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Interview with Bud Weiser's Family
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Archy Schalfley, Scarecrows beat reporter from St. Louis Sports News, recently sat down with homegrown talent Bud Weiser’s family. As with Bud Weiser, nothing was off the table to discuss as his family his just as rough around the edges as his mother (Shelly). Bud was the eighth of nine kids born to Shelly and his father Bob. Bud has played hockey in the St. Louis area his whole life and is starting to blossom as a stereotypical hockey player. We sat down with Bud’s parents, and four of his brother, John (1st born- 12yrs older), Jacob (4th born- 8yrs older), Jingleheimer (7th born- 2yrs older), and Schmidt (9th born- 1 yr younger), and what we found was pretty much a circus.

"Archy- So, Shelly and Don what was it like growing up in a house with nine children total?

- Bob- It was great, the government has paid me a lot of money to not have to work. My job is working my wife, if you know what I mean, and drinking beer. In fact, Bud is named after the pride and joy of this city and the best beer in this world, Budweiser- The King of Beers…..After this comment, we lost Bob as he insisted on singing the King of Beers song while he slam another one every 2mins.

- Shelly- It was an interesting time. Bob and I fell in love during grade school and had our first born, “I think Tony, but too many to remember”, during my junior year of high school. I wanted to follow in my family’s footsteps of continuing the catholic tradition of large families; however, Bob was a football star with a scholarship offer to Grand Valley State University and dreams of playing in the NFL. After his senior year, he ended his football career by jumping off a roof and landing on a concrete slab. He then started fulfilling his family ways livin off the government and finding any way possible to earn Workers Comp. 

Archy- That sounds like a very nice and interesting household. You four boys, what is your thoughts of Bud’s hockey career?

- Jingleheimer- I think he is overrated. I was better than him growing up, but just had trouble passing the 5th grade, finally did it after eight years. If not for school, I would have already been leading scorer in the SHL.

- Schmidt- Growing up, he was the most normal of my brothers and I wanted to be like him. I was at the rink every second I could. If Bud was not with his weekly girlfriend, he would be there with my working on our games. I am honored to have Bud as my brother playing for the hometown ‘Crows. In our family, we grew up “Making ‘Crow Noises” and snuck into most games. It will be sad whenhe gets drafted in the SHL and has to leave. He will be leaving me with the rest of these degenerates. The other worst part is I will not get his secondary kills at the bars.

Archy- So John and Jacob, what is it like living with a SMJHL star?

- John- It is nice, he pays for everything. The house has no tarps over the windows, he buys all the beer we need, and I get to slam any girls after he is finished.

- Jacob- Ya’ll got some crack?

Archy- No we do not, sorry. So Schmidt, I will just talk to you for now, as I am not sure we will get anything normal or coherent out of anyone else. What was Bud’s hockey journey?

- Bud started playing like all our other brothers at the age of 4yrs old. Our parents would drop us off at the rink and come back at dark. My second year of doing that, things changed because all of them older than Bud were suspended from the rink and league for fighting each other during a game. They got pissed at each other for hacking the last dart, drinking the last beer, and sleeping with each other’s girlfriend; so they swung stick at each other like lightsabers and took at least one skate of trying to cut each other. After that, it was me and Bud. We played St. Louis Americans growing up and eventually he made the St. Louis Jr. Blues. After his U20 year, he went to play one year of club hockey at Community College because he could not get into a four year school. After that one year, he was drafted into the SMJHL and went pro.

Archy- What was it like seeing your brother getting drafted?

- We knew there was only one option for him, the Scarecrows. Before the draft, some GMs may have received some help in not drafting him and leaving him to the Scarecrows. I believe this is actually why he was drafted in the late rounds. No other team would draft him and the ‘Crows knew that.

Archy- What is it like seeing Bud play professionally here in St. Louis?

- I think we already talked about it, but decent house, free booze, and free girls, even if they were already used.

Archy- OK, what about your hokey career? Will we see you go pro?

- I think those days are gone, I have to live on a penicillin drip due to the fun I have. There’s some things that happen when you are 7th in line for some fun. I also the alcohol to help sterilize my insides.

Archy- Thank you very much. It is not a big wonder to know why Bud is the way he is."

As you can see, Bud Weiser is a creation from his life and actually somehow a normal character compared to his family. I am not sure we will be interviewing the family again, but I cannot wait to see what is in store for his hockey future, as long with his outside of life does not catch him first.


1st post for double points

[Image: budweiser.png]
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