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Teams I would want to be drafted to based purely on logos (please 2x media pls)
#1

Article is satire don’t hurt me please. I am not a graphic designer just a scrub criticising peoples hard work for fun.
Since I joined before the start of this season, I have barely been site active, only doing what is need to max earn, not doing much to get that paper. But, about five minutes ago I got some spur of the moment motivation to write a media and take advantage of that sweet, sweet double media bonus. Since I do not have the foggiest clue about anything hockey related, I thought “what better idea could I have than an idea I’ve already had?”. I am referring to, of course, my article ranking each Simulation Major Junior Hockey League team by logo. But instead,  for this piece I shall rank each team in the Simulation Hockey League by the picture that represents them under the SHL tab on the Simulation Hockey website, so if there is a different picture they like to represent themselves with, sorry, git gud. These rankings determine what order I would like to get drafted by each time. (Not really but I need this double media so badly please grader let me have it).

18. Tampa Bay Barracudas Barracuda : This one is a bit of a shame, because prior to Tampa Bays rebranding, they were actually set to land in quite a decent spot, as I thought their old logo was pretty nice. Oh well, I’m sure they are devastated. But the reason this logo comes in so low is because in my opinion, those Vice City colours just don’t work on a fish, or at all for that matter. Also, as I will come to later, originality is being factored in a bit and these colours are hardly original (although the fish is nice). For these reasons, TBB are the team I would least like to get drafted by (based solely on their logo). They also probably are taxed some by the fact I liked it quite a bit before.

17. Toronto North Stars Stars : Coming in second to last in my rankings, and the team I would second least like to get drafted by solely based on the logo they chose to define them, are the Toronto North Stars. Depicted in their logo is what I presume to be the CN Tower. Of course the Tower is an absolutely magnificent feat architecturally, but, and I don’t know about you, if I see that there’s a building on my opponents crest, I’m not exactly worried. To be fair to the tower though it’s a pretty cool idea, unlike the leaf around it. When I type in “Canadian logo designs” into, I see so much leaf, it’s unbelievable, so yeah, personally not a fan.

16. Texas Renegades Renegades : Do not get me wrong, this logo, is actually pretty cool, and well designed. However, if I’m going to bash the North Stars on originality, then it’s only right I rank the Renegades just as low. In my (humble) opinion, I could go to nearly any sim league and see a variety of this logo with the name Outlaw/Renegade/Bandit (lucky I’m not ranking names eh?) etc. As well as this, I think this is pretty similar to the Outlaws logo in the SMJHL (who I noticed have changed their logo, congratulations Anaheim I’m glad you took my advice on board, I’ll invoice you for the royalties) and I also ranked them quite low, so yeah, tough scene for you Texas, okay logo though.

15. Seattle Argonauts Argonauts : To quote a piece from my most recent media “say what you want about this logo, but it is a ship, no one can deny that.” and “The reason the Argonauts came in so low in this ranking is, as I said in the first line of my paragraph, it is a ship.” As well as being a ship logo, I don’t think the big Argonauts writing helps. Side note : If I was ranking the branding as a whole this would be top 5, because I googled what an Argonaut is and it’s pretty cool, although I would’ve gone Athenian Argonauts, even though SHL hates foreign teams.

14. Winnipeg Aurora Aurora : This might be a tad harsh but the Aurora really suffers from not having an emote in any server I’m in, therefore I’m not able to see the logo at its fullest. Looking at it on the forums it looks like a couple of trees under the northern lights, and while the northern lights are beautiful (and an Aurora I guess), in the same vein as the North Stars, when I’m thinking of a logo to intimidate, the Northern Lights would not be what I would go for (I guess that’s why I don’t make logos, huh).

T-13. Baltimore Platoon Platoon & Hamilton Steelhawks Steelhawks : This is me copping out here, but these two are tied up at this position because bird logo. In the interest of a good ranking, if I were to put one above the other I’d say the Platoon logo has a slight edge over the Steelhawks. I attribute this mainly to the lack of colours in the Hamilton logo (besides grey I guess). However, I don’t feel that this lack of colour makes a big enough difference for me to be able to separate the two. After all - bird logo.

11. Manhattan Rage Rage : This is getting pretty tough for me, pretty fast, but coming in at 12th are the Manhattan Rage. I get why they went with the red bull for rage, it makes a lot of sense from a branding point of view. What they’ve done with the logo is nice, and it’s pretty aesthetically pleasing, but it’s a pretty basic concept at the end of the day (not that I would do any better), and personally I think, while being nice, it’s a bit of a forgettable logo and the reason it places so low on my list.

10. Edmonton Blizzards Blizzard : Closing out the first half and opening up the top 10 in my rankings of teams I would like to draft me ordered by how much I like the logo we find the Edmonton Blizzard and their doggo. While I think the blue on this is ok, I think this one suffers from trying too much with their colour selection, and maybe they could have gone a bit plainer. This is completely backwards logic when you read what I said for rank 13, but eh, it’s my list at the end of the day and who really cares?

9. New England Wolfpack Wolfpack : Creeping into the top half of my rankings are the Wolfpack. In all honesty I probably could have tied the Wolfpack and the Blizzard if it wasn’t for two main reasons. Reason A) is that I’m trying stack this bank account up as much as possible and therefore an extra paragraph does me a world of good (every little helps) and Reason B) is the fact I simply like this logo more. I think what the designer did with the wolf snapping the hockey stick in two is a pretty cool and novel idea which ties an otherwise non-hockey logo in with the sport itself, and I feel the mainly grey colour scheme suits the wolf in the image well.

8. Minnesota Monarchs Monarchs : I feel like a broken record saying these things but again this is another truly great logo, one that is let down by a (in my book) questionable at best colour scheme. Looking at it I just wonder, who picked those shades of purple and green to go into their emblem, and why? Design wise though this logo is actually a very good looking one.

7. Buffalo Stampede Stampede : At first glance I actually disliked this logo and was ranking it pretty low, but it’s rubbed off on me pretty well since I first saw it. The minimalistic aspect of the buffalo design works well in tandem with its colour scheme of green and yellow. As well as this the wording, which I’m not a fan of on many logos, is not intrusive like it is in some others, and seems like a natural part of the crest.

6. Atlanta Infernos Inferno : The last logo that will miss out on the top 5 of my rankings of teams I would like to get drafted to based purely off of logos is the Atlanta Infernos. Conversely to the previous ranking in the Minnesota Monarchs, I think this Atlanta Inferno logo is one of the less impressive designs, probably my least favourite on this list. However, credit where credit is due, whoever decided upon these colours did it very well, even though I imagine it wasn’t a tough choice. Obviously red is what you think of when you hear inferno, so they got that spot on, and even though I’m not really a fan of words on logos at all, I think it’s kind of dumb in fact, what they did, making it look like the edges were lighting up, is a very nice touch.

5. San Francisco Pride pride : The first of my last 5 logos is the San Francisco Pride. Honestly, design wise there’s not much at all wrong with this one. I like the design of the lion and this is a case where the gold and purple does in fact work with its logo. It’s only really let down by external factors, those factors being that it reminds me way too much of Orlando City FCs crest, and I’m not an MLS fan. Sidenote on this one, I accidentally clicked on Portland Admirals logo looking at this one, who I assume were rebranded to SFP. Wtf was the Admirals logo? It looks like a funny looking turtle in a captains costume, and probably wouldn’t have place too well on this list.

4. Calgary Dragons Dragons : Considering I was trashing a couple of logos at the start of this list based on whether I thought they were original concepts or not, I find it a bit funny that a Dragon ranked so high on this list. But something I like to harp on about is whether the badge is intimidating, and in this case the dragon does it perfectly, being pretty scary, enough to prompt me under my bedsheets (doesn’t take much to be fair). In addition to this, the design is very good, with the dragon wrapping around the wordage, and the colour scheme of basically all red and silver works well in conjunction with the design.

3. Los Angeles Panthers Panthers : Another logo I wasn’t a fan of to begin with was the LAP logo, but after taking a while to look at it I can actually admire what has been done in terms of design. The sun rising behind the Panther is a very nice touch (although I am confused what this has to do with Los Angeles??), and the colour scheme is a nice mix of pretty unique while also working well with the badge.

2. New Orleans Specters Specters : The “nearly there” team of my SHL badge rankings list ends up being the New Orleans Specters. The figure in the logo works very well, especially when paired with the fleur-de-lis (yeah I googled that) behind it, which I appreciated quite a bit when I finally noticed that it was behind it. The colour scheme of dark purple and black works super well in my opinion, being a nice mix of eerie and cool.

1. Chicago Syndicate syndicate : Finally, we come to the team who, if I were basing my liking of them off of their logos alone, I would want to be drafted to the most, and it is to be the Chicago Syndicate. In my book, this logo is brilliant, I think it has it all. The mobster is the perfect blend of being a nice bit spooky, having a pretty original design (even if it is just a guy), and also managing to nail on the colour scheme, with the black, white and gold being dark but not too dark. To top it all off it does actually manage to be relevant to its franchise location.


Grader please give me 2x media even though this is barely half relevant if at all.
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#2

syndicate syndicate syndicate syndicate syndicate syndicate syndicate

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#3

+1
Dragons

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Knights|Dragons|Austria
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#4

Barracuda Highest score wins right? Barracuda
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