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S59 DFA Bounties #4 - The Alternate Timeline
#1

The SMJHL finals are on their way, and we're slowly closing in on the off-season and SMJHL draft.

Before the real busy season starts, and you're going to be answering scouting messages from every team, it is time to sit back and relax a little. Dreaming about how your life would've looked without hockey.

Written Task: What would your player be doing now, if he or she hadn't pursued a career in hockey? (250 word min.)
Graphic Task: Show us a picture of your player, doing what they'd do if they weren't a hockey player.

Reward: $500,000 for doing one of the above

Only current SMJHL Draftable Free Agents (S60 SMJHL Draftees, SHL class of S61) are eligible for this bounty.

There is no need to claim this anywhere. After grading the money should pop up in your account 'automatically'.

Deadline: Sunday, June 6th @ 11:59pm EST

 
Falcons Monarchs Switzerland   Switzerland Monarchs Falcons
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Falcons Monarchs Switzerland   Switzerland Monarchs Falcons
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Credit for the images goes to @Carpy48, @soulja, @fever95 and @Wasty
#2

If I was not a hockey player, I think I would probably have pursued a career in the culinary industry. Specifically, I think there's two ways that I could go. One way that I could see myself making a living would be as a baker - I absolutely love all kinds of little pastries and desserts, so I don't think I would mind if I was able to make them my full time job. I actually have a special croissant recipe that I've been working on perfecting for years now - it's really tricky since croissants can be quite capricious, so something small like a slight change in the temperature of your working environment can significantly alter the finished product, but I think I've managed to figure out a pretty good recipe (that works for me, at least). Alternatively, I could see myself running a sort of chill half-pub half-restaurant that's based around really high quality meats, so stuff like Wagyu beef and Iberian ham. I absolutely love cooking with high quality stuff like that (and I love eating them, of course), though I don't get the opportunity all that often because they are expensive as all hell - but when my SMJHL contract comes in, you bet I'm spending some of that money on some fancy shit like that. I would want the restaurant to serve super gourmet burgers, pasta dishes etc. but at an affordable price for the customer, as I think that as many people should get to experience it as possible. I'd end up running the restaurant at quite a loss doing that though, so that dream might be reserved for after I retire and have millions in the bank. I'm happy with being a hockey player though, but I do think I could've found plenty of success as a cook too.

        
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Patriotes Knights Latvia Knights Latvia Knights Patriotes
#3

If Adelie de Pengu hadn't joined the SHL, his options were pretty unlimited. As a superstar penguin athlete, Adelie had already made a name for himself in two other sporting leagues. He was a well know commodity and as his dream is to become the most famous penguin in all of sports, he would npt have stopped just because of an inability to play in the SHL. He would have explored other options and found other sports to compete in so that he could achieve his goals. Adelie had considered baseball for a long while even. He knew that with his flippers he would struggle to grip the bat, but he knew for a fact it could make a deadly outfielder due to his versatility and ability to slide around. He is deceptively quick as well, so he could be a n absolute terror should he ever get on base. That is just the tip of the iceberg as well. Adelie could have dived into many other things like wrestling. He had fought more than a few skuas in his life, so wrestling would be natural to him. There was also rugby, a sport very similar to the football that Adelie held so near, At the end of the day though, Adelie was an athlete. Sports are what drive this little penguin, so even if he hadn't made it into the hockey world he would still be giving his all somewhere else. It is just his nature and he can't escape it. Perhaps one day he'll play in all of the leagues.

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#4

Brand new to the hockey world, Melvin’s life changed when he traveled to Sweden to visit his cousins. However, sometimes he found himself wondering what might have happened if he hadn’t traveled halfway across the world. While he was a football star, and he continues to work hard in that arena, training recently for the SMJHL has made Melvin a more consistent athlete all year long. He had already noticed the difference that the training was having on the football field. Without having joined hockey, Melvin would most definitely be a slightly slower and less agile athlete. He wouldn’t have the lateral movement and flexibility that has come with the past several weeks of training with the St. Louis Scarecrows.

With his career nearly reaching its peak in football, Melvin would have slowly settled out into retirement and continued to work supporting his good friend and mentor Bubba Thumper in growing his restaurant chain. While Bubba’s work can’t be undermined at all, Melvin has a great love of pastries, and specifically cakes. As a self-proclaimed cake aficionado, Melvin would work hard to learn and elevate his own personal baking skills to become a master baker. Sought after throughout all of the world, Melvin’s infamous Red Velvet Lava cakes would become a staple production piece, reminding many users of the horrid time he murdered his friend. He would be requested fondly at weddings and events of his friends, as well as other former Colorado Yeti team members. While his lettering work on his cakes was always a little tricky for Melvin (writing itself is hard when you have hooves instead of fingers), he worked hard to create beautiful masterpieces for everyone who wanted them.

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#5

If Glatt hadn't first set eyes on a stick and Puck, out on a frozen lake with his mates many years ago, which led to his wonderous career and journey of becoming a hockey pro, he would have most likely stayed in his hometown. Growing up as a farmers lad he would have been set on being a farmer and continuing on his family business like it has been run for generations. Glatt has a soft side for animals and loves where his family has came from which still keeps him humbled to this exact day. With not much to do and with his anger not being controlled he would have took up the grueling training of the infamous Highland games. A huge event in his beloved home country, the Highland games are held in the spring or summer in Scotland and contain a number of sports that are only available, such as cabre tossing and hammer throw in this unique tournament. Due to Glatts proud nature and uncomparable work ethic he would work every single day to compete and win in specifically the main event, the caber toss. The caber toss is a traditional Scottish athletic event in which competitors toss a large tapered pole called a caber. In Scotland the caber is usually made from a Larch tree and it can be between 16–20 feet tall and weighs between 90–150 pounds. Not for the faint hearted which Doug Glatt certainly is not. No doubt he would have made his town and family proud.

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#6

Were Peanut Butter not to have joined the ranks of American hockey and more specifically the SHL when he did, then he most likely would have just continued on with his primary objective in life, carrying out his mission for the glory of his homeland, Russia.

Initially designed to be a sort of sentient weapon for the Russians during the Cold War, Peanut Butter is the result of an incredible amount of testing and trial and error on the Russians behalf in an effort to form the ultimate sentient weapon. Initially deposited into a jar of peanut butter, still in the trial phase, the sentience took hold and eventually took over. Outside of a trial number, no naming convention had been developed at that point in time for the being, but “Peanut Butter” was simple, and served the purpose. After extensive training, Peanut Butter was sent to Lake Placid, New York with the Russian national hockey team for it’s first real assignment, but something went wrong… No one’s quite sure of how, but during its time in New York, Peanut Butter developed two traits: A love for hockey, and an insatiable thirst for blood. By the end of the Winter Olympics, and after a trail of corpses had started to appear around upstate New York, the Russians decided the project was too dangerous to continue and left Peanut Butter behind.

Thankfully for Americans everywhere, Peanut Butter has found solace in the sport of hockey where he can take out his aggression in a productive manner. If hockey were no longer to exist however…. Well safe to say the nation would have a real problem on their hands.

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#7
(This post was last modified: 06-04-2021, 08:38 AM by Sebster.)

Ope this isn't the early bird PT (ignore this I am dumb).

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#8

Born in Moon Township, PA, Atticus Hale was destined to be a hockey player. His entire extended family was involved in hockey in some way with both his father and grandfather being coaches. This instilled a strong work ethic in Atticus and his blend of intelligence and instinct on the ice can be attributed to them and his drive to be a student of the game.

Atticus began playing hockey as soon as he was physically able to. He made a name for himself as a youngster in the PAHL where he was consistently the best player for every team he was on. Though he was never on the best team, he strove to make everyone on his team better even if that was at the detriment of his own personal statistics. Atticus kept this mindset into high school at Moon Area and as a member of the Pittsburgh Penguins Elite 16U team.

This stems from Atticus’s tendency to mirror the behavior of his father and grandfather as coaches. Growing up, when he wasn’t participating in his own team’s practices and games, he was by the side of his father or grandfather. He enjoyed teaching the game and seeing his peers improve and knew that if he couldn’t make it as a hockey player, he could coach in some capacity.

Atticus didn’t just know he could coach if that’s the direction his life took – he enjoyed coaching. Maybe not as much as he enjoyed playing hockey at a high level, but in the back of his mind it was his plan B.

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