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Fitted2106 · 08-18-2021, 06:52 PM

Welcome back shlucbs grugs and neopets it is I your almighty and suprememe commentor stan savern and it is my pleasure to drop upon you the S61 super shl draft sponsered by michelob ultra and Newport ciggarettes. It is with nothing but pleasure and sheer excitement that I bestow upon you this seasons luckey faces that get to grace the stage and start there journey to superstar or journeymen, for many of the players selected tonight this will be the highlight of there career because well most players end up being just ok but for others this will begin the first step to many much brighter bigger moments. So without further ado enough about my dumb ass let's get to the playas shall we.

Up FIRST with the number one pick in the draft IS

1. Rage Manhattan Rage - Melvin Majestik-Moose 329 tpe D

this is a sound solid pick that can really rehab an entire organization hes got no weakness in his game and has a true chance at being up by maybe next season for all the hell I know. Manhattan did tear it down last season and for that they get rewarded with a top of the line franchise d man. Teams should take notes it's always best to build your team from the back out to the front they cant beat ya if they cant score. Put this with juni panda and were looking at a bit parade that might never end hopefully the rage can add some more pieces in this draft that hit the mark as much as this one.

NEXT UP COMING IN AT NUMBER 2.

2. Specters New Orleans Specters - Atticus Hale 317 tpe F

This guy is a strong offensive player who's game in his own end still needs developing and that's ok the risk is worth the reward for such a well rounded offensive gizmo. NOLA needs all the help they can get at every position going foreward. Now I know it can be spooky in NOLA but hale is not afraid the guy litterally runs through demons every time he takes a rush coast to coast. With some proper coaching the guys a stud and is gonna have a fruitful career. Hopefully NOLA keeps adding peiecs like this as if they dont they might lose hale down the road if things dont start to turn around.

3.3. Patriotes Montreal Patriotes - Leons Breidis 351 tpe d

The top ranked defensemen goes to Montreal home of the stromboli and also known for its famous cheese museum. Heres another guy that could be a major team changing factor and help lead this team to some big deep playoff runs in the future. You can never go wrong taking a potential 2k defensemen as if you have 4 of them I guarantee you cup no dougbt about it baby. For a team thts looking towards the future this one will be looked back on as possibly the largest building block there was for these guys in the future.

Coming in at quattro place.

4. Rage Manhattan Rage ( Aurora -> Platoon -> Rage ) - Adelie de Pengu 313tpe D
Manhattan comes back

IS THIS DUDE RELATED TO THE INFMAPUS PINGY
IM REALLY NOT SURE BUT NOOT ZOOT BOOT AND GET THE LOOT DIS BOY DROPS NO COMMON ONLY BIG BOY GOLD. Another d taken off the board and man hatty is certainly bulding from the back end up baby that's what it looks like and boy oh boy are they gonn be a force eventually this stuff you cant make up someone call lime.

5. 5. Dragons Calgary Dragons ( pride -> Dragons ) - Grogu Mandosson 310 toe F

Here is a very reliable defensive foreward who can play in his own end but needs more time to develop his actual abilitys in the scoring end of the zone. That's ok says many scouts as grogu can take his time to develop before making the jump up. At fifth overall this is a risky pick and hopefully it pays off for Calgary I wouldent wanna see the rage when there mad.

6.6. Dragons Calgary Dragons ( Wolfpack -> Dragons ) - Darwin Koff 314 tpe
This here is a solid pick for the dragoons and I think it will play extremly well for them in the future no questions asked. This guy can do a little bit if everything hes solid in every aspect and can be counted on for the tough minutes. The dragons just made the confrence finals and now they get two top 6 picks holy fuck.

7. Forge Philadelphia Forge - Hans Graf 312 tpe d
Philly which is a young team gets younger and with another d it looks like they way they are building this team is strictly from a boring standpoint and they want 0 fans at there games. They have no star player and offensivly they ars typically anemic at best. This young team I sure hope eventually does something to put butts in the seats if not move them to Pittsburgh where the pierogies play and the tornaders dont stay.

8.8. Specters New Orleans Specters ( Barracuda -> Specters ) - Tomas Zadina 319 toe

Here's another guy taken early in the draft that clearly has some potential a very good offensive player who has some abilities lacking in his own zone that's fine. You can grow with that guys like this help build organizations in due time he should surely grow into quite possibly a quality franchise player no doubt about it I look forward to seeing him develop. This is just another case of the new SHL in seeing these players who are much further ahead offensively earlier on than we are used to seeing previously done.

9. Steelhawks Hamilton Steelhawks ( Monarchs -> Steelhawks ) - Gabe-Gooney-Waters Harrak302 tpe

Now here's a guy with a lot of crazy potential and ability probably the best offense of Reed in the J along with puckt handling shooting abilities passing you name it doesn't matter hes great at it now agility agility wise the man can't move literally can't go side to side now that's OK you know with a little development which Hamilton's good at I'm sure the guy will turn out to be a great player. Although although hamilton likes to miss deadlines they still develop great prospects and for that we salute them or maybe we don't fuck hamilton hamilton. Maybe maybe with a little time and it's all time and some great coaching impossibly impossibly a little work in the wait room which obviously this guy doesn't do it all being that he moves like my uncle at 2 am at the bar.

10. Argonauts Seattle Argonauts ( Argonauts -> Stampede -> Argonauts ) - Landon Fischermann

314tpe D

Seattle another young team another team loading up on young defense you really can't go wrong in this situation at all when you have a young team the best thing to do is to build them back and. Without having the proper defense to stimulate your offense you can't stimulate your offense therefore you get stuck playing someone else's game.. Now hopefully hopefully the higher up brass in Seattle knows what they're doing they can keep these guys together and let them grow together and fill the gaps when necessary. It will take time to tell how this roster will shape out in the future but one can certainly say you can't go wrong with high quality young defense men.. Now now his offensive skills aren't bad hes actually 1 of the best pocket handlers I've seen in a long time. and that really drives offense from the back end when you dont have any.

) - Landon Fischermann
11. Rage Manhattan Rage ( Panthers -> Stampede -> Rage ) - Eddie Kastrba 313 tpe d

This dude is probably the best overall defensive defense when I've seen in a long time to come out of the Jay. He also loves long walks on the beach with his cat and pet duck I like to pet his duck because well quack.. This dude honestly lives quite the outstanding lavish life for someone still in the J quite sure that there should be an investigation and if he was getting paid in his time in the J but Hey not my problem not my lizard. If you have a lizard let me know cause I'll make that 1 of my problem as a wise man once said Lord Stanley Lord Stanley give me the brandy.. Also where the fuck is lying he hasn't come by once in this show to comment or give his opinion I feel like hes fucking ducking me. Yeah it's big back to the studio and it's pet duck literally just checks wrecks and fucking leaves the specs all over the ice. If it wasnt for spell check I wouldent have a job.

12. Argonauts Seattle Argonauts ( Stars -> Argonauts ) - Willie Miller 328 tpe goalie

Here we have Willie Miller 1st goalie taken in the draft and also a big corner sore of hot dogs baby. If you go to the coconut store twice A-day what do you get Miller Willie that was really stupid and not funny at all just to give this man a pickle.. Being the 1st goalie taken can be quite the undertaken for a guy like this he has to live up to the expectations of being the 1st nightminder taken in a pretty deep draft I know not too many people create goalies anymore and I mean that's fine I wish no one did we should have eye a goal is everywhere so that there's lots of goals per game I mean I'm all for that. Hopefully this guy stands up and has a good career it'll be nice to see another goalie coming another goalie coming you know be a good goalie you don't see it too often I'll see it too often a lot of guys who are jammed and that's fine hopefully Willie Miller can do some big things here once the scouts talking about the kid hoping he can make some noisecan make some noise again only time will tell so much to be determined still so early in these careers of these bright eyed young guys who just quite aren't sure what life even is yet.

13. Forge Philadelphia Forge ( Blizzard -> Forge ) - Conner Snooks 288tpe

Corner shooks like captain hooks that's all right here's a very underrated forward coming into the draft that many didn't see going this high to be honest but that's all right. Guys like this fall all the time and this time they didn't he actually went up in the board I guess he had a good meeting with Philadelphia not really sure and everything that goes to philly sucks anyways because Philadelphia sucks but that's another topic for another time you know Pittsburgh's number one.. Tampa is actually number 2 because Pittsburgh's number 1 and that's OK this is the Michael fedex draft special where we talk about fucking fireflies captain hook and uh Tinkerbell it is what it is dude I don't know what to tell you I mean this is why you come here for this hardheading coverage we are the people's broadcast we brought you corner snooks presented by Newport cigarettes in Kitty cats.

14. Monarchs Minnesota Monarchs ( Renegades -> Monarchs) - Patya Perevalov313 f tpe

This guy might quite honestly be the best overall offensive player in the draft right now 15 offensive read very high getting open Puck handling passing decent screening really though weakness at all to his game can skate well enough to get the job done this is a motherfucking steal is a motherfucking steel. This is where you find teams that become super contenders when you get guys like this late late in the 1st round who end up being real game changes for you. Now I'll go to crazy and Say that this guy will be in the hall of fame or anything or have his Jersey retired but there's some definite potential here for this guy to be multiple times award winner 1st team All Star and you get it all at 14th overall in the 1st round you take that gamble every fucking time shit shit there's so many players in this league that are good taken late II wouldn't even want to pick 1st screw that at or 5th or 3rd or anywhere but the 3rd round. At his plea draft interview he said he loves ice cream the thought of cookie dough ice cream and new ports really gives him a good pregame meal so he can go out there and do his wizardly Puck handling where he acts like Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's hand the Sorcerer's hat or is it the sorting hat I'm not entirely sure I didn't really watch the movie.

15.15. Steelhawks Hamilton Steelhawks ( Platoon -> Steelhawks ) - Big Newff 297 tpe f

A player here who looks like he just wants to score goals or at least be in position to as the rest of his game is completely underdeveloped and is going to take some time to develop into a real bonefied regular in the SHL. Now that's all right with enough coaching and you know the right support system staff anything's possible for these guys I mean they're young they're young they're somewhat talented and they have the world by the balls periof the balls. Like if you were to take your time with these guys and really develop them the way you want say you didn't need a median help at the SHL level you can really do some big things like you can have 10 teams full of Jimmy Wagner's. Again the time the timeline for this guy is uncertain but pay he got drafted in the 1st round but again we've seen a lot of guys get taken in the 1st round that don't turn out to be 1st round the material. All in all it's gonna come down to if this guy takes his vitamins and minerals if he really wants to grow up and be a big boy and get to the next level it's all about that condition and baby and hes gonna need to really find his his aura zen all of it.

1616. Steelhawks Hamilton Steelhawks - Jay Cue 293tpe C

You're guys Hamilton again but I'm back on the 1st round for some reason people just keep giving them to them but that's OK you know why because now they didn't sign them in time hahaha huh huh huh huh huh big dum h'am. I mean seriously fucking if they fucked up on this that's what I'm saying I don't give a fuck what are they gonna do beat my ass I'm just some dickhead on the Internet they can't do shit this is the Michael fitted draft coverage baby this is the shit you come here for these pussies getting manhandled by HO hahahahaha ha. I've seen a lot of dumb shit in my day trust me I'm a dumb motherfucker I literally have hawk to train in a cool car with vodka and have to call the cops to stop it I'm fucking dumb but this from Hamilton the dumbest shit I ever seen literally gonna lose all your draft fixed cause you're a fucking moron. I don't know what Sam Wilton gonna come do fight me flaming in the forms oh no I so scared by the way JQI guess your players all right sorry I didn't really cover him it is what it is but this is the only way to end the Michael fitted a draft coverage the only way I see fit the only way I see proper in my world and my manifestation of what actually is the simulation. The troll train has come to Hamilton baby and the next stop is fucking whoever the fuck they are cause I don't know who the fuck's on that team anymore but I know it's they are so with that I say salute peace out fuck pick 1718 19 and 20 your boy is just doing his thing right now vibe and I'm a cold trouble and I'm at it and tell him to go base on ya please.

2807 words 2x

DONE READY TO GRADE