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S56 PT #3 - Subscription Service
#1
(This post was last modified: 10-12-2020, 12:16 AM by hotdog.)

These days, so many things are available via subscription service. TV content, meals, dog toys, hygiene needs, basically everything. 

A company approaches your player about a subscription service sponsorship. Your player will be the face of a new brand, offering something to customers on a daily/weekly/monthly basis? What is the product? Eko van Otter's Stinky Fish Meals? Esa Parmborg's Weekly Chicken Parms? Jimmy Wagner's Tank Top Collection? Julio Tokolosh's Ethical Veggie Burgers? Scoochie Stratton's Swiss Cheese Delivery Service? Describe the service offered to customers that your player is an especially good fit for.

Written option: 150+ words
Graphic option: Design an ad highlighting and advertising the service

You will receive 3 TPE for fulfilling all requirements.
Deadline: Sunday, October 18th at 11:59PM ET

Affiliate claims from either PBE or ISFL are accepted; link directly to your post and note if your username is different there.
If you have any questions/concerns, please PM me. Tasks with malicious intent will not be graded.

This task is for SHL players and send downs only, it is not for SMJHL rookies.


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thanks @Carpy48 and @frithjofr and @rum_ham and @Julio Tokolosh and @Briedaqueduc for the sigs
Armada Inferno norway
#2
(This post was last modified: 10-13-2020, 11:58 PM by Lime.)

For my subscription service I would create Steve Harrington's Strange Things. Every month you would get something completely random, no two people would get the same thing. The fun would be in figuring out what the hell I gave you, what to do with it, and where to complain that you wasted $10 a month on literal garbage. Why do I say literal garbage? Because most of the "strange things" are probably just things from my house I didn't really want to throw out but also didn't really want to keep. That's a special category of item with plenty of strange things in it, though they might not actually be useful. Once I run out of things I want to "give away" the service will stop until I find something else I wanna get rid of. So not everyone will even get something. That makes it even more special when you DO get something. Maybe trade with your friends. I don't care not my problem anymore give me money.

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Germany Berserkers Stampede Stars Barracuda syndicate
#3

2 mPT's this week? What a power move

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#4
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2020, 09:21 PM by hockeyiscool.)

While Dwight was doing his annual appearance at the highland games he was approached by a burly man Henry Haye with Havishham Harvest a Scottish bulk meal prep agency. He asked me to be the lead face in their new marketing campaign, "Food enough for the whole farm package." This food enough for the whole farm family package provides 2 daily meals that are traditionally Scottish for 10 people. For the first day the breakfast is Porridge for dinner is the classic meal of Haggis-for those of you who don't know Haggis is a savoury pudding containing sheep's heart, liver, and lungs, minced with onion, oatmeal, suet, spices, and salt, mixed with stock, and cooked while traditionally encased in the animal's stomach and boiled. Other meal options include scottish classics such as shortbread, black pudding, whiskey, cullen skink and scotch pie. After explaining what their service was and said that I'd get paid 500k just to have a couple headshots on their mailing letters. It was a no brainer, I didn't even consult my agent.
#5

Returning home to his apartment complex after a game against the Quebec City Citadelles, Vaseline Podcalzone finds a man waiting by the garage gate. Expecting it to be another desperate EBay fan trying to poach a dozen of his autographs, Podcalzone sighs and rolls down the window of his jet black 2020 Honda Civic sedan. The man does not shove a dozen hockey cards into the front seat of Podcalzone’s sedan, however, as he introduces himself as an ambitious entrepreneur hoping to sign Podcalzone on for a… very unique endorsement deal. Podcalzone chuckles and accuses the man of simply wanting to recruit him for a Multi Level Marketing deal, but the man ensures him that it is not the case, before revealing his company’s plans to sell a 3 in 1 care package, featuring Vaseline, for skin care treatment, Tide Pods for laundry, and finally, calzones for sustenance. Branding it as the Vaseline Podcalzone care package, the packages would be sent out on a weekly basis to subscribers. The man explains that Podcalzone would be the perfect fit as the brand ambassador solely off of his name. Podcalzone bursts out laughing at how ridiculous the concept is, but finally gets out a ball point pen and signs a contract approving the endorsement deal. And so, Vaseline Podcalzone 3 in 1 care packages can now be purchased online at Podcalzone.ca, or by checking in with your local supermarket!

Word Count: 240

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#6

honestly just get rid of me already i'm so washed

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thanks @Carpy48 and @frithjofr and @rum_ham and @Julio Tokolosh and @Briedaqueduc for the sigs
Armada Inferno norway
#7

10-12-2020, 12:16 AMhotdog Wrote: honestly just get rid of me already i'm so washed
trade deadline mpt topic

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Germany Berserkers Stampede Stars Barracuda syndicate
#8

My player will be sponsoring a vitamin water delivery service. Specifically Squeezed vitamin water. We would deliver nothing but squeezed vitamin water, and thats that. I drink an absolute shit ton of squeezed vitamin water, and if other people tried it while its iced cold they would drink it too. That stuff is like crack when its ice cold right out of the fridge, hits the spot. I'd call it Squeeze me a Squeezed. I don't know, that sounds kinda stupid but I think it'd work. Maybe "If you're in a squeeze, call Rotticus Scott and get a fresh ice cold squeeze". The Hamilton Steelhawk and Vancover Whaler fans would love it. Maybe I could do a goal deliver service for Hamilton, but we'd be delivering like actual nets to kids who need them to play street hockey. That'd be pretty sick, some charity action. So yeah, two good choices.

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#9

Ok wow so being approached for a media opportunity and endorsement is a huge honor for Stan Q Next because I mean who wouldn't want that and who wouldn't want the star of the Quebec City team and the best most underrated player in the league and everything. Anyways when looking at who wouldn't someone with the last name Next to be the name of a subscription service. So you can sign up for the Stan Q Next weekly insult and attack. As the handler of Stan Q Next I am well known for being a general dbag/ jackass/ asshole and whatever else you want to say and to have the NEXT insult of the week would be amazing and hugely successful. Who would now want an attack on hotdog for example and say that he overpaid for a bum free agent this offseason and his pitcher is wasting away and all that. Wild. what a great service. Stan Q Next. Insult extraordinaire
#10
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2020, 09:19 PM by 5ympathies.)

Everyday I regularly get bombarded with sponsorship requests. Being a face of the SHL, everyone wants to get a piece of me, and I've sat through many meetings with people trying to get me to peddle their face cream, or their beard oil, or their hot dog stand, or various generic fast food places. So often have I been bored out of my mind until one day, I let someone pitch me something special. Dick Clapper's monthly eggplant delivery service is now up and running. Every day you pay the small price of 99 cents (USD lol) and on the 31st day of the month, you get one, healthy, dick-shaped, large eggplant sent to your home. If the month doesn't have 31 days, well unfortunately you wont get the eggplant for that month. But don't worry! You still get the privilege of paying the daily fees for the month! This service is fully endorsed by yours truly, so you have nothing to worry about.

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Thanks to JSS for the signature


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#11
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2020, 08:25 PM by Dextaria.)

Ryosuke Sato got approached by a local ramen shop in Vancouver. They go by the name "Ramengers" and Sato is a frequent customer there. The store would feature a number of action figure collectables from Marvel to various Anime characters. This is where the owner had a bright idea to combine their two passions to bring customers both sides of Ramengers, a monthly subscription service offering a variety of instant ramen from the store themselves along with a collectable action figure that is unique for every box. Once Sato heard about this opportunity to be a part of the marketing for this, he was completely onboard. He was even offered a free subscription as well the duration of his contract! With that kind of deal, there was no way Sato can turn it down. With this, Sato's was in advertisements for the ramen shop and he even threw in a couple of signed items for some lucky fans in the subscription box. Hopefully their customers enjoy the added gift, collectable action figure, and some of the best instant ramen that Ryosuke Sato has ever tasted!

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Thanks to @DELIRIVM, @Moreorless89 and @ValorX77 for the sigs!
#12

Mat Smith was very surprised when he turned on his phone and he had a text message, a missed call, a voicemail, and DMs on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Tinder, and even Myspace. Before he got too excited, he saw that they weren't from anyone he knew, no, to his surprise they were all from the same company. How did they get all his contact information, he had no idea, but it kind of makes sense. He opened up the first message, and here's what it read:
"Hi Mr. Smith, this is Jeff Bezos, yes THE Jeff Bezos. I wanted to contact you to let you know that I've been following your career very closely since you were drafted by the Quebec City Citadelles. You see, I was thinking I don't like the name "Amazon" anymore, it's kinda too rainforest firey for my tastes. I think you would be the perfect name and face for a rebrand, we were thinking of calling it "Mat Smith's big shippy shippy worldwide web store." I'm prepared to offer you $100 million to accept this deal, and we can negotiate for more if need be. Let me know. Love you. Jeff (followed by a few emojis that we will be censoring here)"
Smith considered this offer, but after five minutes of thinking too hard he got a headache and decided to take a nap. After he woke up he didn't remember it at all and so he just left Jeff Bezos on read.

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#13

Code:
A company approaches your player about a subscription service sponsorship. Your player will be the face of a new brand, offering something to customers on a daily/weekly/monthly basis? What is the product? Eko van Otter's Stinky Fish Meals? Esa Parmborg's Weekly Chicken Parms? Jimmy Wagner's Tank Top Collection? Julio Tokolosh's Ethical Veggie Burgers? Scoochie Stratton's Swiss Cheese Delivery Service? Describe the service offered to customers that your player is an especially good fit for.

Last week my agent called me saying that a local sushi restaurant wanted me to be the face of their brand. Little did my agent know that this sushi restaurant was one of my favourites in town and that I eat there whenever I get the chance while playing in Edmonton. Sushi is one of my favourite meals so this partnership is a match made in heaven. 

My go to order would be a side of tamago, alaska rolls, rainbow rolls and an order of iced tea. The restaurant would make this combo the "James Truong Meal" (no relation to the Travis Scott Meal from McDonald's of course). The best part about this partnership is that a portion of the proceeds from my sushi combo meal would go to the Edmonton's kids hospital foundation. 

Not only am I getting to support one of my favourite sushi spots, I am getting to help out the kids in Edmonton and sharing my love of sushi to all  Blizzard fans!

(167 words)

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Thank you @High Stick King @OrbitingDeath @Ragnar @Tesla for the player signatures! 
#14
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2020, 07:26 PM by charlieconway.)

I went through several scenarios in my head for my answer to this prompt, and I was tempted to go with something that was showy but of little substance; a description fitting for Adam’s S56 season.

In the end I’ve landed on a more positive idea: a cheap pranking company. When I imagine what kind of person my player is, goofy comes to mind. Someone who’s willing to take things lightly and less seriously. Underperforming? Whatever, life’s short, it’s just a game, just have fun. Celebrate with fireworks that have duds for every second explosion. Maybe he’d come out with his own brand of board games or party games, intended for friends to just have fun and play.

I’d like to think he’d excel in commercials. Maybe one showcases Adam and some teammates playing a cards of humanity style card game. They laugh and have a good time, and at the end there’s a clip of him saying “I’m Adam Barron and I endorse ‘Adam’s Apples’” or whatever. Naturally, he’d get a cut of the profit. Maybe that would be a lucrative line of work, or maybe the brand just flops and he goes back to focusing on playing mediocre hockey. But that wouldn’t matter, because in the end, for Adam Barron, it’s all about the fun you had along the way.

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Canada | Player Page | Grizzlies | Player Updates | Inferno
#15

Gabe Johnson is not a man who turns down a good sponsorship. In fact, he's not a man who turns down a bad one either. He just really needs as much money as he can get because who knows how much longer he can get away with stealing a living playing hockey.

Anyway, for his sponsorship Gabe Johnson paired with young ISFL starlet Garfield Despacito Jr. of the Orange County Otters, as they're both under contract with the same agency. The subscription service was monthly themed apparel of both players with phrases making fun of the players due to their status as jokes across their respective leagues. The shirts are to include things such as "Gabe Johnson scored fewer goals than Simon LeBlanc" ( @Briedaqueduc ) and "Holloway > Despacito" ( @Paq ).

Both players were stunned by the overwhelming success of the service, because it just sounded like an idea doomed to fail that would get no subscriptions, but Johnson has once again discovered the general dislike of him to be even more popular than he thought it to be.

Johnson has called this his "worst sponsorship since the one I took from Viagra" but conceded that at least he got paid.

(Idk like 190 words)

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