sports and fantasy, Football and hockey, a carousel, But worse than reddit, youtube, TV Is time that i spend on the SHL. - “No honey, I’ll be home late once more” Truth is I’m refreshing SHL and discord. Code: 9. Written, 1 TPESimon T Hockey Simulator’s acronym Is STHS Code: 10. Graphic OR Written, 2 TPE (100 words min if written)I really wanted to make a graphic fro a few flavors, but I don’t have the time, so I will list some of the potential flavor names and their tastes. Edmonton - Blizzard Blast - It’s repackaged cool ranch doritos. Calgary - Dragon’s Breathe - A reasonable level of spice. The chips are darker though, so it looks spicy. Minnesota - Minnetonka Moist - This Gatorade tastes like GM controversy with an aftertaste of tampering. Winnipeg - Jet Fuel - This Gatorade tastes like liquid steel beams New Orleans - Spooky Smoke - Cajun dry rub and cigarette ash chips Los Angeles - Cat’s Meow - This Gatorade doubles as a cologne. Very classy. Texas - Dry Rub - Mesquite BBQ Chips San Francisco - Lion’s Blood - This Gatorade tastes like iron, like actual blood. Hamilton - Lemonade - Just kidding, it was pee in a bottle! Fun if you know, but really ruins the party. Chicago - Deep Dish - This Gatorade is served in a deep dish pan. why? Buffalo - Buffelbro - The Gatorade is mostly buffalo sauce, dripped down Tomen’s pecs. Toronto - Kesseldog - Chips co-produced by the guy that sold the story about Kessel being a hotdog addict. Manhattan - Manhattan - 2 parts whiskey, 1 part bitters, 2 parts vermouth. Garnish with orange. Tampa Bay - Gulf Stream - This Gatorade has real bits of pelican in it. West Kendall - Coco Razor - These chip bags just washed ashore. Not sure if they are full of drugs. New England - Chowderade - Bring the flavors of the sea to your sideline. Code: 18. Casual Member Special
Fitted2106Registered Posting Freak
1. Me and phineas gold really soaked up the grand stage in the vip room many drinks many party favors many but grabs just kind of how life with phineas goes. We didnt watch the game much more or less checked tinder on our phones when your partying like this with mr gold nothing is out of the question and nights can go into morning. It was around midnight that I lost phineas found him later at a trap house and let me tell you they had young jersy turned up to 11 this party was cracking way better than the vip seats we had although all those free drinks were really starting to take effect now. I caught phineas dancing with what looked like a wild a wildabeat but Phil was did not even know where he was all good in my book so I just kept to myself blacking out drinking absurd amounts of alchol and doing more drugs good time ten out of ten.
2. Carolina kracken win the cup 3rd straight we sang sweet terry guy and took the cup for a drive down main street in carolina beautiful sight. It was in round one against Vancouver we knew we had them right where we wanted them down 3 games to 2 phineas gold and rickey bobby took over each recording a hat trick in a 6-2 kracken victory we took this energy back to carolina in game 7. Back in carolina it was the rykov symphony alexi fired in 5 goals in a 7-4 kracken wave that propelled us to win the next 8 games and roll to a 3rd straight cup. GM fuzz after this victory had his hall of fame ceremony they inducted him early due to immense skill to bring this team 3 straight cups after when he arrived had a pretty bare cupboard in montreal hes also voted GM of the decade and put on the shl all time team as the gm/coach it's a glorious summer for the kracken who had been there for all 3 cups many stay down for another season and a shot at number 4. 4.4. The kracken have taken a serious knock in the lineup and coach trella has asked me to step in at.... goal yes goal a center playing goalie but the transition should not be to hard seeing as I was a catcher for ten years pretty much the same position. As long as I get use to this big stupid stick I think I'll be ok my reactions are top notch and the defencse in front of me is pretty solid As long as we keep the pressure on the opposition this actually could be a cake walk. Phineas actually was taking shots at me in practice and hit me in the helmet so now I have a concussion but the team doctor said I'd be fine key word there TEAM doctor I think I'm fucked but guess I gotta out on for the team heres to cte and ruining my career bravo doc! 5.5. Michael fitteds offseason has been pretty intense he started a baseball career over in the pbe and is working to balance life in both sports it's not easy but to be a great athlete it takes alot of dedication. The one hasnt been to bad to me a great start hitting .313 in the first half before cooling to a modest .280 with this offseason it's all pbe and stick work circuit training as well I've transformed my body to become more equipped to 2 sports and the rigors of the shl. By the time next season starts here in the shl I plan to be the guy on my team so far I've played a good support role but it's time for me to be a leader and give my teammates hope, we lost phineas this offseason and someones going to have to fill those shoes so the more time I put into stick work and circuit training I'll be more than ready to fill those shoes. 9. Fhm do now Simulation hockey yes pleased Do soon much happy 18.Casual Member Special 1. S26 2. Season 49 Winner: Hercules Rockefeller (EDM) 3. Julio Tokolosh 4. (3)Akashi SixNine, Zivan Zidek, Al Kayhall ![[Image: Fitted_3.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/707653716320190484/741476808381169746/Fitted_3.png) 2x 4Star Cup Champ s49 s50 1x commissioners excellence award s 50
AvakaelRegistered Miracles and Nightmares
#1
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rangersbruinslightningRegistered Member
18. Casual Member Special, 3 TPE max - 1 TPE for participation, 0.5 TPE for each correct answer - SEND ANSWER IN PM TO "PT DIRECTOR" (tagged below) DONE
OrbitingDeathDonators S15 Challenge Cup Champion
Task 1 – 3 TPE
Time to visit Edmonton again with my management team. My player agent Ivo Willems has played a season for the Blizzard so he already asked if he could tag along for the right, so we will be visiting games 1 and 2. As I would like my agent to take good care of me we have booked the most expensive and luxorous hotel we could find, to make sure I remain his number 1 client. During the game we don’t want to eat fast food so since we have the best seats in the house, we have already ordered a buffet from a catering company that will serve us the finest dishes they have during the game. Since SDCore is paying for it, we have ordered this for 100+ persons, so that everyone around us can also profit and won’t boo us out of the stadium for interrupting them watching the game each round of food that is being brought in. Lets hope on some delightful games! Task 2 – 3 TPE In this alternate universe Vorian Atreides played a fantastic role in these playoffs, after being called up he was updated in the sim immediately and as a result of that would center the Panthers their 3rd line. This new found blood in the line up would spark the team to greatness and Atreides would shut down every opponent he faced, in return he would have managed to score some important points versus Edmonton, making sure it is not the Blizzard in the finals, but that the Panthers would be. These finals against Hackilton Cheathawks would then be rigged and re-simmed for as long as it took to make sure that the Panthers would take home their first cup since Season 17. A cup win is long overdue for this franchise and with their GM tenure it would only be great to see them winning another. It shows how much the city supports the team since the same GM has been cupless for over 33 seasons now and they still continue to support him. So in this alternate reality, justice will finally be served again. Task 3 – 3 TPE It’s good to see both teams doing a fundraiser around the Challenge Cup finals, to make sure there was a goal that would benefit both cities, the money raised will go to upgrading the arenas of both Hamilton and Edmonton. To make them ready for the new decennium they will need high tech upgrades, new massage chairs for the players, a scoreboard which can show the replays from any angle (even from below the ice floor to see the players movement and check the goal line!). The teams understand that charity is usually meant for something good, so they picked a cause close to their hearts. Both Edmonton as Hamilton hopes for the continuous support of their fans in order to make the dreams of many (namely the board members) come true. To start of the fundraising they will hold a lottery in which you can win a bag of pucks and some smelly game-worn socks of the players. Who wouldn’t want to win that! Task 4 – 3 TPE Injuries happen, but to have both of your goalies knocked out is something else. In order to still suit up coach Wastlund decided to throw Vorian Atreides in the net, with his 10000 year life experience, he should know how to stop a puck, after all he helped stopping wars in the Butlerian Jihad, so how hard can it be. So during the training Max Mauldin and Philipp Winter as two veterans of the team would try out the rookies goaltending skills. Turns out, they were non existing. It was like they were firing on an empty net, which by closer look also was the case as Atreides had fled the cease and was hiding in the penalty box. When the playoffs continued, you can imagine that the Edmonton Blizzard would indeed sweep the Panthers, lets hope these injuries won’t happen in future seasons. Stay healthy Knox, your team depends on you a lot!. Task 15C – 1 TPE A nice long hug from Teddy Cuddles, this seems a safe option to endure. But unfortunately Vorian Atreides did not read the small letters of the contract involved to this. So here we are sitting 128 hours later and Teddy still has Vorian wrapped up in a cuddling position. Please send help as soon as you read this, as we have no idea how much longer Vorian will survive this! Task 18 – 3 TPE – Answers sent! ![[Image: m38.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/m38.gif) Update Thread - Player Page Update Scale Former players: Ivo Willems (S9 SMJHL) (S10-28 SHL) Xander Green (S33-35 SMJHL) (S36-47 SHL) Vorian Atreides (S49-51 SMJHL) (S52-61 SHL)
AcsolapSHL GM Me go boats
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![[Image: 66624_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/66624_s.gif) ![[Image: 56096_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/56096_s.gif) Credit to Ml002, King, Wasty, Carpy, Bruins10, Rum_Ham, Turd Ferguson, Ragnar and Enigmatic for the sigs.          Player page | Player updates ![[Image: wMGKypg.png]](https://i.imgur.com/wMGKypg.png)
golden_apricotIIHF Federation Head Trade Me
1. Wooo VIP status baby!!!! Who would not be excited for Corey to pay for my trip to the SHL finals game 1 of the series. Its gonna be great! Im going to fly in and get a police escort to the building and then walk in with my suit and tie. Likely glasses too because im not paying for any of this. Then ill probably spend some time down in the stadium walking around the lower levels where the teams suit up for the game and maybe spend some time on the bench visualizing what it is that will happen out there that night. Then after some time, I think ill head to the dressing room and put on my gear, I forgot to mention that Im playing in the game right???Best seat in the house too! Right there on the bench next to all of my friends in the rebellion. (3)
2. So this playoffs everyone in the SHL, and I mean EVERYONE is talking about how good Hamilton’s goaltending has been which is true, but come on, let us give some love to a player in this new alternate reality. I believe that in this new world a defenseman would be leading the league in goals and helping his team to the challenge cup this season. That man is Michaud who will put up at least three goals a game, routing other teams and sending them home crying. His performances, legendary. The playoff results outside of that can be the exact same for all I care, just give michaud the goals he deserves and let the finals play out. The west is meh anyways, like why is a NOLA team in the fucking western conference? Anyways michaud would win playoff MVP in a landslide with the best playoff performance in league history. (3) 3. For a fundraiser, the two challenge cup teams, the Edmonton Blizzard and the Hamilton Cheathawks decided to team up and play a game of American Football (real football for people living in freedom land, and hand egg for those living in brexitville). As the teams rolled up to the game it was clear, there would be a lot of offense. The high powered Blizzard quickly took the lead using a prototypical offense seen at the college level. When the Steelhawks got the ball what occurred next was no surprise to anyone, they ran the triple option and never once threw a pass, driving the ball down the field and matching the score. On the Blizzards next drive, after their third completion in a row, the Steelhawks decided to complain about the passing game and claim that it was cheating. They decided to quit the game since in their minds they could not win with the cheating going on. (3) 7. Okay hear me out. Wanna know how to bring fans into an arena? This works for all teams and never once looked like a bad idea. We need to bring cheerleaders into the games and have them help the fans get excited for the game. This will be their only job, and this has nothing to do with having attractive women dance provocatively in the corner of the rink to distract the fans from the random crap that might go on both on and off the ice. I don’t see how this could go wrong. The SHL is also not a biased group so we will do what other pro leagues refuse to do. Only Male Cheerleaders will be allowed on the stage and they will do their best to make sure fan engagement is the best It could ever be. I am a big fan of this idea and I hope you are too. (3) 15a. the advantage will go to the goalie who will face fewer shots. This will likely be Tuck based off team shot share during the regular season where EDM finished 2nd in the league in the 120s for percent shot share where Hamilton was almost 10 percentage points lower. I got Tuck here b. EDM needs to stop taking penalties, giving the Steelhawks more offensive zone time and thus more shots. If shots are going the be the deciding factor in the series then limiting PP attempts and maximizing your time on the PP will also be a huge way to capitalize on the series. c. Michaud is the X-factor in this series no doubt. After scoring the GWG in the series against Manchester in the last series he is coming in hot to the finals. Also after getting his travel paid for by league commissioner Corey he will be extra rested for what should be a great series for the young defenseman. d. Best name in the series is Michaud. This name is very French in nature meaning that he is probably going to be good at hockey, as we know all French people in the country of Canada are good at the hockey thing. Additionally I made the fucking name so it better be my favorite. (4)
MavfathaRegistered Posting Freak
NSFL CW
1. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) Well if SDCore is paying I'm absolutely taking the SHL up on the offer to have an all-expense paid vacation to Edmonton even if I do have to watch some hockey or something too. In particular I would go to the biggest mall in North America which I hear is in Edmonton by virtue of a quick Google search. I'm not much for malls normally because they have a bunch of overpriced stuff I don't need, but come on it's the biggest one in North America and SD is paying for all my stuff, so I'll get whatever the heck catches my eye at all. I'll also spend basically an entire day at this cool Waterpark I found - hopefully they'll sell me copious amounts of alcohol while I'm there to drink away my sorrows from not being in the playoffs. I'll also go to these cool looking botanical pyramids I found just to kind of stare at the outside, not actually go inside to the botanical part. 18. Casual Member Special, 3 TPE max Sent ![[Image: gotze_team_siggy.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/744742467332472884/756903210769317919/gotze_team_siggy.png) ![[Image: lKRNHAn.png]](https://i.imgur.com/lKRNHAn.png)
AcsolapSHL GM Me go boats
1: Rex Kirkby always has VIP status, even when he doesn't he doesn't care and just takes it anyway. Who is going to stop a 6'2 mountain of muscle when they tell you to get out of the way? The back to back and likely threepeat Bojo Biscuit winner has established himself as the premier defenseman in the SHL and as a result is treated like royalty at any hockey event. Along with Cameron Carter II and Augustus Wang they will be attending game one in Edmonton not because they want to go to Edmonton, who does?, but because it will let them get past their public commitments and get to the golf course earlier. Due to them being friends with Gabe Johnson they knew that he wouldn't mind them running up his tab at the arena with 1.2 million dollars of champagne for them and the entire ballerina cast of the Bolshoi ballet.
3/16 2: In every reality but this one there can be only one outcome of these finals. That is when the true legend of the SHL and all things elite comes to the fore and drags his terrible team past the Steelhawks and all the way to the Challenge Cup. Enter JODAN. If it wasn't for a deep running CONSPIRACY in this reality Cameron Carter II would have won ten challenge cups in a row as well as pretty much every award including all the goalie awards. CC2 is so good he barely needs team mates at all other than to tell him how good he truly is. Honestly who even cares who the Chicago Syndicate were up against because it doesn't even matter. The only possible outcome is that the Syndicate sweep with CC2 scoring a perfect hattrick in every game as well as grabbing a gordie howe while beating the other team senseless. 6/16 4: The West Kendall Platoon have slowly descended from the heights of their early 40's dynasty and at the beginning of the 50's are starting to suffer the effects of a depleted roster, especially among their forward line up. Luckily for them their D corps is still pretty strong and they have Rex Kirkby on the blue line who has a pedigree of playing forward to a high level as shown by his performances for the UK national team in the IIHF tournament where he won forward of the tournament one season. On top of his already excellent defensive abilities he has a high level of stick handling and is considered one of the best passers and skaters in the modern game. As well as this he has been working on his face offs in the off season with reknowned face off teacher Hugh Buttercheeks which will enable him to compete with even the most seasoned opposition centres. 9/16 7:As it was discovered that Hamilton had been match fixing, the only possible way they could actually win a championship, the fans were rightly pissed off. However as it was noted that every other team in the league had somehow managed to maintain the integrity of the game the fans didn't think there needed to be a huge amount changed. The idea that had the most support was adding a 50 kilogram weight to the end of every Hamilton players' stick thus making it next to impossible to raise the stick in a shooting motion and only allowing their players to make short passes to each other. Much like Arsenal in the English Premier League this would mean that instead of shooting the puck the Steelhawks would need to find a way to score by only passing it into the net and more accurately represent the overall skill level of the team. 12/16 15©: My x factor skater this series is without a doubt Samuel Michaud. While he doesn't do much this is just a ruse to lull the opposition into a false sense of security. When you least expect it the third pairing D man will ghost into the slot and slam the decisive goal home as witnessed by his elite shooting percentage (25%) 13/16 18: Sent 16/16 Credit to Ml002, King, Wasty, Carpy, Bruins10, Rum_Ham, Turd Ferguson, Ragnar and Enigmatic for the sigs. Player page | Player updates
karlssensRegistered S28, S45, S49 Challenge Cup Champion
2. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min)
In our current reality nearly everyone and their mother is cheering for the Edmonton Blizzard in hopes this dismantle the big, bad Hamilton Steelhawks. They're a threat to this league what with their exploits and smug attitude. In the alternate time line however it is discovered that Edmonton management led by Keygan and TommySalami have also been exploiting the league sim engine dating back to their victorious S49 Challenge Cup win (Keygan was unable to optimize lines in S50 due to a damaged monitor hence why they failed to make finals that year). The difference is this management team was much more subtle about it. Now with that information exposed for all to see fans around the world have no idea who to cheer for in the S51 finals. Instead they're forced to pick the team they want to win instead of the team they believe deserves to win. It truly is a wild timeline. 4. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) In an act of genuine kindness Brady McIntyre takes the whole team out for some authentic czechia food following their game 4 victory over the Panthers to secure their berth in the Challenge Cup finals. Unfortunately the mom and pop czech restaurant had some bad lamb and a significant chunk of the team fell sick to food poisoning entering game 1 against the opposing Hamilton Steelhawks. Karlstraße has always been a chicken man so he didn't eat the lamb, but with a depleted forward core the 4th year defender was asked to fill the void and play 1st line wing in the absence of Teddy Cuddles. The Blizzard would lose, but Karlstraße would do quite well out of position as the shoot first "defender" paired nicely with the pass first Pepperoni who we found out is a vegan. When you think about it, it makes sense. A guy with the name pepperoni is probably so sick of eating meat. A nice vegetable medley is a welcome change of pace for him. 6. Written, 2 TPE (100 words min) From Edmonton I have to go with Tony Pepperoni. The Blizzard are built upon a strong defense with 3 of their top 4 TPE earners sitting on the blue line entering S52. The one outsider is Mr. Pepperoni who has quite the jump on the next forward which are either several season younger than him, or much older and fighting heavy levels of regression. Pepperoni is in a prime position to likely repeat his performance in S51, which has him in the discussion of several awards including the Mexico and perhaps Khan award for MVP as voted by the committee and league respectively. On the other end of the ice you have to admire the work that Tig Murphy has displayed as of late. The hulking blue liner was in the running for the Stevens in S50 and will be in the discussion again in S51. It's hard to argue the veteran defender couldn't put himself in a similar position again in S52. 15. Written, 5 TPE (50 words min per) A. No bias, but I'd give the advantage to mr. Tuck. He is a proven veteran goaltender with a wheelbarrow full of awards including a pair of Challenge Cups. He's been in this position before and he's delivered so I'd take the proven track record over the hot hand. That being said it's only a 7 game series and sometimes all you need to do is ride that hot wave. B. Despite their physical style of play racking up additional penalty minutes I think the Blizzard need to stick with what got them here. One of the top teams coming in to the playoffs they continued to prove why they're so dominant by knocking off the Dragons in a pivotal game 7 and then dispatching the Panthers in a quick 4 game series. If the Blizzard find themselves in a hole going in to games 3 or 4 perhaps try to retool on the fly, but I'd start the series off the way they've been playing all season. C. The x-factor to me has to be the goaltending. As we've already mentioned Hamilton's netminder Kryyst has been nothing short of perfect these playoffs and if he can continue to play the way he has of late it's extremely difficult to say the Steelhawks are an underdog despite their regular season record. If however Kryyst comes back down to earth and performs similar to how he did during the regular season we could have a very interesting series on our hands. On the other end of the ice the Blizzard's x-factor has to be Tony Pepperoni. The veteran center has reached new heights this season and his MVP calibre performance could be enough to get the Blizzard across the finish line and earn him his 3rd Challenge Cup before regression even hits! D. I'm going to double dip here and select Tony Pepperoni and Geezus Kryyst once again. Tony Pepperoni just rolls of the tongue nicely and always makes for some terrific color commentary. This season especially has seen some wonder play calls what with the number of points and amazing performances he has racked up. Geezus Kryyst is great for many of the same reasons. My first reaction when the goaltender robs me of a sure fire goal is often to look skyward and curse, perhaps even say jesus christ. The play calls during commentary would be equally fantastic as mr. Pepperoni as well. To cap it off Tony has an estranged brother who used to play in the league, Tommy Salami. In fact he even spent some time with the Blizzard I believe. E. With the Challenge Cup in the rear view mirror and my poor Blizzard falling well short of victory I'd have to pick F. That's some next level meta stuff if Aaron Wilson had to come up with a strategy to beat his own strategy (5D chess). However I'm going to pick C. There is no greater sensation than cuddling up man sandwich style with the Tuck bros. It doesn't explicitly say it, but they better be climbing in with me if they're tucking me in. 18. Casual Member Special, 3 TPE - sent.
NobleTeam Germany Sing Songer
TASK #1 - 3 TPE
Well it's that time of the year again, when the SHL community is invited with VIP tickets to come watch the Challenge Cup Finals. At this point, the stands are slowly just being eaten up by more and more league players meaning less fans, but who cares. This year, Nickolas Klaus and Nolan Sawchuk of the Tampa Bay Barracuda were shipped off together to watch the Challenge Cup Finals between Edmonton and Hamilton for the S51 Championship Banner. The big difference this season? Corey is paying. That means we are doing the full expense trip and we aren't saving him any money because we don't love him. Cam and I start our night off by absolutely running up a bill on drink tickets before catching some concession food and inviting a couple of team mates from our days in Kelowna up into our booth. It was a great opportunity to catch up with some old friends. TASK #2 - 3 TPE In my alternate reality the Tampa Bay Barracuda wouldn't have played like absolute dog shit this season and would have made a serious run in the playoffs to fix the reputation that overtook them after being reverse swept in last season's finals. Tampa Bay is still a young and hungry team with a lot of time on their hands to make moves, and this season should have been their renaissance but unfortunately something seemed off all year as key contributors were relegated into bottom scoring roles and found their numbers plummet. Due to this odd nature, many suspected mental harboring to be the big issue, and claimed that the effect of the last championship game was what knocked them off their big trajectory. This season should have run differently, and I wouldn't have been surprised to see a rematch of last season's final between the Calgary Dragons and the Tampa Bay Barracuda. Time will tell how TBB will progress. TASK #4 - 3 TPE Alright is it going to be a surprise to anyone that after Benjamin Blue gets injured they put the 6'11", 350 pound guy in net? No I didn't think so, of course Nickolas Klaus is being shipped between the pipes. After Blue got hit by an errant cheesebun from in the stands and had his throat slit open, the Barracuda had to make a quick fix and threw Klaus in net with Blue's jersey and equipment on. The thought no one would notice, but Klaus happens to have a couple inches on Blue and so I don't think many people were fooled. Klaus ended up being awful so the Barracuda actually bent over and put the backup in net but it was a valiant attempt none the less. Blue seems to be out for good though, so Klaus may need to start doing some goalie camps to be all ready for next season. TASK #6 - 2 TPE Someday I can promise you will be seeing Finn Rhys winning awards. I don't really know what awards they will be, but the guy is a tremendous work horse and someone that I have known for a quite long time through sim leagues. He is an exceptional dude and is totally deserving of some accolades, and is building a really great defenseman at the moment that I think will be a franchise player for the Blizzard down the road. If I'm wrong then you can shoot me dead but the guy is dope and his player will also be dope and I think I have 100 words now. TASK #15 - 5 TPE A. In my opinion Tuck takes the advantage here. With more experience in the Challenge Cup Finals and a better track record all around, Tuck is a proven contender in big games and shouldn't let down for the Steelhawks. With two games out of the way though, he will need to find a way to recover. B. The big question is whether either team is really ready to change their game. Provided the Blizzard can keep their game clean while still being physical they shouldn't have any issues contending with Hamilton's power play. Limiting the rule breaking nature should be top priority regardless, so I think Edmonton should carefully stick to their guns. C. I think Tony Pepperoni is going to be a big difference maker in this series for Edmonton. I've always liked him as a potential Challenge Cup star and I think this could be a series where he really shows off his skills yet again and shows that he's an X-Factor player. Pepperoni could be the make or break for the Blizzard in this series. D. Even if we just talked about him, Tony Pepperoni has the best name. I don't know what it is, maybe it's the just the sound or the way you have to move your mouth when you say his name (haha look at you, you look silly) but Pepperoni is a funny ass name. Sorry that I'm a child I can't help myself. E. I want to have a tug of war with Tig because I want to feel the effect of them big ol' biceps pulling against Klaus's gigantic frame to see who would have the upper hand. These are two absolute beef cakes on the ice, and I think it would be interesting to see who would in a friendly competition of masculinity. ![[Image: Klaus2.jpg]](https://i.ibb.co/v1QV0M1/Klaus2.jpg)
Alex MackRegistered S27, S29, S32, S40, S42 Challenge Cup Champion
1. 3 TPE
I would definitely go to Edmonton for the first 2 games. Edmonton has some hot women who wear a lot of animal prints, it’s just sexy. Also they have an amazing hotel called the Fairmont Hotel Macdonald. Anything with the word Macdonald in it has always been pretty amazing. Edmonton also has some fun things to do like visit a waterpark where the women delight in wearing less clothes then they have to the other 364 days of the year. They have trampoline parks, have you seen a pair of DD’s on a trampoline lately? Go do yourself that favor. When I am not hanging out at the rink giving the guys a hard time and waiting to see how crappy hockey is played I will also go visit Privé Ultralounge it’s a great night club where you can shit talk the other teams in fact you will see Edmonton’s star goalie there trying to score with the ladies. It’s a good watch. 5. 3 TPE On the off season my player has a ritual it starts with about a week’s worth of sleep followed by a good 4 days of love making and then dinner at some of my favorite restaurants and socializing with my friends that I don’t get to see as much when we are playing. I will relax but only for a short time before I start my vigorous work out sessions with my private trainers. Once I feel I am ready for next season I take a short vacation with my woman and we go to some place exotic last year we went to Fiji because watching fish swim while you lay in bed is very relaxing, it’s also great as you’re receiving a massage of any kind. The people of Fiji know how to treat a superstar such as myself. When I return home I start my daily diet of spinach and Kale smoothies and steaks and vegetables for dinners. 8. 4 TPE The best team in the SHL is Calgary. I would love to sleep with slappy’s wife. When we win the next Cup I will do it. He will most likely quit Calgary. It will probably all be well worth it. @Slappydoodle 9. 1 TPE When I skate on ice my thoughts are of Mrs. Slappy and scoring both goals 10. 2TPE ![[Image: Dragon-Breath.jpg]](https://i.postimg.cc/YS90q7cj/Dragon-Breath.jpg) 11. 3TPE ![[Image: Fresh.jpg]](https://i.postimg.cc/R0YvGnWL/Fresh.jpg)
![[Image: Depositphotos-46829959-original-1024x602.jpg]](https://i.postimg.cc/ZnGbSBp1/Depositphotos-46829959-original-1024x602.jpg)
acdangelRegistered Member
Task 4 - 3 TPE
The coach would almost certainly be asking Dangelchek to move to defense. As Sasha already isn’t a high-powered offensive player, it’d be the natural request for the coach to make. The kid has a big body and isn’t afraid to throw his weight around. He has the playmaking skills to help up the rush and generally plays a pretty selfless game. Furthermore, he has the stats and the build to back that up. Dangelchek sits at an 80 in defense, 76 in skating, and 73 in passing. These aren’t fantastic numbers, but they’re fairly respectable for a relatively young guy. Last season, he had 101 hits to take opponents off their game. He had 32 points, of which 22 were assists. As a breakout semi-offensive defenseman, the assists are crucial. Admittedly, he did sit at a -6 at the end of the season but let’s be honest here. Plus-minus as a stat is trash. With the big body, defensive prowess, and breakout and playmaking ability, Dangelchek could be quite a serviceable defenseman. – 172 words Task 5 - 3 TPE I would think that Sasha Dangelchek is planning on heading back to Czechia to work on his game. He knows he hasn’t performed up to the level he should have in the last few seasons, and he is determined to change that. The dude is basically going to live in the arena, only moving between the weight room and the rink. He plans on eating an incredibly healthy diet and drinking exclusively fresh water from the melted snow. He’s essentially going to eat, sleep, and breathe hockey. Nah, I’m just kidding. He is going back to Czechia, but he plans on hanging out with his boys and partying almost constantly. He might skate once or twice, but it might be by accident in a drunken stupor. He’s been known to break into places while intoxicated. Dangelchek isn’t a responsible fellow and he’s appalled you might think that. He has a reputation to protect. – 153 words Task 8 - 4 TPE New England missed the playoffs again And it really kind of sucks. How does that make you feel, my friend? They’re the SHL Canucks. Talent isn’t really the problem And if I’d have to guess The league went out and really robbed ‘em And they surely must confess. It seems that in the league this year There’s been some manipulation And now the honest teams, I fear Must take an early vacation. The head office had to really scramble And on a new sim now, they’ll gamble. Task 9 - 1 TPE I’m not in the league I still play for the Scarecrows I know I’m not good. Task 15 - 3 TPE B. I’m a big believer in playing to strengths, and it seems that Edmonton has the physical game locked up. They should continue with that style of play. This doesn’t mean playing reckless like Brad Marchand or some trash bag like that. Play a heavy game but play it responsibly. It’s very possible to play a tough game without constantly having a player in the box. Don’t get away from the hitting game as that’s a strength, but don’t be an idiot out there either. – 84 words D. I haven’t been a kid in quite a long time but names like Hugh Jazz still make me laugh. So, I’m going to go with that one. I’ve always been a sucker for names like Hugh Jazz or Seymour Butts. Call me immature all you want, but I get a chuckle out of it. Punny names and farts are always funny, although farts really have nothing to do with this. – 70 words E. I’d take the hug from Teddy Cuddles. I mean, who would say no to a hug? Especially from someone who I assume is essentially a giant teddy bear. There’s a reason why there are “Free Hugs” signs at every music festival I go to, and the reason isn’t exclusively related to mind altering substances. Hugs are bomb. - 57 words Task 18 - unfortunately I think it's 2 TPE Sent via PM ![[Image: danglechek.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/364939328046235651/711998419991789638/danglechek.png)
RaiNRegistered S35 Challenge Cup Champion
Code:
1. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) VIP Status again babyyyyyyyy - your player has been invited to attend one of the first homestands of the CC finals as a VIP guest - all expenses paid, front row seats, any hotel you want - and it's all on the Commissioner's dime! Eggy has complained to me the past two seasons about having to pay for this so I'm graciously volunteering SDCore to front the costs for this season's splurge! Are you going to Games 1 and 2 in Edmonton or Games 3 and 4 in Hamilton? Why are you picking there? And what are you going to do in that city to run up SD's tab?? (This is the same prompt as in the past but we've got different cities! be creative! Don't re-use what was written last season.) LOL at Hamilton. That place smells awful and literally a horrible city to go to if I’m being honest. Niagara is maybe 45 to an hour away but still, definitely wouldn’t see myself there. Also Hamilton cheats soooo, there’s that. Edmonton least has some decent slopes this time of year and the West Ed mall which is one of the largest attractions I’d imagine. I’d honestly just go to the slopes and run up the resort tabs with alcohol and skiing. Sounds like a good time to me. May pop over and buy some rollies with Eggys money but it’s not always necessary. I also heard theres an underground china club in Edmonton, so that would probably be the last thing I hit up before leaving. The fans in EDM are electric so would be a blast and I’m still on the hate train for HAM since they basically put the SHL in shambles until we have a conclusion. 159 words Code: 2. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) Alternate Reality: Physicists and other smarties believe that this reality is just one of infinite realities existing alongside this one in parallel. Take us over to one of those realities in which everything is the same but these S51 playoffs have unfolded differently. What happened in that reality's playoffs and who's in the Challenge Cup over there? In the Alternate reality Hamilton would still lose because the hockey gods would know what is best and what the right thing to do is. Hamilton should not be in the finals, they shouldn’t have been allowed to compete imo, it’s unfair the players sure, but that’s what happens when managers desire to win becomes too overbearing and they resort to selfish actions and find ways to manipulate systems in favour of themselves. So to be completely honest, nothing changes. EDM should win and hopefully win. I bet it leaves a great big sour taste in everyones mouth right now that they are even in the finals. It’s actually dumb and the league still doesn’t know what to do because we can’t find ways around it other then capping players at 10 because really, what else is there to do. It’s unfortunate but what can we do now. Hamilton shoudn’t be allowed to be competing in the playoffs. Their success is basically due to manipulating a system that worked. 169 words Code: 3. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) The two finals teams have decided to team up for a fundraising opportunity to benefit both cities. What noble cause will the teams decide to benefit? What sort of fundraiser will the teams hold together? How will the two teams mesh before the finals start? Given all the recent events in the US and despite these teams both being Canadian teams, I think these teams should donate and fund for the cause of putting up a wall around the USA. Honestly, if ya’ll go to war, we aint tagging in lol So all proceeds will go towards the wall and will also adopt Minnesota as Canadian since that just makes sense.. Snow, hockey etc. But in seriousness, given that we don’t wan to go to war over a man who most of us Canadians strongly disagree with, we must take action and really consider building the wall around USA. Tbh we may gain some traction on this. The teams will have the support of Canadians all over and the support of parliament which will obviously approve all the legislations for this to actually happen. Once funds have been tallied, blueprints will begin. GO CANADA GO 150 words Code: 4. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) Pretend that your team has hit an injury bug - the roster is so depleted that your coach is asking you to play out of position. What position is your coach asking you to play and what about your player build will help you be successful in this new role? After lots of injuries depleting the lineup of the Kelowna Knights GM BadApple and line strategist Katth have asked for me to speak with them in their office. In conclusion of the meeting, they request that I would help the team out on the back end and play some defence. To be completely honest, AB2 doesn’t mind playing some defence. He’s a big body who likes to throw some weight around and besides, he’s not the most skilled in the D zone, some forcing him to play it may actually allow him to appreciate it some more. If he ever has to, he may transition to defence later in his career when he’s old man legs catch up to him but honestly, the position wouldn’t’ be all that bad for him given AB2 has size, speed and can shoot which ultimately helps a defenceman shoot through traffic and sometimes hit the net. Would be a good switch in my opinion. 160 words Code: 5. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min) The Most Generic Prompt of All Time - what is your player looking forward to in the offseason? What are they planning on doing? Training? Relaxing? Testing free agency? Whatever it is, let us know! For AB2 he has planned to travel during this off-season. Last off-season he stayed in B.C to train with the fitness coach and nutritionist in Kelowna, but this year, he is very much wanting a break from hockey. He’s had 2 finals appearance in 3 seasons of play and I think that has taken a bit of a toll on him. Twice he has gone to game 7 and lost so he simply just needs a break, in which, in reality will hopefully be impactful in a positive way. He’s certainly thinking of a soul searching trip, somewhere to Africa or Western India, but either way, will be fun. He’s always wanted to go to Egypt so perhaps he will take his adventures and curiosity there. Once he returns, hockey will be on his mind again. He wants nothing more then to win in Kelowna but should the season not go so well, he may end up finding himself on a stronger contender although KEL should be solid again next season. 171 words Code: 9. Written, 1 TPE Write a haiku about an SHL-related topic. Be sure to follow the 3 line, 5-7-5 syllable structure or Godzilla will stomp on your house/apartment while you sleep. HAIKU: https://poets.org/glossary/haiku Love Fantasy Hockey So many ups, downs its madness Sign up now or else Total 16 TPE ![[Image: QhAQn2i.png]](http://i.imgur.com/QhAQn2i.png) ![[Image: yIvjn4j.png]](http://i.imgur.com/yIvjn4j.png) |
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