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Kay Bee Presents: Trade Double Media
#1

This is for x2 trade deadline media (1411 words).

Hello Everyone, Keyboard Warrior here. Most of you probably don't know me as I'm usually a reporter for the Simulation Major Junior Hockey League attached to the Vancouver Whalers by virtue of me being Luffy Richard's roommate. Today I will be doing something I don't usually do, and that is talking about trades and doing research. By research, I mean looking at random trades of the past and trying to squeeze as many words as possible out of them. I will also be doing something unique in that I will be judging trades by the names of the players involved. Name-o-mancy is a science that is often overlooked here in this sim league, but the name of a player often reveals subtle things about a person, and everyone knows that when it comes to a simulation that it is the intangibles and not the hard stats presented on screen that will determine victory. Also, that was a hell of a run-on sentence. I'm pretty proud of that one. 

My interest in these two trades stems from the fact that I will be following Luffy Richard to the Toronto North Stars next season, and I wanted to familiarize myself with the new team I will be joining. If you don't find this interesting, dear friends, well, that's okay. This purely academic endeavor is more for my personal growth, but also to lay the groundwork for the historians who will wonder how the Toronto North Stars came into dominance around season sixty. Well, let us get down to the nitty-gritty and talk about the first trade I stumbled across because I have no idea what I'm doing, but I got bills to pay, yeah feel me?

So this is a rather famous and earth-shattering trade between the Toronto North Stars and the Edmonton Blizzard. The results of this trade are still talked about in hushed tones, so it was really hard to eavesdrop and get information on what to write about. I am of course talking about the trade that occurred on March fourth, of this infamous year. 

Toronto received First Name Last Name as well as Kevin Robinson for their season fifty-four fourth-round pick. According to the Toronto General Manager, it was a quick trade discussion that gave a couple of players the opportunity for Simulation Hockey League ice-time when they came up to the big league the next season. It was a low-risk trade for both teams, which is probably why the discussions went so smoothly. Not only did this benefit the general managers of each team, but the two players involved, as they got to play on a team that had space for young players. It sucks when there is a backlog of rookies ready for their time in the big league, but veterans are there to keep them off the ice. Sometimes it happens, especially if a team is strong at drafting and is blessed with an abundance of active players that help the team win. This trade kickstarted two young careers and also seeded the Toronto North Star team with strong roots from which to build a contending team. In the following seasons, the North Stars would add players such as Sato, Luffy Richard, and Sarah Burke to their prospect pipeline. An active locker room is an excellent path to success, so some shrewd early wheeling and dealing by the God-Emperor ML set the pace for a rebuild that might see the North Stars contending in a very stacked division.

I will be paraphrasing what those involved said about the trade (allegedly) the transcripts can be found on the post documenting the transaction if anyone wishes to fact check what I am about to write, but I'm about as honest a person as there can be when it comes to fake characters created to make media for a hockey player that is also fake. 

The General Manager of the Edmonton Blizzard, Keygan, had this to say about the trade: "I thank both players for their time in Edmonton. They were a pleasure to have around. Reality can be harsh sometimes. As harsh as a blizzard, and the reality was that there was not enough ice-time for them and they deserved to be out there growing as players and people. I did my best to find them a team that they could have an immediate impact on, and I believe the North Stars re that team. I wish you well on your new team, and hope you make the most of the opportunity that the Toronto North Stars will be giving you."

Kevin Robinson, in turn, had this to say to his Edmonton teammates and General Manager: "I thank the Edmonton Blizzard for the shot they took drafting me a few seasons ago. I will always remember the time I spent in Edmonton, and the lessons I learned there from my teammates and management. I am grateful for the opportunity to play for the Toronto North Stars and help them win. Thank you to everyone involved in these discussions. I will see you all in Toronto."

First Name Last Name could not be reached for comment.

The next trade I wish to discuss occurred on March fourteenth of this cursed year. It was between the Minnesota Monarchs (then the Chiefs) and the Toronto North Stars. The Monarchs traded Danny Marston and the New Orlean Specters third pick that went forty-fifth overall. The North Stars Traded the Los Angeles Panthers first-round for season fifty-four, and the San Francisco Pride's season fifty-three second-round pick. So there were a lot of different teams involved, draft pick wise, but the trade boiled down to Danny Marston wanting to be traded.

Negotiations went smooth between the two teams as Marston was adamant on which team he wanted to play for, and building off the momentum from the First Name Last Name and Kevin Robinson, the God-Emperor was eager to make a trade for the young Center who made his debut in the Simulation Hockey League in season fifty-five, playing fifty games with twenty-five points (eight goals and seventeen assists) and was a minus-thirty five. So far in twenty-seven games this season, the forward has twelve points (four goals and eight assists) and is a promising young piece for the Toronto North Stars who are still rebuilding, but as mentioned above, are getting some exciting young players in the next few seasons that should provide an injection of sugar, spice, and everything nice. 

There was not much else said about the trade in the transaction thread, so there isn't really anything here to paraphrase, but I did my best to show the circumstances surrounding these venerable trades that will live on forever in the grand history of this vaunted simulation league. It was hard doing the research for these trades because they were so far in the very distant past, but I dug deep. I jumped into the muck and pulled out these pearls so that I may throw it before you beautiful people (I'm sure that is how the saying goes).

Now to the Name-o-mancy portion of this exploration of trade artistry. This is gonna be fun because the North Stars traded for a player named First Name Last Name. His first name, First, tells us that he will always be the first Center into the fray. It speaks of a man full of courage and desire to be right in the thick of things. his last name, Last, tells us he will be the last off the ice, the last to give up, the last person to leave the bar. It is a name that speaks of an inability to retreat in the face of overwhelming odds. That is the type of player, and name, a team can hang their hopes on. It is a strong name, a powerful name, a name that is First and Last in line. Yes, the center will hold, because that Center is First Name Last Name. 

That will about wrap it up here folks. Thanks for the read, and hopefully you got some insight into the fascinating recent history of the Toronto North Stars. I know I was entertained by my little walk down memory lane.  

Until next time, 

Kay Bee,

out!

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#2

10-14-2020, 01:36 PMMoreorless89 Wrote: First Name Last Name could not be reached for comment.

"My time with the Edmonton Blizzard was short but I will always be thankful for the opportunity they provided me. It was really early on the site for me and I didn't really know many people back then. They gave me a shot and being able to hear my name being called when I was draft is a feeling I will never forget. I understand the roster situation was tight and the playing time wasn't going to be there for me. I appreciate @Keygan finding a great opportunity for me & coming to Toronto has really helped me flourish as a player.

Also shoutout @ml002 for bringing me to Toronto. My time here on the team has been an absolute blast & it's crazy to see how much we have improved as a team. I have met so many great people in Toronto and it's awesome to see how much the LR has been poppin' lately. Excited to see what the future holds and hopefully one day we'll be playing for a cup."

Great article btw! Appreciate the love Smile

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#3

10-15-2020, 01:08 AMgurbs Wrote:
10-14-2020, 01:36 PMMoreorless89 Wrote: First Name Last Name could not be reached for comment.

"My time with the Edmonton Blizzard was short but I will always be thankful for the opportunity they provided me. It was really early on the site for me and I didn't really know many people back then. They gave me a shot and being able to hear my name being called when I was draft is a feeling I will never forget. I understand the roster situation was tight and the playing time wasn't going to be there for me. I appreciate @Keygan finding a great opportunity for me & coming to Toronto has really helped me flourish as a player.

Also shoutout @ml002 for bringing me to Toronto. My time here on the team has been an absolute blast & it's crazy to see how much we have improved as a team. I have met so many great people in Toronto and it's awesome to see how much the LR has been poppin' lately. Excited to see what the future holds and hopefully one day we'll be playing for a cup."

Great article btw! Appreciate the love Smile
Thanks for reading it :D and helping with the inspiration.

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