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Lord of the Pucks: The Fellowship of the Puck - Part 1
#1
(This post was last modified: 08-11-2020, 04:48 AM by Leoben.)

Quote:Ready for grading, 2300 ish words

It was a typical practice for the Renegades.  Spirits were high, they were in the playoff hunt and looking to avoid a similar fate to the prior season where they fell to the Dragons of Calgary.  There had been a change of leadership but so far everything was still going smooth.  There was laughter and jokes and merriment by all.  The TPE was flowing and there seemed to be no end in sight.  All of that was about to change.  Fate had something else in store for these Renegades.

Luke (@'luketd'), a wizard and keeper of realm data, had made a special trip to Dallas.  It was uncommon for someone from Manhattan to make it this far West, especially since the Rage were in a different division.  But here he was, and he did not carry the demeanor of a man here on a casual visit.  Luke had a serious matter to attend to.

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Luke

No one knew hold old Luke was, or where he came from.  Some say he is a thousand years old but that mostly comes from children.  All anyone really knew was that he appeared one day and knew everything that needed knowing.  One time a player asked him how many short-handed goals were scored by away teams in the second period during Season 46.  His eyes rolled in the back of his head for a few seconds before he spouted off the answer.

Bjorn Leppanen (@puolivalmiste) ran up to Luke and gave him a great big hug.  “Luke my friend, welcome to Texas!  What brings you down to these parts?”

Luke was all business as he coldly gazed into Bjorn’s eyes.  “I need to speak to Gil (@ThatDamnWalrus), and I need to speak to him now.”

“Gil?  But he’s in Nevada!  That’s quite a journey from here.”

“He’s in your locker room right now.  GIL, COME OUT, NOW,” Luke’s voice boomed as he slammed his cane on the ice sending cracks all over the rink.

Gil slowly came out of the away team locker room where he had been hiding.  “It’s in here, Luke.  This way.”

“What’s the meaning of this?”  Kaarlo Kekkonen (@dankoa) was knocked down when Luke shattered the rink and had finally gotten back on his feet.  “Luke you can’t just show up here making demands.  Gil always hangs out here.  He’s more than welcome.”

“Kaarlo, when the time comes I will tell you everything.  But please, leave us be.  The entire league is in great danger and I must speak with Gil.”

Luke followed Gil back into the visitor locker room.  Gil pointed him toward a closed locker at the end of the room.  “It’s…it’s…it’s in there.”

“I need you to retrieve it.  I can’t touch it.  It’s too much power for someone like me.”

Gil cautiously walked over to the locker and pulled out an old hockey puck.  “Here it is.”

“Quick, put it in this satchel.”  Gil slowly trudged toward Luke but stopped halfway.

“Perhaps I should hold onto this after all.  For safe-keeping.  It can’t be trusted in just anyone’s hands.  And I have had it for so long already.  When you think about it, I deserve to keep it.  It’s not even that powerful.  It’s just a nice little puck.  No, I think I shall keep it Luke.  I deserve it.  It’s mine.”

“Gil, don’t be stupid.  This puck can do damage far beyond our reckoning and it must be dealt with.  Now stop being silly and put it in the satchel.”

“No, you can’t have it.  It’s mine!”

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Gil

“FOOL OF A WALRUS!  YOU ARE MAKING ME VERY UPSET.  NOW PUT THE FUCKING PUCK INTO THE FUCKING SATCHEL BEFORE YOU BECOME A MERE STATISTIC ON ONE OF MY SPREADSHEETS.  INTO THE SATCHEL.  NOW!”

Gil began to cry as he placed the puck in the satchel.  “I’m sorry,” he whimpered.  “I didn’t mean any harm.  I wish I never came across the puck in that cave.  I wish none of this had ever happened.”

“It’s okay Gil.”  Luke attempted to comfort him but it was to no avail.  “Thank you Gil.  I know this wasn’t easy.  You are very brave.  Now, I must call a meeting with the Renegades.  You are welcome to attend.”

“Actually, I think it’s high time I left this place.  Nevada seems nice this time of year.”  And with that, Gil packed up his belongings and said his farewells to all of the Renegades.  He hopped on his pony and headed north to Las Vegas.

The Meeting

Luke requested that Bjorn call a meeting with all of the Renegades.  It was a matter of utmost importance and it would require everyone to attend.

“Should I send for the prospects?”

“No, we must spare the prospects if we can.  Some of you may not make it back and they will have to take your place.”

Luke had set up a few tables with ale and bread in the center of the shattered rink.  The Renegades made their way over to the table and took their seats.  Luke looked around the room and a sudden pang of guilt swept over him.  He realized what burden awaited these players.  Some of them would never be the same again and some of them might not even survive.  He took a minute to look around to see what brave adventurers had assembled before him.  There was Andreas Kvalheim (@raymond3000), the aging leader, Josef Kubinec and Kaarlo Kekkonen, the warriors, and White Goodman (@Jearim), the axe-wielder.  Then there were four young defenders, Noah Brusky (@BrewskyBoy), Piotr Horvat (@Slowpoke), Adam Scianna (@RedCapeDiver), and Bjorn Leppanen. 

“Gentlemen.  I thank you for coming.  Please enjoy some bread and ale.  We have much to discuss.”

“Is Gil okay?”  White Goodman, the quiet axe-wielder, was always one to look out for his fellow teammates.

“He is on his way back to Nevada.  I think it is best that he stays there until our task is done.”

“And what is our task?”  Josef Kubinec, one of the warriors, had been quiet all week.  “Look I’m only signed through the end of the season so I’m not sure how long this is going to take.  But these are uncertain times.  I’m not looking to get tied down.”

“Josef,” Luke responded, “that might be the most intelligent thing you have ever said.  These are by far the most uncertain times in the history of our league.  And since there is no time to waste, I shall get straight to the point.  Have any of you ever heard of the Puck of Power?”

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The Puck of Power

“The Puck of Power?”  Piotr Horvat leaned forward.  “That’s not a real thing.  That’s just a fairy-tale that Evok (@Evok) tells the Citadelles before bed.”

“But the stories are true Piotr.  As true as I am standing here in front of you.”

“The Puck of Power?  That’s ridiculous.  If such a thing were real then surely the league would be in awful shape.  But we’re thriving.”

“Kaarlo,” Luke said calmly.  “You think that everything that has happened recently was by mere chance?  The crumbling of STHS?  The rise of the Superteams?  .900 win seasons?  Squads of goons defeating teams with ease?  My dear boy, I assure you these events had nothing to do with chance and everything to do with the evil within the Puck of Power.  And, if the Puck of Power is not destroyed, the league as we know it will cease to exist.  The regular season will become irrelevant as the same teams fight for the same spots.  Rebuilds will take centuries.  Regression will be merciless.  Streams will have to move to RealPlayer.  Discord will be no more and we will have to use AOL Instant Messenger or ICQ.  Things will get so bad that we will long for the days of Jcink.  The Puck must be destroyed, at all costs.”

Noah Brusky sat up in his chair.  “And I suppose you want us to destroy this Puck of Power?”

“That I do Noah.”

Andreas had been listening intently but since no one else wanted to ask the next question, he stepped in.  “How, Luke?”

“We must take the Puck to the deadest place in the league.  It is a place where all things go to die and all ideas, be they good or bad, find their end.  It is a long and perilous journey but one that you can make, if you work together.  But it will take a great effort to get there.  You will face unknown dangers and some of you will probably not return.”

“Wait a minute,” Adam Scianna chimed in.  “You don’t mean that we need to take it to the…No.  Luke.  You ask too much.  Even if we had the entire Southwest Division by our side it would be too big of a task.  You’re not really suggesting that we take this to the…”

“The Suggestion Box.  Yes Adam, that is the task in front of us.”

“One does not simply walk into the Suggestion Box,” said Josef.  “Andreas, tell them.”

“Josef,” Luke replied.  “You are the only ones capable.  I hate to ask you, but it’s for the greater good.”

“I say we keep the puck for ourselves.  Use it to our advantage.”

“Josef!  How can you suggest such a thing?”  Andreas was disappointed in his lieutenant.

“Come on Andreas we are not getting and younger.  Have you seen Buffalo for fuck sake?  Or New Orleans?  I mean yea maybe we can beat Edmonton or Calgary if luck is on our side but be serious.  Do you want to go down as a guy without a Cup?  I don’t!”

“We always said we’d never resort to those dirty tactics.  We were above that.  But now you want to cheat?”

“It’s not cheating if everyone does it!”

The group began fighting amongst themselves about what to do with the puck.  Luke looked around the rink and was disappointed in all of them.  Finally, he set his eyes on Bjorn, who was quiet through all the fighting.  “I’ll do it,” he said.  Suddenly, everyone got quiet and stared at Bjorn.  “I’ll carry the Puck to the Suggestion Box, alone if I have to.”

Andreas ran to Bjorn’s side.  “You will never walk alone.  We are all here with you.”

“I’m sorry,” Josef said.  “I just lost my head.  So much power, and I haven’t even touched the Puck.  Keep it away from me.”

A wave of relief washed over Luke.  “Then it is settled.  We leave at once.  I have a bus out back.”

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The Fellowship Bus

The team packed up their gear and put it on the back of the school bus.  They would drive all through the night in shifts. With Noah Brusky driving first.  Not all of the Renegades were able to go, and Andreas realized that those that were left behind would need to be ready.  He instructed Ivan Maximus (@thiefofcheese), SLATT Potts (@Rindiee), Guy O’Shea (@JSS331), Alexander Watcher (@MP7), and a handful of others to stay behind.  “Should we fail, this team will need you to lead them.  Take care of the prospects.  And see if Goetze (@Mavfatha) and Czerkawski (@majesiu) can stick around until we get back.”

Luke walked over to Bjorn, the brave defender who had volunteered to carry the Puck.  Luke handed him the satchel and instructed him to protect it at all costs but to never, under any circumstance, touch the Puck with his bare hands.  Bjorn took the satchel and hopped on the bus.

And so it was that the Fellowship of the Puck was born.

They drove in four hour shifts.  Andreas Kvalheim took the second shift.  The road was long and windy and the terrain was flat and desolate.  Andreas noticed a figure up ahead.  Adam Scianna was sleeping in the seat behind him.  “Adam.  Adam, wake up.  What’s that in the road ahead?  Is it a person?”

“I don’t know, let me get Luke.  LUKE!  There’s something in the road ahead.”

“Oh no, already?  Let me see. “  Luke took out a pair of binoculars and peered ahead.  “Oh, no.  Bjorn!  Hide the Puck, hide under you seat.  Cover your ears!”

“What is it?”  Kubinec was confused and annoyed to be awake.  He looked ahead and finally saw the figure.  “Oh no.  Oh God no.  Everyone!  Cover your years!  Don’t look, and whatever you do, do NOT listen!  It’s WannabeFinn! (@WannabeFinn)”

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WannabeFinn

“That’s right,” Luke said.  “He will try to offer you a sweet deal but trust me, it’s not so sweet in the long run.”

The players all hid under their seats except Piotr, who had just taken over driving duty from Andreas.  “Oh shit!  Who’s gonna cover my ears?  Guys!  Guys!”  No one could hear Piotr. 

WannabeFinn was within a few hundred yards now and his sweet whispers could already be heard.  “I’ll give you a 500 inactive for two 2nds and a fish.  I’ll give you a reddit 7th if you don’t touch Buffalo during the Expansion Draft.  I’ll give you a 3rd rounder and a prospect for Andreas.”

“Haha I’m not a GM you idiot!”  Piotr was mocking WannabeFinn now.  “Guys, he’s not so scary.  Ain’t that right little guy?  You’re not so bad.”

“Bowl of ice cream for the school bus.”

“Huh, I like ice cream.  You got yourself a deal.”

Transaction processed.

“Shit!  No!  What’d I do?” 

As soon as WannabeFinn stepped onto the bus, it transformed from a tattered old school bus into a state of the art tour bus with private rooms, a game room, hot tub, and many other amenities.

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WBF's new bus

"Oh what the fuck, how is that even possible?"  White Goodman threw his axe at the bus but it bounced off without leaving a dent.  "Did it always have that capability Luke?"

"I don't know, White.  Maybe?"

The Fellowship were now stranded on the side of the road as WannabeFinn drove off with the bus.

“No time to waste,” said Luke.  “The next town is ten miles away and we have a .689 chance of getting picked up before we get there.”

And so on they went with no transportation to speak of.  No words were exchanged.  Their journey had only just started and they had already tasted their first defeat.  But they were Renegades, and if there is one thing they were familiar with, it was defeat.  This was but a mere setback.

To be continued…

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#2

This was my favorite Creative media to read in a long ass time

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#3

Holy shit that was great @Leoben

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#4

I didnt know I needed this, now I need to know how to get myself in it.

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#5

All my fears about never achieving anything in the league have been pushed away by fear of this journey never being finished

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#6

this is how you do it, folks

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Fuck the penaltys
ARGARGARHARG
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#7

Code:
“Should I send for the prospects?”

“No, we must spare the prospects if we can.  Some of you may not make it back and they will have to take your place.”

*gulp*

Renegades Renegades Renegades Renegades

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#8
(This post was last modified: 08-11-2020, 11:10 AM by Slowpoke.)

08-10-2020, 11:24 PMLeoben Wrote: “Haha I’m not a GM you idiot!”  Piotr was mocking WannabeFinn now.  “Guys, he’s not so scary.  Ain’t that right little guy?  You’re not so bad.”

HAHA suck it @WannabeFinn

' Wrote:“Bowl of ice cream for the school bus.”

“Huh, I like ice cream. You got yourself a deal.”

Fuck

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#9

Brilliant!



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#10

Love it, need more! Laughing

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